Incorrect Quotes #3

[TheXandyman]

Drusilla: *eyeing up dogs in a pen* Ooh, Spike I like this one. He's so friendly and full of life! Look at all that fur and those big doey eyes. I want him!
Spike: That's a possum, Dru. It came in from the street...

Next: BuffyBot

 

[BibliophileAnn]

Buffybot: I mean, sure, I have my bad days, but then I remember what a cute smile I have.

Next: Xander

 

[NotASlayer]

Buffy: *on seeing Xander shopping* Xander, why do you have like, a million gallons of maple syrup?
Xander: An has this idea she wants to try. You see...
Buffy: *hands over ears* STOP TALKING NOW!

Next: Lilah

 

[TheXandyman]

Lilah: I've started a business. I call it 'Mind your own'.

Next: Darla

 

[BibliophileAnn]

Darla: If I stay in bed I'll be warm. If I get in the shower, I'll also be warm. But the distance between the bed and shower? No. That is not warm.

Next: Jesse

 

[TheXandyman]

Jesse: So i went to a psychic today and she told me i'm gonna live a long and healthy life.

Next: Anne

 

[BibliophileAnn]

Anne: I've never encountered a problem that can't be solved by a spontaneous musical number.

Next: Merrick

 

[NotASlayer]

Merrick: Guess I didn't outlive this Slayer after all. That's annoying.

Next: Jenny Calendar

 

[BibliophileAnn]

Jenny Calendar: I would say I outdid myself, but I’m always this good, so I simply did myself.

Next: Eddie

 

[NotASlayer]

Eddie: This job just gets weirder every day.
Faith: You ain't seen nothing yet.

Next: Giles

 

[BibliophileAnn]

Giles: My dad has a spiked collar.
Giles: *dog

Next: Caridad

 

[NotASlayer]

Caridad: Bet you had to search my name, didn't you? We all blended together...

Next: The Mayor

 

[BibliophileAnn]

The Mayor: You can de-escalate literally any situation by asking ‘are we about to kiss?’
The Mayor: Doesn't work with getting out of speeding tickets, though.

Next: Veruca

 

[NotASlayer]

Veruca: Here, I use this. *passes a bottle to Oz*
Oz: *reading* "For a healthy and shiny coat"... this is dog shampoo.

Next: Faith

 

[BibliophileAnn]

Faith: Theater kids are just choir kids who joined forces with the band and strings kids.

Next: Kathy Newman

 

[NotASlayer]

Kathy Newman: Don't worry, Buffy, you've never had a roommate like me.
Buffy: I've never had a roommate before. And why should I worry?
Kathy: There's nothing to worry about. Like I said. Nothing at all.
Buffy: Now I'm starting to worry...

Next: Gunn

 

[BibliophileAnn]

Gunn: Sweet dog you got there.
Police: Yes, this is our new drug sniffing dog.
Gunn: Still training huh?
Police: What do you mean?
Gunn
Gunn: Never mind.

Next: Larry

 

[NotASlayer]

Larry: It's been really liberating.
Xander: What has?
Larry: Coming out.
Xander: Oh.
Larry: Yes, I am a Trekkie and I'm not afraid to say it.

Next: Giles

 

[TheXandyman]

Giles: I have over a hundred books on my shelf filled with all the knowledge you can hope for and i challenge you to read just one.
Buffy: Challenge accepted. I choose...this one!
Giles: That's a copy of the shining...

Next: Amy Madison

 

[NotASlayer]

Amy: No, I am not obsessed with rats. I just don't know how to turn people into anything else.
Willow: What about a mouse?
Amy: ...
Amy: I didn't think of that.

Next: Buffy