Question Homeschooling?

[HalloweenRain]

My family moved to a city in New Mexico, The school system here has the lowest test scores in the state. Property taxes are low and thus the money put towards education is pretty sub-standard. Recently there was a case of a janitor being accused of molesting fourteen children over the course of his seven years in the district. The entire community was outraged...but not at him. The newspaper called for his name to be cleared and even said that the children who "maliciously slandered" his good name should be ashamed. I refuse to send my children to school here, and the next closest district is over an hour away. I will not send the most precious people in my life to a school where they wont be heard or believed.
My daughter is four. This autumn would have been her first time in school. In light of the developments, she will receive her first two years of education from me. I may not have been trained as a teacher, but I did work as a teacher's aid for two years. I've witnessed some very good and some very bad teachers who were "qualified". I don't believe you can just say teachers who go through training, are always better equipped than parents to deal with their children.
My daughter knows the alphabet, she has about sixty sight words down, all of the colors she should know, can count to 100 with no help, and can do some simple math such as adding and subtracting single digits. I don't have very much experience with what a four year old should be able to do as she is my first, and I don't have much contact with my sisters(who have older children). I would say I've taught her pretty well so far.
I would appreciate people being less skeptical about the abilities of others. I think it's hurtful to those of us who do home-school but are refraining from posting. Obviously not all teachers who have gotten degrees in education are good, so why on earth would you make the assumption that homeschooling is bad? How can you possibly gauge the potential of people you don't know?

 

[Zeppo]

Every homeschooled student I have come to know are the most independent, confident and social people I've met. I think there is misconceptions about it; such as being cooped up at home all the time. That's what puts people off of it, the idea of not being socialized. Yet there are meetings with parents and other homeschooled children regulararly to do just that. The kids take part in community activities whether it be hockey, baseball, soccer, theatre, skating, painting, karate, scouts, etc. and become friends with people by participating in a mutual passion, rather than forcing friendships by being placed in one environment for 12 years just to get by (I'm sure we all relate to that). I find high school cliques/stereotyping/reputations follow people around forever and hinder us later in life more than we realize, something I don't think homeschooled children have the burden of. Of course, there's exceptions as always but this has been my experience. I grew up in a town where you know lots of people - though not everyone - and yet everybody knew the homeschooled kids (for well reasons). I definately would homeschool my kids for the experience and the reasons I listed in my first sentence.

 

[Faith]

No, I mean bullying. I don't know about anyone else, but I was bullied repeatedly by students AND teachers.

Bullying is not something that is just exclusive to schools though, it is something that can happen at any time in your life. In school, work, social clubs etc.

 

[Flannen]

No, I mean bullying. I don't know about anyone else, but I was bullied repeatedly by students AND teachers.

So was I. I wouldn't let that stop from letting my children go to school and obviously, I went into the profession myself. Now I abhor bullying and the single hardest thing about my job is when I see it happening, it is truly heartbreaking. But I wouldn't want to shy away from it, I instead get an opportunity to help people through it, to help bullies through their anger and to try and make a difference when it comes to bullying. I'm frequently told it's a losing battle, but it's important for me to be there and doing any little thing that I can.

My daughter is four. This autumn would have been her first time in school. In light of the developments, she will receive her first two years of education from me. I may not have been trained as a teacher, but I did work as a teacher's aid for two years. I've witnessed some very good and some very bad teachers who were "qualified". I don't believe you can just say teachers who go through training, are always better equipped than parents to deal with their children.

I completely your understand where you're coming from and I agree that just because someone goes through a certain set of training sessions it doesn't mean they are better equipped. But I don't think anyone has said that teachers "deal" with children better their own parents, I think we're very much focused on the actual learning. But the roles are different. It's not a teachers' job to parent a child, parents and teachers deal with children in very different ways and both are essential.

I would appreciate people being less skeptical about the abilities of others. I think it's hurtful to those of us who do home-school but are refraining from posting. Obviously not all teachers who have gotten degrees in education are good, so why on earth would you make the assumption that homeschooling is bad? How can you possibly gauge the potential of people you don't know?

I don't think it's a case of being skeptical. Again, I don't feel anyone has suggested a parent can't teach their child. However, when I think about what I need to know to get kids through formal qualifications, it's ridiculous. I need to know exam specifications and marking criteria like the back of my hand; I'm trained to mark and moderate coursework so that I can tell the difference between an A grade piece of work and an A*. I need to know how to tell each individual child what they need to do to their work to get it from a C to a B. And I only teach one subject. Personally, I would trust those who are a specialist in their subject to do that better than I can in any subject that's not English. It must be a mammoth, and commendable, task for those who teach their children at home through their whole school life.

 

[HalloweenRain]

Bullying is not something that is just exclusive to schools though, it is something that can happen at any time in your life. In school, work, social clubs etc.

I think bullying has much more of an impact during the adolescent years. You are trying so hard to fit in and are desperate to find acceptance. If you attend public/private school the depression is exacerbated by the fact that you see these kids almost every day. A social club is something you can just quit. The jobs you find as a teen can be dropped easily as well, because most of the time they are menial.

 

[Faith]

I think bullying has much more of an impact during the adolescent years. You are trying so hard to fit in and are desperate to find acceptance. If you attend public/private school the depression is exacerbated by the fact that you see these kids almost every day. A social club is something you can just quit. The jobs you find as a teen can be dropped easily as well, because most of the time they are menial.

I get what you are saying and agree to an extent, but the point I am making is that bullying takes place in adults lives too and I know plenty of adults who still find it so hard to fit in and be accepted. That isn't something that goes away with age.

When I was referring to jobs I was referring to jobs you have full time when you are done with school, 9-5, the kind you can't just walk out of if they are your sole source of income.

We are starting to get away from the main point of the thread, I was just curious as to what Evil Willow was referring to when she meant bad environment.

 

[EvilWillow]

Bullying is not something that is just exclusive to schools though, it is something that can happen at any time in your life. In school, work, social clubs etc.

Yes, but it is way more common in schools, and rarely anything is done about it. It's taken children committing suicide for them to even start to take notice of it, which is truly sad and pathetic.

The reality is, most schools do nothing to protect your children from violence.

 

[Buffy Summers]

When I was referring to jobs I was referring to jobs you have full time when you are done with school, 9-5, the kind you can't just walk out of if they are your sole source of income.

And quitting isn't the solution to bullying, whether it's a club, school, job or anything.

 

[Flannen]

EvilWillow agrees: It's great that you care about bullying and your students. But I think you are in the minority.

I work with teachers everyday and know a lot of others who I don't have the privilege of working alongside and I can assure, I am not in the minority.

Yes, but it is way more common in schools, and rarely anything is done about it. It's taken children committing suicide for them to even start to take notice of it, which is truly sad and pathetic.

The reality is, most schools do nothing to protect your children from violence.

It's easy to say nothing is done about it but as someone who is mentor as well as a teacher, I can safely say there is an awful lot done about it. A lot of schools in my area have school police officers, who are on duty officers working in the school for the whole day, every day who actively identify and deal with those bullying. I've, and many others, have set up and attended restorative justice sessions in order to address the issues between young people and help them figure out how to address it. If a permanent police officer on sight, not to mention regular PSHE sessions about knife crime, drug abuse, positive relationships, cyberbullying - you name it - is not a school actively trying to protect everyone's children from violence then I don't know what is.

To get back on topic, I don't think that this means homeschooling is the best way forward. These problems don't just go away because you don't face them.

I'm a much stronger person for having faced, dealt with and survived bullying.

 

[EvilWillow]

Well, I'd much rather my children be at home and learn the thing that I want them to learn, not what a school thinks they should learn, or what their friends think.

I have nothing against teachers, and I admire them, even though I have had some horrible ones.
[MENTION=8858]Flannen[/MENTION], I do have a question if you can answer it. If I do not wish my child to be taught about sex in school, can I request that my child not be present during said discussion?

 

[Flannen]

[MENTION=8858]Flannen[/MENTION], I do have a question if you can answer it. If I do not wish my child to be taught about sex in school, can I request that my child not be present during said discussion?

In the UK, absolutely. Over here, the parents tend to get called in for a meeting and see and hear what their children will be taught and can then state whether or not they wish for their child to be present.

I can't speak for anywhere else, although some of our teachers might be able to be more specific, but I would be surprised if you couldn't opt for your child to be taken out of the session.

I have a question in turn too 🙂 (and to others who prefer homeschooling)

Your first bit of your last post about wanting your children to learn what you want them to learn, do you mean in terms of the curriculum? If so, would you not enter your children into exams/finals or whatever they might be called, to receive their high school qualifications?

 

[Buffy Summers]

I know in my local school district, the parents have to sign a permission slip for their child to be present in the "sex" discussion.

 

[EvilWillow]

Great to hear! I think sex is one of those things to be taught a home and not at school.

With my career I wont have time to homeschool but I've heard private school is better in terms of education.

Thanks for sharing! My boys are still toddlers so I have a lot to learn haha

 

[HalloweenRain]

And quitting isn't the solution to bullying, whether it's a club, school, job or anything.

That's certainly true in most cases. However, not every person is tough enough to face bullying head-on. I once told the administration about a boy who had picked on me so severely I went home crying almost every day. He was suspended after it was proven, but all of his friends became even worse. I told on them as well, and even tried standing up for myself. My life became so filled with negativity I tried to kill myself. I did switch schools, and life was so much easier. Nobody knew any of the things that creep had said about me, and nobody cared that I was new. I stopped feeling so helpless and I learned that there was nothing wrong with me. I wouldn't force someone in that situation to stand up and bark down the bullies just because it seems like the best idea to me. It's not always fair to ask someone to do that for the sake of the ideal "solution".

 

[Vamp Jenny]

I don't know if it is because the educational system in Quebec is so different than yours (and I'm talking about everyone, here), but I just don't get all your arguments for homeschooling... Bullying is something that can be changed and I see more and more people joining the cause against bullying, even in the US (the movie Bully, that should be out tomorrow in theaters is a good example). It's not something that can be changed overnight, but it is better than it used to be.

As for sex related discussions in class... I had this class and, sincerely, I didn't need it, but that is because my mom was very open about that at home. But not every parent is like that. And I think, in an oversexualised(sp??) society like ours, that it is very important that teens learn how to protect themselves... One of my friends would probably not have gotten pregnant 3 times in high school if she'd had that class...

 

[Buffy Summers]

What I was trying to point out is that it also isn't fair to expect someone to just quit something if they're bullied.

 

[EvilWillow]

As for sex related discussions in class... I had this class and, sincerely, I didn't need it, but that is because my mom was very open about that at home. But not every parent is like that. And I think, in an oversexualised(sp??) society like ours, that it is very important that teens learn how to protect themselves... One of my friends would probably not have gotten pregnant 3 times in high school if she'd had that class...

I am just as capable to teach my child about sex than a stranger. My children wouldn't need to take a class to learn about the body and their sexuality. Besides, school don't teach abstaining until marriage, and that is something I feel very strongly about for my children.

 

[Buffy Summers]

I don't think Vamp Jenny was implying that you weren't capable. 🙂

Our sex ed class did actually teach that abstaining was the only sure form of birth control.

 

[Vamp Jenny]

Well, I'd much rather my children be at home and learn the thing that I want them to learn, not what a school thinks they should learn, or what their friends think.

Now please please please don,t take this the wrong way but: doesn't that keep them from making their own choice on their beliefs and values? As school is supposed to be an objective place to learn and make your own choices. But isn't homeschooling - in the way you describe - just a tool to raise your children to your beliefs and values, leaving no place for their choices???

 

[EvilWillow]

I don't think Vamp Jenny was implying that you weren't capable. 🙂

Our sex ed class did actually teach that abstaining was the only sure form of birth control.

That's not the only reason I want them to abstain.

Now please please please don,t take this the wrong way but: doesn't that keep them from making their own choice on their beliefs and values? As school is supposed to be an objective place to learn and make your own choices. But isn't homeschooling - in the way you describe - just a tool to raise your children to your beliefs and values, leaving no place for their choices

I don't think there is anything wring with wanting to teach my children the good morals and values that I was taught.