Broken heart recovery?

[SlayerFest]

Stuff.your.face.

Oh my god I'm starving. I'm not sure if you're the type of person who stuffs their face when they're upset...or if you're too upset to eat. Hopefully, you're the former. I am, sometimes. If something really terrible has happened, I'm too anxious to eat. However, recently (well, during the summer...jeez feels like it was yesterday) some ridiculously stupid crap happened involving a guy I like(d), and it was just so absurd that I couldn't help but laugh...and stuff my face whilst sobbing and watching Cary Grant movies.

So yes, I say stuff your face! Or have a Buffy/AtS marathon, or write. Or you can draw...or rip up paper. I was cleaning my room the other day and I was so ticked off that I just started ripping up old paper and it felt so.good. Listening to music is also the biggest stress reliever in the world. I'd suggest Hole.

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cH_rfGBwamc"]Violet - Hole[/ame]

 

[Washburne]

I wish you nothing but the best and I hope you know it. I'm so sorry. I know how happy you've been.

I can't say that I handled my latest break up very well and I ended up mostly dwelling and sulking on my own. Part of it being me being so reserved, untrusting and in honesty not having people I felt like turning to (the exception being the ex and that didn't really work for obvious reasons.). Distractions can be very useful but then again, it can depend on what kind of distraction it is. My biggest advice is something not to do. Easier said than done but don't try to hold your feelings/emotions in. Don't deny them, let them out. Be it by actions (without anyone gettting hurt) or talking/sharing if you have the possibility. :hug: :: red :: :: red :: :: red ::

I can't believe that this thread has been up for a whole day and nobody has suggested meaningless rebound sex...

It's a distraction and I think distractions has been the most given advice. Maybe this being a family friendly board has made some stay away from making it this specific. It sure is a common advice.

But at the end of the day, people are different, and what works for one person might be poison for others.

Spot on.

 

[Ethan Reigns]

I can't believe that this thread has been up for a whole day and nobody has suggested meaningless rebound sex...

BtVS Season 6 Episode 18: "Entropy".

Anya gets it on with Spike in the Magic Shop after being left at the altar by Xander.

Sounds like something that would cause additional difficulties. I am not judgemental about this sort of thing, just watch out for additional problems like not being able to get rid of your new partner because he thinks it means more than it does. This is in addition to the usual possibilities of disease or pregnancy. Watch out for feeling worse in the event it doesn't work.

 

[Ianigsy]

Just to clarify, it was a tongue in cheek comment which I wasn't expecting to have taken quite so seriously! (which should be fairly clear from what I added afterwards). Perhaps if I'd been posting a bit more recently people would have picked that up, but yes, this is a real life situation where somebody's emotional state is involved, so perhaps I should have been clearer to begin with.

 

[kittenpoker]

Love you Nikki! I hope you're feeling a little better each day!

 

[Sacrifice]

I'm really sorry to hear about your heartbreak 🙁 At first, I can't deal with constant reminders so I have to avoid everything and only after quite some time can I look at reminders and not feel pain but happiness that something good happened.

People will say be strong and focused, but sometimes you need to be sad and have a cry to be able to get things out your system and move on. So I definitely listen to some songs for that! In another life by The Veronica's, Almost Lover by a Fine Frenzy and Storm by Lifehouse. If you are looking for something with a more positive message then I'd suggest It's only life by Kate Voegele.

Good luck with everything 🙂

 

[Nix]

Thanks everyone 🙂

At the moment I cry when alone. I'm letting 2 of my friends watch my warehosue 13 s3 seperately from each other but both with me so i'm drowning in that at the moment. Got Halloween coming up and half term too so that should help to keep me busy. Also trying to plan for Xmas and my girl's birthday both in the same week so need planning for. Trying to avoid normal music so also listening to a lot of Christmas music at the moment as it cheers me up lol. Oh, and rebound sex is not for me so no worries there lol 😉

 

[Jod]

*Bear Hugs*
I agree with most people above... get a new interest, learn a langauge or new skill with the spare time you might have. Also 'Take It Day By Day' as thinking too much into the future can hurt sometimes. And for me personally i cnt listen to music when sad as it pushes me over the edge, but 'no emotion' films and tv shows are fab.
I hope you start to feel abit brighter soon x

 

[Wild At Heart]

Great friends, lots of fattening foods, a little alcohol & great music. Spoil yourself.

 

[Little Miss Muffet]

What works for me is just to lay in bed, listen to music and either cry or just start singing along to the angry lyrics. lol o matter what time is always your bestfriend you soon will get over it and your heart will be heald.

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NPcyTyilmYY"]Alanis Morissette - You Oughta Know (Video) - YouTube[/ame]

[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17v0s_QuZYghttp[/ame]

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HgdPXp5phNY"]Beach House: Used To Be - YouTube[/ame]

 

[Tueuse de Vampires]

I agree with Harley. In my experience, nothing makes you forget some guy as quickly as good sex with somebody else. Although, also from experience, just don't go for random strangers. The last thing you want is to sleep with someone and all the way through think of that other person and getting even more depressed - ever since that happened to me once I've become a bit more careful about these things. Usually what does work best is picking someone who you've already been attracted to and been flirty with before but stayed away because you couldn't. Also, try to be as sober as possible (not saying a glass of wine or two would hurt, just not get wasted) if you decide to go for this, because alcohol (not to mention other substances one could feel like using) make you emotionally unstable and unpredictable and that's probably not what you want in this situation.

At least that's what would help me best, distraction, but emotionally rather than just keeping busy. But at the end of the day, people are different, and what works for one person might be poison for others. I can imagine quite some people who read this will probably cringe at my advice, but honestly, I'm not saying you should definitely do this, it's just what works for me and if you feel like this might also be your thing, why not go for it.

Sooo, I just said goodbye to the man I'm in love with because he's flying to Peru next week - one way. We weren't even together, that didn't really work out that great, but I've known him long enough to also really value him as a friend, and that makes it all the harder to get over. He's one of the genuinely nices people I have ever met.

The funny thing is, reading my own advice up there, it's pretty much the furthest thing from my mind right now. I don't even want to talk to other guys, let alone touch them. I guess life is ironic like that.

 

[SinisterPledge]

I don't listen to love songs cuz that just makes it harder. I find metal and punk-rock to be the perfect medicine.

Other than that I just try to cope, take each day as it comes. Abide.

The way of the Dude.

 

[Faith]

I don't think sleeping with someone on the rebound or going out wearing a short skirt is ever the answer, neither is comfort food. Mostly because you will only end up with some form of regret be it for the casual sex or the extra calories and that is added emotions you don't really want or need.

Knowing what I do about Nix I don't think these are avenues that she would go down anyway. The best thing is to concentrate on what you do have. You have your friends and you have your daughter. The holidays are coming up so thinking making this year a special one for the both of you should help you with distracting yourself.

 

[EffyStonem]

I've found from personal experience that no matter how much advice people give you, ultimately you need to figure out what's going to work for you. Whether it's booze, sex, friends, chocolate, doing something crazy or just sitting alone and watching sad movies, do whatever makes you feel better. Don't feel pressured to try things simply because people are suggesting them and don't ever feel guilty for whichever method you choose to use. Remember that there is no time limit and hopefully your friends and family will remember that too. I know sometimes I have felt guilty for not being able to move on quickly. Don't ever let yourself or anyone else judge you for how much/how little time you need.

Broken hearts are horrible and very painful to go through. I guess the best I can offer is the cliche that it will get better with time.

 

[kittenpoker]

I've found from personal experience that no matter how much advice people give you, ultimately you need to figure out what's going to work for you. Whether it's booze, sex, friends, chocolate, doing something crazy or just sitting alone and watching sad movies, do whatever makes you feel better. Don't feel pressured to try things simply because people are suggesting them and don't ever feel guilty for whichever method you choose to use. Remember that there is no time limit and hopefully your friends and family will remember that too. I know sometimes I have felt guilty for not being able to move on quickly. Don't ever let yourself or anyone else judge you for how much/how little time you need.

Broken hearts are horrible and very painful to go through. I guess the best I can offer is the cliche that it will get better with time.

I LOVE this!!!!!!! There's no magic one size fits all answer.