Jill_Valentine
Sacred and Profane
It has come to my attention that many people are...confused about their Identity. Thats understandable. Many of us are still enduring the whirlwind of hormones that is teenagerdom. But one question seems to recur. "Am I a nerd?" you ask. Well, the good news is that Nerds have come to be an almost entirely accepted part of society. We still have a long way to go, but I feel that we have come on in leaps and bounds since the mid nineties, when the Tokyo Nerd riots dominated the headlines.
Many people feel pressure to hide any semblance of Nerdism. This is sad, and artificial, but many feel more content around family and friends is the truth about them is unknown. Many people say they are Nerds just to get attention. Many people are unsure themselves. Ultimately, it's you thats important. You must learn to become comfortable, and confident with your identity before you can expect other people to this end, I and the rest of the Allied Nerd Acceptance League have devised the following test. One point for each "yes", unless otherwise stated.
1) Did you spot the above acronym?
2) Is your web name always the same? Bonus point if it belongs to a fictional character. Point for every character name you have ever used.
3) Have you reached the point where you could use an off topic avatar? Bonus point if you do.
4) Have you got a picture in your signature? Bonus point if it's something you photoshopped yourself.
5) Do people ask you for help with computers?
6) Do you sometimes watch movies and TV in the hope that you can subliminally influence others in the household to watch them too?
7) Do you own a movie or TV show on both DVD and VHS?
8) Do you know who Shigeru Myamoto is? Bonus point if you refer to him as "Shigsy"
9) Do you know Neo's room number? 2 bonus points if you know Trinity's.
10) Do you often quote from movies and TV, and hope that nobody will notice? Bonus point if you secretly hope that they will.
11) Have you ever written fanfiction? Bonus point for Darkfic, 2 points each for Slash- and song- fic.
12) 1 point for each of the following that you own for personal use: Webcam, ergonomic keyboard, pen-and-tablet mouse, computer microphone, cd burner, headset, handheld scanner, DVD burner, CD label printer.
13) Do you find yourself mentally noting movie innacuracies to dazzle web-buddies later on?
14) 5 points if you know Mulders badge number.
15) Did you read Lord of the Rings before the movie was ever mentioned?
16) 1 point for every games console you have ever owned.
17) Do you own, or have you ever owned, more than 15 games for the Pc not including expansions?
18) Do you refer to certain actors by first name only?
19) Are you bitter about the popularity of the Playstation?
20) Do you know what a "Wonderswan" is?
21) Is a forum the highlight of your day?
22) Do you highlight things in the TV guide?
23) Can you set your VCR timer? Bonus point if you have ever stayed up to watch it anyway.
24) Do you regularly use the internet past midnight?
25) Have you ever bought a magazine from the Visual Image range? If its Xpose, I got letters printed in it...muhaha.
26) Have you ever bought more than one in any line of comics?
27) Are you frequently frustrated that you can't type fast enough to keep up with your head?
28) Did you laugh hysterically at the Run Dos Run joke in the Simpsons?
29) Have you ever waited for a video game for more than 3 weeks before its release date?
30) Do you ever get an adrenaline rush in a chatroom?
31)Have you ever caught yourself internally narrating your own life?
32) 1 point for every Emulator you have. 2 points if you own more than 15 Roms for any one of them.
33) 1 point for every Magazine subscription you have.
(EXCEPTIONS: Playboy but not other porn; Readers Digest; Time,Newsweek. 5 points for National Geographic.)
34) Have you ever built one of the following: Model ships/ planes, diorama, Warhammer-style army game thing.
35) Do you try to buy things you see in movies? (eg. Swooshy coats, boots, phones, shades, lenses, replica weapons, books) Bonus point if you've only just realised it.
36) 1 point for every movie/tv poster you own. Two points if its a Lobby Edition. 3 points for a carboard stand up.
37) Did you assemble your computer system youself?
38) Have you ever laughed hysterically at Dilbert?
39) One point for every foodstuff you have ever laugh-snorted. ("Snorking")
40) Have you ever owned a Gary Larson calender? Bonus point if you got more that 95% of the jokes.
Add 'em up and...
20 or lower.
Your pretty normal, but much like Jane Goodall, nerds accept you as their own. You are welcome here, and the Nerds respect you. It is your duty to tell the world about their strange and superior ways...
20-35
You're a half-breed. Neither socially inept enough for full Nerd status, nor sufficiently bland for normality. You could go either way. You can try to hide it, but fellow Nerds recognise you, just as Norms are subconsciously distressed by your presence. Face up to who you are. Claim an identity soon, or be trapped in limbo forever.
35-45
One of our own. Respected and respectful to your nerdy brethren, you see no shame in it. You are aware that Nerds live full and healthy lives, outside of their Nerdy pursuits, but you are still happiest among your own. We are legion. We are every 8th person you see walking down the street. We program your computers, criticise and make your movies, and are inexplicably not evicted from Big Brother. Do not fear us. We can live in harmony.
45+
God in heaven. You probably haven't willingly been outside since childhood. You reject the sun, and all who walk in her loathsome rays. You are never happier than when flaunting some obscure but perhaps interesting fact. The thing is, you will soon develop long tendrils instead of fingers, the better to type with, and your eyes will adapt to square screen shapes, until you physically couldn't live among Norms if you wanted to. Come back from the brink before you bore everybody to tears! Just ...ease up a little okay?
Many people feel pressure to hide any semblance of Nerdism. This is sad, and artificial, but many feel more content around family and friends is the truth about them is unknown. Many people say they are Nerds just to get attention. Many people are unsure themselves. Ultimately, it's you thats important. You must learn to become comfortable, and confident with your identity before you can expect other people to this end, I and the rest of the Allied Nerd Acceptance League have devised the following test. One point for each "yes", unless otherwise stated.
1) Did you spot the above acronym?
2) Is your web name always the same? Bonus point if it belongs to a fictional character. Point for every character name you have ever used.
3) Have you reached the point where you could use an off topic avatar? Bonus point if you do.
4) Have you got a picture in your signature? Bonus point if it's something you photoshopped yourself.
5) Do people ask you for help with computers?
6) Do you sometimes watch movies and TV in the hope that you can subliminally influence others in the household to watch them too?
7) Do you own a movie or TV show on both DVD and VHS?
8) Do you know who Shigeru Myamoto is? Bonus point if you refer to him as "Shigsy"
9) Do you know Neo's room number? 2 bonus points if you know Trinity's.
10) Do you often quote from movies and TV, and hope that nobody will notice? Bonus point if you secretly hope that they will.
11) Have you ever written fanfiction? Bonus point for Darkfic, 2 points each for Slash- and song- fic.
12) 1 point for each of the following that you own for personal use: Webcam, ergonomic keyboard, pen-and-tablet mouse, computer microphone, cd burner, headset, handheld scanner, DVD burner, CD label printer.
13) Do you find yourself mentally noting movie innacuracies to dazzle web-buddies later on?
14) 5 points if you know Mulders badge number.
15) Did you read Lord of the Rings before the movie was ever mentioned?
16) 1 point for every games console you have ever owned.
17) Do you own, or have you ever owned, more than 15 games for the Pc not including expansions?
18) Do you refer to certain actors by first name only?
19) Are you bitter about the popularity of the Playstation?
20) Do you know what a "Wonderswan" is?
21) Is a forum the highlight of your day?
22) Do you highlight things in the TV guide?
23) Can you set your VCR timer? Bonus point if you have ever stayed up to watch it anyway.
24) Do you regularly use the internet past midnight?
25) Have you ever bought a magazine from the Visual Image range? If its Xpose, I got letters printed in it...muhaha.
26) Have you ever bought more than one in any line of comics?
27) Are you frequently frustrated that you can't type fast enough to keep up with your head?
28) Did you laugh hysterically at the Run Dos Run joke in the Simpsons?
29) Have you ever waited for a video game for more than 3 weeks before its release date?
30) Do you ever get an adrenaline rush in a chatroom?
31)Have you ever caught yourself internally narrating your own life?
32) 1 point for every Emulator you have. 2 points if you own more than 15 Roms for any one of them.
33) 1 point for every Magazine subscription you have.
(EXCEPTIONS: Playboy but not other porn; Readers Digest; Time,Newsweek. 5 points for National Geographic.)
34) Have you ever built one of the following: Model ships/ planes, diorama, Warhammer-style army game thing.
35) Do you try to buy things you see in movies? (eg. Swooshy coats, boots, phones, shades, lenses, replica weapons, books) Bonus point if you've only just realised it.
36) 1 point for every movie/tv poster you own. Two points if its a Lobby Edition. 3 points for a carboard stand up.
37) Did you assemble your computer system youself?
38) Have you ever laughed hysterically at Dilbert?
39) One point for every foodstuff you have ever laugh-snorted. ("Snorking")
40) Have you ever owned a Gary Larson calender? Bonus point if you got more that 95% of the jokes.
Add 'em up and...
20 or lower.
Your pretty normal, but much like Jane Goodall, nerds accept you as their own. You are welcome here, and the Nerds respect you. It is your duty to tell the world about their strange and superior ways...
20-35
You're a half-breed. Neither socially inept enough for full Nerd status, nor sufficiently bland for normality. You could go either way. You can try to hide it, but fellow Nerds recognise you, just as Norms are subconsciously distressed by your presence. Face up to who you are. Claim an identity soon, or be trapped in limbo forever.
35-45
One of our own. Respected and respectful to your nerdy brethren, you see no shame in it. You are aware that Nerds live full and healthy lives, outside of their Nerdy pursuits, but you are still happiest among your own. We are legion. We are every 8th person you see walking down the street. We program your computers, criticise and make your movies, and are inexplicably not evicted from Big Brother. Do not fear us. We can live in harmony.
45+
God in heaven. You probably haven't willingly been outside since childhood. You reject the sun, and all who walk in her loathsome rays. You are never happier than when flaunting some obscure but perhaps interesting fact. The thing is, you will soon develop long tendrils instead of fingers, the better to type with, and your eyes will adapt to square screen shapes, until you physically couldn't live among Norms if you wanted to. Come back from the brink before you bore everybody to tears! Just ...ease up a little okay?
D
doppelgänger2
[No message]
