Buffy crying

[Joshua]

Anybody remember when Buffy and Tara were talking about Spike's chip and they're sexual feelings towards each other, then Buffy just started crying on Tara's lap.

I dont know which broke my heart the cry in Dead Things (I think that was the episode) or the cry in The Prom

 

[Skytteflickan88]

That scene in season 6 made both hate and pity spike so much. Hate, because he had made her cry like that, and pity, because he who had only a partial conscience and who had lived in a really frakked up relationship for over a hundred years could never grasp buffy's disgust with herself for being with him. He Might be able to understand that she suffers from losing heaven, but he didn't ever get why she couldn't stand that he was a soulless vampire.

It's that scene, and buffy's continued shows of dislike of spike's evil sides that make me feel sick just thinking about season 6. Fred dying, the body, warren and the others almost raping katrina, even willow mindviolating tara, none of it makes my heart clench and my stomach feel as sick as thinking about how the raping seriekiller and the suicidal depressed slayer got together.

There's nothing wrong with being fascinated with the spuffy relationship in season 6, or only focusing on the good things, so i don't judge spuffy fans, but i personally feel so bad when thinking about it.

 

[Willow My Love]

The Prom broke my heart because Buffy was in actual pain. Her heart was breaking. In the instance with Tara, Buffy was crying out of self pity and disgust. It wasn't because she was hurt, but because she loathed herself.

 

[Skytteflickan88]

The Prom broke my heart because Buffy was in actual pain. Her heart was breaking. In the instance with Tara, Buffy was crying out of self pity and disgust. It wasn't because she was hurt, but because she loathed herself.

I've never been in love, or slept with a murderer, but i imagine that the pain of getting dumped is less than the pain of hating yourself. I can't imagne how filthy she must have felt.

Or, another way of looking at it, heartbreak might hurt more, but i think selfhatered can leave deeper scars. Also, there's the shame of sex involved. Most people have hang ups regarding sex, then add even more guilt about doing it with a murderer. And she might have been in love with spike aleady, so mix in denial and more selfhatred for not only liking, but loving a guy that kills for fun.

 

[Willow My Love]

I've never been in love, or slept with a murderer, but i imagine that the pain of getting dumped is less than the pain of hating yourself. I can't imagne how filthy she must have felt.

Or, another way of looking at it, heartbreak might hurt more, but i think selfhatered can leave deeper scars. Also, there's the shame of sex involved. Most people have hang ups regarding sex, then add even more guilt about doing it with a murderer. And she might have been in love with spike aleady, so mix in denial and more selfhatred for not only liking, but loving a guy that kills for fun.

I really, truly don't mean to offend here, but if you've never been in love, then you have no idea how badly it hurts. Like Buffy says, it's like you can't breathe. The air is gone from the room. You can end up in deep self loathing for letting that love die. I can't even describe it. I've been in love a few times, and each time it hurts more to lose it. And I think that leaves incredibly deep scars. Buffy's not going to hate herself forever. She's only in her 20's.

I don't think she actually loved Spike until s7, and still, not in the same way the he loved her.

 

[Skytteflickan88]

I really, truly don't mean to offend here, but if you've never been in love, then you have no idea how badly it hurts. Like Buffy says, it's like you can't breathe. The air is gone from the room. You can end up in deep self loathing for letting that love die. I can't even describe it. I've been in love a few times, and each time it hurts more to lose it. And I think that leaves incredibly deep scars. Buffy's not going to hate herself forever. She's only in her 20's.

I don't think she actually loved Spike until s7, and still, not in the same way the he loved her.

Okay, i believe that you would handle sleeping with a murderer betternthan buffy. I need to remember we're different people and there's not exactly a right or wrong reaction here.

But, from what we're shown on screen, Buffy seems to be able to handle the break up
Much better than sleeping with spike(not that we know which thing hat hurts her more to remember today). So for that reason, i think her crying in season 6 is more horrible than in the prom.

 

[ILLYRIAN]

Oops, I read that wrong. It is about Buffy and Spike, not about Buffy and Tara's feeling for each other.

And about how much Buffy loved Spike? Well, Buffy wasn't able to talk about her feelings much. Take Buffy and Riley's relationship, using how much she loved Riley and how she vocalised her feelings. Then, reading between those lines Buffy probably loved Spike a heck of a lot.

 

[Skytteflickan88]

To add to my earlier post:

I wold like to compare with wesley's reactions actually. He seemed to take fred's rejection harder than his sexual relationship or whatever to call it, with lilah, who's a murderer as well. So in that event, i think his heartbreak is more horrible than his feelings about lilah's and his thing(too be fear, i need to do a re-watch of season 4).

 

[sisterofmercy]

I think that when Buffy was crying in S6 it wasn't just about Spike but about everything. The trauma of being pulled out of heaven, being unable to really talk to her friends and then feelings of guilt and whatever else regarding her treatment of Spike. She was depressed in S6 and I think when it gets to the point where you break down and cry (which can be difficult if you have depression and are numb or hollow a lot), you can't get much worse.

Buffy crying during the Prom episode was bad as she was heartbroken, but she was still young at the time and so her emotions felt bigger than they were. By season 6 she's supposed to be an adult and has all this pressure and pain that she's unable to get rid of, she was suffering a lot more imo.

 

[shadcat]

Oops, I read that wrong. It is about Buffy and Spike, not about Buffy and Tara's feeling for each other.

And about how much Buffy loved Spike? Well, Buffy wasn't able to talk about her feelings much. Take Buffy and Riley's relationship, using how much she loved Riley and how she vocalised her feelings. Then, reading between those lines Buffy probably loved Spike a heck of a lot.

Speaking of Tara and Buffy...I feel like Buffy never got close enough to anyone outside Xander, Willow, Dawn, Giles. It's like she didn't really consider Tara or Anya friends.

And to be on topic - I think it's because Buffy was always in love with Angel. She never loved Spike in the same way because of that first love. At least that is how I viewed it while watching.

 

[Willow My Love]

But, from what we're shown on screen, Buffy seems to be able to handle the break up
Much better than sleeping with spike(not that we know which thing hat hurts her more to remember today). So for that reason, i think her crying in season 6 is more horrible than in the prom.

Exactly. That's only what we're shown on screen. We saw how she took losing Angel before. Granted, its not exactly the same, but similar. We didn't get to see her reaction, so I do t think we can properly judge.

Based on the crying, Buffy crying on Willow's lap broke my heart a lot more.

 

[YummySushiPJs]

Speaking of Tara and Buffy...I feel like Buffy never got close enough to anyone outside Xander, Willow, Dawn, Giles. It's like she didn't really consider Tara or Anya friends.

I noticed this too, but I do think Buffy and Tara became gradually quite close especially after the whole "please don't forgive me" scene we are discussing here.

It would have been nice to see Buffy and Xander being a bit more upset over Tara's death. Buffy's reaction consisted of "Oh God... Tara.... Ok, moving on!" I know she had her hands full stopping Willow (as they all did) but i thought somewhere over the space of those 3 episodes she could have found time for a quick sob.

Who was it that found Dawn sitting with tara's body? Was that Buffy? That would have been an ideal moment for some sisterly hugging and crying over the death of their friend.

As for Anya - her status as a "friend" of Buffy is always questionable. I think when all is said and done, yes they are friends, but Anya doesn't like to call herself that. I never especially understood her line in a late season 7 episode when Buffy says something along the lines of "you're all my friends" and Anya says "I'm not." I thought that was a bit harsh considering all they have been through.

 

[SlayerFest]

The Prom broke my heart because Buffy was in actual pain. Her heart was breaking. In the instance with Tara, Buffy was crying out of self pity and disgust. It wasn't because she was hurt, but because she loathed herself.

Self-hatred is 10x more painful than having your heartbroken. Trust me. I've been through both.

 

[Willow My Love]

Self-hatred is 10x more painful than having your heartbroken. Trust me. I've been through both.

Then you've never been as deeply in love as she was. I've been through both. And the heartbreak nearly ended me...

 

[Ripper666]

I was confused, I mean why turned Buffy to Tara? Maybe because she was more far away from her than the others. This sounds crazzy but I mean that she shamed herself so much, she couldn't turn towards Willow or Xander or Dawn, the blame and shame had been so big at her breakdown. Tara was a person in Buffy's world, but not the person. At least she was importan enought to talk about her deepest feelings what shows that Buffy trusts Tara very much! Even not in a way she trusts Xander or Willow! Very important scene because it makes Tara no longer an outsider of the Scoobie Gang for me. With this conversation she got part of the Scoobie Gang! I think it's also important that Tara was a lespian. That confused me because she has no experiences with man! But Maybe this was a sort of self-protection from Buffy, she did not want to divulge too much of her.

 

[SlayerFest]

Then you've never been as deeply in love as she was. I've been through both. And the heartbreak nearly ended me...

Trust me...I still am. I always will be. It'll never, ever go away. It completely changed my life and I'm entirely different person because it nearly destroyed me. It really, really sucks. That is such an understatement but I don't know what else to say without sounding insanely dramatic.

But I mean, that's just my opinion that self-loathing is worse than heartbreak. The self-loathing never really goes away, it's subdued at times but I feel like it'll always be there. Haha sorry this conversation is turning into like a therapy session. To get back on track, I think it's easier to talk about heartbreak. There's a reason why Buffy didn't tell her friends that she was sleeping with Spike, because she hated herself for it. She wanted so desperately for something to be wrong with her so that she'd have an excuse for making bad choices...I know exactly what that feels like.

Inner turmoil is...well, something that makes one feel isolated and alone. When things fester inside of you, everything hurts. Physically and emotionally.

 

[Willow My Love]

I know exactly what that feels like.

Inner turmoil is...well, something that makes one feel isolated and alone. When things fester inside of you, everything hurts. Physically and emotionally.

I know. I've been there. I hated myself so much that I became addicted to pills. They made me not feel anything at all, and I thought that was better, but it wasn't. I ended up doing a lot of stupid things while on those. And now I have permanent damage to my organs from it. Believe me when I say I know what self-loathing is.

To me, heartbreak was more painful. It didn't last for years, but at the time, it hurt more.

 

[Living Dead Boy]

Well, I for one, thought Buffy crying at the end of "Dead Things" was more painful, and more relatable to me than "The Prom"'s breakdown. Like you guys have said, I relate to both, but IMHO self-hatred is definitely worse, because at the end of the day, all you have is yourself, and while I would be devastated at the loss of a partner, I would never let it break me. People come and go, but you're your own ally for the rest of your life. It's important that your inner self is taken care of first.

 

[SlayerFest]

I know. I've been there. I hated myself so much that I became addicted to pills. They made me not feel anything at all, and I thought that was better, but it wasn't. I ended up doing a lot of stupid things while on those. And now I have permanent damage to my organs from it. Believe me when I say I know what self-loathing is.

To me, heartbreak was more painful. It didn't last for years, but at the time, it hurt more.

Well people react to things differently. To me the heartbreak was less painful, and it seemed to be less painful for Buffy. But I'm basing this on my own personal experience so I guess that makes my assumption slightly biased.

 

[PassionBecoming]

That cry was awful to watch. Buffy was so lost at that point - she missed what she had in Heaven and wasn't connecting to anything or anyone in the world, except for a vampire who she should hate but is attracted to. I think she was just desperate to find meaning or to find an excuse as to why she was doing what she did, and when she realized it was just her, something inside just broke.