Gay Straight and everything in between

Nowadays I suppose that I would "Classify" myself as bi-curious. I agree that women are much more attractive than men, I generally get along better with girls (although I usually like my guy friends more), and I'm just more comfortable with the ladies in general. 🙂 Still, I guess that I lean more towards guys than girls.

Really, I agree with whoever said that gay guys are the ones for them. Same here! I LOVE gay guys! They are like my favorite ever. Pure awesomeness. It's too bad that they're not into girls, because I'd love to date one of 'em...

But anyway, it's kind of hard for me to tell... I mean, I don't get crushes. I've had two crushes in my entire life, and one of them is still kind of going on (I was practically in love with the guy for like a year, but since I never see him anymore I'm pretty much over it. 🙂 ) and the other is over, but not way over, you know? And they were both on guys, but... Two is just not much to go on. 😀 As I said, I just don't get crushes, and I'm rarely romantically attracted to people. To be honest, I'm more affectionate and playfully flirtatious with my friends than anybody else. :biggrin3: And I've always assumed that in the future I'll be bisexual.

And as Vicky said, classifying oneself at such a young age (actually, I don't believe in classifying people at all.) is pretty pointless. I don't really care about orientation, as the phrase goes, "Live and let live."

(Sometimes I think that monogamy would be the better option though... 😀 )
 
^ I still can't classify myself, and I'm a good few years older. I always thought you were supposed to figure these things out as a teenager. Well, I've left my teenage years behind, and I'm still clueless.

Remember that post I made about the many changes of heart I've had but now I was pretty sure I was straight?
Well yeah, forget all that, I'm as confused as ever. Honestly, at this point, I doubt I'll ever figure it out.
 
^ I guess you just have to accept that your sexual preferences will keep on changing? That doesn't have to be a big problem you know. Like, even if I see myself as as lesbian, and will probably mainly have relationships with women throughout my life. I know my preferences, when it comes to other things than gender, have changed a lot. And the people (girls) I have dated have been very different from one another.
 
BuffyBro said:
I am actually gay in a small Pa.
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I'm queer in small NY, we're like neighbors.

---------- Post added at 02:50 AM ---------- Previous post was at 02:39 AM ----------

As far as the discussion, I find labels quite helpful personally. Be a gay man has some very serious disadvantages, but there are some positives to it too.
 
Tueuse de Vampires
Tueuse de Vampires
I also think labels are helpful...unfortunately, I just don't seem to be labelable
I think the problem with classification is that putting yourself in one box excludes you from the other boxes. I don't think sexuality is anywhere near as black & white as people would like to make it out to be. For me, I see myself as straight not because I couldn't see myself having sex with another man (I could, though I haven't) but because I can't see myself being in love with another man. I think our gender preferences when it comes to sex and when it comes to romance are not necessarily the same thing, but both contribute to drawing a picture of who we are.

I noted a few people in this thread saying that ideally the state wouldn't recognise marriage at all - the thing is, though, that there are all kinds of routine secular matters (insurance policies, inheritances, adoption, drug plans, hundreds of others) where 'family' is a significant distinction. There needs to be a way for the government to ascertain who you consider family and who you don't. For example, in lieu of a will, a person's property will revert to the state if they have no next-of-kin. In such a case, if a person's lifelong commitment to another individual is not recognised by the state due to antiquated notions of gender in marriage, then I think the state has committed highway robbery.

What drives me crazy about the way religion thrusts its head into a secular discussion about state-sanctioned marriage is the hypocrisy behind it. I have no religion, and my wife is Muslim. By the laws of Islam, our marriage is illegitimate. Yet no one on any country would seriously question our ability to have a state-sanctioned marriage, because our genders happen to match the antiquated definition. Only when it suits their purposes to people start claiming marriage to be a religious thing.
 
I've lurked on this thread far too long now.

In my short lifetime, I've been with a few guys and one girl (not to mention the others I've fallen for). I believe I've had an attraction to females since about the second grade. I didn't realize I liked guys until a lot further down the line. I know it sounds crazy. In seventh grade, I wrote a paper opposing same-sex marriage to cover it up because I was viciously teased. I'm so ashamed now.

I fall for people because of who they are, but if I had a choice, I would probably end up going for a girl first. I don't like to have any sort of label stuck on me. I still have quite awhile to figure out who I'm going to spend my life with. I'll let you all know what happens then.
 
I'm gay, but still masculine so I don't fit in anywhere.

My family knows, and 3 of my friends (2 of which I don't talk to anymore). I don't have any gay characteristics that people usually associate with gay people. I can't name a Judy Garland song except the obvious one. I don't go around calling myself "guuuuurrrllllll" or talking like I'm a girl, dressing feminine, etc. I know nothing about fashion and lack all cooking skills that doesn't have to do with tacos. Obviously I'm well aware that not every homosexual male has those qualities, but that's mostly what I've come across as of yet. That's why I'm single. I went to a gay club once and it was just a bunch of skinny feminine boys acting slutty on the dance floor. It just really wasn't my scene at all. So I'm stuck with the problem of - well how am i supposed to meet somene if no one knows unless i introduce myself "oh hi im so and so and im gay."

things like the big gay marriage debate don't really bother me. mostly because (i'm only 22) i don't have any plans of getting married, or at least that's my mindset right now. i do understand how it effects other LGBT people who do want to get married. i think that everyone should have equal rights as long as you are a legal citizen of this country. i hate the whole "well if we let two men or two women get married, then people want to start marrying trees or toasters!" debate. um, no, sorry toasters arent living, breathing organisms with feelings. however, i don't picture myself ever marching in a gay parade for equality or stuff like that. i always said that being gay is only like 1% of who i am as a person. if i defined myself by that then i'd have to start joining the blonde hair club or the tan people club, because those are two small parts of my life as well.
 
I guess I "should" say that I'm bi but it's really more complicated than that actually. I've been thinking I was straight until I was like 13 when I began to be attracted sexually only to guys too. Then, at 16, I fell in love with a guy and thought I was bi. Then, for a few months, maybe a year, I was only attracted to guys so I came to the conclusion that I was gay...until I fell for a girl last year and began being more attracted to more girls. Finally, today most girls don't do anything to me and I'm attracted to most guys... so yeah.. that's about it.
 
Well if all the other lurkers are going to post, I guess I'll make like the cool kids 😉

I don't think it's any secret around here (I believe I've posted in this sort of thread a few times before) but I'm currently dating a wonderful gal and consider myself to be happily gay. 🙂 Up until I was about 14 and a half, relationships with another girl is something that I had never seriously considered. I used to get a lot of "friend-crushes" on my gal pals, but obviously the thought never occurred to me that those feelings were from wanting anything more than to be friends. I was busy being a silly teeny-bopper and getting "the biggest crush" on the new exchange students to think about girls :silly:. Then just after I turned 15 I started to become attracted to a very good friend of mine named Tara (no joke, that's really her name 😉) and not long after that realized that I was without a doubt, head over heels. It took two years of woo-ing after that and dealing with a lot of baggage from her last relationship (we even tried dating once during that time, and broke up after like 3 weeks)-- but eventually on Valentine's Day when I was 17 she asked me to be her steady girlfriend. And three and a half years later we're still going strong.

Everyone in my (small!) family knows that we're an item, as do most of our friends. Only one person in her family knows about us so far, but she also comes from a much bigger and much more conservative bunch than I do. And until she's ready I'm happily waiting and enjoying being her girlfriend (in the words of Topher Brink: "Her job's way harder!"). Even if something happened and things didn't work out with Tar, I can't see myself ever being in a serious relationship with a man. I can certainly admire a nice piece of eye-candy when I see one, but I just don't have any interest in being with a guy romantically.

Anyway, that's my story. I really didn't mean for it to come out that long, sorry guys! :blush:
 
Angelic Slayer said:
Then just after I turned 15 I started to become attracted to a very good friend of mine named Tara (no joke, that's really her name 😉) and not long
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I love that her name is Tara! Do you consider yourself to be her Willow? 🙂
 
Angelic Slayer
Angelic Slayer
Aww well she certainly does have me under her spell! ;)... lol if she were a BtVS fan I'd totally use the reference, but sadly she's still a non-believer!
Clearly you aren't in the closet since you just posted to the Internet that you're gay.

One of my best friends, who is also one of the hottest girls I've seen in my entire life, is bisexual.
 
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