Falling out of love

Z

zobothehobo

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I was thinking and I'm not sure any of the relationships ended because the characters had fallen out of love with each other... or even if one character fell out of love with the other. It seems death and incompatibility (although there's still love) are the only two reasons for the final break ups in both shows. Except maybe Xander and Anya.

Thoughts?
 
I don't think either Xander or Anya fell out of love.

I can't think of any couple that broke up because they fell out of love, maybe Gunn/Fred. You could say Fred fell out of love with Gunn cause she liked Wesley.
 
Z
zobothehobo
I don't either, but I meant they didn't break up because of one of my two main reasons
M
Ms.Trick
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^ I'm with Katie, other than Gunn/Fred I don't think any couple fell out of love with each other...well maybe Xander and Cordy. I think when Cordy saw Xander with Willow the way she viewed him completely changed. Cordy clearly loved Xander and was in pain after but I think after he betrayed her she fell out of love with him.

Death, sacrifice and incompatibility did seem like the main reasons for couples not making it.
 
X
xfivebyfive
I was thinking Xander/Cordy too
Yeah, I think things move too quick for people to fall out of love with each other. Unless we count like, Hank and Joyce, lol.
 
Xander and Cordy probably thought it was love, but when you compare that relationship to the loves of their lives it's clearly just a teenage romance.

Darla and Angel(us)? 😛

I think you're right though, there was always some big dramatic reason for relationships ending. Nothing really fizzled out, except for Fred and Gunn, but even that was foisted into drama.
 
Definitely agree that Xander and Cordy weren't in love. They were definitely in teen lust, but I wouldn't say true love about those two. Come to think of it though, not many couples from the shows did just fall out of love. Everything had big dramatic endings. Espcially all the big couples. Bangel, Spuffy, Xanya, Cangel, Fresley, Tillow, Woz. All ended in big dramatic deaths or sacrifices or drama. Super unrealistic if you ask me. Of the two big loves of my life 1 was a 'wanted different things but still in love' break up, but the second was definitely a 'fizzle out, and fell out of love' break up.

I've been thinking a lot about relationships on TV recently actually, and I have decided that television has ruined my love life. That's getting off topic though.
 
Professor Walsh
Professor Walsh
Off topic, but a good Bronze topic. Go start it!
Do Spike and Dru count? He did stop loving her at some point. Although I'm not sure about her. She did cheat on him, but it wasn't because of falling out of love.
 
Chosen Enemy said:
Do Spike and Dru count? He did stop loving her at some point. Although I'm not sure about her. She did cheat on him, but it wasn't because of falling out of love.
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Hmm, that's an interesting thought. Would Spike had stayed with Dru if she hadn't dumped him? How would that have changed the trajectory of his character development? How would the chip have affected their relationship? Would he have still chosen to seek his soul? (I think obviously not on that last one)

In terms of the Whedonverse as a whole, Paul & Mellie from Dollhouse are the closest to "falling out of love". Although I don't think they did exactly, events unfolded that prevented them from staying together, although I think they still did love each other in the end. Regardless, I'm definitely more of a Paul/Mellie shipper than a Paul/Echo shipper.
 
Joss has always said that he wants us to feel what the characters feel: hurt when they hurt, love when they love. That's why we relate to them so well. He understands as we do that love is impossible to eradicate completely, even if the type of love we feel shifts to something like friendship, caring, or even hatred. It makes it harder on the characters but it also makes it more realistic. I can't think of an "easy" break up in Buffy or Angel or the rest of the Jossverse for that matter. I love that Joss doesn't sweep feelings under the rug like so many other shows do. Its unrealistic.
 
Um, Buffy and Riley? Definitely no love returned there...(Sadly. Heehee.) I don't feel like they were incompatible, Buffy just wasn't wanting a serious relationship and Riley didn't want to be on stand-by until she was.

Or maybe that is incompatible...
 
PassionBecoming said:
Um, Buffy and Riley? Definitely no love returned there...(Sadly. Heehee.) I don't feel like they were incompatible, Buffy just wasn't wanting a serious relationship and Riley didn't want to be on stand-by until she was.

Or maybe that is incompatible...
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Well I think that 1. that is incompatible... and 2. Buffy did love Riley. I don't think she loved him in the way he needed her to... and I don't think he loved her in the way she needed him to. They loved each other, just not the way they needed to. Hence the incompatibility.
 
K
kndizzle
[No message]
VisionGirl said:
I agree with Fred & Gunn. I don't think Cordy & Xander were truly in love. They dated, they cared for each other, but I don't think it was love.
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I think Cordy was more in love with Xander than Xander was with Cordy. She stood up to her friends (the popular crowd) because she loved and wanted to be with Xander. She also was just so broken hearted when he cheated on her, despite what she did for him. She still cried, even when she told him to stay away. I think it took her some time to then "fall out of love" with Xander.

But, I agree. I think Fred and Gunn were one of the few couples who both fell out of love with each other overtime, which led to their breakup.
 
Actually Gunn and Fred broke up because of the whole Wesley thing, so I don't think they fell out of love because she still loved him for a while after they broke up and he still loved her at the end.

And I don't think you can count Darla/Angel(us) as "love" because as demons they technically aren't supposed to have feelings like that? But then you could say the same for Dru and Spike, although I don't think that was really love either. Despite their age, that too seemed like a "puppy love" kind of deal..
 
forget said:
Actually Gunn and Fred broke up because of the whole Wesley thing, so I don't think they fell out of love because she still loved him for a while after they broke up and he still loved her at the end.
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I think Wesley was a factor, but I also think things changed for Fred and Gunn after Gunn killed Fred's professor.
 
I agree that things changed, but I don't believe one of the changes was them falling out of love.
 
I agree with prophecygrrl, I think things moved too fast for there to really be space for any 'falling out of love'. 🙂

Fred and Gunn I would say fell out of love but that was after their relationship ended. (By season 5 they seem perfectly casual and once in loved but now 'out of love' affectionate with each other.)

But then I kind of like that in story telling, loving someone isn't always going to fix everything, in fact sometimes it just makes it worse and it doesn't work out... so you part. More to avoid pain or future pain than lack of love.
 
Z
zobothehobo
[No message]
X
xfivebyfive
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Gunn/Fred are the only ones I can think of like everyone else. They seemed to be so normal and so was their breakup.

Do Buffy and Parker count? 😛
 
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