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fav quotes & conversations
- Thread starter hotaru anne
- Start date
Anita Blake
The Executioner
s'okay, I don't care. I liked reading them more than once! 😉
Angelique: I love that one! I'm so upset I didn't remember it!
Here's some more:
Angelus: Dear Buffy. I'm still trying to decide the best way to send my regards.
Spike: Why don't you rip her lungs out? It might make an impression.
Angelus: Lacks... poetry.
Spike: It doesn't have to. What rhymes with lungs?
Spike: Are you insane?! We're supposed to kill the bitch, not leave gag gifts in the friends' beds.
Drusilla: But, Spike, the bad teacher was going to restore Angel's soul.
Spike: What if she did? If you ask me, I find myself preferring the old Buffy-whipped Angelus. This new, improved one is not playing with a full sack. I love a good slaughter as much as the next bloke, but his little pranks will only leave us with one incredibly brassed-off Slayer!
Angelus: Don't worry, roller boy. I've got everything under control.
Angelus: You can see all that in your head?
Spike: No, you ninny. She read it in the morning paper.
Spike: It's a big rock. I can't wait to tell my friends. They don't have a rock this big.
Spike: Mmm. The demon wakes up, and wackiness ensues.
Spike: We like to talk big. Vampires do. 'I'm going to destroy the world.' That's just tough guy talk. Strutting around with your friends over a pint of blood. The truth is, I like this world. You've got... dog racing, Manchester United. And you've got people. Billions of people walking around like Happy Meals with legs. It's all right here. But then someone comes along with a vision. With a real... passion for destruction. Angel could pull it off. Goodbye, Piccadilly. Farewell, Leicester Bloody Square. You know what I'm saying?
Spike: Dru bagged a Slayer? She didn't tell me! Hey, good for her! Though not from your perspective, I suppose.
Angelus: Keep out of it, sit 'n' spin.
Spike: Look, you cut him up, you'll never get your answers.
Angelus: Since when did *you* become so levelheaded?
Spike: Right about the time you became so pig-headed. You have your way with him, you'll never get to destroy the world. And I don't fancy spending the next month trying to get librarian out of the carpet.
Spike: She just left. She didn't even care enough to cut off my head or set me on fire. I mean, is that too much to ask? You know? Some little sign that she cared?
Angel: Spike.
Joyce: Oh, my God. Get out of here!
Spike: Yeah. You're not invited.
Joyce: He's crazy. He'll kill us.
Spike: Not while I breathe. Well, actually, I don't breathe.
Angel: Joyce, listen to me.
Joyce: You get out of this house, or I will stake you myself.
Spike: You're a very bad man.
Angel: Joyce, you can't trust him. Invite me in. You touch her, and I'll cut your head off!
Spike: Yeah? You and what army?
Buffy: That would be me. Angel, why don't you come on in?
Spike: I used to bring her rats. With the morning paper.
Buffy: Great. More moping. That's gonna get her back.
Spike: The spell's gonna get her back.
Angel: Lot of trouble for somebody who doesn't even care about you.
Spike: Shut your gob!
Angel: She really is just kind of fickle.
Spike: What do you know? It's your fault, the both of you! She belongs with me. I'm nothing without her.
Buffy: That I'll have to agree with. You're pathetic, you know that? You're not even a loser anymore, you're a shell of a loser.
Spike: Yeah. You're one to talk.
Buffy: Meaning?
Spike: The last time I looked in on you two, you were fighting to the death. Now you're back making googly-eyes at each other like nothing happened. Makes me want to heave.
Buffy: I don't know what you're talking about.
Spike: Oh, yeah. You're just friends.
Angel: That's right.
Spike: You're not friends. You'll never be friends. You'll be in love till it kills you both. You'll fight, and you'll shag, and you'll hate each other till it makes you quiver, but you'll never be friends. Love isn't brains, children, it's blood...blood screaming inside you to work its will. I may be love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it.
Spike: This should be a kick.
Buffy: I violently dislike you.
Spike: Oh, yeah. You two. Just friends. No danger there.
Spike: I'm really glad I came here, you know? I've been all wrongheaded about this. Weeping, crawling, blaming everybody else. I want Dru back, I've just gotta be the man I was, the man she loved. I'm gonna do what I shoulda done in the first place: I'll find her, wherever she is, tie her up, torture her until she likes me again.
Harmony: Is Antonio Banderas a vampire?
Spike: No.
Harmony: Oh. Can I make him a vampire?
Spike: No. Wait, on second thought, yeah, go do that. Take your time. Do Melanie and the kids as well.
Spike: What a fantastic day. Birds singin', squirrels makin' lots of rotten little squirrels, the sun beaming down in a nice non-fatal way. It's very exciting. I can't wait to see if I freckle.
Spike (after Buffy stakes him): Oh, do it again. It tickles. You know, in a good way.
Buffy: The Gem.
Spike: Oh yeah, the Gem of Amara. Official sponsor of my killing you.
Spike (to Buffy behind her back, out of earshot): Watch your mouth, little girl. You should know better than to tempt the Fates that way. 'Cause the Big Bad is back, and this time it's... varghhhhh! (As he's being shocked with a taser.)
Spike (about Buffy): I always worried what would happen when that bitch got some funding.
Spike: I don't understand. This sort of thing's never happened to me before.
Willow: Maybe you were nervous.
Spike: I felt all right when I started. Let's try again.
(He tries, but he can't do it.)
Spike: Damn it!
Willow: Maybe you're trying too hard. Doesn't this happen to every vampire?
Spike: Not to me, it doesn't!
Willow: It's me, isn't it?
Spike: What are you talking about?
Willow: Well, you came looking for Buffy, then settled. You didn't want to bite me, I just happened to be around.
Spike: Piffle.
Willow: I know I'm not the kind of girl vamps like to sink their teeth into. It's always like, 'Oh, you're like a sister to me,' or, 'Oh, you're such a good friend.'
Spike: Don't be ridiculous. I'd bite you in a heartbeat.
Willow: Really?
Spike: Thought about it.
Willow: When?
Spike: Remember last year? You had on that fuzzy pink number with the lilac underneath. (Gives her a sexy look.)
Willow: I never would have guessed. You played the bloodlust kinda cool.
Spike: Mmmm. I hate being obvious. Being all fangy and 'Rrrr.' Takes the mystery out.
Willow: But if you could...
Spike: If I could, yeah.
Willow: You know, this doesn't make you any less terrifying.
Spike: Don't patronize me! (Paces around the room.) I'm only a hundred and twenty-six!
Willow: You're being too hard on yourself. Why don't we wait a half an hour and try again? (Makes a funny face.) Or... (Grabs a lamp and whacks him.)
Spike: What part of 'help me!' do you not understand?
Buffy: The part where I help you.
Spike (on his implant): I'm saying that Spike had a little trip to the vet, and now he doesn't chase the other puppies anymore.
Spike (regarding Xander): Oh, leave that one! He looks like he's ready to drop any minute, and I think I can eat someone if he's already dead.
Spike: A bear! You made a bear!
Buffy: I didn't mean to!
Spike: Undo it! Undo it!:
Giles: We can't let you go until we're sure that you're impotent or "”
Spike: Hey!
Giles: Sorry, poor choice of words. Until we know that you're...
Buffy: Flaccid?
Spike: You are one step away, missy!
Buffy: Giles help! He's gonna scold me!
Buffy: Look at my poor neck "” all bare, and tender, and exposed. All that blood, just pumping away.
Spike: Giles, make her stop!
Giles (to Willow): If those two don't kill each other, I might lend a hand.
Spike: Passions is on! Timmy's down the bloody well, and if you make me miss it I'll "”
Giles: Do what? Lick me to death?
Spike: You're not gonna do anything to me. You don't have the stones!
Buffy: Oh, I got the stones! I've got a whole bunch of... stones!
Spike: When I get this spell reversed, they'll be finding your body for weeks.
Buffy: Oh, make a move. Please. I'm dying for a good slay!
Buffy: It's just so sudden, I don't know what to say.
Spike: Just say yes, and make me the happiest man on earth.
Buffy: Oh, Spike, of course it's yes!
Giles: Are you helping me?
Spike: Well, it's almost like you're my father-in-law, isn't it?
Buffy: Honey, we need to talk about the invitations. Now, do you want to be 'William the Bloody' or just 'Spike,' because either way it's gonna look majorly weird.
Spike: Whereas the name 'Buffy' gives it that touch of classic elegance.
Buffy: What's wrong with 'Buffy'?
Giles: Ah, such a good question.
Spike: This is the crack team that foils my every plan? I am deeply shamed.
Buffy (about Willow's spell): I probably only escaped because I'm the Slayer. Some kind of natural immunity.
Xander: Yeah, right, you're marrying Spike because you're so right for each other.
Buffy: Xander!
Spike: That's it, you're off the usher list.
Buffy: Spike, these are my friends. Besides, it's kind of my job.
Spike: For now.
Buffy: What, you want me to stop working?
Spike: Let's see. Do I want you to give up killing my friends? Yeah, I've given it some thought.
Spike: Sometimes I like to crumble the Weetabix in the blood. Gives it a little texture.
Giles: Since the picture you just painted means that I will never touch food of any kind again, you'll just have to pick it up yourself.
Spike: Sissy.
Anya: You don't need me. All you care about is lots of orgasms.
(Giles and Spike stare at them.)
Xander: OK, remember how we talked about private conversations? How they're less private when they're in front of my friends?
Spike: Oh, we're not your friends; go on.
Spike (about Xander and Anya): I'm not having these two shag while I'm tied to a chair three feet away.
Spike: Like I'd bite you anyway.
Xander: Oh, you would!
Spike: Not bloody likely.
Xander: I happen to be very biteable, pal. I'm moist, and delicious.
Spike: All right, yeah, fine. You're a nummy treat.
Xander: And don't you forget it!
Spike (imitating Anya in a girly voice): Xander, don't you care about me?
Xander: Shut up.
Spike: We never talk.
Xander: Shut! Up!
Spike: Xaan-der...
Xander: Shutup!
Spike: My sodding sleeping chair's bloody... sodden.
Spike: Do I look like a plumber to you?
Xander: No, you look like a big mooch who doesn't lift a finger around here.
Xander (Upon finding Spike trying to stake himself): We've shared a lot here. You should have trusted me enough to do it for you.
Willow: Xander!
Xander: What? He wants to die, I wanna help...
Willow: It's ooky! We know him! We can't just let him poof himself!
Spike: Oh, but you can. You know I'd drain you drier than the Sahara if I had half a chance.
Spike: Stuck in this basement washing skivvies for a blighter I wouldn't have bothered to bite a few months ago.
Xander: Hey!
Xander: Think of the happy. If we don't find what we're looking for, we're facing the apocalypse.
Spike (cheering up): Really? You're not just saying that?
Spike (to Willow and Xander): Buffy fights the forces of evil. You're just her groupies.
Spike (on his newly regained bad-assness): That's right! I'm back and I'm a bloody animal! Yeah!
Spike (in a very bad Midwestern accent): Me? No. No, sir. I'm just an ol' pal of Xander's here.
Listen to Spike's bad accent
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Spike: I say we go out there and kick a little demon ass! What, can't go without your Buffy? Is that it? Too chicken? Let's find her! She is the Chosen One, after all. Come one, vampires, rrrr, nasty! Let's annihilate them. For justice, and for... the safety of puppies, and Christmas, right? Let's fight that evil! Let's kill something! Oh, come on!
That's all for now, folks!
Angelique: I love that one! I'm so upset I didn't remember it!
Here's some more:
Angelus: Dear Buffy. I'm still trying to decide the best way to send my regards.
Spike: Why don't you rip her lungs out? It might make an impression.
Angelus: Lacks... poetry.
Spike: It doesn't have to. What rhymes with lungs?
Spike: Are you insane?! We're supposed to kill the bitch, not leave gag gifts in the friends' beds.
Drusilla: But, Spike, the bad teacher was going to restore Angel's soul.
Spike: What if she did? If you ask me, I find myself preferring the old Buffy-whipped Angelus. This new, improved one is not playing with a full sack. I love a good slaughter as much as the next bloke, but his little pranks will only leave us with one incredibly brassed-off Slayer!
Angelus: Don't worry, roller boy. I've got everything under control.
Angelus: You can see all that in your head?
Spike: No, you ninny. She read it in the morning paper.
Spike: It's a big rock. I can't wait to tell my friends. They don't have a rock this big.
Spike: Mmm. The demon wakes up, and wackiness ensues.
Spike: We like to talk big. Vampires do. 'I'm going to destroy the world.' That's just tough guy talk. Strutting around with your friends over a pint of blood. The truth is, I like this world. You've got... dog racing, Manchester United. And you've got people. Billions of people walking around like Happy Meals with legs. It's all right here. But then someone comes along with a vision. With a real... passion for destruction. Angel could pull it off. Goodbye, Piccadilly. Farewell, Leicester Bloody Square. You know what I'm saying?
Spike: Dru bagged a Slayer? She didn't tell me! Hey, good for her! Though not from your perspective, I suppose.
Angelus: Keep out of it, sit 'n' spin.
Spike: Look, you cut him up, you'll never get your answers.
Angelus: Since when did *you* become so levelheaded?
Spike: Right about the time you became so pig-headed. You have your way with him, you'll never get to destroy the world. And I don't fancy spending the next month trying to get librarian out of the carpet.
Spike: She just left. She didn't even care enough to cut off my head or set me on fire. I mean, is that too much to ask? You know? Some little sign that she cared?
Angel: Spike.
Joyce: Oh, my God. Get out of here!
Spike: Yeah. You're not invited.
Joyce: He's crazy. He'll kill us.
Spike: Not while I breathe. Well, actually, I don't breathe.
Angel: Joyce, listen to me.
Joyce: You get out of this house, or I will stake you myself.
Spike: You're a very bad man.
Angel: Joyce, you can't trust him. Invite me in. You touch her, and I'll cut your head off!
Spike: Yeah? You and what army?
Buffy: That would be me. Angel, why don't you come on in?
Spike: I used to bring her rats. With the morning paper.
Buffy: Great. More moping. That's gonna get her back.
Spike: The spell's gonna get her back.
Angel: Lot of trouble for somebody who doesn't even care about you.
Spike: Shut your gob!
Angel: She really is just kind of fickle.
Spike: What do you know? It's your fault, the both of you! She belongs with me. I'm nothing without her.
Buffy: That I'll have to agree with. You're pathetic, you know that? You're not even a loser anymore, you're a shell of a loser.
Spike: Yeah. You're one to talk.
Buffy: Meaning?
Spike: The last time I looked in on you two, you were fighting to the death. Now you're back making googly-eyes at each other like nothing happened. Makes me want to heave.
Buffy: I don't know what you're talking about.
Spike: Oh, yeah. You're just friends.
Angel: That's right.
Spike: You're not friends. You'll never be friends. You'll be in love till it kills you both. You'll fight, and you'll shag, and you'll hate each other till it makes you quiver, but you'll never be friends. Love isn't brains, children, it's blood...blood screaming inside you to work its will. I may be love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it.
Spike: This should be a kick.
Buffy: I violently dislike you.
Spike: Oh, yeah. You two. Just friends. No danger there.
Spike: I'm really glad I came here, you know? I've been all wrongheaded about this. Weeping, crawling, blaming everybody else. I want Dru back, I've just gotta be the man I was, the man she loved. I'm gonna do what I shoulda done in the first place: I'll find her, wherever she is, tie her up, torture her until she likes me again.
Harmony: Is Antonio Banderas a vampire?
Spike: No.
Harmony: Oh. Can I make him a vampire?
Spike: No. Wait, on second thought, yeah, go do that. Take your time. Do Melanie and the kids as well.
Spike: What a fantastic day. Birds singin', squirrels makin' lots of rotten little squirrels, the sun beaming down in a nice non-fatal way. It's very exciting. I can't wait to see if I freckle.
Spike (after Buffy stakes him): Oh, do it again. It tickles. You know, in a good way.
Buffy: The Gem.
Spike: Oh yeah, the Gem of Amara. Official sponsor of my killing you.
Spike (to Buffy behind her back, out of earshot): Watch your mouth, little girl. You should know better than to tempt the Fates that way. 'Cause the Big Bad is back, and this time it's... varghhhhh! (As he's being shocked with a taser.)
Spike (about Buffy): I always worried what would happen when that bitch got some funding.
Spike: I don't understand. This sort of thing's never happened to me before.
Willow: Maybe you were nervous.
Spike: I felt all right when I started. Let's try again.
(He tries, but he can't do it.)
Spike: Damn it!
Willow: Maybe you're trying too hard. Doesn't this happen to every vampire?
Spike: Not to me, it doesn't!
Willow: It's me, isn't it?
Spike: What are you talking about?
Willow: Well, you came looking for Buffy, then settled. You didn't want to bite me, I just happened to be around.
Spike: Piffle.
Willow: I know I'm not the kind of girl vamps like to sink their teeth into. It's always like, 'Oh, you're like a sister to me,' or, 'Oh, you're such a good friend.'
Spike: Don't be ridiculous. I'd bite you in a heartbeat.
Willow: Really?
Spike: Thought about it.
Willow: When?
Spike: Remember last year? You had on that fuzzy pink number with the lilac underneath. (Gives her a sexy look.)
Willow: I never would have guessed. You played the bloodlust kinda cool.
Spike: Mmmm. I hate being obvious. Being all fangy and 'Rrrr.' Takes the mystery out.
Willow: But if you could...
Spike: If I could, yeah.
Willow: You know, this doesn't make you any less terrifying.
Spike: Don't patronize me! (Paces around the room.) I'm only a hundred and twenty-six!
Willow: You're being too hard on yourself. Why don't we wait a half an hour and try again? (Makes a funny face.) Or... (Grabs a lamp and whacks him.)
Spike: What part of 'help me!' do you not understand?
Buffy: The part where I help you.
Spike (on his implant): I'm saying that Spike had a little trip to the vet, and now he doesn't chase the other puppies anymore.
Spike (regarding Xander): Oh, leave that one! He looks like he's ready to drop any minute, and I think I can eat someone if he's already dead.
Spike: A bear! You made a bear!
Buffy: I didn't mean to!
Spike: Undo it! Undo it!:
Giles: We can't let you go until we're sure that you're impotent or "”
Spike: Hey!
Giles: Sorry, poor choice of words. Until we know that you're...
Buffy: Flaccid?
Spike: You are one step away, missy!
Buffy: Giles help! He's gonna scold me!
Buffy: Look at my poor neck "” all bare, and tender, and exposed. All that blood, just pumping away.
Spike: Giles, make her stop!
Giles (to Willow): If those two don't kill each other, I might lend a hand.
Spike: Passions is on! Timmy's down the bloody well, and if you make me miss it I'll "”
Giles: Do what? Lick me to death?
Spike: You're not gonna do anything to me. You don't have the stones!
Buffy: Oh, I got the stones! I've got a whole bunch of... stones!
Spike: When I get this spell reversed, they'll be finding your body for weeks.
Buffy: Oh, make a move. Please. I'm dying for a good slay!
Buffy: It's just so sudden, I don't know what to say.
Spike: Just say yes, and make me the happiest man on earth.
Buffy: Oh, Spike, of course it's yes!
Giles: Are you helping me?
Spike: Well, it's almost like you're my father-in-law, isn't it?
Buffy: Honey, we need to talk about the invitations. Now, do you want to be 'William the Bloody' or just 'Spike,' because either way it's gonna look majorly weird.
Spike: Whereas the name 'Buffy' gives it that touch of classic elegance.
Buffy: What's wrong with 'Buffy'?
Giles: Ah, such a good question.
Spike: This is the crack team that foils my every plan? I am deeply shamed.
Buffy (about Willow's spell): I probably only escaped because I'm the Slayer. Some kind of natural immunity.
Xander: Yeah, right, you're marrying Spike because you're so right for each other.
Buffy: Xander!
Spike: That's it, you're off the usher list.
Buffy: Spike, these are my friends. Besides, it's kind of my job.
Spike: For now.
Buffy: What, you want me to stop working?
Spike: Let's see. Do I want you to give up killing my friends? Yeah, I've given it some thought.
Spike: Sometimes I like to crumble the Weetabix in the blood. Gives it a little texture.
Giles: Since the picture you just painted means that I will never touch food of any kind again, you'll just have to pick it up yourself.
Spike: Sissy.
Anya: You don't need me. All you care about is lots of orgasms.
(Giles and Spike stare at them.)
Xander: OK, remember how we talked about private conversations? How they're less private when they're in front of my friends?
Spike: Oh, we're not your friends; go on.
Spike (about Xander and Anya): I'm not having these two shag while I'm tied to a chair three feet away.
Spike: Like I'd bite you anyway.
Xander: Oh, you would!
Spike: Not bloody likely.
Xander: I happen to be very biteable, pal. I'm moist, and delicious.
Spike: All right, yeah, fine. You're a nummy treat.
Xander: And don't you forget it!
Spike (imitating Anya in a girly voice): Xander, don't you care about me?
Xander: Shut up.
Spike: We never talk.
Xander: Shut! Up!
Spike: Xaan-der...
Xander: Shutup!
Spike: My sodding sleeping chair's bloody... sodden.
Spike: Do I look like a plumber to you?
Xander: No, you look like a big mooch who doesn't lift a finger around here.
Xander (Upon finding Spike trying to stake himself): We've shared a lot here. You should have trusted me enough to do it for you.
Willow: Xander!
Xander: What? He wants to die, I wanna help...
Willow: It's ooky! We know him! We can't just let him poof himself!
Spike: Oh, but you can. You know I'd drain you drier than the Sahara if I had half a chance.
Spike: Stuck in this basement washing skivvies for a blighter I wouldn't have bothered to bite a few months ago.
Xander: Hey!
Xander: Think of the happy. If we don't find what we're looking for, we're facing the apocalypse.
Spike (cheering up): Really? You're not just saying that?
Spike (to Willow and Xander): Buffy fights the forces of evil. You're just her groupies.
Spike (on his newly regained bad-assness): That's right! I'm back and I'm a bloody animal! Yeah!
Spike (in a very bad Midwestern accent): Me? No. No, sir. I'm just an ol' pal of Xander's here.
Listen to Spike's bad accent
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PW:55qq
Spike: I say we go out there and kick a little demon ass! What, can't go without your Buffy? Is that it? Too chicken? Let's find her! She is the Chosen One, after all. Come one, vampires, rrrr, nasty! Let's annihilate them. For justice, and for... the safety of puppies, and Christmas, right? Let's fight that evil! Let's kill something! Oh, come on!
That's all for now, folks!
Spikeaholic
The Buffy Bot
sorry bout puting the other quotes in I had a friend round walked out the room for a bit then the next thing i know ...............i
wriiten a load of things
Spike: Someones in the ceiling
someone wasnt worthy
Spike: A Slayer with family and friends. That sure as hell wasn't in the brochure
Spike: Out! This is my place! You need permission to be here! You need a special slip with a stamp!
Spike: Thought I was gonna leave town? It's a free country. Free party. If you want me to leave, you can put your hands on my hot, tight little body and make me.
Spike: You threw me through a window! What's that about?
April: You cannot make those suggestions to me. I have a boyfriend. Warren is my boyfriend.
Spike: You know what? My bleeding sympathies to Warren!
Spike: Was that your best, Slayer?
Buffybot: No.
Spike: Why not?
Buffybot: I wanna hurt you, but I can't resist the sinister attraction of your cold and muscular body!
Buffybot: You're evil.
Spike: And that excites you?
Buffybot: It excites me, it terrifies me... I try so hard to resist you and I can't.
Spike: Yeah?
Buffybot: Darn your sinister attraction!
Spike: Are you afraid of me?
Buffybot (smiling enthusiastically): Yes.
Buffybot: Oh Spike, devour me!
Spike (rolling onto her): Alright.
Buffybot: Spike, I can't help myself! I love you!
Spike: You're mine, Buffy.
Buffybot: Should I start this program over?
Spike: Shh! No programs, don't use that word. Just be Buffy.
Buffybot (to Xander and Anya, on Spike's approach): Spike! It's Spike. And he's wearing a coat.
Buffybot (having sex with Spike in the graveyard): Oh Spike, you're the big bad! You're the big bad!
Glory: I am a God.
Spike: The God of what, bad home perms?
Spike: Mark my words, the Slayer is going to kick your skanky, lopsided ass "” (Concerned, Glory looks at her ass.) "” back to whatever place would take a cheap, whorish, fashion-victim ex-God like you.
Buffy as Buffybot: Spike! You're covered in sexy wounds!
Spike (Buffy as the Buffybot, prompts Spike to explain why he didn't tell Glory who the key was.): Because Buffy "” the other, not-so-pleasant Buffy... anything happened to Dawn, it'd destroy her, and I couldn't live with her being in that much pain. I'd let Glory kill me first. Nearly bloody did.
Dawn: You wanna know what I'm scared of, Spike? Me. Right now, Glory thinks Tara's the Key. But I'm the Key, Spike. I am. And anything that happens to Tara... is 'cause of me. Your bruises, your limp... that's all me, too. I'm like a lightning rod for pain, and hurt... and everyone around me suffers and dies. I must be something so horrible to cause so much pain and evil.
Spike: Rot.
Dawn: What do you know?
Spike: I'm a vampire. I know something about evil. You're not evil.
Dawn: Maybe I'm not evil. But I don't think I can be good.
Spike (after a pause): Well, I'm not good, and I'm okay.
Buffy (about Willow): She was looking to go all payback-y on Glory for a minute, but I cooled her down a little. Actually a lot.
Spike: So she's not gonna do anything rash then.
Buffy: No. I explained there was no point.
Spike (skeptical): Mm-hmm.
Buffy: What?
Spike: You"” so you're saying that a powerful and mightily pissed off witch was plannin' on going' and spillin' herself a few pints of god blood until you, what... "explained"?
Buffy: You think she"” no. I told Willow it would be like suicide.
Spike: I'd do it. (He looks away.) Right person. Person I loved. (He looks back at her.) I'd do it.
wriiten a load of things
Spike: Someones in the ceiling
someone wasnt worthy
Spike: A Slayer with family and friends. That sure as hell wasn't in the brochure
Spike: Out! This is my place! You need permission to be here! You need a special slip with a stamp!
Spike: Thought I was gonna leave town? It's a free country. Free party. If you want me to leave, you can put your hands on my hot, tight little body and make me.
Spike: You threw me through a window! What's that about?
April: You cannot make those suggestions to me. I have a boyfriend. Warren is my boyfriend.
Spike: You know what? My bleeding sympathies to Warren!
Spike: Was that your best, Slayer?
Buffybot: No.
Spike: Why not?
Buffybot: I wanna hurt you, but I can't resist the sinister attraction of your cold and muscular body!
Buffybot: You're evil.
Spike: And that excites you?
Buffybot: It excites me, it terrifies me... I try so hard to resist you and I can't.
Spike: Yeah?
Buffybot: Darn your sinister attraction!
Spike: Are you afraid of me?
Buffybot (smiling enthusiastically): Yes.
Buffybot: Oh Spike, devour me!
Spike (rolling onto her): Alright.
Buffybot: Spike, I can't help myself! I love you!
Spike: You're mine, Buffy.
Buffybot: Should I start this program over?
Spike: Shh! No programs, don't use that word. Just be Buffy.
Buffybot (to Xander and Anya, on Spike's approach): Spike! It's Spike. And he's wearing a coat.
Buffybot (having sex with Spike in the graveyard): Oh Spike, you're the big bad! You're the big bad!
Glory: I am a God.
Spike: The God of what, bad home perms?
Spike: Mark my words, the Slayer is going to kick your skanky, lopsided ass "” (Concerned, Glory looks at her ass.) "” back to whatever place would take a cheap, whorish, fashion-victim ex-God like you.
Buffy as Buffybot: Spike! You're covered in sexy wounds!
Spike (Buffy as the Buffybot, prompts Spike to explain why he didn't tell Glory who the key was.): Because Buffy "” the other, not-so-pleasant Buffy... anything happened to Dawn, it'd destroy her, and I couldn't live with her being in that much pain. I'd let Glory kill me first. Nearly bloody did.
Dawn: You wanna know what I'm scared of, Spike? Me. Right now, Glory thinks Tara's the Key. But I'm the Key, Spike. I am. And anything that happens to Tara... is 'cause of me. Your bruises, your limp... that's all me, too. I'm like a lightning rod for pain, and hurt... and everyone around me suffers and dies. I must be something so horrible to cause so much pain and evil.
Spike: Rot.
Dawn: What do you know?
Spike: I'm a vampire. I know something about evil. You're not evil.
Dawn: Maybe I'm not evil. But I don't think I can be good.
Spike (after a pause): Well, I'm not good, and I'm okay.
Buffy (about Willow): She was looking to go all payback-y on Glory for a minute, but I cooled her down a little. Actually a lot.
Spike: So she's not gonna do anything rash then.
Buffy: No. I explained there was no point.
Spike (skeptical): Mm-hmm.
Buffy: What?
Spike: You"” so you're saying that a powerful and mightily pissed off witch was plannin' on going' and spillin' herself a few pints of god blood until you, what... "explained"?
Buffy: You think she"” no. I told Willow it would be like suicide.
Spike: I'd do it. (He looks away.) Right person. Person I loved. (He looks back at her.) I'd do it.
Spikeaholic
The Buffy Bot
smashed
here are some more from smashed
(phone rings)
Buffy: Hello Magic Box
Spike: Slayer
Buffy: Spike?
Spike: meet me in the cemetery at noon come alone
Buffy: Spike?
Spike: Bloody hell! Yes it's me
Buffy: Your calling me on the phone
Spike: Just be there
Buffy: Why? Are you helping again? Do you have a lead on this whole frost monster thingy
Spike: some thing like that! Yeah! Thought you might be up 4 a little grunt work
Buffy: What NO! no grunting
Spike: I was talking shop love but if you got other idears you me a cosy little tomb with a veiw
(Buffy hangs up)
Xander: So what did captain peroxide want?
Buffy: Oh he just wanted to know if I wanted to patrol you know for the monster but I told him"¦I WOULD NOT
Spike: slayer
Buffy: and so my night is complete
Spike: you never showed
Buffy: sorry a little busy actually doing stuff
Spike: you shouldn't be so clip love
Buffy: what you gonna do walk behind me to death
Spike: I'm saying things might be a little different, you ought to be careful
Buffy: enough!
(Spike steps in front of Buffy)
Buffy: Get out of my way!
Spike: or you'll do what?
(Buffy hits him and he strikes back)
Spike: oh the pain the pain"¦. Is gone! Guess what I just found out looks like I'm not as toothless as you thought sweetheart
Buffy: how?
Spike: don't you get it, you came back wrong!
(Buffy hits him and he pushes her up towards the fence)
Buffy: it's a trick u did something to the chip
Spike: no its not me its you, just you in fact that's the funny part that's why this doesn't hurt me you're the one that's changed came back a little less human than you were.
Buffy: your wrong
Spike: then how come your so spooked love and why can I (hits Buffy) do that?
Buffy: your wrong
(Fight scene)
Spike: poor little lost girl (swings from the chandelier) she doesn't fit in anywhere she got no-one to love
Buffy: me, I'm lost look at you, you idiot (throws Spike into a fire place) poor Spikie cant be a human cant be a vampire where the hell do you fit in? Your job is to kill the slayer and all you can do is follow me around making moon eyes
Spike: (gets to his feet) I'm in love with you
Buffy: your in love with pain admit it it you like it because you enjoy getting beat down so really who's screwed up?
Spike: (grabs her) hello! Vampire! I'm supposed to be trading on the dark side (throws her into a wall then picks her up and throws her into the middle of the room) what's your excuse? (Buffy kicks him than jumps on top of him)
(fight on the stairs)
Spike: I wasn't planning on hurting you"¦ much
Buffy: you haven't even come close to hurting me
Spike: afraid to give me a chance?
(Buffy kicks him over to a wall)
Spike: afraid I'm gonna"¦"¦
(kiss)
here are some more from smashed
(phone rings)
Buffy: Hello Magic Box
Spike: Slayer
Buffy: Spike?
Spike: meet me in the cemetery at noon come alone
Buffy: Spike?
Spike: Bloody hell! Yes it's me
Buffy: Your calling me on the phone
Spike: Just be there
Buffy: Why? Are you helping again? Do you have a lead on this whole frost monster thingy
Spike: some thing like that! Yeah! Thought you might be up 4 a little grunt work
Buffy: What NO! no grunting
Spike: I was talking shop love but if you got other idears you me a cosy little tomb with a veiw
(Buffy hangs up)
Xander: So what did captain peroxide want?
Buffy: Oh he just wanted to know if I wanted to patrol you know for the monster but I told him"¦I WOULD NOT
Spike: slayer
Buffy: and so my night is complete
Spike: you never showed
Buffy: sorry a little busy actually doing stuff
Spike: you shouldn't be so clip love
Buffy: what you gonna do walk behind me to death
Spike: I'm saying things might be a little different, you ought to be careful
Buffy: enough!
(Spike steps in front of Buffy)
Buffy: Get out of my way!
Spike: or you'll do what?
(Buffy hits him and he strikes back)
Spike: oh the pain the pain"¦. Is gone! Guess what I just found out looks like I'm not as toothless as you thought sweetheart
Buffy: how?
Spike: don't you get it, you came back wrong!
(Buffy hits him and he pushes her up towards the fence)
Buffy: it's a trick u did something to the chip
Spike: no its not me its you, just you in fact that's the funny part that's why this doesn't hurt me you're the one that's changed came back a little less human than you were.
Buffy: your wrong
Spike: then how come your so spooked love and why can I (hits Buffy) do that?
Buffy: your wrong
(Fight scene)
Spike: poor little lost girl (swings from the chandelier) she doesn't fit in anywhere she got no-one to love
Buffy: me, I'm lost look at you, you idiot (throws Spike into a fire place) poor Spikie cant be a human cant be a vampire where the hell do you fit in? Your job is to kill the slayer and all you can do is follow me around making moon eyes
Spike: (gets to his feet) I'm in love with you
Buffy: your in love with pain admit it it you like it because you enjoy getting beat down so really who's screwed up?
Spike: (grabs her) hello! Vampire! I'm supposed to be trading on the dark side (throws her into a wall then picks her up and throws her into the middle of the room) what's your excuse? (Buffy kicks him than jumps on top of him)
(fight on the stairs)
Spike: I wasn't planning on hurting you"¦ much
Buffy: you haven't even come close to hurting me
Spike: afraid to give me a chance?
(Buffy kicks him over to a wall)
Spike: afraid I'm gonna"¦"¦
(kiss)
hotaru anne
The Lone Wanderer
those are great spike convos!
gotta love that one 😀
Originally posted by Angelique
My fav is still the one from "No Place like Home":
Buffy: Spike, what are you doing here? - Five words or less..
Spike: Out-for-a-walk-bitch
gotta love that one 😀
spikes_hell_bit
†Spikes_Hell_Bitâ€
phrases
one of my favorite phrases from spike is
"i maybe loves bitch, but least i admit it" - season 3
the best has got to be the one in angel when he on the building. which is kewl cos i no it off by heart yay 🙂🙂 PEOPLE LAUGH AT ME WHEN I DO IT but its kewl!!!
"how can i thank you, you mysteries black clad hunk of a night thing, no need little lady your tears of graditute are enough for me, you see i was once a bad ass vampire but love and a pesky curse defanged me and now im just a big fluffy puppy with bad teeth, "no not the hair! never the hair!", but there must be some way i can show my appreciation, NO! helping those in need my job, and working up a load of sexual and prancing away like a magnificiant poof is truely thanks enough, i understand i have a nephew whos gay so.... "say no more evils stil a foot and im almost out of that nancy boy hair gel i like so much, quickly to the angel mobile AWAY!!"
one of my favorite phrases from spike is
"i maybe loves bitch, but least i admit it" - season 3
the best has got to be the one in angel when he on the building. which is kewl cos i no it off by heart yay 🙂🙂 PEOPLE LAUGH AT ME WHEN I DO IT but its kewl!!!
"how can i thank you, you mysteries black clad hunk of a night thing, no need little lady your tears of graditute are enough for me, you see i was once a bad ass vampire but love and a pesky curse defanged me and now im just a big fluffy puppy with bad teeth, "no not the hair! never the hair!", but there must be some way i can show my appreciation, NO! helping those in need my job, and working up a load of sexual and prancing away like a magnificiant poof is truely thanks enough, i understand i have a nephew whos gay so.... "say no more evils stil a foot and im almost out of that nancy boy hair gel i like so much, quickly to the angel mobile AWAY!!"
spike's_bitca
Thank You
I'm a big fan of "It's a big rock. I can't wait to tell my friends about it. They haven't got a rock this big." or words to that effect
Basically I'm a sucker for absolutely everything he says in his SEXY (alas, fake) accent. I'm also more apt to like it if he's shirtless-maybe that's just me!
Basically I'm a sucker for absolutely everything he says in his SEXY (alas, fake) accent. I'm also more apt to like it if he's shirtless-maybe that's just me!
VampireSoul
Townie
Spike : Birds singing, squirrels making lots of rotten little squirrels. Sun beaming down in a nice, non-fatal way. It's very exciting, I can't wait to see if I freckle.
Spike :Thats Right, The Gem of Amara, Official sponsor, of my killing you.
Harsh Light Of Day.
Spike :Thats Right, The Gem of Amara, Official sponsor, of my killing you.
Harsh Light Of Day.
A
Alyson
Guest
He he, spike is soo funny, i like his accent, anyway I got a few:
Anya: Ahh
Spike: Oh, It's you (lumpies go)
Anya: Spike, What are you doing? You made me yell really high
Spike: Hey yea, I did I scared you. Give me money.
Anya: I'm not paying you from scaring me.
Spike: Your not paying me, I'm robbing you.
Anya: You can't hurt me because you got that chip in your brain, also I like my money the way it is. And it's mine (spike pretends to attack)
Anya: Oh now, come one, your not even bumpy anymore!
Spike: Oh (feels his head) I was just a minute ago, hang on Get me mad again
Anya: Does this really work? Scaring people into giving you there money
Spike: Yea it Works keeps me in blood and bears, plus you know funny watching the little humans quail, I'm beginning to understand why your so friendless
Spike: look who's talking I don't see droppy boy on your arm, did he have better things to do?
Xander: Now who's with me?
Spike: I am, I know I'm not the first choice for heroics, and buffy's tried to kill me more than once and I don't fancy a single one of you at all "“ but "“ actually all of that sounds convincing
--Where the wild thing are --
Spike: Oh it's you
Xander: I saw you in the cemetery with Buffy
Spike: Yea? I can't see that it is any businesses of yours
Xander: It is my business because Buffy is my friend, and she's gone through some stuff lately that well it's affected her and your taking advantage of her
Spike: She's upset about her mom and if she turns to me for comfort well I'm no going to deny it to her, I'm not a monster
Xander: Yes you are a monster, vampires are monsters, and they make monster movies about them
Spike: Well yea, you got me there.
Xander: (pushes him against the wall) Spike, Buffy has lots of friends and we love her very much and we'll do what ever it takes to protect her, now if that means killing you then well that'ss just a bonus
--Intervention--
Spike: Sun sets and she appears, come to say you need me?
Buffy: So you know what's going on?
Spike: Well I've seen some damn funny things the last 2 days, 600-sharago demon making like sera that one I'll stay with you. I remain immune happy to say, drink?
Buffy: A world of no, so any idea what's causing this?
Spike: Oh so you have just come here to pump me for information.
Buffy: What else would I pump you for"¦. I really just said that didn't I?
Spike: Don't know a thing, glad you could stop bye
Buffy: What's up your all bad-moodie?
Spike: Well I'm a boy with a small talk.
Spike: strong - some day he'll be a real boy.
--Once more with feeling--
Anya: Ahh
Spike: Oh, It's you (lumpies go)
Anya: Spike, What are you doing? You made me yell really high
Spike: Hey yea, I did I scared you. Give me money.
Anya: I'm not paying you from scaring me.
Spike: Your not paying me, I'm robbing you.
Anya: You can't hurt me because you got that chip in your brain, also I like my money the way it is. And it's mine (spike pretends to attack)
Anya: Oh now, come one, your not even bumpy anymore!
Spike: Oh (feels his head) I was just a minute ago, hang on Get me mad again
Anya: Does this really work? Scaring people into giving you there money
Spike: Yea it Works keeps me in blood and bears, plus you know funny watching the little humans quail, I'm beginning to understand why your so friendless
Spike: look who's talking I don't see droppy boy on your arm, did he have better things to do?
Xander: Now who's with me?
Spike: I am, I know I'm not the first choice for heroics, and buffy's tried to kill me more than once and I don't fancy a single one of you at all "“ but "“ actually all of that sounds convincing
--Where the wild thing are --
Spike: Oh it's you
Xander: I saw you in the cemetery with Buffy
Spike: Yea? I can't see that it is any businesses of yours
Xander: It is my business because Buffy is my friend, and she's gone through some stuff lately that well it's affected her and your taking advantage of her
Spike: She's upset about her mom and if she turns to me for comfort well I'm no going to deny it to her, I'm not a monster
Xander: Yes you are a monster, vampires are monsters, and they make monster movies about them
Spike: Well yea, you got me there.
Xander: (pushes him against the wall) Spike, Buffy has lots of friends and we love her very much and we'll do what ever it takes to protect her, now if that means killing you then well that'ss just a bonus
--Intervention--
Spike: Sun sets and she appears, come to say you need me?
Buffy: So you know what's going on?
Spike: Well I've seen some damn funny things the last 2 days, 600-sharago demon making like sera that one I'll stay with you. I remain immune happy to say, drink?
Buffy: A world of no, so any idea what's causing this?
Spike: Oh so you have just come here to pump me for information.
Buffy: What else would I pump you for"¦. I really just said that didn't I?
Spike: Don't know a thing, glad you could stop bye
Buffy: What's up your all bad-moodie?
Spike: Well I'm a boy with a small talk.
Spike: strong - some day he'll be a real boy.
--Once more with feeling--
A
Alyson
Guest
Hey isn't there already one for the quotes? Oh well here is mine: And Ally cat yours is soo funny!!
Anya: Ahh
Spike: Oh, It's you (lumpies go)
Anya: Spike, What are you doing? You made me yell really high
Spike: Hey yea, I did I scared you. Give me money.
Anya: I'm not paying you from scaring me.
Spike: Your not paying me, I'm robbing you.
Anya: You can't hurt me because you got that chip in your brain, also I like my money the way it is. And it's mine (spike pretends to attack)
Anya: Oh now, come one, your not even bumpy anymore!
Spike: Oh (feels his head) I was just a minute ago, hang on Get me mad again
Anya: Does this really work? Scaring people into giving you there money
Spike: Yea it Works keeps me in blood and bears, plus you know funny watching the little humans quail, I'm beginning to understand why your so friendless
Spike: look who's talking I don't see droppy boy on your arm, did he have better things to do?
Xander: Now who's with me?
Spike: I am, I know I'm not the first choice for heroics, and buffy's tried to kill me more than once and I don't fancy a single one of you at all "“ but "“ actually all of that sounds convincing
--Where the wild thing are --
Spike: Oh it's you
Xander: I saw you in the cemetery with Buffy
Spike: Yea? I can't see that it is any businesses of yours
Xander: It is my business because Buffy is my friend, and she's gone through some stuff lately that well it's affected her and your taking advantage of her
Spike: She's upset about her mom and if she turns to me for comfort well I'm no going to deny it to her, I'm not a monster
Xander: Yes you are a monster, vampires are monsters, and they make monster movies about them
Spike: Well yea, you got me there.
Xander: (pushes him against the wall) Spike, Buffy has lots of friends and we love her very much and we'll do what ever it takes to protect her, now if that means killing you then well that'ss just a bonus
--Intervention--
Spike: Sun sets and she appears, come to say you need me?
Buffy: So you know what's going on?
Spike: Well I've seen some damn funny things the last 2 days, 600-sharago demon making like sera that one I'll stay with you. I remain immune happy to say, drink?
Buffy: A world of no, so any idea what's causing this?
Spike: Oh so you have just come here to pump me for information.
Buffy: What else would I pump you for"¦. I really just said that didn't I?
Spike: Don't know a thing, glad you could stop bye
Buffy: What's up your all bad-moodie?
Spike: Well I'm a boy with a small talk.
Spike: strong - some day he'll be a real boy.
--Once more with feeling--
Spike: Nothing to be worried about, no-ones going to hurt you.
Dawn: The same no-one who did that to you?
Spike: what these? this , it's just a few bruises, nothing to ride home about. Hey chin-up, don't get scared. Maybe glory dosen't want to kill you maybe it something"¦
Dawn: Worse? Do you wanna know what I'm scared of spike? Me! Right now glory thinks tera's the key, but I'm the key, spike, I am and anything that happens to teroa is because of me, your bruises, your limb, that's all me too. I'm like a lightning rod for pain and hurt and everyone around me suffers and dies I must be something so horrible to cause so much pain and evil
Spike: Rot
Dawn: what do you know?
S: I'm a vampire I know some about evil, your not evil
Dawn: Maybe I'm not evil, But I don't think I can be good.
Spike: Well I'm not good, and I'm ok
Anya: Ahh
Spike: Oh, It's you (lumpies go)
Anya: Spike, What are you doing? You made me yell really high
Spike: Hey yea, I did I scared you. Give me money.
Anya: I'm not paying you from scaring me.
Spike: Your not paying me, I'm robbing you.
Anya: You can't hurt me because you got that chip in your brain, also I like my money the way it is. And it's mine (spike pretends to attack)
Anya: Oh now, come one, your not even bumpy anymore!
Spike: Oh (feels his head) I was just a minute ago, hang on Get me mad again
Anya: Does this really work? Scaring people into giving you there money
Spike: Yea it Works keeps me in blood and bears, plus you know funny watching the little humans quail, I'm beginning to understand why your so friendless
Spike: look who's talking I don't see droppy boy on your arm, did he have better things to do?
Xander: Now who's with me?
Spike: I am, I know I'm not the first choice for heroics, and buffy's tried to kill me more than once and I don't fancy a single one of you at all "“ but "“ actually all of that sounds convincing
--Where the wild thing are --
Spike: Oh it's you
Xander: I saw you in the cemetery with Buffy
Spike: Yea? I can't see that it is any businesses of yours
Xander: It is my business because Buffy is my friend, and she's gone through some stuff lately that well it's affected her and your taking advantage of her
Spike: She's upset about her mom and if she turns to me for comfort well I'm no going to deny it to her, I'm not a monster
Xander: Yes you are a monster, vampires are monsters, and they make monster movies about them
Spike: Well yea, you got me there.
Xander: (pushes him against the wall) Spike, Buffy has lots of friends and we love her very much and we'll do what ever it takes to protect her, now if that means killing you then well that'ss just a bonus
--Intervention--
Spike: Sun sets and she appears, come to say you need me?
Buffy: So you know what's going on?
Spike: Well I've seen some damn funny things the last 2 days, 600-sharago demon making like sera that one I'll stay with you. I remain immune happy to say, drink?
Buffy: A world of no, so any idea what's causing this?
Spike: Oh so you have just come here to pump me for information.
Buffy: What else would I pump you for"¦. I really just said that didn't I?
Spike: Don't know a thing, glad you could stop bye
Buffy: What's up your all bad-moodie?
Spike: Well I'm a boy with a small talk.
Spike: strong - some day he'll be a real boy.
--Once more with feeling--
Spike: Nothing to be worried about, no-ones going to hurt you.
Dawn: The same no-one who did that to you?
Spike: what these? this , it's just a few bruises, nothing to ride home about. Hey chin-up, don't get scared. Maybe glory dosen't want to kill you maybe it something"¦
Dawn: Worse? Do you wanna know what I'm scared of spike? Me! Right now glory thinks tera's the key, but I'm the key, spike, I am and anything that happens to teroa is because of me, your bruises, your limb, that's all me too. I'm like a lightning rod for pain and hurt and everyone around me suffers and dies I must be something so horrible to cause so much pain and evil
Spike: Rot
Dawn: what do you know?
S: I'm a vampire I know some about evil, your not evil
Dawn: Maybe I'm not evil, But I don't think I can be good.
Spike: Well I'm not good, and I'm ok
Spikeaholic
The Buffy Bot
(To a middle-aged man): "I'm a veal kind of guy, you're too old to eat"
(Breaks the man's neck): "But not to kill."
"You know what I find works real good with Slayers?"
"Killing them."
"A Slayer with family and friends. That sure as hell wasn't in the brochure."
"I don't like to brag..."
"Oh who am I kidding; I love to brag."
- School Hard
"Do I have anyone on watch here? Its called security, people. Are you all asleep? Or did we finally find a restaurant that delivers?"
"I've known you for two minutes and I can't stand you. I don't really feature you living forever."
- Spike on Ford's arrival (no not the car) Lie to Me
Willy (Dodgy bar tender): "What're you gonna do with him (Angel) anyway?"
Spike: "I'm thinking - maybe dinner and a movie. I don't know want to rush into anything. I've been hurt, y'know."
"I'll only kill you this once."
- Classic Spike from What's My Line Part 2
"It's paradise! Big windows and lovely gardens. They'll be perfect for when we want the sunlight to kill us."
- on their new home - the mansion during I Only Have Eyes For You
Angelus: "You can see all that in your head"
"Spike: No you ninney, she saw it in the paper"
"We like to talk big, vampires do... The truth is I like this world. We've got dog racing, Manchester United...and we've got millions of people walking around like Happy Meals with legs."
- Both from Becoming Part 1
Joyce: "Have we met?"
Spike : "You hit me with an axe one time. Remember? Get the hell away from my daughter."
"You have your way with him (Giles), you'll never get to destroy the world. And I don't fancy spending next month trying to get librarian out of the carpet."
- Spike talks Angelus out of crushing Giles during Becoming Part 2
Spike (to Dru): "I don't want to hurt you baby."
Drusilla hits him
(Spike hits her back) "Doesn't mean I won't."
- also from Becoming Part 2
Buffy Series 3
Spike on Buffy & Angel's relationship: "You're not friends. You'll never be friends. You'll be in love 'til it kills you both. You'll fight and you'll shag, and you'll hate each other 'til it makes you quiver but you'll never be friends. Love isn't brains, children, it's blood. Blood screaming inside you to work it's will. I may be love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it."
To The Top
Series 4 And Spike Is Back
Listen to me, you stupid bint. This gem is everything. I came back to Sunnydale for it. A place which has witnessed some truely spectacular kickings of my ass. Now, when I have the gem, they all die, don't worry, but until then, stay inside. And, by the way, I would be insanely happy if, from this point on, I heard bugger all about sodding France!
- Spike gets mad at Harmony on his return to Sunnydale during The Harsh Light of Day
Spike: I don't understand. This sort of thing's never happened to me before.
Willow: Maybe you were nervous. You're probably just trying too hard. Doesn't this happen to every vampire?
Spike: Not to me, it doesn't!
- Spike's implant stops him from feasting on Willow during The Initiative
"C'mon! Vampires! Grrr! Let's annhilate them! For justice. And for the safety of...puppies. And Christmas. Right?"
- Spike finds out he can hurt demons, and he has a lot of catching up to do, Doomed
"Talking to Anya about the pre-implant days: You know you take the killing for granted. And then it's gone. And you're like, I wish I'd appreciated it more. Stopped and smelled the corpses."
Xander after deliver a great team talk to the scooby gang:"Who's with me?"
Spike: I am. I know I'm not the first choice for heroics. And Buffy's tried to kill me more than once. And I don't fancy a single one of you at all but...actually all that sounds pretty convincing. (Walks off)
- Where The Wild Things Are
Yeah. Thing about the Slayer is, she's a whiny little thing, but when it comes to fighting she does have a slight tendency to win.
- Spike explains to Adam why he hasn't killed Buffy in The Yoko Factor
To The Top
Series 5 And What Is Spike Doing?
Buffy: Were you born this big a pain in the arse?
Spike: What can I tell you baby, I've always been bad.
London Woman in 1880: "Have you heard, they call him William the Bloody because of his bloody awful poetry"
London man in 1880: "I'd rather have a railway spike through my head than listen to that awful stuff"
Spike: "I'm sorry, did I sully our good name, we're vampires!"
Angelus: All the more reason to use a certain amount of finess
Spike: That stuff's for the frilly cuffs and collars crowd, I'll take a good brawl anyday.
All from Fool for Love
Angel Series 1
Spike's opening commentry of Angels heroics during In The Dark
Spike [Rachel voice]: How can I thank you, you mysterious black-clad hunk of a night-thing?
Spike [Angel voice]: No need, little lady, your tears of grattitude are enough for me. You see I was once a badass vampire, but love and a pesky curse defanged me. No, not the hair! Never the hair!
Spike [Rachel voice]: But there must be some way I can show my appreciation?
Spike [Angel voice]: No, helping those in need's my job and working up a load of sexual tension and prancing away like a magnificent puff is truely thanks enough.
Spike [Rachel voice]: I understand. I have a nephew who is gay, so...
Spike [Angel voice]: Say no more. Evil's still afoot. And I'm almost out of that nancy-boy hair-gel I like so much. Quickly, to the Angel-mobile, away.
(havent read these yet hope their good)
-the buffy bot
(Breaks the man's neck): "But not to kill."
"You know what I find works real good with Slayers?"
"Killing them."
"A Slayer with family and friends. That sure as hell wasn't in the brochure."
"I don't like to brag..."
"Oh who am I kidding; I love to brag."
- School Hard
"Do I have anyone on watch here? Its called security, people. Are you all asleep? Or did we finally find a restaurant that delivers?"
"I've known you for two minutes and I can't stand you. I don't really feature you living forever."
- Spike on Ford's arrival (no not the car) Lie to Me
Willy (Dodgy bar tender): "What're you gonna do with him (Angel) anyway?"
Spike: "I'm thinking - maybe dinner and a movie. I don't know want to rush into anything. I've been hurt, y'know."
"I'll only kill you this once."
- Classic Spike from What's My Line Part 2
"It's paradise! Big windows and lovely gardens. They'll be perfect for when we want the sunlight to kill us."
- on their new home - the mansion during I Only Have Eyes For You
Angelus: "You can see all that in your head"
"Spike: No you ninney, she saw it in the paper"
"We like to talk big, vampires do... The truth is I like this world. We've got dog racing, Manchester United...and we've got millions of people walking around like Happy Meals with legs."
- Both from Becoming Part 1
Joyce: "Have we met?"
Spike : "You hit me with an axe one time. Remember? Get the hell away from my daughter."
"You have your way with him (Giles), you'll never get to destroy the world. And I don't fancy spending next month trying to get librarian out of the carpet."
- Spike talks Angelus out of crushing Giles during Becoming Part 2
Spike (to Dru): "I don't want to hurt you baby."
Drusilla hits him
(Spike hits her back) "Doesn't mean I won't."
- also from Becoming Part 2
Buffy Series 3
Spike on Buffy & Angel's relationship: "You're not friends. You'll never be friends. You'll be in love 'til it kills you both. You'll fight and you'll shag, and you'll hate each other 'til it makes you quiver but you'll never be friends. Love isn't brains, children, it's blood. Blood screaming inside you to work it's will. I may be love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it."
To The Top
Series 4 And Spike Is Back
Listen to me, you stupid bint. This gem is everything. I came back to Sunnydale for it. A place which has witnessed some truely spectacular kickings of my ass. Now, when I have the gem, they all die, don't worry, but until then, stay inside. And, by the way, I would be insanely happy if, from this point on, I heard bugger all about sodding France!
- Spike gets mad at Harmony on his return to Sunnydale during The Harsh Light of Day
Spike: I don't understand. This sort of thing's never happened to me before.
Willow: Maybe you were nervous. You're probably just trying too hard. Doesn't this happen to every vampire?
Spike: Not to me, it doesn't!
- Spike's implant stops him from feasting on Willow during The Initiative
"C'mon! Vampires! Grrr! Let's annhilate them! For justice. And for the safety of...puppies. And Christmas. Right?"
- Spike finds out he can hurt demons, and he has a lot of catching up to do, Doomed
"Talking to Anya about the pre-implant days: You know you take the killing for granted. And then it's gone. And you're like, I wish I'd appreciated it more. Stopped and smelled the corpses."
Xander after deliver a great team talk to the scooby gang:"Who's with me?"
Spike: I am. I know I'm not the first choice for heroics. And Buffy's tried to kill me more than once. And I don't fancy a single one of you at all but...actually all that sounds pretty convincing. (Walks off)
- Where The Wild Things Are
Yeah. Thing about the Slayer is, she's a whiny little thing, but when it comes to fighting she does have a slight tendency to win.
- Spike explains to Adam why he hasn't killed Buffy in The Yoko Factor
To The Top
Series 5 And What Is Spike Doing?
Buffy: Were you born this big a pain in the arse?
Spike: What can I tell you baby, I've always been bad.
London Woman in 1880: "Have you heard, they call him William the Bloody because of his bloody awful poetry"
London man in 1880: "I'd rather have a railway spike through my head than listen to that awful stuff"
Spike: "I'm sorry, did I sully our good name, we're vampires!"
Angelus: All the more reason to use a certain amount of finess
Spike: That stuff's for the frilly cuffs and collars crowd, I'll take a good brawl anyday.
All from Fool for Love
Angel Series 1
Spike's opening commentry of Angels heroics during In The Dark
Spike [Rachel voice]: How can I thank you, you mysterious black-clad hunk of a night-thing?
Spike [Angel voice]: No need, little lady, your tears of grattitude are enough for me. You see I was once a badass vampire, but love and a pesky curse defanged me. No, not the hair! Never the hair!
Spike [Rachel voice]: But there must be some way I can show my appreciation?
Spike [Angel voice]: No, helping those in need's my job and working up a load of sexual tension and prancing away like a magnificent puff is truely thanks enough.
Spike [Rachel voice]: I understand. I have a nephew who is gay, so...
Spike [Angel voice]: Say no more. Evil's still afoot. And I'm almost out of that nancy-boy hair-gel I like so much. Quickly, to the Angel-mobile, away.
(havent read these yet hope their good)
-the buffy bot
The First Evil
... Evil Incarnate ...
Mine? My fave quote/dialogue would be during Becoming where Buffy confesses to Joyce that she is indeed the Slayer and why hasn't she realised this already, the blood on the clothes etc... doesn't she care? But that whole dialogue was just amazing
"If You walk out of that door, don't even think about coming back"
The whole discussion was sooooo dramatic... I like drama 😀
"If You walk out of that door, don't even think about coming back"
The whole discussion was sooooo dramatic... I like drama 😀
Spikeaholic
The Buffy Bot
Spike: A Slayer with family and friends. That sure as hell wasn't in the brochure.
Dru: You'll kill her. And then well have a nice party.
- Drusilla had a lot of confidence in Spike during School Hard
Spike: Are we feeling better then?
Dru: I'm naming all the stars.
Spike: Can't see the stars, love. That's the ceiling. Also, it's day.
Dru: I can see them. But I've named them all the same name, and there's terrible confusion. I fear there may be a duel.
- Anyone doubt she's insane? Dru during Innocence
Drusilla: Ooh what a wonderful mess you've made! (on seeing Spike with the corpse of the Slayer during the Boxer Rebellion)
Spike: You know there are quite a few American beers that are highly underrated. This, unfortunately, is not one of them.
Spike: As I thought: Some nasty thing got a taste of you.
Buffy: Don't get all excited. I'm fine.
Spike: Oh, right. Stuck in a dark corner with a creature you loathe, digging up past uglies, 'cause you're fine.
Buffy: Were you born this big a pain in the ass?
Spike: What can I tell you, baby? I've always been bad.
William: I know I'm a bad poet, but I'm a good man. All I ask is that... is that you try to see me"”
Cecily: I do see you "” that's the problem! You're nothing to me, William. (She stands and looks down at him.) You're beneath me.
Drusilla (speaking her first words ever to William): And I wonder, what possible catastrophe came crashing down from heaven and brought this dashing stranger to tears?
William: Nothing. I wish to be alone.
Drusilla: I see you. You're a man surrounded by fools who cannot see his strength. His vision. His glory. (William gazes at her.) That and burning baby fish swimming all round your head.
Buffy: So you traded up on the food chain. Then what?
Spike: No, please! Don't make it sound like something you'd flip past on the Discovery Channel. Becoming a vampire is a profound and powerful experience. I could feel this new strength coursing through me. Getting killed made me feel alive for the very first time.
Spike: Oh, I'm sorry, did I sully our good name? We're vampires.
Spike: Lesson the first: A Slayer must always reach for her weapon. (He puts his vamp face on.) I've already got mine.
Spike: The way you tell it, one Slayer's snuffs it, another one rises. I figure there's a new Chosen One getting all chosen as we speak.
Spike: Death is on your heels, baby. And sooner or later, it's gonna catch you. And part of you wants it. Not only to stop the fear and uncertainty, but because you're just a little bit in love with it.
Spike: Death is your art. You make it with your hands day after day. That final gasp, that look of peace. And part of you is desperate to know: What's it like? Where does it lead you? And now you see, that's the secret. Not the punch you didn't throw or the kicks you didn't land. She really wanted it. Every Slayer has a death wish. Even you.
Spike: Sooner or later, you're gonna want it. And the second "” the second "” that happens, you know I'll be there. I'll slip in, have myself a real good day.
Spike: Come on. I can feel it, Slayer. You know you wanna dance.
Buffy: Say it's true. Say I do want to. (She pushes him to the ground.) It wouldn't be you, Spike. It would never be you. (She throws the cash at him.) You're beneath me.
Spike: "Beneath me." I'll show her. Six bloody feet beneath me. Hasn't got a death wish? Bitch won't need one.
Harmony: Okay, I'm trying to be supportive here, so don't drive a stake through my heart like last time, but... you can't kill Buffy. She is the Slayer, she is so going to kick your ass.
Spike: I've got two barrels here that'll prove you wrong.
Harmony: How are you gonna kill her? Think! The second you even point that thing at her, you're gonna be all "Aaagh!" (holding her hand to her head in imitation of Spike), and then you'll get bitch-slapped up and down Main Street, unless she's finally had enough and just stakes you!
Spike: Sure, it'll hurt like hell for about two hours. But she'll be dead just a little longer than that.
-the buffy bot
Dru: You'll kill her. And then well have a nice party.
- Drusilla had a lot of confidence in Spike during School Hard
Spike: Are we feeling better then?
Dru: I'm naming all the stars.
Spike: Can't see the stars, love. That's the ceiling. Also, it's day.
Dru: I can see them. But I've named them all the same name, and there's terrible confusion. I fear there may be a duel.
- Anyone doubt she's insane? Dru during Innocence
Drusilla: Ooh what a wonderful mess you've made! (on seeing Spike with the corpse of the Slayer during the Boxer Rebellion)
Spike: You know there are quite a few American beers that are highly underrated. This, unfortunately, is not one of them.
Spike: As I thought: Some nasty thing got a taste of you.
Buffy: Don't get all excited. I'm fine.
Spike: Oh, right. Stuck in a dark corner with a creature you loathe, digging up past uglies, 'cause you're fine.
Buffy: Were you born this big a pain in the ass?
Spike: What can I tell you, baby? I've always been bad.
William: I know I'm a bad poet, but I'm a good man. All I ask is that... is that you try to see me"”
Cecily: I do see you "” that's the problem! You're nothing to me, William. (She stands and looks down at him.) You're beneath me.
Drusilla (speaking her first words ever to William): And I wonder, what possible catastrophe came crashing down from heaven and brought this dashing stranger to tears?
William: Nothing. I wish to be alone.
Drusilla: I see you. You're a man surrounded by fools who cannot see his strength. His vision. His glory. (William gazes at her.) That and burning baby fish swimming all round your head.
Buffy: So you traded up on the food chain. Then what?
Spike: No, please! Don't make it sound like something you'd flip past on the Discovery Channel. Becoming a vampire is a profound and powerful experience. I could feel this new strength coursing through me. Getting killed made me feel alive for the very first time.
Spike: Oh, I'm sorry, did I sully our good name? We're vampires.
Spike: Lesson the first: A Slayer must always reach for her weapon. (He puts his vamp face on.) I've already got mine.
Spike: The way you tell it, one Slayer's snuffs it, another one rises. I figure there's a new Chosen One getting all chosen as we speak.
Spike: Death is on your heels, baby. And sooner or later, it's gonna catch you. And part of you wants it. Not only to stop the fear and uncertainty, but because you're just a little bit in love with it.
Spike: Death is your art. You make it with your hands day after day. That final gasp, that look of peace. And part of you is desperate to know: What's it like? Where does it lead you? And now you see, that's the secret. Not the punch you didn't throw or the kicks you didn't land. She really wanted it. Every Slayer has a death wish. Even you.
Spike: Sooner or later, you're gonna want it. And the second "” the second "” that happens, you know I'll be there. I'll slip in, have myself a real good day.
Spike: Come on. I can feel it, Slayer. You know you wanna dance.
Buffy: Say it's true. Say I do want to. (She pushes him to the ground.) It wouldn't be you, Spike. It would never be you. (She throws the cash at him.) You're beneath me.
Spike: "Beneath me." I'll show her. Six bloody feet beneath me. Hasn't got a death wish? Bitch won't need one.
Harmony: Okay, I'm trying to be supportive here, so don't drive a stake through my heart like last time, but... you can't kill Buffy. She is the Slayer, she is so going to kick your ass.
Spike: I've got two barrels here that'll prove you wrong.
Harmony: How are you gonna kill her? Think! The second you even point that thing at her, you're gonna be all "Aaagh!" (holding her hand to her head in imitation of Spike), and then you'll get bitch-slapped up and down Main Street, unless she's finally had enough and just stakes you!
Spike: Sure, it'll hurt like hell for about two hours. But she'll be dead just a little longer than that.
-the buffy bot
R
rene
Guest
SPIKE~
You listen to me. I've been alive a bit longer than you and dead a lot longer than that. I've seen things you couldn't imagine and done things I'd prefer you didn't. I don't exactly have a reputation for being a thinker. I follow my blood which doesn't exactly rush in the direction of my brain so I make a lot of mistakes. A lot of wrong bloody calls. A hundred plus years and there's only one thing I've ever been sure of. You. Hey, look at me. I'm not asking you for anything. When I say I love you, it's not because I want you, or because I can't have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I've seen your kindness and your strength. I've seen the best and the worst of you and I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are. You are a hell of a woman. You're the one Buffy.
You listen to me. I've been alive a bit longer than you and dead a lot longer than that. I've seen things you couldn't imagine and done things I'd prefer you didn't. I don't exactly have a reputation for being a thinker. I follow my blood which doesn't exactly rush in the direction of my brain so I make a lot of mistakes. A lot of wrong bloody calls. A hundred plus years and there's only one thing I've ever been sure of. You. Hey, look at me. I'm not asking you for anything. When I say I love you, it's not because I want you, or because I can't have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I've seen your kindness and your strength. I've seen the best and the worst of you and I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are. You are a hell of a woman. You're the one Buffy.
Can't Even Shout
Can't Even Cry
Cut to Willow and Xander watching TV in his basement. Spike walks up to stand right in front of the screen and the two of them sway to one side in an effort to see around him.
Spike: "What's this? Sitting around watching the telly while there's evil still a foot. (Turns the TV off) That's not very industrious of you. I say we go out there (Rubs his hands together) and kick a little demon ass! (Xander and Willow stare at him) What, can't go without your Buffy, is that it? To chicken? Let's find her! She is the Chosen One after all. "“ Come on! Vampires! Grrr! Nasty! Let's annihilate them. For justice - and for - the safety of puppies "“ and Christmas, right? Let's *fight* that evil! - Let's *kill* something! (Fade to blak) Oh, come *on*!"
Spike: "What's this? Sitting around watching the telly while there's evil still a foot. (Turns the TV off) That's not very industrious of you. I say we go out there (Rubs his hands together) and kick a little demon ass! (Xander and Willow stare at him) What, can't go without your Buffy, is that it? To chicken? Let's find her! She is the Chosen One after all. "“ Come on! Vampires! Grrr! Nasty! Let's annihilate them. For justice - and for - the safety of puppies "“ and Christmas, right? Let's *fight* that evil! - Let's *kill* something! (Fade to blak) Oh, come *on*!"
A
Alyson
Guest
This isn't actually from an ep but this book I'm reading it's called "weare actors" and it's all about the theater and spike & Willow.
(Willow is walking home from the theater it is dark at night and a vampire lunges at her, she tries to fight him of and then another one comes in, she ducks and the fight each other, one of them aventually win and turns around to face willow)
Willow: Spike?!?!
Spike: (turns back to human) Didn't even bother you a bit, did it then? I should just give it up entirely shouldn't I? Can't even put a decent scare into you. So much for the Big Bad.
Willow: Where you following me? Why?
Spike: We'll sure I was, your a tasty bit aren't you? stands to reason someones going to jump you sooner or Later. Gives me someone to pound on. Since I bloddy well can't eat humans anymore now that this bloody chip in my brain makes my head feel like it's going to explode, If I so much look at one of you sideways.
Willow thought Tasty bait? Spike grinned wickedly He was very good looking, in a punk rock kinda way, and even if - well gay now - she could apreciate a hottie with probely zero body fat - well maybe, how many calories does blood have anyway? I just called spike a hottie? Tara wouldn't like that, I bet Time to change the subject.
(Willow is walking home from the theater it is dark at night and a vampire lunges at her, she tries to fight him of and then another one comes in, she ducks and the fight each other, one of them aventually win and turns around to face willow)
Willow: Spike?!?!
Spike: (turns back to human) Didn't even bother you a bit, did it then? I should just give it up entirely shouldn't I? Can't even put a decent scare into you. So much for the Big Bad.
Willow: Where you following me? Why?
Spike: We'll sure I was, your a tasty bit aren't you? stands to reason someones going to jump you sooner or Later. Gives me someone to pound on. Since I bloddy well can't eat humans anymore now that this bloody chip in my brain makes my head feel like it's going to explode, If I so much look at one of you sideways.
Willow thought Tasty bait? Spike grinned wickedly He was very good looking, in a punk rock kinda way, and even if - well gay now - she could apreciate a hottie with probely zero body fat - well maybe, how many calories does blood have anyway? I just called spike a hottie? Tara wouldn't like that, I bet Time to change the subject.
StopTheBunnies
Townie
High voice: How can I thank you, you mysterious black-clad hunk of a night thing?
Low voice: No need lil lady, your tears of gratitude are enough for me. You see, I used to be a Bad-Ass vampire, but love, and a pesky curse defanged me. And now I'm just a big fluffy puppy with bad teeth. No! Not the hair, never the hair!
High voice: But there must be some way I can show my appreciation...
Low voice: No! Helpin' those in need's my job, and workin' up a load of sexual tension and prancing away like a magnificent poof is truly thanks enough.
High voice: I understand, I have a nephew who's gay, so....
Low voice: Say no more! Evil's still afoot, and I'm almost out of that Nancy Boy hair gel I like so much. Quickly, to the Angelmobile, away!
You're not friends. You'll never be friends. You'll be in love 'til it kills you both. You'll fight, and you'll shag, and you'll hate each other 'til it makes you quiver, but you'll never be friends. Love isn't brains, children. It's blood. Blood screaming inside you to work it's will. I may be love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it.
You listen to me. I've been alive a bit longer than you and dead a lot longer than that. I've seen things you couldn't imagine and done things I'd prefer you didn't. I don't exactly have a reputation for being a thinker. I follow my blood which doesn't exactly rush in the direction of my brain so I make a lot of mistakes. A lot of wrong bloody calls. A hundread plus years and there's only one thing I've ever been sure of. You. Hey, look at me. I'm not asking you for anything. When I say I love you, it's not because I want you, or because I can't have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I've seen your kindness and your strength. I've seen the best and the worst of you and I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are. You are a hell of a woman. You're the one Buffy.
What's this?Sitting around watching the telly when ther's evil afoot? It's not very industrious of you. I say, we go out there and kick a little demon ass. What, can't go without your slayer? Too chicken? Let's find her. She is the Chosen One, after all. Come on! Vampires! Grr! Nasty. Let's annihilate them.
It's paradise, big windows, lovely garden. It'll be perfect when we want the sunlight to kill us
It's a big rock. Can't wait to tell my friends. They don't have a rock this big.
Ain't that a fantastic day. Birds singin', squirrels making lots of rotten little squirrels, sun beamin' down in a nice non-fatal way. It's very exciting. Can't wait to see if I freckle.
Death is your art. You make it with your hands, day after day. That final gasp, that look of peace... Part of you is desperate to know... What's it like? Where does it lead you? Now you see, that's the secret. Not the punch she didn't throw or the kick she didn't land. She merely wanted it. Everybody has a death wish. Even you.
It's always got to be blood. Blood is life. Why do you think we eat it (vampires)? It's what keeps you going, makes you warm, makes you hard, and makes you other than dead. It's always got to be blood.
This is the crack team that foils my every plan? I am deeply shamed.
Yeah, o.k. Sorry. But I just had no idea that gods were such prancing lightweights. Mark my words: the Slayer is going to kick your skanky, lopsided ass back to whatever place would take a cheap, whorish, fashion-victim, ex-god like you. Glory power-kicks him across the room, through the wall... and out of his chains.. he spits up blood] Good plan, Spike.
I don't like to brag. Oh, who am I kidding; I love to brag.
Low voice: No need lil lady, your tears of gratitude are enough for me. You see, I used to be a Bad-Ass vampire, but love, and a pesky curse defanged me. And now I'm just a big fluffy puppy with bad teeth. No! Not the hair, never the hair!
High voice: But there must be some way I can show my appreciation...
Low voice: No! Helpin' those in need's my job, and workin' up a load of sexual tension and prancing away like a magnificent poof is truly thanks enough.
High voice: I understand, I have a nephew who's gay, so....
Low voice: Say no more! Evil's still afoot, and I'm almost out of that Nancy Boy hair gel I like so much. Quickly, to the Angelmobile, away!
You're not friends. You'll never be friends. You'll be in love 'til it kills you both. You'll fight, and you'll shag, and you'll hate each other 'til it makes you quiver, but you'll never be friends. Love isn't brains, children. It's blood. Blood screaming inside you to work it's will. I may be love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it.
You listen to me. I've been alive a bit longer than you and dead a lot longer than that. I've seen things you couldn't imagine and done things I'd prefer you didn't. I don't exactly have a reputation for being a thinker. I follow my blood which doesn't exactly rush in the direction of my brain so I make a lot of mistakes. A lot of wrong bloody calls. A hundread plus years and there's only one thing I've ever been sure of. You. Hey, look at me. I'm not asking you for anything. When I say I love you, it's not because I want you, or because I can't have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I've seen your kindness and your strength. I've seen the best and the worst of you and I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are. You are a hell of a woman. You're the one Buffy.
What's this?Sitting around watching the telly when ther's evil afoot? It's not very industrious of you. I say, we go out there and kick a little demon ass. What, can't go without your slayer? Too chicken? Let's find her. She is the Chosen One, after all. Come on! Vampires! Grr! Nasty. Let's annihilate them.
It's paradise, big windows, lovely garden. It'll be perfect when we want the sunlight to kill us
It's a big rock. Can't wait to tell my friends. They don't have a rock this big.
Ain't that a fantastic day. Birds singin', squirrels making lots of rotten little squirrels, sun beamin' down in a nice non-fatal way. It's very exciting. Can't wait to see if I freckle.
Death is your art. You make it with your hands, day after day. That final gasp, that look of peace... Part of you is desperate to know... What's it like? Where does it lead you? Now you see, that's the secret. Not the punch she didn't throw or the kick she didn't land. She merely wanted it. Everybody has a death wish. Even you.
It's always got to be blood. Blood is life. Why do you think we eat it (vampires)? It's what keeps you going, makes you warm, makes you hard, and makes you other than dead. It's always got to be blood.
This is the crack team that foils my every plan? I am deeply shamed.
Yeah, o.k. Sorry. But I just had no idea that gods were such prancing lightweights. Mark my words: the Slayer is going to kick your skanky, lopsided ass back to whatever place would take a cheap, whorish, fashion-victim, ex-god like you. Glory power-kicks him across the room, through the wall... and out of his chains.. he spits up blood] Good plan, Spike.
I don't like to brag. Oh, who am I kidding; I love to brag.