Funnies

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HowiMetdaSlayer said:
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I just discovered the website for the company


after your initial post, they are probably getting sued
Wood Milk’s milkers have barked up the wrong tree. The campaign is now being called out for possibly breaking the law, especially since it’s funded by the US Department of Agriculture (USDA). In an official complaint made to the USDA Office of Inspector General, the Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine (PCRM) accuses the federal-supported MilkPEP of creating a “viral advertising campaign disparaging plant-based milks.” Such efforts are against US laws that ban federal agricultural marketing from depicting other agricultural products “in a negative light,” the nonprofit adds. In short, the criticism is that MilkPEP—a promotions arm for the dairy industry that’s backed by the USDA’s checkoff program—cannot disparage other milks for the sake of promoting dairy.
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So technology instead of magic was used to put a soul into machines. Works as well as I expected:

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I wonder how appealing love spells (like in the Buffyverse) would be if they worked out like this...bet plenty would still use them if they could:

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It's the little things that exasperate God with us...

God asks St. Francis, patron of nature and flowers, "What happened to all the beautiful flowers that he worked so hard on to be self-sustaining?"

"It's a tribe that settled there called the Suburbanites. They exterminated your flowers as weeds to replace them with grass."

"Grass? But that doesn't attract butterflies and bees, only worms. It doesn't endure well. It's boring."

"Nevertheless, they work hard to keep it that way. They fertilize the grass every spring while poisoning any other plants on their lawns."

"At least it grows fast in spring, that should make the Suburbanites happy."

St. Francis winces. "Apparently not, Lord. They cut it regularly, sometimes twice a week."

"And bale it like hay?"

"Most of them rake it up and put it in bags for disposal."

"They sell it?"

"No, Lord. They pay others to take it away."

God sighs. "I want to be sure I understood you correctly. You're saying they fertilize grass so that it will grow, but when it does grow, they cut it and pay others to take it away?"

"Yes, Lord."

God throws up his hands. "Well at least they must be relieved when summer comes along so that the lack of rain slows the growth."

"Actually, Lord, they pay money to water it so that they can continue to cut it and have it carted away."

God strains to look down on this madness he hears described. "At least they kept some of the trees. Those grow leaves in the spring and provide shade in the summer. Then they fall to the ground in the fall to form a natural blanket, one of my more brilliant ideas if I say so myself."

"Actually, Lord, the Suburbanites rake up the leaves, and then pay to have them taken away as well."

"How to the protect the shrub and tree roots in the winter, and moisture in the soil?"

"After paying to have the leaves thrown away, then then go out and pay for mulch, which they then spread around in place of the leaves."

"Mulch? I don't remember creating that."

"They make it from trees cut down and then grind up."

There is a long silence (which lasts a long time in Heaven) as God just blinks at him, and then looks down on the world again in disbelief. Finally, He waves it off. "ENOUGH! I don't want to think about it anymore. St. Catherine, you're in charge of the Arts. What are you going to show us tonight?"

"A movie called Dumb and Dumber, Lord. It's a story about..."

"Never mind, I think I just heard the entire plot from St. Francis."
 
Seen on another site during a quite heated discussion........

'Seriously, a Rainbow T-shirt from Target won't turn your Daughter Gay.........You need someone like Eliza Dushku as Faith in Buffy the Vampire Slayer, for that!'


Sounds like she spoke from experience?
 
Today while watching (and being interrupted adrupted™) react videos with the GF...

Moi - whomever decided to put ads in the middle of videos should be stabbed, shot, run over with a steamroller & their remains put into a tiny matchbox and delivered to their family for an improper burial
Trish - wow tell us how you really feel!

😀
 
One of the wild birds outside has learned to mimic an oven timer 🤣
 
Moptop
Moptop
I had a cockatiel that learned to mimic the beeping the microwave made when you pushed the buttons.
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