'Mad As A March Hare' *S3 Spoilers*

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*Chase Angel*

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A/C Shipper
Rating- 15 *just to be safe.
This was a reply to a challenge on an Angel fan-fic site.



"What's wrong Angel? You've been more broody than usual today, and your son just wont go to sleep cos he knows his daddy's grumpy" Cor kissed Connor's head. She was sitting on the couch in the lounge of Hyperion. Angel was pacing Wesley's office. Angel looked at his son and his beautiful friend and grew even more worried. Today he had been jittery, and as Cor said, even more broody than usual. "Come on daddy- Sit down and tell us all about it." Cor smiled. Angel moved toward them and sat down on the couch beside Cor, holding Connor's tiny little hand in his own. "We've been through a lot together, right?" "Does that even need to be stated?" Cor smiled. "You promise you wont judge me" "Since when have you cared what I think?" Cor laughed. "Don't say that! I always care what you think." Angel snapped then quickly reprimanded himself. This attitude certainly wasn't going to earn him any points. "As Angelus, I did a lot of heinous things"¦" "You mean "˜grrr' guy did a lot of heinous things- You were just in the same body as him. "Whatever way you want to see it- I was there- I did it." "Ok"¦." Cor didn't know where this was heading. " I had a dream this morning- more like clips of past events- Something that happened 100 years ago to this day" "Like an anniversary reminder or something?" "You could say that." Angel looked at his Cora, sitting patiently listening whilst Connor played with her hair, and smiled. He couldn't help it, he loved them both, and was so happy, maybe that's why this thing was eating him up so much. "Please don't interrupt while I tell you this- I have to tell you. This is why I had the dream and what events the dream were of"¦." "Ok" "I told you not to interrupt" Angel smiled. Cor gave him a look that meant "˜get on with it' "100 years ago today I killed someone. I was still Angelus, it was just before the Gypses cursed me- In fact only a few weeks before. I was in Italy, I hadn't caught up with Darla yet. A man in the village- a Watcher, one of the Council's was about to become a father. He had been in love with a whore, she never paid attantion to him- couldn't afford to- she had no money except that she got for services rendered. After years of pleading with her the whore- Clara, agreed to marry this Watcher. Shortly after they were married she became pregnant.
 
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The Watcher was the happiest man alive- he believed. The day Clara gave birth- I was there, I watched through the window, saw her gave birth. She died from childbirth, it tore him apart but he still had a part of her left, he had his son. I waited while he grew attached to the baby. Once the bairn was almost a day old, I went into their house- I had been to Clara weeks before- she still wanted the money, she was still on the game. He never knew it. I killed the bairn, snapped it's neck as the father watched. I destroyed him- he reverted to the black arts, and went to chaos, destroyed everyone that was happy- crossed to the other side. I did all that, for fun." Angel began to sob- Cor who had been patiently quiet for so long, now could not find the words to say. She pulled him to her, and hugged him. She kissed both of her boys on the head. "That wasn't you, Angel, it wasn't you." The scene was broken by a little yawn coming from Connor. "I'd better take him to bed I'll be back down in a minute- Will you be OK here?" Angel nodded, she kissed him again on the head. Angel watched as Cor headed upstairs, a sleeping Connor in her arms. He walked out into the moonlight of the garden. A shadowy figure approached him. "No" Angel mouthed. "I have waited for so long. I have lived for this. I will not be hear but I will know in my heart that you have paid for what you did to my family. For you will do the same to your own. May you show you own son the same pity you showed mine." Angel cried out as a bright light cracked the sky between himself and the Watcher. The Watcher whispered some words, and then fell to the ground. His dead body immersed in the ground. A few moments later, Angel fell to his knees in agony.
 
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Cor walked down the stairs of Hyperion smiling to herself- Connor had been asleep peacefully, she was glad. She walked into the lobby but couldn't see Angel. "Angel" she called as she walked out into the garden. She saw him standing against a wall. "Angel" she smiled. He turned and she knew then. "Stay back Angelus" Cor glared at the figure standing before her. She knew who it was, knew that Angel wouldn't make the hair stand up on the back of her neck (not because of fear anyway). You know Cordy- You always were the one person who could always tell Angel and I apart- I respect that." "Maybe it has something to do with the fact 'Angel isn't evil'" "You're right," Angelus moved toward her, stepping into the light of the reception area, "You know I hate when I turn into him, when I'm 'Angel'" "You're not Angel, you'll never be Angel" Cordelia glowered. "Smart girl. And I'm glad because Angel is weak, whereas I am strong." "You're strong?," Cor's eyebrows raised, "You're pathetic" she spat. "No, I think you may have me confused with Angel, Nancy 'ooh, look at me, I'm in love' boy" Angelus made a disgusted face as if he were about to wretch. " Yeah, but the Slayer could kick your ass" Cordy stood her ground, leaving space between herself and Angelus. "I'm not talking about her. Angel, lovesbitch that he was, never in all his lifetime stooped so low as to love someone this much. It makes me feel dirty, there's disgusting sleaze crawling under my skin, reaching out to you, for salvation. This is worse than anything I've ever experienced stuck in soul boy's body- this is like a disease- so I'm going to end it." Angelus stalked toward Cor, and smiled up at her. "I don't understand" was all Cor could think to say. "Sure you do," Angelus stopped walking and looked up at her, "Though I'm guessing it might take a while. Angel isn't too fond of smart women- learned that from experience." "Smart women send you to hell." Cor bit. Angelus growled gutteral, and began toward her. "Mind you, Angel isn't known to be too fond of brunettes either. Maybe he's gaining taste in his old age" Angelus circled Cordelia, close, and tugged at her hair, sniffing it. "Don't touch me" Cordelia recoiled. Angelus moved across the room, "Testy, aren't we?! I used to respect that. Now I just wanna kill you for it. You're making me this way." Angelus tipped over the magazine table which was in front of him. Cor jumped slightly, "Look Angelus, I don't know why you're here or what happened..... Angel should be standing here....I don't know what you want..... Angel was...." " Well baby, I'm here and you're just gonna have to live with it.... or not" Angelus morphed into vamp face, and ran his tongue over his fangs. Cor backed away, and held onto the table for support. Angelus stalked across the room toward her, and she backed away further. Cor stumbled backward over a customary green chair in the lounge area which sent her over to the desk. Angelus swiped the desk from under her grasp, causing her to fall to the ground. Angelus grabbed her wrist and yanked her to her feet. Suddenly cryng was heard over the baby monitor, now on the floor (along with the stake which had been stashed in the desk drawer). Cor saw Angelus' expression change, and was terrified- saw him look toward the staircase. Angelus dropped her back to the ground, and she winced as her head connected with the cold stone of the floor. She quickly regained her senses and struggled to her feet. She realised Connor was in danger, judging by the feral look on she had witnessed on Angelus' face. She saw Angelus take the stairs, two at a time, and grabbed the stake, running for the 'Servant's Staircase.' Never before had her legs indulged in such speed, she hurtled upwards, kicking off her black strappy Jimmy Choo's in the process. She reached the first floor corridor and caught sight of Angelus at the other end. They could both hear Connor crying. Cordelia knew she wouldn't be able to reach Connor's room first, it was at the other end of the corridor, a few feet away from Angelus. (It was at times like this she wished both she and Angel weren't so careful to keep Connor nearby to protect him), Angelus grinned at her and walked toward Connor's door.
 
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Cordelia ran- she knew she wasn't going to make it. Her brain wasn't functioning properly, her emotions were guiding her, as was her maternal instinct. Cordelia closed her eyes and threw herself forward. She dove on top of Angelus, forcing him to the ground. He writhed underneath her body as she straddled him. She poised the stake just above his heart. "You always were a feisty one." Angelus grinned, "Wanna see part of my trait?!" Cor snapped as she pressed the stake into his skin. "Hey! That tickles- Asre you trying to get me off?!" Angelus raised an eyebrow. "You're not going to make my baby" Cor seethed. "You'd like that, wouldn't you? Truth is Angel would never have sex with you cos he's afraid I'll come out to play." "If you harm one hair on that childs head- so help me God, I'll kill you." "You wouldn't have the balls" Angelus smiled, eyeing up Cordy's cleavage, "Try me" "Love to" Angelus grinned. "I swear" "You forget one thing- you kill me and you also kill your boy- and you wouldn't want to do that- do you really wanna leave the child without a father?" Cor knew he was speaking the truth, so she jumped up and ran toward Connor's door- the only option she had left. Angelus caught her wrist before she made it through the doorway. He spun her around, toward himand began doing the fox-trot with her up the corridor. Cor pulled away. "I'm just trying to introduce a little foreplay" Angelus grinned, pulling Cor toward him and twirling her into his embrace. Cor tried to pull away, but Angelus nuzzled her neck, and drew his face up to look into her eyes. "I never noticed before- but your eyes- they're different to Angel's" Cor was transfixed. "Of course they are- mine aren't putridly full of love" "Will you stop saying that? I don't understand, I don't know what you're talking about. Angel would tell me if he'd found someone." "Hello?!" Angelus used the knuckles of one hand to knock on her head, whilst holding her tight against his body with the other hand. "Sometimes I really do wonder about you Cordelia. You obviously don't know Angel. He's never been cursed by love like this before"¦. Ever. He loves this person so much that he wont admit to it, to protect her." Cor was silenced for a moment, pondering Angel's mystery woman and feeling overwhelmingly jealous. "You really are a nice piece of"¦." "Get away form me!" Cor cut Angelus off. "Say please" "Please" Cor yelled as Angelus' lips brushed against her cheek, making a trail toward her neck. "So now you're begging for it." Angelus smirked. Cor decided enough was enough, and did all she was capable of doing at that moment.- she moved her hand in the region of his groin, and finding he was pleased to see her, clamped her fist around his nether regions and squeezed for all she was worth. Angelus loosened his grip f her, whilst crying out in pain, "You bitch!" he seethed. "Don't I know it?!" Cor smiled as she moved out of his reach, and sweeped his legs from under him with a well aimed barefoot as he was protectively covering his groinal area. Cor quickly bolted for Connor's door as Angelus slid to the ground. Cor reached the door and turned quickly to find Angelus beside her, his eyes flashing angrily. Connor certainly wasn't the only one in danger. She had never witnessed an angel with so much hatred and rage. Cordelia took a deep breath, shoved the door open and ran through. She slammed the door shut and locked it. As soon as she had, the other side was attacked. The door reverberated angrily as Angelus pounded on the wood. The stake was on the other side of the door along with Angelus. Not that Cor would use the stake anyway- she just needed Angelus to think she would. Cor turned swiftly, aware again of the baby crying behind her. Her main priority was usually Connor, but right now her sonâ™s survival came before his comfort. She went over to the corner of the room and began using her shoulder to shift a rather large chest of drawers toward the door, all the while trying to soothe her son. "Ssssh Connor- Daddy's just a lil upset right now."
 
Continued

Eventually she moved the drawers in front of the the door, although, admittedly she wouldn't have been able to if she didn't have the strength of fear coursing through her veins. She now turned her attentions to Connor. She picked him up, out of his cot and hugged him to her, patting his back soothingly. She heard Angelus grunt as he tried to batter down the door- and pulled Connor tighter to her. Cor walked toward the window, looking for a means of escape. There was none, she found child safety bars on them. "˜Overprotective parents much?' she thought to herself. "Come out and I'll make your death quick." Angelus remarked. "You're not the first guy to offer me that" Cor smiled. Shards of wood splintered as the door heaved and tore apart at the top. Cor felt it right then- it wouldn't be long before she died- Before she lost herself to the one person she had every truly loved (well his physical form anyway). Angelus would be through that door in moments, all she could do was postpone him. "I'm going to enjoy this- it's been a long time since I killed anyone. This will be special. Yaou're the one thing that allows Angel to hold onto humanity. He loves you. And when you're gone he'll be so easy to break. Tjere will be nothing left to fight foe. Chaos will reign." Cor couldn't believe what she was hearing- no, not that part- that part- Angel loved her. She shook it off, Angelus was just playing with her to make her death more painful. With a groan the door gave way- the chest of drawers smashed onto the floor- the clock struck midnight- all simultaneously. Cor watched as Angelus slumped to the floor in front of her. He looked up in fer, and she knew it was Angel. " Your son wants you" she said simply, and walked away. "Cor please"¦ I" " No Angel, I'm not angry at you. I just want to leave." "Cor, all those things he said- it may not have been me but I do love you." "Now I'm angry." Cor walked out of the room, into the hall. Angel got up and followed to the doorframe where he stood. "Cor please"¦" "I know that you love her, and I have to walk away from that." "I can love either you or her." Cor didn't know how he had even gotten onto this subject, but she knew she wanted to end it, it was hurting her too much. "I'll make the choice for you- Her- There, decision made." She walked away. "Why are you walking away from me?" Angel asked. The toll of being Angelus, even for a short period of time caused devestation. "Do you know why Angel?! Do you know why?! I've never asked you to choose between me and Buffy, because"¦. Because I know how you'd choose. And it kills me. I have to walk away from you, from this"¦. Before I have to walk away from us"¦. It would hurt too much to walk away from us, and I can't do that. Goodbye Angel." "I can't love both you and Buffy" Cordelia was walking away, not daring to look back for fear she would falter. "There is only one woman I love." Cor halted, pain etched on her face. Angel saw the beautiful figure stop, and a glimmer of hope flicked insideim. Cordy closed her eyes and breathed deeply. "Exactly Angel"¦" she began to walk away from the again, away from Angel, from the one person she had ever truly loved. "Exactly."
 
Please forgive me

for all the typos. I'm ill. *sniffles*
 
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