Anya Quotage

Well, I'm not sure I'm gettin this completley right but hey:

Xander: A watched customer never buys.
Anya: They would if they were patriotic.
Xander (to Willow): Okay, I'm going in. (Then to Anya) Patriotic?
Anya: Yes. I've recently come to realize there's more to me than just being human. I'm also an American.
Giles: Yes, I suppose you are, in a matter of speaking. You were born here "” your mortal self.
Anya: Well, that's right, foreigner!. So I've been reading a lot about the good ol' us of a, embracing the extraordinarily precious ideology that's helped to shape and define it.
Willow: Democracy?
Anya: Capitalism. A free market dependent on the profitable exchange of goods for currency. A system of symbiotic beauty apparently lost on these old people. Look at 'em "” perusing the shelves, undressing the merchandise with their eyeballs. All ogle, no cash. It's not just annoying, it's un-American.
Giles: Appalling. Almost as if they no longer think money can buy happiness.
Anya: Totally un-American. Oh, and you know what else is un-American? French people.
Willow: You don't say?
Anya: From what I hear, they don't tip. Now, French old people, that's really the bottom of the barrel, you know?

The foreigner part cracks me up so bad! Gotta love er!
 
Heres a couple of my fave I like anya quotes in season 4.

I love this scene from "Hush"

X: How could you say I'm using you?
A: You don't care about what I think, you don't ask about my day.
X: You really did turn into a real girl, didn't you?
A: See? You make jokes during my pain.
A: Well, I think we should talk about it now.
G: Thank you for knocking.
A: This isn't a relationship. You don't need me. All you care about is lots of orgasms.
X: Okay, remember how we talked about private conversations? How they're less private when they're in front of my friends?
S: Oh, we're not your friends. Go on.
G: Please don't.
G: I need you to take Spike for a few days.
X: What?
S: What?
A: What?
S: I'm not stayin' with him.
G: I have a friend who's coming to town, and I'd like us to be alone.
A: Oh, you mean an orgasm friend?
G: Yes, that's exactly the most appalling thing you could have said.

Something Blue:

X: Jeeze. You mean Oz just sent for his stuff and didn't even call her? That's pretty harsh.
A: I only wish I had my powers back. I'd liquify his entrails for her.
X: That's sweet.

B: No big? Anybody remember when Buffy had the fun beer fest and went one million years B.C.?
X: Sadly, without the fuzzy bikini.
A: Off topic, Xander.

X: Something about Willow and her griefy "poor me" mood swings. So, so tired of it.
A: You mean I don't have to be nice about her anymore?

Fear itself

X: I can't say seeing you falls into the realm of a bad thing.
A: Really? I thought maybe we could go out tonight. For our anniversary.
X: Anniversary?
A: It's been exactly one week since we copulated.

X: You'll need a costume.
A: A costume?
X: Dress up. You know, something scary.
A: Scary? scary how?
X: Anya, you, ex-demon, terrorized mankind for centuries. I'm sure you'll come up with something.

A: What?
X: That's your scary costume?
A: Bunnies frighten me.

The I in team

A: What a stupid game. All these rules just to win little plastic discs.
X: Chips. They're called chips. They represent money, since none of us has any money to represent money.
W: You know how it it with a spanking-new boyfriend.
A: Yes, we've enjoyed spanking.
X: < loses his cards >

A: Xander, you haven't been paying any attention to me tonight. Just peddling those processed food bricks. I don't know why.
X: Well, let me put it in a way you'll understand. Sell bars, make money, take Anya nice places, buy pretty things.
A: That does make sense. All right, I support you. Go sell more.

G: I don't know how many more ways I can say, I'm not interested.
X: Try one. Check these flavors: Cherry Berry, Maple Walnut, ooh, Almond Licorice.
A: Eww.
X: Anya, we don't say "Eww" in front of potential customers.
A: Just skip this part and tell him you want money to buy me pretty things. He'll understand.
G: Very well. Maple Walnut.
X: An excellent choice.
G: < takes bite, grimaces > Please leave my home now.
 
Anya in the dream of Giles during "restless" is trying to tell a joke on stage.
She begins it and from a person in the crowd you can hear "You suck"
Anya then blurts out, "Quiet. You'll miss the humorous conclusion"
 
I always laugh at the beginning of the scene near the beginning of "Tabula Rasa" where the four who resurrected Buffy are sitting around the table in Xander's apartment and clueless Anya comes out with

Do you think she walked around on clouds wearing-like-Birkenstocks and played a harp? Because those are just not flattering-you know-the clonky sandals, not a harp. I mean-who doesn't look good with a harp? What? I'm just saying what everyone else is thinking! (To Xander: )Right baby?
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And Willow's sitting there across from her looking like she's about to explode! And of course it's hilarious when Anya starts conjuring all the bunnies.

The play between Anya and Willow was great throughout the latter seasons of the show. They got off to such a bad start in "Doppelgangland" - it's so funny when Willow takes her swing at her in the Bronze (slo-mo shows a sheepish grin on Anya's face just before the punch lands, lol.) It often seems like they can barely stand each other, Xander was probably the only reason they held managed to hold together. S5 "Triangle" was a funny episode too. It's interesting that the two played their characters this way, because Emma Caulfield and Alyson Hannigan are great friends off the set (according to AH herself).
 
There are too many to name.

Anya: Willow's a demon?!?

ANYA: Oh, crap. Look at this! Now I'm burdened with a husband and several tiny pink children, more cash than I can reasonably manage...

XANDER: That means you're winning.

ANYA: Really?

XANDER: Yes. Cash equals good.

ANYA: Ooh! (claps her hands in excitement) I'm so pleased. Can I trade in the children for more cash?

ANYA: I have finesse! I have finesse coming out of my bottom! I can *completely* lie to the health inspector, I can, ya know, distract him with coy smiles and bribe him with money *and* goods!

And my personal fave:

ANYA: That's so very humorous. Make fun of the ex-demon! I can just hear you in private. (talks to the chicken foot) 'I dislike that Anya. She's newly human and strangely literal.'

WILLOW: (frowns) Anya, I don't say that. No one says that. No one talks that way.
 
From Barganing Part One ANYA: Y-you wanna look at the money? I find it always calms me.

From Barganing Part Two ANYA: (getting agitated) They could be hurt. Xander could be lying somewhere broken and bleeding, calling out my name.
TARA: Anya.
ANYA: Like that, oh god!
From Barganing Part Two
ANYA: Plus, we have a Slayer here, uh, who might actually be looking to eat some brains, so, I think a little quiet moseying, no hard feelings, and I'm sure your demon horde won't think any the less of you.
From Barganing Part Two
RAZOR: Whoa. Well, I better back off, or you might, what? Pull a rabbit out of a hat?
ANYA: (horrified) Don't, don't do that! (to Tara) Why would she do that? (Tara shakes her head)


I love anything to do with Bunnies. These are a few.
 
I know it was really early in the piece but the Anya lines that always springs to mind with me is...

The Prom
Anya: You know, you can laugh, but I have witnessed a millenium of treachery and oppression from the males of the species and I have nothing but contempt for the whole libidinous lot of them.
Xander: Then why you talking to me?
Anya: I don't have a date for the prom.
Xander: Well gosh. I wonder why not. It couldn't possibly have anything to do with your sales pitch?
Anya: Men are evil. Will you go with me?
Xander: One of us is very confused, and I honestly don't know which.

:lmao:
 
My favorite is

Buffy: Well I figured it was just me, you know, like I was going crazy?
Anya: Maybe you are going crazy...from hell (Willow shoots her a look) Nah...you're fine.
 
From Sleeper...when she's snuck into Spike's room to see if he's evil.

SPIKE: Anya, do be specific and tell a fellow just exactly what you're doing here.
ANYA: Well, Spike... I'm here, obviously... for...um...sex.
SPIKE:Uh, beg pardon.
ANYA: You and me. Here and now. Let's go. Let's... get it on, you big bad boy.
SPIKE: Wait, wait, Anya. Just a minute. This is not exactly - is that a stake?
ANYA: Yes. Kinky.
SPIKE: Uh, well, yeah, but what do you - ?
ANYA: Shh. No questions. No talking. I can't help it. I can't stop thinking about you and us and our brief but unforgettable time together. I mean, it's - why else would I be here? I mean, it's not like I'm snooping around looking for proof that you're some sort of wacked out serial killer. I don't know why I said that. Forget I said that. It's craziness talking. It's just nerves. Nerves. Nerves and-and horniness. Oh, just shut up, William, and take me. Take me now.
...
SPIKE: Anya.
ANYA: Hmm?
SPIKE: It's not that I'm not tempted. Obviously, if things were different, you're a ripe catch.
ANYA: I got it. No problem, I understand. (beat) You think I'm fat.
SPIKE: What?
ANYA: Well, it's either that or the haircut.
SPIKE: Ridiculous. The do's quite fetching.
ANYA: Oh, right. Now you like the haircut.
SPIKE: Love it.
ANYA: Sure, as a friend.
SPIKE: Anya.
ANYA: You know, you were a lot more fun when you didn't have a soul.
SPIKE: Oh, come on. Now, I've just explained to you -
ANYA: All I'm saying is soulless Spike would have had me upside down and half way to happy land by now.
SPIKE: I need my pants.

:lmao:
 
Anya's the funniest I don't care what anyone says! From Real Me:

Anya: Can I exchange the children for more money?

I think it goes like that, but that was always the funniest of hers for me. 😀
 
Mango said:
Oh my god!! Anya is like the funniest character and she has had so many great quotes. My faves are:

Andrew: "Entertaining and educating."
Anya: "Why can't you just masturbate like the rest of us?"

Xander: "I got friends on the line."
Anya: "So?"

Anya: "Fine. You know what? I hope you die. (Xander walks away) Aren't we gonna kiss?"

LMAO!!
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phoenixrising said:
My favorite is not the funniest thing she ever said, but rather the most human.

' I don't understand how this all happens. How we go through this. I mean, I knew her, and then she's, there's just a body, and I don't understand why she just can't get back in it and not be dead anymore. It's stupid. It's mortal and stupid. And, and Xander's crying and not talking, and, and I was having fruit punch, and I thought, well, Joyce will never have any more fruit punch ever, and she'll never have eggs, or yawn or brush her hair, not ever, and no one will explain to me why.'

With every sad thing that happens in 'The Body', no matter how many times I watch it, this always make me cry.
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Those are my favorites along with


"I, Anya, want to marry you, Xander, because I love you, and I'll always love you. And before I knew you, I was like a completely different person. Not even a person, really...and I had seen what love could do to people, and it was hurt...and sadness. Alone was better. And then, suddenly, there was you, and you knew me. You saw me, and it was this...thing. You make me feel safe, and warm. So I get it now. I finally get love, Xander. I really do. "
- Anya

"I think we died in this car on the way to the airport and now were stuck in hell" -Anya
 
haha I love all her quotes! ^-^

I can't remember how it went but I love the one about the chexmix and how its craftsmanship! Lol, priceless!!

Or, this:

ANYA: Gimme a beer

WAITOR: Id

ANYA: Gimme a beer!

WAITOR: Id.

ANYA: I'm eleven hundred and forty years old just give me a friggin' beer!

WAITOR: Id

ANYA: Gimme a coke
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Anya: "Very humorous. Make fun of the ex-demon. I can just hear you in private: 'I dislike that Anya. She is newly human and strangely literal'."

and

Anya: "God! Who would put something like that there! Is this supposed to be some sort of sick joke? As if things aren't bad enough!... This is an omen."
Xander: "Sshhh."
Anya: "No, no, no, it's an omen. It's a higher power telling me through bunnies that we're all gonna die!"
 
Anya can make me cry from laughter. Those writers are pure genius when it comes to writing her.
 
If these quotes have already been discussed, my apologies;

"I was being patient but it took too long"

"Is it difficult and time consuming?"
 
That's hard... Some of my favourite quotes:

'But I don't understand! I don't understand how this all happens. How we go through this. I mean, I knew her, and then she's, there's just a body, and I don't understand why she just can't get back in it and not be dead anymore! It's stupid! It's mortal and stupid! And, and Xander's crying and not talking, and, and I was having fruit punch, and I thought, well Joyce will never have any more fruit punch, ever, and she'll never have eggs, or yawn or brush her hair, not ever, and no one will explain to me why."

"No, no, no, it's an omen. It's a higher power telling me through bunnies that we're all gonna die"

Anya: What a day. Gimme a beer.
Bartender: I.D....I.D.
Anya: I'm eleven hundred and twenty years old! Just gimme a frickin' beer!
Bartender: I.D.
Anya: Gimme a Coke.

"No, I mean it's a myth that it's a myth. There is a Santa Claus."

"What kind of lesbians are you? If you love men so much, go love men!!"

And a lot more
 
"Your roar is less than full-throated. Even the other trolls are put off by your various odors!"

I like all her interactions with Olaf in Triangle and Selfless, plus her interactions with the troll that she used to date who lets them in to see Beljox's eye in season 7.

To Giles: "you're getting ripped off. I can hook you up direct with the troll that shits it."

You know i'm only doing this because i'm drunk and lonely and you smell really good.

For centuries i wrought bloody vengeance on men who deserved it. And now i've lost my powers. Mortal. A child. And i'm flunking math.
 
OMG Anya has so many good quotes!!

"I gave birth to a pterodactyl" (excuse the spelling 🙂 )
"oh my god did it sing" ~ Only Anya would say that lol!

This one is less funny and more sort of cute,

And they have no purpose that unites them, so they just drift around, blundering through life until they die. Which they know is coming and yet every single one of them is surprised when it happens to them. They're incapable of thinking about what they want beyond the moment. They kill each other, which is clearly insane, and yet, here's the thing. When it's something that really matters, they fight. I mean, they're lame morons for fighting. But they do. They never... They never quit. And so I guess I will keep fighting, too.

and

Anya: Oh, God. I'm terrified. I-I didn't think - I mean, I - I just figured you'd be terrified, and I would be sarcastic about it.
Andrew: Picture happy things. A lake, candycanes, bunnies...
Anya: [enraged] Bunnies! Floppy, hoppy, bunnies!

just one more 🙂

Buffy: Willow, you're a gay woman, and he isn't.
Willow: This isn't about his physical presence, it's about his heart.
Anya: His physical presence has a penis.
Willow: I can work around it.

(I think it's all three of them that make the last one work 😀 soo funny!!)
 
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