Best Parental Figure?

sisterofmercy

Ray of Sunshine..
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Who do you think was the best mother/father figure in Buffy and Angel?

What are the main strengths and weaknesses of the parental figures in the Buffyverse?
 
Professor Walsh
Professor Walsh
Good thread. I'll sleep on that and come back if I find time between teaching and parenting :-)
Giles. Buffy wasn't even his daughter, but she saw him like her father, and he saw her like his daughter. That's why the Council fired Giles. Their relationship wasn't a watcher-slayer relationship anymore. He was always there for her and always thought he did what's best for her. Again, and he wasn't even her real father.
 
I'm finding it very hard to think of a character who parented in a way that I admired. I'll have to think about this and come back.
 
S
sisterofmercy
Which is why this thread also asks about weaknesses :p
^ Yes, there is actually a distinct lack of parenting in the series.

Very much so. Even the "ideal parents" such as Joyce and Giles, parented in some truly appalling ways, in my opinion.

I can appreciate the style of Angel, where he was willing to do everything he possibly could for his son and give him the best shot at life, but it is hard to admire any specific moments of Angel/Connor simply because they are all so utterly tragic.

I really don't know if there is a single parental figure, in the entire verse, that I would consider note worthy
 
Giles. Buffy wasn't even his daughter, but she saw him like her father, and he saw her like his daughter. That's why the Council fired Giles. Their relationship wasn't a watcher-slayer relationship anymore. He was always there for her and always thought he did what's best for her. Again, and he wasn't even her real father.

I agree with you to a certain extent. He was more of a father to her than Hank ever was and he did love her. He cared for her so much - i just love their relationship. Even in difficult situations which go way beyond a normal father-daughter relationship, he was there for her, guiding her as a slayer and also as a daughter.

However, no father would have left his daughter in the state she was in in Season 6.
 
Kean
Kean
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Gum Gnome33
Gum Gnome33
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dexeded
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I agree with you to a certain extent. He was more of a father to her than Hank ever was and he did love her. He cared for her so much - i just love their relationship. Even in difficult situations which go way beyond a normal father-daughter relationship, he was there for her, guiding her as a slayer and also as a daughter.

However, no father would have left his daughter in the state she was in in Season 6.

Like I said in my post: he always did what he thought was best for her. Doesn't mean he actually did the right thing. But he had his reasons, he didn't just leave her because he's a bad father figure. He actually thought he did the right thing. That shows me a good father. Because even parents make mistakes. But when they're good parents, they try to do the right thing for their children.
 
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Bexieh
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Bluebird
Bluebird
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RipperGilesFan
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To be honest I've never thought of anyone as a particularly good parental figure on the show. There were certainly parents, and I suppose they tried their best, however none of them set a particularly good example.

I've always thought that was intentional; like Joss really wanted to point out how the slayer duties made Buffy grow up fast.

If I had to pick someone, I'd say Giles. His strength was his love for Buffy and his encouragement. His weakness was seeing her as a slayer first.
 
Like I said in my post: he always did what he thought was best for her. Doesn't mean he actually did the right thing. But he had his reasons, he didn't just leave her because he's a bad father figure. He actually thought he did the right thing. That shows me a good father. Because even parents make mistakes. But when they're good parents, they try to do the right thing for their children.

While I agree that Giles is certainly one of the strongest parental figures on the show, you can't excuse his actions just because he thought it was what was best for Buffy. No one on the show ever did something thinking, "This will be really bad for my child (or person who I view as my child)." Everyone always acted with the best of intentions, if not with the best results. (Which is basically what you said.)
 
While I agree that Giles is certainly one of the strongest parental figures on the show, you can't excuse his actions just because he thought it was what was best for Buffy. No one on the show ever did something thinking, "This will be really bad for my child (or person who I view as my child)." Everyone always acted with the best of intentions, if not with the best results.

I'm not excusing his actions. I don't even agree with them. A good parent for me is a parent that wants best for their children. Giles had good intentions. If his intentions weren't good, or if he had any doubt that it's the wrong thing to do, he wouldn't have done it. Simple as that.

"This will be really bad for my child (or person who I view as my child)"-Right. And if Giles thought that, he wouldn't have been a good father when he did what he's done. But the fact that he was thinking about Buffy's best interest, because he thought that his leaving would be good for her, how's that a bad father? How can a parent who wants his best for his children can be a bad father? If he knew how it would effect her during the whole season after his leaving, her wouldn't have left. Which proves to me that he wants the best for her.
 
Angel wanted, and sincerely tried to be, a good parent to infant Connor, and if things hadn't gotten all screwed up, I think that he could have really gotten the job done properly. He failed completely with adolescent Connor, of course, but that wasn't his fault. It was just a question of circumstances far beyond his control. It did seem that he was on the way to getting a second chance toward the end of Season 5, and things looked as though they might actually be working out in IDW's "After The Fall" arc, but then the rest of that mess, followed by Twilight, and now with Angel in London and Connor (supposedly) in LA, what progress that he has made just may be fading away for lack of attention.

But as to who actually did the best job, though, even she was never actually perfect at it, I think that my vote would have to go to Joyce. She wasn't only Buffy's and Dawn's mother, she was the unofficial "mama" for Willow and Xander, and, strange as it sounds, for Spike, who shed many a tear in many a cup of hot chocolate at her kitchen table. And she even made sure that she had the little marshmallows on hand.
 
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sisterofmercy
I always loved the scenes between Spike and Joyce
I'm not excusing his actions. I don't even agree with them. A good parent for me is a parent that wants best for their children. Giles had good intentions. If his intentions weren't good, or if he had any doubt that it's the wrong thing to do, he wouldn't have done it. Simple as that.

"This will be really bad for my child (or person who I view as my child)"-Right. And if Giles thought that, he wouldn't have been a good father when he did what he's done. But the fact that he was thinking about Buffy's best interest, because he thought that his leaving would be good for her, how's that a bad father? How can a parent who wants his best for his children can be a bad father? If he knew how it would effect her during the whole season after his leaving, her wouldn't have left. Which proves to me that he wants the best for her.

I'm not saying that that makes him a bad father. I'm just saying that a lot of other people's actions could be justified the same way. For example, in Becoming, when Joyce tells Buffy not to come back if she leaves again, she thought that would make Buffy stay, which would keep her safe. She was just doing what she thought was best for her daughter, even if she didn't go about it the right way.
 
I'm not saying that that makes him a bad father. I'm just saying that a lot of other people's actions could be justified the same way. For example, in Becoming, when Joyce tells Buffy not to come back if she leaves again, she thought that would make Buffy stay, which would keep her safe. She was just doing what she thought was best for her daughter, even if she didn't go about it the right way.

And I'm not denying that part. I'm saying what you've just agreed with. That Giles is a good father. Regardless of what other people do. The thread was about best parental figure. And I'm answering that Giles was best at that. I'm not talking about other people. I just said why Giles is a good father figure. Which he is because he's willing to do what's best for his child before he thinks about what's good for himself. That says it all for me. Joyce isn't a bad parent either. Just like Giles, she makes mistakes with her child, thinking it's the right thing for her. But considering that Buffy wasn't even Giles' birth daughter, I think that gives him more points than Joyce on this one.
 
And I'm not denying that part. I'm saying what you've just agreed with. That Giles is a good father. Regardless of what other people do. The thread was about best parental figure. And I'm answering that Giles was best at that. I'm not talking about other people. I just said why Giles is a good father figure. Which he is because he's willing to do what's best for his child before he thinks about what's good for himself. That says it all for me. Joyce isn't a bad parent either. Just like Giles, she makes mistakes with her child, thinking it's the right thing for her. But considering that Buffy wasn't even Giles' birth daughter, I think that gives him more points than Joyce on this one.

Well, the more points bit is your opinion, but we certainly agree on the rest!
 
Chosen Enemy
Chosen Enemy
Well, as the English language inventor, I get to use the word 'more' whenever I want :D
Maybe the best parents were Darla and Angel, and does not escape me the irony that their two are not parents human (from death they have create a new life).

Darla sacrificed herself to give birth to his son, knowing full that after his birth, she would not even remember that it loved him.

Angel has done everything to keep the promise made to Darla. He tried all ways to save Connor and (imo) I think that ultimately he is succeeded to save his son, sacrificing his freedom for give it to Connor
 
Kairos
Kairos
Darla was everything a mother should be...so briefly.
How about Fred's parents? The Angel crew spent about five minutes around Roger and Trish and pretty much wanted them to adopt them.
 
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dexeded
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Whenever I talk about this my eyes get a bit watery...

:cry2:

Angel would have been such a great dad. Ugh! Isn't it ironic, the homicidal maniac (okay, technically Angel didn't kill anyone...the lawyers don't count...but let's not get into that!) was the best parent in the damn series...in my humble opinion 😉. He really felt as if he had nothing to lose, nothing came before Connor. I mean he wiped the kid's memory in order to...give him a better life :cry: damn it Holtz!!!!!

He was totally selfless and that's how a parent should be. Nothing comes before your child. Nothing...except maybe your sanity. Heh. Kidding. Not even that does! I would give up everything I have if it would somehow benefit my little sister. I mean no one would expect me too, seeing as she has parents, but ohhh I just love her so much. I'm really about to cry ahaha I'm nuts.
 
As far as Buffy goes I have to say Giles. I didn't watch Angel all that much so I can't really comment on that.
 
I can't think of any :/ parenting wasn't that good...

My favourite tv parent from another show is benjamin sisqo from Star trek deep space 9! 😀
 
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