Okay, so you think Willow was confused because she didn't understand the Kinsey scale, I think it's more likely that she had no intention of ever dating males again once she came out as a gay woman. Since the Kinsey scale is not mentioned and no character from BTVS ever mentions where they lie on a sexual spectrum we'll never know what they think about that individually, or whether it's even relevant in their universe. I don't recall any of them mentioning Chile Rellanos, either, it's possible Riley formed an addiction to them and Sam was simply his handler masquerading as his wife to keep him from eating delicious Mexican food when they came back to Sunnydale. It's never stated and Riley could have been unwilling to go into detail about hot peppers which prevented him from having an on screen discussion of the truth and leaving us with his plausible, simple, but ultimately unsatisfying, explanation.But likewise we aren't shown anything that calls into question that he attraction and relationship with Oz was lacking whilst there some that Willow has attraction to some men. It makes more sense to me from what I'm watching that Willow is a bisexual with a preference for women than that she's gay who went with men because of societal pressure. I think you're projecting and I'm sure that happens to some people but sexual orientation is an arc with a lot variation in it. Sometimes people who think they're het find someone of their own gender who they click with and/or who does it for them and sometimes the opposite happens. Love and sex are complicated things sometimes more than we realise ourselves.