Forgiveness. General discussion.
- Thread starter Ripper666
- Start date
kittenpoker
Raising penguins in Guam
hmmm.....I'm not sure. I mean certainly forgiveness lies with the forgiver - meaning it is up to the person doing the forgiving - it cannot be pulled or forced it has to come from within them.
I do agree it is an act of compassion....
I want to give this more thought.
Good topic though!
I do agree it is an act of compassion....
I want to give this more thought.
Good topic though!
The statement is very true. Forgiveness itself has no substance it is a feeling bestowed upon you by others. Can you act in a way to change others' perception of you and find it in themselves to forgive? Absolutely. Until that perception is changed, forgiveness is not possible.
S
sisterofmercy
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sisterofmercy
Ray of Sunshine..
You can't really move on and try and be better unless someone has given you that chance to do so through forgiving them. So yeah it is an act of compassion. We've all wanted to be forgiven for things in the past, makes sense for us to try and extend the same courtesy to those who have wronged us.
sisterofmercy said:
But then all Angel was fightinng for was for nothing. I think you can move on even if the person doesn't forgive you! Of course it is more easier if the person forgave you. But you can always try to move on and that's what counts!
sisterofmercy
Ray of Sunshine..
Angel wasn't just fighting for his victims though. He was fighting for himself as much as anything and was his own worst enemy.
Forgiveness doesn't mean that it's all over as you need actions to prove that the incident won't happen again and that they're truly remorseful. It just means that the victim is giving the aggressor that space to make an effort.
brinkster130
Riley's BFF
I do believe that forgiveness is a very compassionate act. People can certainly do things to prove they regret past mistakes and to show that they are actively tring to be the best they can be; but there really isn't any sure way to earn forgiveness form another person. Sometimes people simply can't move past certain events and/or don't have the ability to forgive someone for their wrong doings. I do believe that forgiveness is good for both parties involved, holding onto anger and resentment can be very unhealthy and by forgiving someone you are in a way setting yourself free from that negativity.
Cast No Shadow
You are my world.
white avenger
white avenger
Originally Posted by Rupert Giles
Forgiveness is an act of compassion. You can not earn it itself. It will be given to the ones who need it.
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I think that forgiveness CAN be earned, or at least an offender can make themselves worthy of forgiveness, but whether or not they receive it is entirely up to the offended party or some representative of that party or parties. Exactly what would determine who that representative would be in Angel or Spike's case, I have no idea. Certainly not Buffy, because that would be both too easy and too obvious. But that's a specific and not a generality.
In general, if it's expected for the offending party to try and make amends for his offense, shouldn't it be expected also for the offended party to give that forgiveness, once reasonable amends have been made? And, if that is so, wouldn't withholding that forgiveness, once earned, be just as wrong as the original offense?
In other words, who would win the fight between astronauts and cave men?
Forgiveness is an act of compassion. You can not earn it itself. It will be given to the ones who need it.
*************************************************
I think that forgiveness CAN be earned, or at least an offender can make themselves worthy of forgiveness, but whether or not they receive it is entirely up to the offended party or some representative of that party or parties. Exactly what would determine who that representative would be in Angel or Spike's case, I have no idea. Certainly not Buffy, because that would be both too easy and too obvious. But that's a specific and not a generality.
In general, if it's expected for the offending party to try and make amends for his offense, shouldn't it be expected also for the offended party to give that forgiveness, once reasonable amends have been made? And, if that is so, wouldn't withholding that forgiveness, once earned, be just as wrong as the original offense?
In other words, who would win the fight between astronauts and cave men?
SlayerFest
Wiley Dairy Gnome
This about sums it up...
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13mUFEXnB54"]Forgiveness[/ame]
In all seriousness, I agree that it is an act of compassion but it shouldn't be given to someone solely because they need it. The person who needs it, should truly be sorry and the person who is forgiving them should actually forgive whoever it is they're forgiving. I mean, you can kind of earn it. If someone does something mean to me and they make it up to me somehow it might make it easier for me to forgive them.
It really depends on what it is though. If someone murdered my non existent kitten, they wouldn't be able to make it up to me with a piece of chocolate cake haha. Yeah, forgiveness is complicated. For the most part, a simple "sorry for...." will suffice.
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13mUFEXnB54"]Forgiveness[/ame]
In all seriousness, I agree that it is an act of compassion but it shouldn't be given to someone solely because they need it. The person who needs it, should truly be sorry and the person who is forgiving them should actually forgive whoever it is they're forgiving. I mean, you can kind of earn it. If someone does something mean to me and they make it up to me somehow it might make it easier for me to forgive them.
It really depends on what it is though. If someone murdered my non existent kitten, they wouldn't be able to make it up to me with a piece of chocolate cake haha. Yeah, forgiveness is complicated. For the most part, a simple "sorry for...." will suffice.
E
EvilWillow
LMAO. Oh you. ;)
wickedtiger86
Scooby
Giles: To forgive is an act of compassion, Buffy. It's, it's not done because people deserve it. It's done because they need it.
Forgiveness is completely an act of compassion. I think that people can try to earn forgiveness, but the act of forgiving must come from inside the person doing the forgiving. I try very hard to understand where people are coming from when they do things, which makes forgiving easier. I don't remember ever forgiving someone because they spent time trying to earn it.
Here's something though. I have forgiven a person for something that they had done. However, they are so ashamed of themselves, they can't forgive themselves, and therefore don't accept the fact that I have forgiven them. They don't think they deserve it.
So, obviously this is a person that needs forgiveness but regardless won't take it. So where do you go from there?
Forgiveness is completely an act of compassion. I think that people can try to earn forgiveness, but the act of forgiving must come from inside the person doing the forgiving. I try very hard to understand where people are coming from when they do things, which makes forgiving easier. I don't remember ever forgiving someone because they spent time trying to earn it.
Here's something though. I have forgiven a person for something that they had done. However, they are so ashamed of themselves, they can't forgive themselves, and therefore don't accept the fact that I have forgiven them. They don't think they deserve it.
So, obviously this is a person that needs forgiveness but regardless won't take it. So where do you go from there?
wickedtiger86 said:
I think in such a case you have to wake them up and help them forgiving themself. Something like:
Hey buddy what you have done was shit, if you realize this and promise never doing it again it's ok for me. And now move your ass one and become the old-guy again okay?
Of courese it will need its time but I think that you can help those people and I prefer them because they really regrett!