What is the whole thing with Buffy in her sundress? Why was that such a focus in this chapter? This isn't the first time we've seen Buffy wearing a sundress - she literally went patrolling in a miniskirt and wedge sandals. I don't understand why Golden spent so long on this, it was very tedious reading 'sundress' or 'dress' every other word.
Another thing that I find tedious is Golden spending so much time on these - literal - throw away characters. This was something that the show never really did - in fact, I can only remember one time they did this, and it was with a character that they had actually introduced earlier in the episode. Everything that happened in these two chapters could have been condensed to one chapter, if the events of the boat, the girl on the beach, the scuba guys and Baker had been seen as a reaction through the main cast, rather than in the their own POV. It seems Golden went to the Dickensian school of writing - he gets paid by the word, lol.
But all of this just added up to two very boring chapters, which I think I remember from my first time reading it.
The only interesting bit about this - and I use that term loosely - was the scene with Spike.