Obesity

This isn't about being thin, this is about staying alive.

That comment right there is essentially why I made the choice to be a healthier person. My dad's doctor said something similar to that when he was talking with him after his heart surgery in the summer of 2009, and it stuck with me. I realized that I shouldn't want to lose weight just to be thin or just to look good; I should want to lose weight so I could be a healthier person, and live longer for my husband and my children. And that's the approach I take when I talk to my family and friends when trying to convince them to lose weight as well.
 
I'm fat and lazy. So what? Fat gives you something starting with "b" and ending with "oobs", so I'm not complaining. (sw)

That said, though, I am glad that I'm 35 kilos lighter nowadays than I was around '99. When you can't walk 100 yards in one go anymore and start risking suffocation under your own weight while sleeping, the fun pretty much is over. I'm definitely still firmly in the obese category with no intention of going out of it, TYVM, but not as morbidly anymore as back then.

Wow, I so don't think like you!
I hate having big boobs! It makes me look thicker than I really am. I could have looked much better with smaller boobs. I can give you everything I have if you want 🙂
 
BuffyElevated
BuffyElevated
I hate my big boobs too!! :D
I gotta say one thing... there are some overweight people who are healthier than some thinner people... just saying..... I know people who are 200 + pounds and who are older and they have not a thing wrong with them. Then I know tiny people about 110 pounds or so and they have diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol etc.

So honestly just because a person is bigger doesn't mean they aren't healthy, and happy.

When I was younger I hated myself for my weight and that I couldn't get it off.... and there are still some days i'm unhappy, but for the most part. I am who I am, and part of who I am is my size and I accept that. The way I see it if someone doesn't like me because I have a little extra to my frame.. well then the heck with them. I don't have anyone to please but myself because If i am unhappy and disgusted with myself well then everyone else will be too.

I agree with you Chosen Enemy I hate my chest size... I have such a hard time finding a good bra and then my back hurts so bad its not even funny. I've looked into reductions some but I don't think I could do it I dunno *shrugs* I'd be happy being 2 sizes smaller lol
 
BuffyElevated
BuffyElevated
VERY true...
I try not to judge people that I don't know. I feel sorry for them sure, but it's difficult to feel to sorry for people once you know that they just aren't looking after themselves.

It can't be a nice feeling to be that huge, nothing would be comfortable, and you'd always be kind of smelly and sweaty I would assume.

Also things like my boxing day party would have been plain uncomfortable for anyone that huge. We had a dozen people in a blow up pool with everyone in bathers and definitely no one obese. I would have hated to have been obese in that environment...

Sorry if I'm being a little rude or anything here, I'm trying not to be offensive towards anyone while still be honest about my feelings.
 
Z
zobothehobo
I don't smell bad... and I'm pretty comfortable most of the time. I mean, I get uncomfortable like I'd imagine skinny people do too... but my weight doesn't really make it uncomfortable.
November
November
Hey I wasnt taking my shirt off with all those skinny chics around :p
I think there is honestly a happy medium. I am between 5'5" and 5'6", and I have never been smaller than about 155 lbs. I don't think I would like to ever be smaller than about 140-145 lbs, because to me women should be softer and curvier. I, for one, LOVE my big boobs. They aren't gargantuanly big, but a nice, solid D-DD. The reason I am currently annoyed with my weight is because since I have graduated college and got a full time sit-down desk job, I have gained about 20 lbs. I have gone from 160 up to 180, and my clothes don't fit. It's annoying.

That being said, weight problems and obesity itself are caused by a number of things. It's not solely because someone is lazy, or because someone has medical problems, but is determined by a variety of factors including race, heredity, medical history/medical problems, activity level, socioeconomic status, job, etc. etc. It's really a quite facinating subject.

As someone also said above, someone can be MUCH healthier being overweight by a few lbs than underweight. It all depends on what you eat. I (for one) rarely drink soda of any kind (think maybe once a month), rarely drink alcohol (again, think once every 2-3 months), and eat more or less healthy. I don't eat fast food all that often (maybe once every week). I could always eat more veggies (they are usually a side instead of the main course) and loads more fruit. My problem is portion size and self control. I have none. I'm not someone who can eat just one piece of candy; I want the whole bag. And I know that. I could also be alot more active than I am. I'm working on that. Also, as Zobo mentioned earlier, eating healthy can get REALLY expensive really fast. One easy remedy: start your own veggie garden! Not only do you get fresh veggies full of nutrients, it's also GREAT exercise. I'm all for gardening.


Goldi, I would like to also reach out and say, from your posts, I AM WORRIED ABOUT YOU. Worrying about less than one pound weight gain is serious. It is normal for a person's body weight to fluctuate a little throughout the day or over a weekend. Some people fluctuate up to 5 lbs in a day; again, this is normal.

At your height and weight, your BMI (body mass index) is 20.3, which is on the low end of normal. Normal is considered anywhere between 18.5 and 24.9. I have to caution you thought that BMI is a HORRIBLE indicator of an individual person's own health when it comes to weight. It works alot better when you look at a wide population (no pun intended) as opposed to individual. Your mental attitude towards weight is scaring me, and it makes me really concerned about you. I would encourage you to talk with someone about this. I also saw Portia de Rossi on Ellen last week, and she was talking about her book which chronicles her own struggles with weight. Although I haven't read it yet myself (I plan to) I would recommend you think about taking a look at it. Actually, I would recommend that we all take a look about it, it sounds like a great read.

Just want to let you know that if you do ever need a proverbial ear, I'm always here to listen.
 
BuffyElevated
BuffyElevated
Very well said honey!
PrincessBuffy16
PrincessBuffy16
I <3 your banner!
I have an eating disorder. Not sure whether that's made me overweight or I have it because I'm overweight.

Yes, see, someone with an eating disorder can be overweight. I am so sick and tired of "but you don't look too thin" etc.

Anyway, I'm somewhere on the spectrum between bulumic and compulsive over-eating; and have been formally diagnosed with bulumia and also EDNOS. It's great fun.
 
I
InsaneMystic
see below. :)
I have an eating disorder. Not sure whether that's made me overweight or I have it because I'm overweight.

Yes, see, someone with an eating disorder can be overweight. I am so sick and tired of "but you don't look too thin" etc.

Anyway, I'm somewhere on the spectrum between bulumic and compulsive over-eating; and have been formally diagnosed with bulumia and also EDNOS. It's great fun.
So with you on that, I'm definitely on the eating disorder side, too - purely compulsive overeating, though, on my side. I've not had any more eating binge attacks ever since I've gone on my anti-dep meds three years ago, so I consider myself mostly recovered from it nowadays... but when I still had them, there wasn't all that much difference between my binges and a bulimia attack, except that I'd have kept it in. COE definitely is the eating disorder with the least amount of public awareness for it.
 
So with you on that, I'm definitely on the eating disorder side, too - purely compulsive overeating, though, on my side. I've not had any more eating binge attacks ever since I've gone on my anti-dep meds three years ago, so I consider myself mostly recovered from it nowadays... but when I still had them, there wasn't all that much difference between my binges and a bulimia attack, except that I'd have kept it in. COE definitely is the eating disorder with the least amount of public awareness for it.

I don't have a diagnosed disorder, but I definitely have an unhealthy attitude to food. It doesn't really have to do much with my looks (as I said I'm not overweight), but I go through periods of time (especially when I'm very stressed) where I alternately binge and starve myself. I tend to "punish" myself with food deprivation and I have tried to see how long I can go without food (and then I carve in and order a family-size pizza). I know it's unhealthy, but when I'm under a lot of pressure (exams, hand-in dates etc) I really can't help myself.
 
I tried many times during the last years to make myself throw up. But never could, it just didn't happen. If I could I probably would have been a bulumic, for sure. Because I get so depressed if I eat something, anything, one bite. I hate feeling my tummy full, it makes me sick. Of myself. So yeah, I think I have some kind of eating disorder. I don't know if that counts.
 
C
Christopher
WTF? Sort it out, I know you're clever enough to not act on this feeling anymore.
I don't think I have an eating disorder. When I was younger, I 'tried' to be bulimic, but I was too disgusted by that. I don't have an compulsive overeating because I never eat too much at once. But I'm always chewing something - fruit, candy.. I think that's my problem.
 
Christopher agrees: WTF? Sort it out, I know you're clever enough to not act on this feeling anymore.

This is coming from a reason. When I was younger, I used to be very very thin and I was pretty athletic. Then I started gaining weight when I couldn't exercise anymore. And I was used to being that pretty girl. So when I started getting weight, it was sort of humilating. Especially in front of people I used to see a lot and haven't seen in a while. They'd see me and couldn't believe this was me. I couldn't stand that feeling.
 
C
Christopher
I understand but you know that vomming up food isn't the way to fix the issue. You know it and need to be warned away from it.
This is coming from a reason. When I was younger, I used to be very very thin and I was pretty athletic. Then I started gaining weight when I couldn't exercise anymore. And I was used to being that pretty girl. So when I started getting weight, it was sort of humilating. Especially in front of people I used to see a lot and haven't seen in a while. They'd see me and couldn't believe this was me. I couldn't stand that feeling.

I exactly know what you mean. Few years ago I ran on my old neibghour who moved from our street when I was around 6. She looked at me shocked, and said 'God, you changed so much' *big emberassing silence* '..you know, your face, and you're taller..' I was like, yeah right..
 
C
Christopher
Those that mind don't matter, and those that matter don't mind.
Christopher agrees: WTF? Sort it out, I know you're clever enough to not act on this feeling anymore.

If only it were that simple. Eating disorders, same way as most personality disorders, don't have anything to do with intelligence - if anything, the higher your IQ, the more susceptible you become.

Without meaning to brag, I know that I'm more than averagely intelligent. With that, I have higher expectations of myself, thus I get stressed and put myself under pressure to live up to them. Throw in an exam preparation phase and you have me, throwing all the good intentions overboard and living of two packs of weightwatchers tomato soup per day for a week.
 
C
Christopher
Yes I understand this. You understand the consequences so you need somebody to tell you to sort yourself out. Mayfever, sort yourself out. Don't make yourself ill, it's stupid and beneath you.
Christopher agrees: I understand but you know that vomming up food isn't the way to fix the issue. You know it and need to be warned away from it.

I don't do it often, haven't done that in a long time, and when I do I always fail. So I've never vomitted besides when I was sick.

Bulumia seems sometimes like the perfect solusion for the guilt feeling after everything you eat. It's like, you can eat whatever you want, because later on, you get rid of it very easy. It seems much simpler than eating healthy and exercise, for your entire life. I know it's bad, but you don't seem to undertand the horrible feeling of guilt. It's eating you from inside, and you lose the sense of judgment.
 
C
Christopher
You're right I don't fully understand the feeling of guilt. However the fact that you say you've pretty much overcome this problem is great, I'm really proud of you :)
The ones of you that are starving yourself, throwing up or binge eat - PLEASE, take these feelings seriously and go talk to someone! It can be a conselour (in your school, at your university, or at your health center for example), a friend or a parent, just please, talk to someone. I mean it. I get worried when I read this.

When you have an eating disorder it's really common to think that you don't have one and what you are doing isn't dangerous because you're only doing it once in a while or you feel you have control over it. Take it from someone who used to have a real problem - it doesn't work that way. The relationship you are having with food right now isn't healthy, it's destructive and have the potential to be (or allready is!) really dangerous.

If any of you want to talk, you can PM me. But I think the best thing all of you can do right now is find the courage to talk to someone near to you. I know it can be hard and even a little embarassing, but it's so worth it. You all deserve better than this.
 
C
Christopher
Great comment TYG. As an aide, can the fatties among you also remember that you can be helped and have people to talk to too.
Honestly, I've never understood eating disorders. Food does kinda gross me out though...

I do however understand fixations with one's weight. 😉 I used to weigh myself a lot, now it's just whenever I'm near my mom's scale, which isn't often. Of course we all have insecurities, there's a lot of emphasis on looking fit nowadays. I try to not talk about it too much though. If I'm honest, I'm a very slim girl, almost model thin (healthy though 🙂 ), and whenever I complain about my weight someone gets very pissed off. 😛 There's usually a chorused "Shut up".

Ah, the pain of being a lady, yes?
 
I'm very self conscious about my weight, always have been. Even if i am a bits chubby/fat in some areas. I do have compulsive over eating problems, probably because i have never fully respected myself to eat healthy foods and spend money on them.
I don't think i'm over weight, not yet anyways lol.
I'm between 5'5 and 5'6 and weigh 114lbs, (gained 10 pounds this year) kinda sucks.
But the only one to blame is myself. I'm just plain LAZY. Always have been, some days i don't even leave the house. :/ I suppose i should be well over weight, i think my mums 'skinny genes' must help with that. It really doesn't matter what size you are, as long as you are happy with yourself. But god, i love food too much, it's hard not to take sugar in my tea or cut out white bread and yummy fat spreads. Kinda sucks how people can live without these yummy things and still be on the over weight side. :/
 
Wishing Oceans
Wishing Oceans
You're about the same height as me, and believe me, you're NOT fat! In fact, by the sounds of it you're quite slim. :)
I've mentioned this before, but I'll throw it in here too just for the sake of convo.

I'm 5'6". A year ago I was 204. I don't think it was really that much, but the last time I was on the hospital scale that's what it said...even though I was in layers and had shoes on still. Either way, I decided I needed to lose some weight. Starting in february of 2009 I started to do moderate portion control. Instead of eating a whole pizza (which I could and still do occasionally) I will only have 3 or 4 slices. Stuff like that. Instead of 3 burgers, I'll have 2. What really offsets the heavy eating I do is the fact that I now do 6 - 7 miles a day on the treadmill and a half hour of liftin weights. So that burns about 1,400 calories a day and I USUALLY try to keep my calorie intake to be a little more above that. I'm 5'6" and 22-years-old. With cutting out 25-50% of what I normally eat and at least 90 minutes of work out a day...after 10 months...I now weigh 156. That's 48 pounds I lost.

I know I'd be smaller right now, but my biggest issue with fighting obesity is that I'm a binge eater, but more importantly an emotional eater. If I'm stressed, happy, sad, excited, whatever - my first response is to binge eat. I don't throw it up afterwards or anything like that, but I just intake A LOT more than I know I should. I have a feeling if I could get that in control I would be losing weight easier. I only want to lose another 6 pounds and then move what I have left over into some toned muscle.

In terms of other people...and I know this is going to sound terrible...but I think there's a limit. As stated, I understand people can't lose weight or gain weight for medical reasons. Aside from that concept, I can honestly admit that I am a little...well racist isn't the word because fat isn't a race, but I guess you could say bigoted? My boyfriend has a little chunk on him (just in his belly) and he's always calling himself fat. I always make the joke, "If I can't have John Cena, I'd rather have someone with a little chunk on them. Skinny people fall through cracks in the floor and die of starvation during sex." I would rather people be 10 pounds, 20 pounds, even 30 pounds overweight than be those disgustingly skinny people you see on tv. If I can see your bones, and you chose for it to be that way, no bueno. Curves mean you eat and you're healthy.

On the flip side though, there is a limit. I don't think it's acceptable for someone to be average height but 350-400 pounds. That's very unhealthy for that person and shows, at least to me, a tremendous lack of self esteem and control over yourself. There was an article out over the summer about a woman in New Jersey (my homestate) who wants to be the fattest person on earth. She WANTS to weigh somewhere around 1,400 pounds. This required here to eat over 10,000 calories a day. No, that's just...not right, sorry.

Mostly all of my friends are overweight by 20-30 pounds, and that is more than ok. However I'd be all over them like ugly on an osbourne if they started getting grossely overweight.

Here's a pic of me before and after, btw. I don't know if you'll be able to see it though unless ur my friend on FB. http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=459745744536&set=a.444148914536.225292.699354536
 
Kean
Kean
You are so remarkably like my friend Steve in terms of outlook on this topic and weight in general but especially in your transformation. He lost 77 pounds in the last year, the exact same way you have. Ye must have been separated at birth!
The ones of you that are starving yourself, throwing up or binge eat - PLEASE, take these feelings seriously and go talk to someone! It can be a conselour (in your school, at your university, or at your health center for example), a friend or a parent, just please, talk to someone. I mean it. I get worried when I read this.

When you have an eating disorder it's really common to think that you don't have one and what you are doing isn't dangerous because you're only doing it once in a while or you feel you have control over it. Take it from someone who used to have a real problem - it doesn't work that way. The relationship you are having with food right now isn't healthy, it's destructive and have the potential to be (or allready is!) really dangerous.

If any of you want to talk, you can PM me. But I think the best thing all of you can do right now is find the courage to talk to someone near to you. I know it can be hard and even a little embarassing, but it's so worth it. You all deserve better than this.

You are absolutely right and I agree with Christopher that this is an absolutely great post. As I said, I'm fully aware that my attitude to food is unhealthy at times and I have already alerted people around me to it, so they watch out for me when I'm in danger of falling off the wagon once more. As I said, the bingeing/starving only happens in phases of great stress, e.g. in the last two months because I was writing my dissertation, and it's probably gonna flare up again in late March when I'll be studying for my finals. My flatmate, who is also one of my best friends, knows about it and sees that I get enough nutrition. It's part of our deal - I force her to get up and go to class when she's depressed and she makes dinner for me when I have to study. I know it's not ideal, but I also know that you don't ever overcome an ED entirely, so this is how I deal.
 
T
This Year's Girl
Thank you. I'm glad you agree. And you and your roomie helping each other is really a step in the right direction! Yay you!
Honestly, I've never understood eating disorders. Food does kinda gross me out though...

That's probably because you're thin, and as you've said earlier, people often point out how thin you are, so you know eating disorder would probably make you even more thin.
 
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