Incorrect Quotes #3

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Wesley: So my therapist was talking to me and she said that I really just need to break down my walls and let people in.
Wesley: So I’ve decided to break the fourth wall.
Wesley: *looks at camera* Hi there. I use humor as a coping mechanism.

Next: Oz
 
Oz: It is indeed a most curious situation. I believe that we will need to extensively investigate it to determine just what is going on here.
*Everyone looks at him*
Oz: I mean "Huh."

Next: Tara
 
Tara: I scare people a lot because I walk very softly and they don't hear me enter rooms. So when they turn around, I'm just kind of there and their fear fuels me.

Next: Willow
 
Willow: If I needed a coven, I would’ve been a Cordette by now, following the queen bee around, begging for her approval. There’s power in me.. I can feel it bubbling up.. and it could make Queen C tremble.
 
Anya: I believe I know why you are so reluctant to date a woman, Buffy. It is because you do not know how sex works between two women.
Buffy: You aren't suggesting I ask Willow or Tara?
Anya: Of course not -
Buffy: Thank god!
Anya: - I know myself perfectly well how it works and could tell you -
Buffy: Oh god.
Anya: - but even that is no longer necessary, thanks to the advance of technology. I asked Willow if she or Tara could recommend an instructional video. *holds out a VHS tape*
Buffy: *looks at it in horror* Anya... this is lesbian smut!
Anya: Really? It seemed educational. Xander and I found it most illuminating. I even made notes of the bits you really need to watch.

Next: Giles
 
Willow: Hi Tara.
Tara: I'm gay and I think you're hot.
Willow: ...
Tara: So, what did you want to talk about?

Next: Angel
 
Angel: I dont really read. I just pretend to read so that people dont bother me.


Next: Skip
 
Jesse: So, anyway, I'm starting this new job soon. I have a good feeling about it. I think it could run for years.

Next: The Master
 
The Master: Assert your dominance over your friends by kicking them in the face, and then giving them a little smooch on the forehead!

Next: Darla
 
Darla: People are like a Mcdonalds milkshake - children are a small and adults are a regular. But children are like french fries - you can eat several without feeling full.


Next: Vampire Willow
 
Cop: Can you describe the person who stabbed you? Vampire Willow: Lithe, spirited, outgoing, and not afraid to speak their mind. They were a raw sexual force and they knew it. They were a dandelion fluff on a summer day, gone in an instant, leaving you with nothing but a memory of their touch and the faint taste of strawberries on your lips. Cop: …Great, we have a motive, but we still need a description.

Next: Vampire Xander
 
Vampire Xander: Why do people always pair me with Willow? I am my own individual! I'm not always with her! I have a separate life!
Vampire Willow: Technically, you're dead Xander.

Next: Professor Walsh
 
Walsh: miss summers if you think this class is the seventh circle of hell just wait til you see what I have planned for midterms.

Next: Jinx
 
Wesley: Cordelia, what are you watching?
Cordelia: A very rivetting documentary about Egyptians.
Wesley: Cordelia, this is a fictional film called 'the Mummy'.

Next: Buffybot
 
Buffybot: I like to play this game called nap roulette. I take a nap and don’t set an alarm. Will it be 20 min or 4 hours? Nobody knows. It’s risky and I like it.

Next: Adam
 
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