I'm gonna play devil's advocate here.
During the Angelus arc, he had killed Jenny Calendar and numerous students, Giles was tortured severely. To me, it has absolutely nothing to do with jealously. Really, Xander is dating Cordelia, and kissing Willow. Where the hell does jealousy come into it?
Angelus was a savage murderer, a sadist. So now he is back, with a soul. People aren't going to accept it instantly at face value. Sure, Xander shouldn't have spied on Buffy, no denial there. But Xander's perspective is completely understandable, having to put up with the face of the man who murdered a beloved teacher and friend, classmates, tortured your father figure. I think it shows a great deal of favoritism when fans excuse Buffy for running away for three months, emphasing on what Buffy went through, yet they don't do the same for Xander.
Thank you!! People seem to not be objective because Angel is their favorite or something. Look at it from Xander's or Giles' point of view. Jenny is dead because of him, Buffy was hurt because of him, the world almost ended because of him, and yet everyone is so quick to forget. People give Willow smack for almost ending the world, people give Spike smack for attempting to rape Buffy (even though they really do deserve the smack), but yet people don't give Angel any smack (ok some people do but as shown by this thread a lot of people don't). Ok, I'll admit, the show was really quick to forget about both Willow's and Spike's actions, which is not okay, but when they actually do it right and don't forget all about Angel's action, people complain??
I completely understand where both Xander and Faith are coming from. If I was Xander, there would be no way in hell I'd forgive Angel, it's not just about jealousy anymore. And as for Faith, she's a vampire slayer, her job is to kill vampires, so really she's actually doing her job, something that Buffy was never able to do with neither Spike nor Angel.
Um...what? Angel was one of the only incidents among the Scooby gang that was actually dealt with. What's annoying is that his is one of the most clear-cut examples of things not being his fault. I say the same about Spike as well for the things he did without a soul (although I'm aware that there are those who don't). I've been here for a while now and until recently I rarely, if ever, saw people call Willow out.
Angel gets crap from the fan base because he's one of the only characters who actually takes responsibility, even if he shouldn't have too. Spike doesn't really do that until S5 of Angel and Willow never does.
And Xander knows there are extenuating circumstances, at that point he just chooses not to see them. He knows that Angel wasn't at fault for what happened with Jenny Calender. The show makes it crystal clear that "Angel" and "Angelus" are two very separate entities. I mean hell, Giles understands that. He has more right to blind hate than anyone and yet he instead opts to assess the situation rationally and realistically.
I really, truly do not understand the argument that Angel is responsible for what Angelus does. I just don't get, and no one has ever articulated it to me in a way that makes me understand. The common refrain seems to be "oh well he killed Ms. Calender!" and then just completely ignore the circumstances. I'm not trying to be mean, but that's what seems to be happening here. If Spike had killed someone when The First had him brainwashed, it wouldn't have been his fault when he was no longer brainwashed. It's the same situation with Angel.
I understand the concern about the potential for Angelus to re-emerge, but it's a little hard to take Xander seriously when his perspective has been so colored in regards to Buffy for so long. As for Faith, she was perfectly aware of what Angel meant to Buffy and didn't even attempt to talk to her about her suspicious. That's crap. If Giles can look at the situation rationally then so can Xander and Faith.
If you've paid any attention to my posts over the period I've been here, it's no secret that I'm a big Angel fan. He is my favorite character. But that doesn't mean I'm blind to him, just like I'm not blind to Buffy because I like her, or Spike because I like him. In this case though, I think Angel gets an incredibly raw deal from some parts of the fan base.