Do you have childhood traumas?

[Chosen Enemy]

Were there any stories from your childhood that you remember till today and affect you till now? Share!

Mine is, when I was about 3, I had my birthday party at the kindergarden with all the kids. And I really wished to get for my birthday that particular plastic plane toy that was very popular back then. It was my dream. And my parents did buy it for me. But no, it doesn't have a good ending! Because the kindergarden workers decided that the kindergarden should have that toy, to let everybody play with it, so it would be all the children's toy, not just mine. That was horrible and so unfair! Even though I was so little, I still remember it, and it left me with a scar. Since then my parents are trying to find that plane everywhere. But it doesn't exist in this reality anymore.

 

[Taake]

Hmm... I think our definition of "childhood trauma" differs substantially ::huh1::

 

[Chosen Enemy]

Hmm... I think our definition of "childhood trauma" differs substantially ::huh1::

Childhood trauma is a scar from an event from... childhood. Mine left me that scar till today, hating all those people who told me to give away MY plane. Now I'm scared that when I get a present, I'd have to share it with everybody around me.

 

[BuffyElevated]

I agree with Taake; my definition of "childhood trauma" and yours are wayyyy different. LOL

Something from my childhood that traumatized me? When my cousin Bridget and I were little, our parents left us home alone to run errands from time to time. Since we lived less than an acre away from each other, we were always playing together at either her house or mine. Back then, people weren't as crazy about how old children have to be to take care of themselves and stuff, and so it wasn't a big deal for she and I to be left home alone for 30 minutes or so.
When we were about 10 and 9 (she's a year older than me), we began to get these weird phone calls every single time we'd be left alone. Someone would call and we would answer and they'd always ask "Are you home alone?" We would always lie, but it scared the crap out of us because it was obvious that someone was watching.
Not long after the phone calls started, we started noticing strange cars coming by really slowly when we'd play outside. We lived out in the country, and there were only 3 houses on the gravel road we lived on, so we knew it wasn't a neighbor, and there would be no reason for anyone to be coming up and down that road so slow unless they were looking for something.
We told our parents, and they stopped leaving us alone so much, but one year at Christmas, all the adults went to a big party and my older brother was supposed to be watching us. However, my cousins had gotten a new Sega for Christmas that year, so he left us home alone at my house so he could go down to Bridget's house to play the game with her brothers.
Not long after he left, we got one of the calls. Bridget answered the phone and as soon as she realized it was one of those calls, she hung up without saying a word. We were in the process of gathering our new toys up to go down to her house when a car pulled into the driveway. A man we didn't recognize got out and came up the walk, and began peering into the windows. We hid, and sure enough, he came around to the door on the side of the house and started trying to get the door open. Something must have spooked him, though, 'cause he ran back to his car and left. As soon as his car was gone, we ran through the field that separated our houses so fast we could have set the ground on fire.
Ever since then, I get really really anxious and nervous when I'm home alone at night. I'm always terrified that someone's going to break in on me. Which is NOT a good thing, considering my husband is leaving for a deployment soon. :\

 

[theroyalgoat]

My Mom was 19 when she had me. She was in the army at the time and when my father found out about the pregnacy he divorced her. My she raised me in the army and then quit when I was eight and got a regular job and then started unconciously started blaming me for it, and then blaming me for the divorce and as her life got worse she got more and more used to blaming me for it. Until she had my sisters, then she basically forgot all about me.

Our definitions definately differ.

 

[Goldilocks]

Yeah.. in 2006, my grandmother had cancer.. and I was to visit her at the hospital.. When I came to the hospital I did not know how ill she actually was, so I found her after an operation gone wrong, so her whole body was kinda malformed. She was so embarrassed herself, I panicked and started to cry, and my grandma was like "Come, dear" and I just couldn't. I remember, I cried hysterically outside her room because I thought she was about to die - and even though the doctors claimed she was gonna be fine, she died a couple of weeks later.
Since that day I could not enter a hospital.. So in 2009 my grandfather got cancer too, and I had to visit him too. That was the first time I entered a hospital since 2006. Just as I walked in, I started to cry..

So actually.. That's my biggest trauma, and I will never be able to enter a hospital without thinking about my grandparents.

 

[Username]

I was born in Israel and lived there with my family until I was 2, and when I was baby there was this war over there, it still is but it was during the Gulf war and missiles and gas bombs or something was being shot into Israel and sometimes this loud alarm would go off in the kibbutz where my family lived and everybody would have to put on gasmask's, except for me cos I was to little and I had to stay in an incubator while my family were all standing around it wearing those creepy gasmask's while touching me with plastic gloves in through the incubator.
I don't remember any of this but my mom says I cried the whole time I was in there and I've had lots and lots of nightmares about people in weird mask's standing above me and touching me... that's kinda funny

 

[Angels baby101]

The two that stick out the most in my mind are...

When I was like 4 my great grandma died... She lived in the nursing home and every week we'd visit.. well one day we went to visit and the lady quietly took my grandma to the side and told her and went to walk her back, she was crying and I didn't understand why I wasn't going to see her too. So I went running after them screaming cause It was right after christmas and I wanted to show my great grandma my new dollie. It took my mom, and my great uncle to hold me back from going to see her. It was really sad.

And when I was 7 I was attacked my two huge Rottweilers in front of my school I have about 10 scars on my upper right arm, and one scar across my chest. They tore my bicept or tricept muscle not sure which can't remember. I was in the hospital for about a week. Lets just say I can't be around rottweilers anymore they terrify me so.

 

[Buffy Summers]

I think people should stick to the original posters' definition, rather than chastising them for their word choice. Their intent is clear.

Thanks 🙂

 

[PrincessBuffy16]

When I was about 7 years old there was a rapist in my neibghourhood. He raped the girl who lived in my street and was 2 years older than me. They didn't catched him, and for 3 months my parents were driving me and coming to pick me up for school.. and my school was pretty close to my house, about 10 minutes by foot. As 3-4 months passed and police didn't catched him and no one else was harmed, people felt free to let their kids by their own. One day I was coming back from school, it was about 7.15pm.. I was so close to my house and there was a man in front of a bulding. When I walked by him he asked me do I want to see something in the building basement.. I told him I have to go home. He said fine, and I kept walking. After few cm's walked, I've heard someone behind me.. I looked back and saw a shadow. I started runing and I've heard someone walking faster behind me.. I ran as fastest as I could and just ran into my house. It's good luck that my mom always unlocked the door around 7 because she knew I'll be home soon so I don't have to ring the bell. I've looked outside the window and haven't seen anyone. I still don't know was that man the rapist who raped girl from my street and did he followed me or was that an ordinary man.. I just know I'm still afraid of the dark, and walking alone in the street..

 

[zobothehobo]

Well when I was 6 my parents got divorced. It was a really really bad divorce... I didn't care mom and dad weren't living together and I didn't want them to stay married. I just wanted them to stop screaming at me and calling the other bad names.

Dad cheated on mom and left her ON HER BIRTHDAY after coming back home late (meaning he'd been off with whoever he was seeing). That was awful. Then mom had to sell the house alone because she couldn't pay for it. That was awful. Then there was this BIG fight over a piece of land they owned on Falls Lake. They had a plan to build a house there and move there to raise us. Apparently my grandfather paid for most of it so he said the money they made from selling it should be his. Dad said he should get half and mom should get half. The fight was endless. I have no idea what happened and I'm afraid that if I ask, I'll start the fight all over again.

Because mom was so hurt dad cheated on her (with a guy) she told her lawyer dad cheated with a guy and her lawyer played the gay card in the custody battle. That's why legally we're supposed to spend more time with mom than dad. That was awful. That killed my father inside... He's never really been ok with it and mom made him feel even worse about liking men.

The first major relationship both my parents had after each other was awful. Dad dated Chris. Chris moved in with us not long after we moved into our apartment (which makes me think Chris is who my dad cheated on my mom with but I don't know). Mom made us spy on them asking questions like "what do Chris and your dad do?" And before Chris officially moved in "did Chris stay the night?" Dad and Chris's break up was the worst. Dad had an alcohol problem... he tried to drink away his problems... that was during the whole custody thing so it's understandable. They broke up because Chris called my dad a drunk and sad dad needed help. He probably did and he was probably drunk at the time, but I was too young to know what was going on. All I know is I still have the most vivid nightmares about that day and I'll never forget how awful it was. I can't talk about it more because... I just can't... but it was one of the worst days ever and I'm pretty sure I have PTSD from it... no joke.

Mom's first relationship after dad was Steve. Mom used Steve to tutor her in computer class so she could get a job that payed better. She slept with him instead of paying him. He was a jackass. He was a redneck and a jerk and mom stooped low on that one. She knew it and we knew it. After they broke up we had to change the locks so that he couldn't get in. We weren't there but according to mom, one night he tried to get in to "talk" to her (his form of talking was more like screaming). That was when she decided to change the locks and our phone number.

I could go on with things that traumatized me as a child... but then I would sound like the whiniest person on earth. I had a pretty tough childhood and I know that... but I'm not looking for sympathy.

---------- Post added at 05:00 PM ---------- Previous post was at 04:58 PM ----------

When I was about 7 years old there was a rapist in my neibghourhood. He raped the girl who lived in my street and was 2 years older than me. They didn't catched him, and for 3 months my parents were driving me and coming to pick me up for school.. and my school was pretty close to my house, about 10 minutes by foot. As 3-4 months passed and police didn't catched him and no one else was harmed, people felt free to let their kids by their own. One day I was coming back from school, it was about 7.15pm.. I was so close to my house and there was a man in front of a bulding. When I walked by him he asked me do I want to see something in the building basement.. I told him I have to go home. He said fine, and I kept walking. After few cm's walked, I've heard someone behind me.. I looked back and saw a shadow. I started runing and I've heard someone walking faster behind me.. I ran as fastest as I could and just ran into my house. It's good luck that my mom always unlocked the door around 7 because she knew I'll be home soon so I don't have to ring the bell. I've looked outside the window and haven't seen anyone. I still don't know was that man the rapist who raped girl from my street and did he followed me or was that an ordinary man.. I just know I'm still afraid of the dark, and walking alone in the street..

Sorry, I hit enter too soon. My rep was supposed to say "oh crap, sorry that happened to you but I'm glad you got away"

 

[Willow My Love]

There was that one time for six years that I was abused by my step father... He'd lock me outside in the snow with no shoes and no coat because he "forgot" he shoved me out the door. I was a sickly child, and he was the reason. He'd push me down stairs, throw things at me, lock me in my room for days without food. Mom worked a lot, so she didn't know what happened, and didn't believe me when I told her. I try not to hate anyone, but he's the exception. I was 6 when he married my mom and he told me every, single day until I was 12 that since I was the second twin born, no one really wanted me. I wasn't loved as much as my brothers and I should do my mom a favor and kill myself. I know that's not true, but I have incredibly low self esteem because of that asshole. I used to have very vivid dreams of killing him. Like every night Spike saved Buffy, in all different ways, I killed my step dad.

That's my most memorable one. My brothers used to beat me up a lot too. I couldn't wear T-shirts in elementary school for months at a time because my brothers wouldn't let the bruises on my arms from them heal. Eventually, my twin realized that they were actually, really hurting me, and he stopped it. But, I still prefer long sleeve shirts. Even in the middle of summer. It took me years to even wear a tank top.

Those are a few reasons I'm cynical and sarcastic. I hide from what hurt me.

 

[Buffy Summers]

Okay, guys, I get where the OP was going with this thread but I don't think this is something we need to have here on the board, so I'm closing it.

---------- Post added at 06:51 PM ---------- Previous post was at 05:21 PM ----------

So by trauma we should stick to the 'trauma' level of OP and just keep out mouths shut about anything else? Ok, one time I made cookies and they were runny and everyone was disapointed.

Yes,

a) because that was what the original poster intended.

and

b) the reason that this thread was closed, that this is an EXTREMELY triggering thread and survivors of abuse DO NOT NEED TO READ ABOUT IT ON A MESSAGE BOARD ABOUT BUFFY.

If you have a problem with a thread being closed, please pm a staff member rather than making snarky comments in karma. We do have reasons for the things we do.