Ha, it's still a big mystery to this day whether the tabloids of DB and SMG being a real item circa 1998-1999 are true or not. There is a ton of photos and stories of them being very cozy with each other, both on and off set. SMG is sitting right on his lap half the time. SMG has outright admitted that she was crushing on both David and Angel alike. The feelings seemed to have been very much there on her side at the very least. How much of it was the WB creating buzz in the tabloids and how much was real kinda is one of the biggest BTS mysteries of the show. Some of the rumors state they may have gone out on a few dates, but just ultimately stayed friends.
He was married at the time, but well, that hasn't always stopped David. SMG even commented on his first marriage being "not made in heaven" and there were a bunch of tabloids saying Ingrid was crashing the set because she suspected DB and SMG were an item. When asked about the DB rumors, she denied in that one interview of them being seen eating at a healthy restaurant together by noting that she's never seen him eat anything that wasn't deep fried (LOL). We do know DB and Seth went out to NYC for SNL with her and she was also photographed clubbing with DB with her arms looped around him. They were also kissing on the red carpet and always together at events. They were always super touchy-feely. This is also the same SMG that denied that she was even dating Freddie when she definitely was, so she has always been tight-lipped.
And of course, it was SMG who wanted DB at the 20th with her and talked him into going. Whatever happened, they're still super comfortable with each other, even to the point of them crashing poolside family vacations, her noting their kids are of similar age (the daughters) and her lunching with him on the Bones set during The Crazy Ones.
She took all of the Bangel scenes very personally and took the emotional demons home with her. She was really invested in the emotions of the early years. She shut down the set twice in The Prom and IWRY because she was so distraught and was getting hugged in between takes to comfort her when David had to act out the harsh Angelus bedroom scene in Innocence. You can also see David so very sweetly encouraging SMG to keep going through the IOHEFY possession scene (he also makes her laugh with his "wops" blooper), while she's telling him she's so tired (shot in the middle of the night). He was her most trusted person on set. SMG has had a persistent hard-to-work-with reputation for a long time (her Helpless outtakes are really bad, admittedly), but we always hear about how David was the one person who could calm her down when she was crying and could also make her laugh. Then we also have that infamous interview of Alyson saying that SMG stopped caring about the show after season 3, which had to be walked back when it caused a 'shipper shitstorm.
SMG had a yucked out reaction to James saying he saw her as his little sister, which made their romance scenes very uncomfortable (James is also 15 years older, whereas David was only 8). JM loved doing romantic scenes with Juliet Landau! So much so that his one-time girlfriend got jealous and said David was better looking, which actually made James jealous of David and it created a lot of the rivalry between them that he used! JM was really wigged about having to lick SMG's shoulder (season 7) and it was because it felt like he was licking his sister. And of course, SMG hated the degrading sex scenes. When she did the infamous magazine interview where she quit, she even specified the degrading sex scenes in season 6 as what really turned her off from the show. SMG and JM liked each other, but they really weren't into their romantic scenes.
One thing is for certain is that DB and SMG were very comfortable with each other and he seems to have also been protective of her on set (that story of her getting sexually harassed on set and DB and JM getting angry enough about it that they discussed beating the guy up, but didn't). I kinda wonder now about the new revelations of Joss using his power over his actresses with a casting couch. I dare say that SMG was too busy mooning over DB (reciprocated or not, she had an admitted crush) for Joss to have gotten anywhere (and boy, did he get an inferiority complex about DB and JM's looks about how good they had it--even said it to JM's face about him getting laid easier and straight-up compared DB to the sort of jocks who bullied him). And we know both SMG and DB were actors of his stable he really didn't get along with. He's been known to pettily dump on both of their characters. They were also solid no-shows at the Shakespeare readings and never in Joss' clique. CC (understatement) and her bestie Julie Benz have also commented on not really getting along with Joss. Joss also hated Tim Minear when he first met him, but ultimately hired him for talent. Joss really has a reputation for being an ass.
But anyway, speculation aside, it's plainly obvious that SMG absolutely lights up anytime she's with DB. She has utter love and adoration in her eyes. After years of her not looking that way at any of her next costars, it's quite telling when it suddenly comes back again. She couldn't even be bothered to advertise the Briley relationship while it was happening, whereas she gushed over Bangel and David every chance she got. SMG just kind of looks like she's "going through the motions" through a lot of the last seasons in general and she looks really dead-eyed and tired in a lot of season 7. Even the Spuffy scenes are like that. JM and SMG had a hell of a time with the Hellmouth "I love you" because the actors didn't actually believe it was true, no matter how much Joss wanted it to be. Neither actor believed it was more than comforting words that Spike was right to deny.
The reason for JM's head tilts, by the way, was because he was focused on not blocking SMG's light with his big head. It was a purely technical thing. Their romance scenes tended to just be a lot of technical things. JM even has talked about how he was just thinking about the technical how-tos of acting during it all. And this is by a Method actor (he also got taken out of the moment, because SMG is NOT a Method actor and would go back to being herself after every take, whereas Juliet Landau also is). Not exactly a description of passion, is it?
One thing I always notice is that JM just mashes his mouth against her roughly in all their kissing scenes (only the Intervention kiss has any tenderness, IMO). Not much tenderness or soft, sweet, affectionate kisses at all. DB and SMG, on the other hand, weren't even doing the fake Hollywood kissing that is taught to actors that you see so often (kissing above and below the mouth, rather than right on it). DB, in particular, just seems to have gone for the real thing, rather than anything actorly, and his kissing scenes always come across as authentic because of it (Eliza Dushku had the same idea, getting her tongue stabbed on his fangs and all). SMG even commented on him being the best kisser of any of the actors she's had to work with. The weird thing is, SMG didn't even want JM kissing her the real way (she actually told him to do it the fake way), yet she sure didn't seem to mind when DB did it so obviously for real. DB was even sneaking his tongue in during the kisses in 1x07 and the Surprise love scene (visible, especially in HD with the lights on). They also have the noticeable spit trail in IOHEFY. One thing you'll also notice with DB and SMG is that they just can't stop smiling at each other in a lot of their kissing scenes! They're always smiling at each other with affection!
This sort of explains what the Spuffy kisses really were like for the actors and I think it shows:
James Marsters said:
(6-02 SFX Event) To tell you the truth, I don't know! Because it's very different kissing someone acting wise. This is something Sarah taught me actually. There was a kiss where the camera came around the Bronze and all these people were in liplock. It was at the end of the episode where we lost our memory. And we had to do that like 12 times because I kept kissing for real and our lips were like (makes smashing lips face). Sarah kept trying to explain that it's like stunts - you gotta be very careful to take yourself out of it. You don't hit for real - it's fake and you make it look real. So I wish I could answer your question - you don't know how bad. (giggles)
(6-03 Company Magazine) Film kissing is a whole different bag. You can do a lot of disservice to your leading lady by kissing her for too long. When I first kissed Sarah, I bit her. She was a bit shocked. And sex scenes are even more awkward - you're standing there in nothing but a sock for 18 hours! There's no getting around the fact that you're the only naked person in a room full of your friends - it's the stuff of nightmares. Everyone's had that dream where they turn up to work naked, but it's my job to show up that way every day.
(10-03 Chaos Bleeds comments) A screen kiss is a very different thing than a real kiss. You're often concentrating so hard in trying to get your light in your eyes and not get in her light and then not making your lips go all crazy and messed up and stuff and so it's really technical. It's a lot actually like stunts. I don't know what it would be like to really fight with Sarah and I also really don't know what it would be like to kiss her. I really haven't really kissed her. That's not really what people want to hear, but it's the truth. You know, it's like kissing my sister. It's weird. Sarah and I have -- She's like my kid sister and we're good friends and we get along really well.
(5-05 Collectormania) Juliet. Sarah I respect, I like her a lot, she's like a sister to me, but going through 17 hour days, it's like war, and the enemy is time, and in order to work with Sarah and enjoy myself, I put her into the psychological category of my little sister who drives me crazy sometimes, but I love her anyway. And then they made me kiss her, and that was weird, so I have to say, some of those scenes are hot and everything, but I'm thinking, 'I'm kissing my sister.' But Juliet is the same kind of actor I am, which is nothing is too far for her. Her commitment level is absolutely off the charts, just like mine, so I always felt there was a part of my character that I couldn't get to without her on the set. All the really nasty bits, all that stuff never really happened without her on the set. Juliet Landau, she's a great actor.
