And I think I'll scream cause this feels absurd..

[eponinethen]

Is this the way men are supposed to be? Are men or boys allowed to be emmotional? Are men and women supposed to behave differently in our society?
Arghh, I'm so upset right now..! We had this guy at my school today, he was supposed to talk about the ways men and boys are brought up, and how it affects everything in our society today.
So, at my school we have always spoken a lot about feminism, equality between the sexes, ideals of men and women and so on.. And everyone knows a lot about it of course.
So when I talked to this guy, before the lecture/discussion, I told him that we've talked a lot about this at our school, so please try to bring up discussions that are more unusual and that aren't discussed every day. And I said please don't underesimate us, cause everyone knows a lot about this, please talk to us as you would to someone of your own age. He promised to do that.
The student who attend this lecture are from 15 to 18 years old.
And the first question he asks us is are there surtain ideals that men are supposed to live up to in our society? And no one answers to this cause.. well it's such an obvious answer so we're all wondering if we got the question right. Then he asks us if we think men have to be strong and "masculine" and if we think that men shouldn't show emotions. And some people start to say no, of course we don't... But it still feels weird to talk about this cause it's so obvious.
But during the discussion.. people start answering his stupid questions, although they've discussed this since they were kids, and probably know more about it than the guy, who's supposed to tell us about it, does. So because of the way he underestimates us, the usually really smart students pretend that they don't know about this, just to be able to have a discussion with him. And they start speaking like they've just realized that boys and girls are brought up differently, and that there are ideals and that people should just start treat everyone the same way. And this freaks me out! I almost started screaming in there cause this is so.. humiliating (don't know what other word to use).

So my question has nothing to do with feminism or if you have ever been treated a surtain way because of what sex to belong to (cause I know that eveyone has been). I'm wondering if you've been underestimated like this cause of the age you are. Do you feel like people don't take you seriously just cause you happen to be younger than they are? Do people speak to you like you have no idea what you're talking about? Do they smile at what you say just cause they don't even bother to listen..? (Have you had experiences like this one?)

 

[doppelgänger2]

Since I may look like a 16-year old to most people, I sometimes get treated like a little kid.
I can remember once at work about 6 months ago when I was supposed to fill in for somebody and I'd been working for that compay for over a year so I knew the drill, I was just a little confused cause I'd never been there before. But I had to work with this guy who treated me like a idiot just cause I didn't know everything about that place and how stuff were usually done. He treated me like a little girl and said stuff like "I can see you're a new comer" and yada yada. At the end of the day we actually had a conversation where I wasn't mentally killing him with a big ole knife and it turned out that he was like 2 years younger than me and had been working for the company for six months only. So yeah, I guess that people treat you differently when they think you're younger.
It happens to me all the time. Grown ups who don't believe that I'm 20 years old and think I know nothing about anything. That really bugs me. I have a friend who's like doubble my age but still treats me like an equal. That's not common, what I've experienced.

 

[Lethe]

I always feel that way, it seems. There have been times when I go onto chatrooms on Wicca and the such (I'm Wiccan) and all the Elders there start telling me I don't belong because I'm not as skilled as they.
Then there are others where people are the exact opposite and they fear me and my pentacle neckalce. Both of those though, are preferable to sexism.
I've had the kind where I apparently can't run because...I'm a girl. Shocker. Then, worse still is the eyes away from face judgement. When guys can't seem to really raise their chins enough to meet my eyes - their eyes linger a little south of my collar bone.

 

[polexia]

jepp! like i was haveing a discution with my father-in law this summer, and he was kinda petronicing(sp?? kinda talking down to me..) (he wasn't that bad though, but he sorta had that tone in some of his words...) but it has happened other times as well... it's so annoying! cause you haven't passed 25 doesn't mean your not smart, or have opinions or know how to word your self in a great way.. man i've met 16 year olds who could do that.

 

[Hero]

I'm a little bit confused as to your first post.

Are men supposed to show emotions: I do. Is that bad?
Are men supposed to be masculine: I'm not. Is that bad?

Like, I'm kinda confused about what the topic is supposed to be about. Are we discussing if you're not taken seriously because of your are or are we supposed to talk about how men and women are supposed to act? Sorry, I'm just...dumb...lol

 

[eponinethen]

The thing is.. when people speaks to me that way.. Well, sometimes I feel like I don't exist and I start questioning myself maybe they're right, maybe I really don't know anything about this. But most of the time I just get mad. I get really really mad and start arguing, cause I hate it when people treat me like this, cause I do know what I'm talking about!... But in situations like the one I mentioned above, I don't even feel like answering at all, cause it's so obvios I know a lot more than they do.. So why should I even bother to talk to them if they just consider me to be a stupid kid (I too happen to look even younger than I am)..? Anyway I still feel really bad about things like this.. Hate it..

I'm a little bit confused as to your first post.

Are men supposed to show emotions: I do. Is that bad?
Are men supposed to be masculine: I'm not. Is that bad?

Like, I'm kinda confused about what the topic is supposed to be about. Are we discussing if you're not taken seriously because of your are or are we supposed to talk about how men and women are supposed to act? Sorry, I'm just...dumb...lol

Sorry if I wasn't clear about this. I was really upset and tired when I wrote this thread.
We're not discussing how men or women are supposed to act, that's the one thing we're not disussing.
I was trying to say that I have discussed that topic too many times and I know a lot about it and I just hate it when someone comes to our school and tries to tell us you know children, men and women are actually treated differently in our society. I hate it when people who have just discovered feminism think they have come up with a new thought. And I hate it when people don't realize they have nothing new to tell, they're just saying the same thing over and over again.
We were treated like we didn't know what we were talking about, just cos we happened to be young and students.

(And, what's even more irritating, is that my really smart fellow students started acting like this was the first time they discussed this. They started pretending they had never heard these thougths before although we've been talking about it since forever.)