Buffy and Xander: Married Couple?

[sosa lola]

Lessons: Xander's responsible appearance and usage of car to drive Buffy and Dawn to school along with Buffy's mom hair and finally paying attention to Dawn. They buy her the cell phone, Buffy doesn't give it to Dawn until Xander is there, the way Buffy pulls Xander's wrest to see his watch (I loved this moment), Xander picking Dawn and Buffy to school everyday.

Beneath You: Again, Xander driving them to school, Dawn asking Buffy not to embarrass her like a daughter asks her mother. I don't blame Nancy for thinking that Buffy and Xander are together, they do act like a couple in these episodes.

Him: When Dawn embarrassed herself in front of RJ, it was Xander and Buffy who were there to comfort her. Why would Xander help Buffy comfort her when Willow was living with them? Xander comforting Dawn out of school and then when he finds Buffy on top of RJ, he goes all, "Now get off the boy, Buffy. We're going home." He is taking the father role way too seriously.

Never Leave Me: When Spike is kidnapped, it was Buffy and Xander who checked the empty basement, then it was Buffy and Xander who went upstairs and made sure Andrew was okay before they came downstairs together to check on the rest of the children…. I mean, Willow and Dawn.

Potential: Buffy and Xander are the ones making sure Dawn is okay, before Xander takes the stage and helps Dawn to be more confident about herself. He's really the father of the season.

I'm sure there are little moments here and there, but the most obvious one must be that Buffy doesn't trust anyone with Dawn but Xander. She trusted no one to go away with Dawn but Xander, if they all died, she preferred that Xander would raise Dawn alone and no one else. In Chosen, she paired Dawn with Xander, knowing that Wood and Giles are much better fighters, but she still trusted no one with her but Xander.

Then we have Buffy's role as the mother of the season by taking care of all these potentials and her friends. And on top of them all, Spike.

Icons treating Xander and Buffy as parents:

and http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v671/MoscowWatcher/Avatars2/Harris.gif

First made by adis723 and the second by Moscow Watcher

Another point that made them feel like a family was when Willow came home she felt like out of place a little. Xander/Buffy/Dawn were this little family unit and were living life with out her and she felt misplaced. Here's a screen cap showing the "Family Numbers" And has Buffy, Xander, and Dawn's number written down. Not Giles, not willow, not even her father's number, just B/X/D.

Also in Chosen, Xander was the only member of the core four trusted with Dawn despite Willow being more powerful and Giles being a better fighter. Not to mention the hand squeeze and eye staring:

made by Francy.

made by Nadia.

Now I can see why they're so close in S8. It all started in S7.

 

[MinwaraYana]

No I dont think so.

I think Buffy is Dawn's mom

Xander is Dawn's dad

But I dont think they will be married couple.

 

[Silum]

Good stuff.

I'll be honest, I always saw them as a great couple. I get that a lot of people are against this because their "such good friends", which in TV-land sorta makes sense but not in the real world. 'Such great friends' often make great romances because of how well they connect. Sure it 'ruins' friendships a lot of times when things dont work out but love has always been worth the risk...and Xander and Buffy are no different.

My only quarrel with this is that Xander became less and less likable as the seasons went on and it really became an effort to understand him at times since im not a massive Xander fan to begin with.

BUT, there were so many times when they showed how well they connected (S1-2 showed his massive crush), various episodes where he fixes the house back up, and hugs that show they at least had a spark. I think Xanders the guy Buffy will probably turn to after another 10 years of slayage when she wants to settle down.

 

[Buffyverse Fan]

I think Nick & Sarah said they thought Joss was going to eventually couple them early on in the show.

I'm going to say no at this point, since I wouldn't want to see Xander die, since Spike has his chip out...

 

[Grami]

I never noticed this before...

I think its because Xander is probably the only one of her friends who hasn't tried to kill her or Dawn ha.

 

[white avenger]

I always just thought of Xander more as comedy relief than love interest. Maybe if they had made him less of a klutz in the early episodes or toned down his attractiveness to demon ladies, which in and of itself became a running joke, I might be able to take him more seriously. As it is, when I think of Xander in those early days, I think of preying mantis demons, hyena possession, Inca mummies...well, you get the idea.

 

[sosa lola]

No I dont think so.

I think Buffy is Dawn's mom

Xander is Dawn's dad

But I dont think they will be married couple.

Being the father and mother of the season doesn't necessarily mean Buffy and Xander in a relationship. It just means they're family. I think by S7, Buffy had cut off her familial ties with Giles and Willow, and grew closer as a friend with Xander.

But, seriously, there are "married couple" vibes coming out of them.

I always just thought of Xander more as comedy relief than love interest. Maybe if they had made him less of a klutz in the early episodes or toned down his attractiveness to demon ladies, which in and of itself became a running joke, I might be able to take him more seriously. As it is, when I think of Xander in those early days, I think of preying mantis demons, hyena possession, Inca mummies...well, you get the idea.

I find Xander more complicated than just a comic relief character. I mean, I can call Anya a comic relief character in S5, but Xander tends to have serious moments more often, his short-temper, his kindness, his courage, his loyalty... etc. Episodes like Prophecy Girl, When She Was Bad, Becoming Part 1 and 2, and so many more, show him as more than just a comic relief.


If Joss wanted Xander to be Buffy's interest, he'd make him a more serious character (for example, Spike was nothing but a comic relief in S4, and once he became Buffy's love interest, they made him more serious.)

 

[MinwaraYana]

Being the father and mother of the season doesn't necessarily mean Buffy and Xander in a relationship. It just means they're family. I think by S7, Buffy had cut off her familial ties with Giles and Willow, and grew closer as a friend with Xander.

But, seriously, there are "married couple" vibes coming out of them.

Oh I got it now. 🙂 I thought you mean they will get married as in legally way. 😀

 

[sosa lola]

Oh I got it now. 🙂 I thought you mean they will get married as in legally way. 😀

Nah, I'm just saying that there are vibes, but yeah, surely not really married. 😀

 

[bigmoneygrip]

Now that you mention it, that is a neat avenue. I did have the notion that Buffy thought a lot of Xander to, as Sosa Lola mentioned 1) send Dawn away with Xander, with the idea that he would be her father presuming the worst, and 2) the climatic fight in Chosen pairing Xander with Dawn, 'cause she knew he would protect her to his last breath (ok, that was dramatic, but I'm a Xanderphile)

 

[BuffyElevated]

I have thought of it like that before... Buffy and Xander have been through hell and high water together, yet their bond keeps growing stronger and stronger and they still love each other so much. 🙂 I LOVE the icons and banners!!

 

[Big Damn Hero]

They are like a little old married couple, that don't actually have sex or anything but are really close and know each other almost inside out.

 

[sosa lola]

They are like a little old married couple, that don't actually have sex or anything but are really close and know each other almost inside out.

Yup. That sums up Buffy and Xander's relationship in S7. 🙂

HisMrs, I agree. While Buffy had been fighting with Xander more often than not, especially in S2, early S3, and late S6, theire friendship still grows stonger and stronger. He's more her best friend now in S7 than Willow.

 

[Revolver]

My only quarrel with this is that Xander became less and less likable as the seasons went on and it really became an effort to understand him at times since im not a massive Xander fan to begin with.

How so? Most of the worst stuff Xander did took place in their high school days, with perhaps a brief relapse into jerkdom in season 6 (but even that is questionable since his breaking off his engagement to Anya was more out of concern for her than anything else). In season seven though, Xander mostly comes off as having matured a great deal and is perhaps as likeable as he ever is in the series. I actually like him all the time, but I can see why he irks people in earlier episodes. But in season 7?

 

[sosa lola]

How so? Most of the worst stuff Xander did took place in their high school days, with perhaps a brief relapse into jerkdom in season 6 (but even that is questionable since his breaking off his engagement to Anya was more out of concern for her than anything else). In season seven though, Xander mostly comes off as having matured a great deal and is perhaps as likeable as he ever is in the series. I actually like him all the time, but I can see why he irks people in earlier episodes. But in season 7?

Yeah, I found Xander to be very grown up in S7, dare I say, more than Giles.

 

[Vampmogs2]

Xander was actually one of the most mature, and successful members of the Scooby gang. He was the only one who managed to buy his own place, have a successful career and offered some really great advice to everyone over the course of the series. And now in season eight he's in a role he most certainly earned, running the Scotland squad and being a major player in the slayer organisation. Xander’s the man! 😀

I don't think he was bad in earlier seasons of 'Buffy' either. The only episode I ever thought Xander was out of line in was 'Revelations' but he more than made up for that in 'Amends.' "Look I know I haven't always been the best friend to you when it comes to Angel. But hey maybe I've finally got the Hanukah spirit!"

I think 'Prophecy Girl' is one of his finest episodes in the entire series. He wouldn't give up on Buffy, even had to inspire Angel to get off his ass and fight, and he saved Buffy's life. And who could forget 'The Zeppo'? It proved Xander's worth and how great he could be when everyone around him unfairly viewed him as the least-integral part of the group.

I've always been a big fan of his character. As Buffy says, "he's her strength" and "the reason she's made it this far." His loyalty towards Buffy is un-matched, as is his courage to stand up and fight against unmeasurable odds.

I think Buffy/Xander would make a great couple. He's the kind of guy she really needs in her life.

 

[itsxpaperdoll]

I do see the old married couple thing in s7, especially when it comes to taking care of Dawn. But I don't think their very deep, loyal and good friendship will ever turn into an actual romance. What they had together (I wouldn't know about the comics, so i will stick to what I know, ie, s7), was nowhere near romantic. Partly because they both had their own love-troubles to worry about, but mostly because, I think, it was outside conditions that forced them to rely on eachother more. Giles was gone, Willow had proven to be unstable, the Xander-Anya break-up, Spike gone.. for both of them, the other was the one shoulder left to lean on. Of course, a situation like that can lead to actual romantic love, but loves that grow out of something external are in general, anyway, more spontaneous and not very long lasting. When the situation "improved", Willow came back, Giles came back, Spike came back, Anya came back, even Angel for a bit, they moved away from eachother again. There were other circumstances, but it was Spike who defended Buffy in Empty Places, not Xander. He didn't go after her, and only apologised when she came back (I think, I don't remember exactly what happened). If there was actual love, the apocalypse would have probably brought them even closer together, but it didn't and they Buffy went to Spike and Xander to Anya.


Also, I don't think any bonding in a romantic sense will happen in the future, because at some point, Spike will come to find Buffy and tell her he's allright with "Wind beneath my Wings" for the first dance. (sw)

 

[palabravampiress]

Well, I'm a big Bander shipper, Sosa, and you pretty much pointed out why. As the series progresses, I get major love and trust vibes coming off of them. They are best friends and regard one another as family. They know each other inside and out. Throw being lovers into the mix, and that's pretty much the relationship that my hubby and I have, which is why I don't understand why people are so against the friends becoming lovers thing. Yes, there's a huge risk of ruining the friendship. But, if two people genuinely know, love, respect, and like each other at the beginning of a relationship, it is also less likely that the relationship will end (or end badly). I think Xander and Buffy really connect. They sort of act like a couple, so I wouldn't mind them taking the leap at some point near the end of the comics.

 

[Vampmogs2]

There were other circumstances, but it was Spike who defended Buffy in Empty Places, not Xander. He didn't go after her, and only apologised when she came back (I think, I don't remember exactly what happened).

I'm sorry but I'd see that as more of a reason to hope for Buffy/Xander than Buffy/Spike. Faith was right in 'Touched' when she called Spike whipped, "I think it's cute, how she's got you whipped." He wasn't there in 'Empty Places' and barged into that house automatically defending Buffy without viewing the situation objectively. He did whatever Buffy wanted him, agreed with her no matter what. It was silly. I always respected how Xander wasn't afraid to stand up to Buffy when he thought she was out of line.

What Buffy asked of Xander was pretty unreasonable. She wanted to go back into the vineyard just like last time with no evidence just a "hunch." Why would any of them want to risk their lives again on a hunch? Buffy did exactly the same thing in 'Dirty Girls' when she her "I'm going in anyway" attitude with no evidence Caleb was in fact keeping anything of hers. She didn’t learn her lesson from last time and everything was entitled to want more than just an idea as a reason to go back into that place.

Xander may have not defended her in ‘Empty Places’ but he’s the guy *Buffy* credits as being “the reason she made it this far” and says she trusts him with her life. He’s been by her side for seven years, Spike defending her in ‘Touched’ doesn’t suddenly override that.

I'm not trying to take credit from Spike for what he did in 'Touched' he gave her strength *that night* but Xander's given her that the entire series and Buffy says this in 'End of Days.' If we were going to base on who's more right for her based on that, Xander would win hands down over any other romantic interest Buffy has had.

 

[Wishing Oceans]

Although you do make a good point, I just can't see Buffy and Xander as parents. I do think that he helped out with Dawn a lot, but see it more as a friend helping out. After all, they've been friends a while, and friends have a duty to help a buddy in need. :thought: