I'll often skip much or all of this ep on rewatches...only the zombie aspect really make it worth watching to me (though Buffy first entering Giles' apartment was nice).
I'm mostly bothered all the way through (and another question on how crosses work when Xander's "cross armor" didn't seem to do much for him). So she's cleared for murder...she still severely assaulted police officers. And given the murder in the library along with major damage and injuries, I don't think even a cover up by the police and Watchers (both which I can easily believe with a little head canon, including on why those chose not to prosecute over resisting arrest and assault on police), I'd think the entire school would be buzzing about it, enough to not mistake it for a girl out of rehab (especially as it sounded like the ones who said that probably did time in rehab himself), though I try to think of them as "new arrivals."
This is one where Xander really ticks me off dismissing it as "boy troubles." Even he's not that thick (that it was an aspect, sure, but more went on as he well knew, and I headcanon that his own guilt over the lie also made him project his own self-loathing into Buffy and Angel so he could, for a moment, hate someone other than himself), and attacking in front of everyone...well he'd know what that's like, I would presume, given his family. And flaws aside, he's usually better than to do so that openly.
But for me, Willow is more infuriating for her gaslighting about "wanting you to talk to me." (That ending was amusing, but Willow was way too self-righteous.) I know why my upbringing makes it that I prefer open conflict to gaslighting and unrelenting passive aggressive hostility, but that is neither here nor there, just why I get angrier with Willow, and even the adult Joyce (not that I'm giving Xander and Joyce a pass here).
Though I try to understand Joyce's point of view and blame Pat, she really went off in front of all those people that I'd think she'd know better than...especially if she was going to tolerate that party in her home, which I don't see. I've invented head canon for why Joyce did allow it (essentially out of desperation to keep Buffy around by not being too strict this time, but hating it which exacerbated her anger, and projecting her own guilt, with Pat and booze also exacerbating that), but it feels off to me to begin with. If she was really that drunk then I'd see her kicking everyone else out first, but that wouldn't be as dramatic for the viewer (which makes it doubly annoying as a sense of contrivance creeps in on top of everything else).
Story wise, I hate it. I hate the writing, and it does make it painful and angering to watch. In some ways it felt downright contrived (though not season 7 level of contrivance), I swear they must teach "always have the protagonist dogpiled by everyone somewhere in the movie or season and then overcome it" in film school. It's a tired trope, and one I wish Joss would've subverted more as he did some (but far from all) tropes.
It also feels incongruous to me that they're fighting nightmares given form on a regular basis and yet act like a soap opera of mundane high school drama. At least for some, it should've been more "dereliction of duty" (not to say it would be less infuriating, but it wouldn't feel so...tropish...so like that the monsters and horrors they fight aren't actually real, as if that were all a role playing game than real life so that they can focus on this teen soap opera aspect).
Again I hate the ep because of that...on the other hand, I hate Pat (who I've met real life examples of who do a lot of deliberate damage under the guise of caring) so much more than sometimes I will endure it just to see Pat (imagining her as people so like her that I've known) killed twice. Which means I'm not a saint, either.
