I've come to terms with Parker

F

fly on the wall

you have but-face.
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..or, rather, Buffy's complete obsession with Parker after their hook-up.

It drove me insane, how broody and depressed and, let's face it, completely naive she was about Parker (especially when trying to convince Willow that maybe his father's death was to blame for his actions, etc). In my opinion up until now, her reaction was unnecessary, overdramatic, and a tad bit hypocritical (compared with her reaction to Willow's moping after Oz leaves). It just didn't make sense to me--Buffy never seemed this upset when any of her actual relationships failed.

But I've figured it out and so I thought I'd share (even though I'm sure plenty of you have already come to this conclusion. I'm a bit slow on uptakes that annoy me 😛). Buffy's only other sexual interaction was with Angel. And as we know, that flopped miserably. They did it, he lost his soul and turned evil and started killing her friends (a good metaphor for what Parker was to do, actually..turn into a total jerk after the sex has been had). Parker's sexual interest in Buffy was welcomed and embraced...for the first time since the abysmal mistake of sex with Angel, Buffy felt seductive, desired, and in control of her sexual endeavors. Not to mention almost positive that Parker was human, a good guy, and unlikely to result like Angel. Her sexual self-confidence had been shattered since her first and only experience, and sleeping with Parker was a way to piece some of it back together.

But then he DID result like Angel, just in a different way. Just like her night with Angel, the next morning Buffy wakes up alone. Parker didn't lose his soul, but he did reveal himself to be a jerk and a total scumbag. The sex had been casual for him; but for Buffy, it had been about redemption and self-discovery. And THAT is why she moans on and on about it for so long.

Still annoying, but at least I can better understand why she's being so annoying now. 😛

Thoughts?
 
palabravampiress
palabravampiress
Excellent post!
I agree! I also think her behavior was meant to say, "Hey, even though she's beautiful and super-strong and the Slayer, she still feels insecure and rejected when a normal guy acts like a jerk to her." It was another way to help the fans relate to Buffy, I think.
 
BuffyElevated
BuffyElevated
Very well said. :D I agree!
Oh god, i loved the way Willow reacted to Parker...ahh...goodness

The difference between Angel and Parker, however, is that parker had a soul....and he still acted like ajerk, the thing that I find strange, however, is Angeus just seems to blindly want to maim and kill, whereas someone else, say, Harmony can survive not killing Humans, without a soul. Souless Angel just seems a little less...reigned in then say, Harmony, Drusilla or even Darla. sorry, OT. What I'm trying to say here is, um, That parker was just THAT GUY, ya know?

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Edit:
[br][/br]
Sorry, I still haven't mastered composing my thoughts.
 
^ Well, that's what I think hit Buffy the hardest. Parker HADN'T lost his soul, and he was STILL a jerk to her after they slept together. It must have wreaked havoc on her confidence.
 
fly on the wall said:
..or, rather, Buffy's complete obsession with Parker after their hook-up.

It drove me insane, how broody and depressed and, let's face it, completely naive she was about Parker (especially when trying to convince Willow that maybe his father's death was to blame for his actions, etc). In my opinion up until now, her reaction was unnecessary, overdramatic, and a tad bit hypocritical (compared with her reaction to Willow's moping after Oz leaves). It just didn't make sense to me--Buffy never seemed this upset when any of her actual relationships failed.

But I've figured it out and so I thought I'd share (even though I'm sure plenty of you have already come to this conclusion. I'm a bit slow on uptakes that annoy me 😛). Buffy's only other sexual interaction was with Angel. And as we know, that flopped miserably. They did it, he lost his soul and turned evil and started killing her friends (a good metaphor for what Parker was to do, actually..turn into a total jerk after the sex has been had). Parker's sexual interest in Buffy was welcomed and embraced...for the first time since the abysmal mistake of sex with Angel, Buffy felt seductive, desired, and in control of her sexual endeavors. Not to mention almost positive that Parker was human, a good guy, and unlikely to result like Angel. Her sexual self-confidence had been shattered since her first and only experience, and sleeping with Parker was a way to piece some of it back together.

But then he DID result like Angel, just in a different way. Just like her night with Angel, the next morning Buffy wakes up alone. Parker didn't lose his soul, but he did reveal himself to be a jerk and a total scumbag. The sex had been casual for him; but for Buffy, it had been about redemption and self-discovery. And THAT is why she moans on and on about it for so long.

Still annoying, but at least I can better understand why she's being so annoying now. 😛

Thoughts?
Click to expand...

I completely agree.

I also think that the Parker thing went a long way toward lifting Buffy's naivete with regard to men. Her attitude about her love affair with Angel was a typical teenage romantic attitude. Angelus didn't quite shatter those hopes, as he had the convenient excuse of being soulless. I think having a human man behave so abominably gave her a more realistic -- if also more jaded -- perspective that she carried with her into all of her future romantic interactions. In a way, it sort of caused her to lose her innocence and expand her ideas, which I think went nicely with the idea of transitioning into the more independent lifestyle of a college student.
 
fly on the wall said:
^ Well, that's what I think hit Buffy the hardest. Parker HADN'T lost his soul, and he was STILL a jerk to her after they slept together. It must have wreaked havoc on her confidence.
Click to expand...

mm. I think you may be right. The fact that he is just a jerk. Oh and trying to sleep with her best friend?!

That was just....low
 
JasperFan said:
mm. I think you may be right. The fact that he is just a jerk. Oh and trying to sleep with her best friend?!

That was just....low
Click to expand...

Yes! I agree. Trying to sleep with Willow was just incredibly low. I vote Parker as the most likely to regret his college experience... next time he goes in for a checkup.
 
For some reason while reading this thread, I suddenly got a vision of Parker as Harm's new minion, and now I can't get it out of my head. Talk about a match made in heaven...or hell.
 
Hehehe. You always come up with the best ideas, WA. I would love to see Parker being bossed around by Harm. Oooh! Maybe he could be her personal assistant now that she has her own show. That would be hilarious!
 
I don't think its too far out there for someone to be obsessed after a brief hook-up. I've seen people that have been dumped on, but still pine for that person for a long time. They will make excuses for how a person acts just to justify their own action of still going after them in hopes that they might be able to change ways, or that they might be able to change that person. It's all too common behavior.

On a side note Parker fed her all this BS making him see more mysterious and darker.

Riley on the other hand wasn't really dark or mysterious at all. He was kind of bland. What you see it is what you get. Look at how long(or not so long) it took her get over him in comparison with her lengthy relationship him, and then look at the time spent after her very brief one with Parker.
 
IDoDoodle said:
I don't think its too far out there for someone to be obsessed after a brief hook-up. I've seen people that have been dumped on, but still pine for that person for a long time. They will make excuses for how a person acts just to justify their own action of still going after them in hopes that they might be able to change ways, or that they might be able to change that person. It's all too common behavior.
Click to expand...
Oh, I definitely agree. I just think it's very uncommon for Buffy. She doesn't usually sweat the small stuff. I mean, she pined for Parker in ways she didn't pine for Angel, Riley, or Spike, and it seemed really off to me. Or, rather, it did until I thought about it on these terms.
 
Yeah, I don't know, she is a strong woman being the slayer and all, but emotionally she is just one of us. I might have to go back and watch that arc again to try and get inside of her head I suppose.
 
IDoDoodle said:
I don't think its too far out there for someone to be obsessed after a brief hook-up. I've seen people that have been dumped on, but still pine for that person for a long time. They will make excuses for how a person acts just to justify their own action of still going after them in hopes that they might be able to change ways, or that they might be able to change that person. It's all too common behavior.

On a side note Parker fed her all this BS making him see more mysterious and darker.

Riley on the other hand wasn't really dark or mysterious at all. He was kind of bland. What you see it is what you get. Look at how long(or not so long) it took her get over him in comparison with her lengthy relationship him, and then look at the time spent after her very brief one with Parker.
Click to expand...

I think Buffy needed the "what you see is what you get" part of Riley.

As far as pining after Parker goes, I don't think you can really glean too much insight about either Riley or Parker based on how long Buffy pines after them. Instead, I think you can gain insight into Buffy's character. Pining and moping about Parker wasn't about Parker; it was about Buffy's battered pride and the associations with Angel. Also, Buffy felt that she was a wronged, innocent victim, so she could openly mope and complain and then garner sympathy. I'd mentions stuff about her reaction to Riley, but that's season 5. 🙂
 
Kean
Kean
[No message]
I made the comment about Buffy being being just like one of us on the inside. Parker emotionally traumatized her, she made excuses for him, in spite of Willow telling her that Parker is a jerk who should be quickly forgotten. So she blames herself. I think you can forgive Buffy for having doubts and for being confused. She had only had sex twice. It turned Angel into a monster, and revealed a monster within Parker. That's going to mess with anyone. Buffy made a mistake was in not knowing her lovers better. Parker had a smooth line and wasn't afraid to use it, repeatedly. Even after hearing him run the same line by another girl she still held out hope for a relationship with him.


Parker noticed her scar from Angel biting her and in a way made a connection albeit metaphorical. The scar is a sign of her love for Angel, while Parker left her emotionally scarred because of his insensibility.

I was trying to glean insight into Buffy's mind and not the others. I was trying to compare and contrast Parker's and Riley's personalities. Doesn't Spike even comment on this at one point? I'm not sure.

Riley was definitely the right guy for her at that moment giving her some much needed confidence. He was the complete opposite of Angel and Parker.
 
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