I'm sorry but I'd see that as more of a reason to hope for Buffy/Xander than Buffy/Spike. Faith was right in 'Touched' when she called Spike whipped, "I think it's cute, how she's got you whipped." He wasn't there in 'Empty Places' and barged into that house automatically defending Buffy without viewing the situation objectively. He did whatever Buffy wanted him, agreed with her no matter what. It was silly. I always respected how Xander wasn't afraid to stand up to Buffy when he thought she was out of line.
What Buffy asked of Xander was pretty unreasonable. She wanted to go back into the vineyard just like last time with no evidence just a "hunch." Why would any of them want to risk their lives again on a hunch? Buffy did exactly the same thing in 'Dirty Girls' when she her "I'm going in anyway" attitude with no evidence Caleb was in fact keeping anything of hers. She didn't learn her lesson from last time and everything was entitled to want more than just an idea as a reason to go back into that place.
Xander may have not defended her in "˜Empty Places' but he's the guy *Buffy* credits as being "the reason she made it this far" and says she trusts him with her life. He's been by her side for seven years, Spike defending her in "˜Touched' doesn't suddenly override that.
I'm not trying to take credit from Spike for what he did in 'Touched' he gave her strength *that night* but Xander's given her that the entire series and Buffy says this in 'End of Days.' If we were going to base on who's more right for her based on that, Xander would win hands down over any other romantic interest Buffy has had.