You think Buffy wasn't being a jerk or irrational? She had insulted every person in the room in Get It Done, YET everyone sucked it in and followed her. Except maybe Spike, who left because he didn't like her attitude. Makes me wonder if he'll also go against her along the others in Empty Places if he were there. Then we have her making decisions without listening to her friends' opinions, even Spike objected on her plan in Dirty Places, and she lost. Later she wanted to do the exact same plan, and everyone objected, but according to her they had to fall in line, even though they had big chances of losing again. Not to mention how she was immaturely handled herself, immaturely treating Giles and Faith in front of all the potentials like dirtbags, throwing false accusations like a five year old, stated earlier that se didn't trust any single person in the room but Spike, moreover, not even giving them the license to express their opinions and suggestions.
Tell me again, why they didn't want to follow?
In the original script, Willow and Xander were stating over and over that Buffy needed to rest, she wasn't thinking straight, and I agree with them. A Buffy who got a good night sleep will handle the situation with a rational, calm behavior that will get everyone to respect her opinion and maybe see her point. She also needed to hear suggestions and respect those working for her. Or else she's just a cold, lousy leader.
I understand that Buffy was going through a lot of pressure, her past with Faith clouds her judgment and behavior, the recent betrayal by Giles clouds her judgment and behavior, her need to win got her acting like this. I understand.
I also believe it was a good thing to suggest Buffy leaving if she couldn't work together on the situation with everybody. Just maybe not outside the house.