Question Relationship Advice

Okay thanks a lot for hijacking my thread... next time start your own thread.... that was really rude.... and I expect an appology.... =(

Actually I think this was really rude of you to say. The topic is "relationship advice" which is what SS was seeking. And as there has been a plethora of useless threads that are all talking about the same thing and leading to the bandwidth issues this site has, SS was totally right to post her problems in this thread. Also you should apologize to her.

Now my advice. Slayerette, I would tell you not to get into a relationship with this woman right now. She doesn't need another man, especially since she is not even divoriced yet. She needs a friend. Be there for her, but DO NOT move across the country to go rescue her because all that will happen out of that is you become rebound guy and she moves on.

SS please PLEASE do not wait on this guy. I say go for it, but if he doesn't give you a straight out "yes I like you" then it's not worth it. It's just like Dancing Man and RockManic were saying. Don't let him string you along, cause even with your flawed Cangel loving ways you are way too much a hottie to wait around on some guy who may or may not like you. Plus you are in college. Party away girl!
 
Tueuse de Vampires
Tueuse de Vampires
flawed Cangel loving ways? lol that got me laughing :) thx for the advice
N
Nabila
Yes party! Young hearts must run free lol
L
Lou
Mine are 8 and 6 and I STILL can't shower in peace unless they happen to NOT BE HERE!
Have you met her in person yet? Because if you haven't, you should before you move.
I encourage her to leave her husband, no question. But things are different in real life than they are online and over the phone. You can never be too trusting of people you met online.
So you should definitely consider meeting up before you make a commitment as big as having her move halfway across the country, or the other way around. If you don't have the finances, then that's even more of a reason.
 
L
Lou
[No message]
I agree with Yam Sham.

I'm not saying this girl is a bold face liar, but just in normal life, this is a VERY touchy time for a woman. The first couple of years of a new baby can be REALLY tough on a woman. It's HARD to loose that weight and when you do lose it, you can't see it. You're constantly covered in gross things and smell like spoiled milk and getting a shower is like winning the lottery....getting a FULL shower anyway that doesn't have screaming in the background.

I'm starting to wonder if ANY man can get through this without a couple of scars and their wives hating them for apparently, "unknown" reasons. There ARE reasons we hate them, but not ones that make sense to THEM.

I'm not saying her husband is a decent and loving guy, but there is a BIG tendency for women in this position to....hmmmm, thinking of nice way to put this....over-state the situation.
Suddenly, not helping with the baby, showing up late for dinner, or forgetting to get the milk is a MAJOR flaw because it means they don't care, they think you're a pig and they don't want to make anything easier on you.
I remember one time, I felt like a bit "raped" because I had finally gotten the baby to bed...again...laid down, had the opprotunity for about 4 hours of sleep, finally passed out and woke up to a bit of a "surprise". I was NOT happy and felt like not only was I violated but that hubby was a worthless and heartless jerk and if I could have thrown him out the window, I would have. He didn't MEAN to be mean, in fact, I believe it when he says he was TRYING to be nice. It just didn't work.

I'm not saying this IS what is going on, but when dealing with a VERY needy woman, not just because of a bad relationship that she's not happy in, but with a new baby...the idea of an ear that's willing and ready to listen and be comforting, kind of has an effect on an already upset mind.

Other than the baby, the other thing that stood out was the parents moving across the country. Parents have a 6th sense about their children. And if things were HONESTLY that bad, they'd be forcing her to move with them not leaving her to deal with things. And they'd sense it whether or not she told them.

She may well have Post Partem too. It's ugly and can make the smallest things look like LARGE HORRIBLE events.

She OBVIOUSLY needs a friend, but if I were you, I wouldn't give up anything at the moment to help her. If she needs help, she'll flee with her parents, that is safe. And even if she does go with them, I'd take the other's advice and keep your distance.
Her husband didn't just TURN nuts. So, she might have a tendency to jump into relationships. And she sounds miserable enough to not be the type of person you'd WANT to jump into a relationship with until she regains her footing.

I know it's not what you wanted to hear, but I watch WAY too much Forensic Files!
 
R
randiann
Showers are so underrated! It's the best thing ever when I can shave both legs in the same shower and not just one! Or not playing "peek-a-boo" with the shower curtain
Advice to ANYONE:

Never mess with a married man or woman. Once they're divorced, then all is fair in love & war. But as long as they are legally married, nothing but heartache will follow.

Other sitch? - guy (or girl) says "there is a possibility for a relationship as he also likes me and everything, but he can't tell me when or if at all." - Rule of thumb? If someone WANTS to be with you - They will.
 
Back
Top Bottom