Help Me Become American

  • Thread starter Thread starter WillowFromBuffy
  • Start date Start date
WillowFromBuffy said:
At least Americans know which side of the road to drive on.
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NJ invented the jughandle, you might hold off on saying that until you try that on for size. I was like what the!?!
 
white avenger said:
But it tastes FANTASTIC.
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If shit tastes fantastic to you then yes, it tastes fantastic. It does SMELL great, but in the mouth, not so much. No. Pass.
 
Taake said:
But fun! So great that you're gonna go and get to stay for a period (i.e. not just a holiday). What are you going to be doing? 🙂
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I am taking some literature courses. I am too much of a coward to do something cool, like backpacking or taking a job somewhere. I am comfortable at universities.
 
Taake
Taake
That sounds like heaven to me!
Mr. Pole said:
Yeah, because NJ aint famous for their bro culture or anything.
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I will agree that NJ is probably not on my list of favorite states (depending on what area of NJ). I've only been to Newark but many areas are nice I believe.
 
If you go inland in NJ to the Princeton area, it is quite nice. Coastal areas are a bit rough but there are always interesting things going on.
 
New Jersey? Did you lose a bet or something? 😛

Make sure to pronounce it like this: Nu Joy-zee. You'll fit right in.

Whatever you do, DON'T borrow money from the Mafia.

Wear lots of heavy eye makeup, always have chewing gum in your mouth, and talk loud.

Bon chance!
 
On the driving part, it depends on the region. In Denver for instance people drive politely, but in places like the East coast you are expected to sort of fight for your space and be assertive. They won't just let you in while merging onto the highways. In such circumstances you are expected to kind of force your way in.

Are you male or interested in intimate relations with women? American women I find to be more defensive than foreign women. (What do you other Americans think?) But here is the common misunderstanding: the defensiveness isn't meant to be rude. It's just that women get approached a lot in ways they don't like. You have to win trust with an American woman first. Especially the attractive ones.
 
AnthonyCordova said:
They won't just let you in while merging onto the highways. In such circumstances you are expected to kind of force your way in.
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And then ride your ass the whole time. If you pull in front of someone prepare for them to be an inch away from your bumper with their hi-beams on... or maybe that's just my experience.
 
Mr. Pole said:
And then ride your ass the whole time. If you pull in front of someone prepare for them to be an inch away from your bumper with their hi-beams on... or maybe that's just my experience.
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I guess so. But the key for a foreigner I would think is that in such places they must drive assertively. This might push to rude, but I honestly don't think they would see it that way (Colorado people complain of it too).

And just in general, being assertive on the east coast is more in keeping with the lifestyle. People out there consider their time precious and don't wait for people slow to action. Chicago too. Be cognizant of the pace of life around you.
 
caitaintdead said:
Every time I see this title pop up I think someone is asking for a sneaky marriage for citizenship deal.
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Great... now I am thinking of that horrible Gerard Depardieu movie... must get that one out of my head and think of the Ryan Reynolds movie instead.
 
AnthonyCordova said:
Chicago too.
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I don't think the Chicago driving is that bad at all. It seems really normal to me. People's general attitudes there are worse than their driving.
 
caitaintdead
caitaintdead
I have found that a pretty good rule in life has always been to think of Ryan Reynolds.
Mr. Pole said:
 

I don't think the Chicago driving is that bad at all. It seems really normal to me. People's general attitudes there are worse than their driving.
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Interesting. A common thing I encounter in Chicago is, when you are a pedestrian with a walk sign, the car preparing to turn right will stop abruptly RIGHT where the area begins, on your ass so to speak, and then accelerate through it just as soon as you walk through their lane and not a millisecond after that, so it makes you feel like they are being pushy and impatient. Again, I don't think people from Chicago think they are being rude when they do this; it's the pace of lifestyle. Also, when you have shitty traffic, they don't want to spend any extra time in it then they have to.

Every time I go back home to Chicago I note how much more brusque people are there than here (Denver). It requires adjusting.
 
I have to be assertive? Damn. I'm horrible at that, except for being a loudmouth, I guess.

Anyway, I don't plan on driving. I usually avoid driving and have never owned a car (except for a large van me and my friends drove to parties in High School. Don't ask. Local custom ... involving red overall uniforms and funny hats. I almost fell off the roof several times, because the kid we got to drive it kept choking the engine)

And I am from Norway. We are the most defensive and introvrted species on the planet. I won't be trying my luck with random women I meet on the streets 😛
 
I just thought of something uber important that I cannot believe I didn't tell you!

The NY Times is not fake news, no matter what people say!!!!!
 
Fool for Buffy said:
I just thought of something uber important that I cannot believe I didn't tell you!

The NY Times is not fake news, no matter what people say!!!!!
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I lack the cultural knowledge to understand this joke. You need to educate me, not confuse me 😛 Is the NY Times considered to be part of "the liberal media"?
 
Priceless
Priceless
You're referencing literature I have no way to be familiar with . . . lol
WillowFromBuffy said:
I lack the cultural knowledge to understand this joke. You need to educate me, not confuse me 😛 Is the NY Times considered to be part of "the liberal media"?
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Sorry for the confusion. It actually wasn't a joke. Basically Trump calls out sources of the media and calls them fake news because of certain times when they may be either distorting something he said or taking an offensive stance on something he says. It's become a crazy phenomenon that has led to people having no idea what is considered fake news and Trump is so far down the rabbit hole with lies that anything he says turns into a story, continuing this cycle.
 
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