thrasherpix
Scooby
- Joined
- Mar 13, 2016
- Messages
- 5,314
- Age
- 43
Most of the "horror stories" would take too long to explain, or I forget relevant details. Though I can share one short example on how one aunt who goes out of her way to tick me off. She once tried to interrogate me on what I was "trying to hide by living in California" and I snarked, "Living around here would drive me to religion, probably Wicca." 😛
(She told me I could take my smart mouth back to California. Such was typical of our interactions that she would have to escalate over the years until she finally got what she wanted. I wonder if it's worth the glasses she had to replace and blood she lost over it, and that even the relatives who yelled at me told her she was begging for what I did to her, more from her obnoxious behavior even before she slapped my face which was followed by my own retaliatory violence. Her main problem with me is actually more that she doesn't like my mom--her sister--despite that I'm not that close to Mom...and after I smacked her down hard her adult son called me up to tell me that I'm now his favorite cousin.)
Though one really bad heat wave (which the aunt just mentioned vexed me further, and I think she'd have assaulted me that time instead of the next time I showed up, but it was just too hot to put out the effort for her--this was technically not a gathering as I was present because my grandmother was in the hospital with a pulmonary embolism and I feared she might not live much longer), the heat caused an uncle (not married to the aunt that vexes me every chance she gets) to snap at me over and over, though he usually doesn't give me a hard time (though this is the same uncle that killed my favorite cow when I was a small child and fed her to me to teach me cows aren't pets, which actually taught me that my love can get others killed). At the time I'd just gotten done reading the entire Harry Potter series back to back and watching the first 6 movies, and ended up using some British slang, to which he yelled at me to stop "talking like a valley girl." 😀
That uncle is a big fan of FOX News, and I forget what set it off (other than the 110F/43 Celsius that we were doing farm chores in was making us both cranky) but we got into an argument over it. I'm particularly close to his son (and practically see that cousin as a brother) who asked me about it later. As a result of what I said, he made a drinking game out of it the next day as O'Reilly was one peppering his talk with plenty of sarcasm, including calling President Obama "the anointed one" over and over again. And every time O'Reilly did, my cousin took a shot of whiskey, and doing it so much that even when his mom asked him why he was drinking so much he had to pause his explanation of my "FOX News drinking game" to take more shots. His dad threw him out, which was probably for the best. At the rate he was going he'd have probably suffered liver failure if they hadn't stopped him. 😛
Though that uncle and I do get along (while not being particularly close), and it was under his roof that me and his sister exchanged physical violence, for which he yelled at his sister more than me for having provoked me (a big maxim in my family is "if you poke a snake with a stick then it's your own fault if you get bit") though he had some choice words for me as well...I considered him harsh but fair in that incident, and as it was under his roof I said little other than "Yes, sir."
There's so much personal history there, and it's odd to consider how much I am that is in opposition to them is because of them. That uncle's wife once threw me into a lake when I was 4 to "teach" me how to swim with only a life preserver to hold me up. Being 4, I cried for her to come get me so she walked away. At that point I did figure out how to get myself back, though the thick life preserver nearly drowned me as it tipped me over and held my head underwater until I kicked my legs in the air hard enough to turn back over. That lake still shows up in my dreams to this day, still looking huge as it did to me at 4. I believe that experience is one of the reasons I became so independent. 'Course as I got older they found my independent nature that they themselves encouraged distressing to them as it also meant I felt less inclined to fall into line with them, which thus facilitated my diverging greatly from the family, go figure. 🙄
(She told me I could take my smart mouth back to California. Such was typical of our interactions that she would have to escalate over the years until she finally got what she wanted. I wonder if it's worth the glasses she had to replace and blood she lost over it, and that even the relatives who yelled at me told her she was begging for what I did to her, more from her obnoxious behavior even before she slapped my face which was followed by my own retaliatory violence. Her main problem with me is actually more that she doesn't like my mom--her sister--despite that I'm not that close to Mom...and after I smacked her down hard her adult son called me up to tell me that I'm now his favorite cousin.)
Though one really bad heat wave (which the aunt just mentioned vexed me further, and I think she'd have assaulted me that time instead of the next time I showed up, but it was just too hot to put out the effort for her--this was technically not a gathering as I was present because my grandmother was in the hospital with a pulmonary embolism and I feared she might not live much longer), the heat caused an uncle (not married to the aunt that vexes me every chance she gets) to snap at me over and over, though he usually doesn't give me a hard time (though this is the same uncle that killed my favorite cow when I was a small child and fed her to me to teach me cows aren't pets, which actually taught me that my love can get others killed). At the time I'd just gotten done reading the entire Harry Potter series back to back and watching the first 6 movies, and ended up using some British slang, to which he yelled at me to stop "talking like a valley girl." 😀
That uncle is a big fan of FOX News, and I forget what set it off (other than the 110F/43 Celsius that we were doing farm chores in was making us both cranky) but we got into an argument over it. I'm particularly close to his son (and practically see that cousin as a brother) who asked me about it later. As a result of what I said, he made a drinking game out of it the next day as O'Reilly was one peppering his talk with plenty of sarcasm, including calling President Obama "the anointed one" over and over again. And every time O'Reilly did, my cousin took a shot of whiskey, and doing it so much that even when his mom asked him why he was drinking so much he had to pause his explanation of my "FOX News drinking game" to take more shots. His dad threw him out, which was probably for the best. At the rate he was going he'd have probably suffered liver failure if they hadn't stopped him. 😛
Though that uncle and I do get along (while not being particularly close), and it was under his roof that me and his sister exchanged physical violence, for which he yelled at his sister more than me for having provoked me (a big maxim in my family is "if you poke a snake with a stick then it's your own fault if you get bit") though he had some choice words for me as well...I considered him harsh but fair in that incident, and as it was under his roof I said little other than "Yes, sir."
There's so much personal history there, and it's odd to consider how much I am that is in opposition to them is because of them. That uncle's wife once threw me into a lake when I was 4 to "teach" me how to swim with only a life preserver to hold me up. Being 4, I cried for her to come get me so she walked away. At that point I did figure out how to get myself back, though the thick life preserver nearly drowned me as it tipped me over and held my head underwater until I kicked my legs in the air hard enough to turn back over. That lake still shows up in my dreams to this day, still looking huge as it did to me at 4. I believe that experience is one of the reasons I became so independent. 'Course as I got older they found my independent nature that they themselves encouraged distressing to them as it also meant I felt less inclined to fall into line with them, which thus facilitated my diverging greatly from the family, go figure. 🙄
