Spirit_Of_Fred
The Psycho
- Joined
- Oct 4, 2005
- Messages
- 1,918
😀
...and with a big, whopping smiley face she does so. some of you may have wondered where i have been for the past month or so. some of you may not care. some of you may not know me. to all of those i say, if you don't have any interest, do not bother reading further. this is part explanation, part personal-rant (sorry), and as some of you may know, i have a tendency to ramble on and write longer posts than i think i will half the time.
some of you still reading? okay, for those, here i go.
the long and short of it is that i have been (sadly) inactive on the boards for a small number of reasons. first and foremost, i am busy with life and work-like stuff in life. i always am. some of you may hear me constantly throw out that old excuse, "i'm really busy and i'm not sure i'll have time." then, 60% of the time, the next day you saw me doing whatever it was i claimed i could not do. so, apparently, im not a good judge of what makes me too busy. prime example: i was so busy i was gone for a month without warning. it got to the point where i couldn't find time to watch buffy, or do a lot of other things, even offline! it was frustrating, its a little better now.
second, i am dealing with some health problems now, of which i am still not sure of the whole story on, and of which i do not want to get into detail about. let me say this: it has not been fun. this was both painful and time consuming, and still goes on in part.
third, nanowrimo. for those of you who know what it is, you know how time consuming it can be. for those who dont, its basically this, quote, "competition" to write a 50,000 word novel in a month. not exactly giving with the extra time. either way, this is officially over now, and thus out of the picture side of editing stages.
finally, there was the fear, and here comes the less-explanation-more-personal-story-rant part. those who dont want to read the big long post, and just wanted the explanation, may avert their eyes now.
i have an issue with returning to the boards after i haven't. i realize that i may be a big dork in having this issue, but who knows? maybe im not alone. it was not so much of a worry the first couple of days, during which, again, i was sick and busy. but as time built up, everyday i planned to log on again, the dorky fear took hold of me. i thought "well, i've probably missed thousands upon thousands of posts by now! i'll never catch up!" and "how many events and in-jokes have i missed?" and "what should i tell people about where i was?" and "will i even be able to see any rep i've missed anymore?" 🙁 (come on; admit it! getting and reading your rep makes you feel good 😀). and of course, there's the most amusing one yet, which i hope will please you in its irony as much as it pleased me, "i submitted my huge 'why i come back to BB' response to the newsletter! how can i return when i haven't been back in days?!?!?!?" then days turned into a week, and a week into more weeks, and.....well, you get the picture.
i applaud those of you who are still reading. or maybe im more interesting than i thought 😛. anyway, today, i was just sitting at home, reading a book, when i was overcome with the desire to see if my response actually got in the BB newsletter. but, again with the fear, and i didn't want to log on. so....sneaky little me, i went on as a guest to check. just a quick skim. and in that quick skim, where pictures and avatars were invisible, people i didn't recognize posted in the feedback area, and i possibly recognize a name change (is Five By Five now Lindsey McDonald, or is my no-picture seeing self crazy?), i realized that i missed BB. i mean, i knew it already, but this was a fresh wave of it. after all, id been scared to even type the first three letters into my address bar for about a month!
still, i was not moved to log on again. i couldn't even bring myself to look at ANYTHING id missed beyond the newsletter (though my response did get into it :cheering🙂. too many posts! too many newbies! it was just too much. so i returned to my book. and thats when it hit me. i would call it an epiphany, but i think to elevate it to that level would demote any other epiphany in the world. but, call it what you wish, i had it. i began to think "you know, I miss BB. and i don't care about catching up! i mean, i keep saying i'll wait 'til i have more time to catch up, but by the time that actually HAPPENS, such a thing will be utterly impossible!" what i REALLY needed to do was just throw myself back into it. i know it will be weird. before i left, i checked so many posts as to leave "no new unread posts" each day. i will miss seeing that. i was considering joining irc chats and BBtv showings. i participated, or opted to participate, in a bunch of activities, and followed certain threads. it is doubtable that i will be able to catch up quickly to reading most of those threads in full, or get back to "no unread posts a day", but id rather deal with that and be back on the boards again! 🙂
bear in mind, i probably won't make many insightful or long posts anytime soon, especially in threads that require deep thought or lots of pages to read before the newest posts. but hey, if you haven't caught on by now, i sometimes go against what i say and post an elaborate post anyway. a more likely truth to bear in mind is that any irc or BBtv plans i had are on the back-burner now, and probably will be for a while. ......but you never know with me...........:whistle:
the way i see it, it's sort of like being a newbie again in someways. i was intimidated by the large boards when i first joined, and now it's like that again. HOWEVER, now i have advantages. i know a bunch of BBers, provided they haven't all disappeared like me too 🙂p), and i know the board rules and functions (except any that may have changed). that's nice, at least. and hey, in the grand scheme of things, i haven't been gone THAT long! others are often gone longer and don't make such a big deal about it 😛. regardless, though i may devote most of today to just reading around and catching up, I'M BAAAAAAAAAAACK! :silly:
go on. tell me how silly i am. or just welcome me back. whichever 😀. updates on ANYTHING that is BB-related that i cant find in the newsletter (people's new names for instance :silly🙂 is much appreciated 🙂.
*sigh* its a weight off my chest to have made this post and just to be back 🙂.
after seeing what she posted: holy crap! it did get huge! apologies.... :blush:
...and with a big, whopping smiley face she does so. some of you may have wondered where i have been for the past month or so. some of you may not care. some of you may not know me. to all of those i say, if you don't have any interest, do not bother reading further. this is part explanation, part personal-rant (sorry), and as some of you may know, i have a tendency to ramble on and write longer posts than i think i will half the time.
some of you still reading? okay, for those, here i go.
the long and short of it is that i have been (sadly) inactive on the boards for a small number of reasons. first and foremost, i am busy with life and work-like stuff in life. i always am. some of you may hear me constantly throw out that old excuse, "i'm really busy and i'm not sure i'll have time." then, 60% of the time, the next day you saw me doing whatever it was i claimed i could not do. so, apparently, im not a good judge of what makes me too busy. prime example: i was so busy i was gone for a month without warning. it got to the point where i couldn't find time to watch buffy, or do a lot of other things, even offline! it was frustrating, its a little better now.
second, i am dealing with some health problems now, of which i am still not sure of the whole story on, and of which i do not want to get into detail about. let me say this: it has not been fun. this was both painful and time consuming, and still goes on in part.
third, nanowrimo. for those of you who know what it is, you know how time consuming it can be. for those who dont, its basically this, quote, "competition" to write a 50,000 word novel in a month. not exactly giving with the extra time. either way, this is officially over now, and thus out of the picture side of editing stages.
finally, there was the fear, and here comes the less-explanation-more-personal-story-rant part. those who dont want to read the big long post, and just wanted the explanation, may avert their eyes now.
i have an issue with returning to the boards after i haven't. i realize that i may be a big dork in having this issue, but who knows? maybe im not alone. it was not so much of a worry the first couple of days, during which, again, i was sick and busy. but as time built up, everyday i planned to log on again, the dorky fear took hold of me. i thought "well, i've probably missed thousands upon thousands of posts by now! i'll never catch up!" and "how many events and in-jokes have i missed?" and "what should i tell people about where i was?" and "will i even be able to see any rep i've missed anymore?" 🙁 (come on; admit it! getting and reading your rep makes you feel good 😀). and of course, there's the most amusing one yet, which i hope will please you in its irony as much as it pleased me, "i submitted my huge 'why i come back to BB' response to the newsletter! how can i return when i haven't been back in days?!?!?!?" then days turned into a week, and a week into more weeks, and.....well, you get the picture.
i applaud those of you who are still reading. or maybe im more interesting than i thought 😛. anyway, today, i was just sitting at home, reading a book, when i was overcome with the desire to see if my response actually got in the BB newsletter. but, again with the fear, and i didn't want to log on. so....sneaky little me, i went on as a guest to check. just a quick skim. and in that quick skim, where pictures and avatars were invisible, people i didn't recognize posted in the feedback area, and i possibly recognize a name change (is Five By Five now Lindsey McDonald, or is my no-picture seeing self crazy?), i realized that i missed BB. i mean, i knew it already, but this was a fresh wave of it. after all, id been scared to even type the first three letters into my address bar for about a month!
still, i was not moved to log on again. i couldn't even bring myself to look at ANYTHING id missed beyond the newsletter (though my response did get into it :cheering🙂. too many posts! too many newbies! it was just too much. so i returned to my book. and thats when it hit me. i would call it an epiphany, but i think to elevate it to that level would demote any other epiphany in the world. but, call it what you wish, i had it. i began to think "you know, I miss BB. and i don't care about catching up! i mean, i keep saying i'll wait 'til i have more time to catch up, but by the time that actually HAPPENS, such a thing will be utterly impossible!" what i REALLY needed to do was just throw myself back into it. i know it will be weird. before i left, i checked so many posts as to leave "no new unread posts" each day. i will miss seeing that. i was considering joining irc chats and BBtv showings. i participated, or opted to participate, in a bunch of activities, and followed certain threads. it is doubtable that i will be able to catch up quickly to reading most of those threads in full, or get back to "no unread posts a day", but id rather deal with that and be back on the boards again! 🙂
bear in mind, i probably won't make many insightful or long posts anytime soon, especially in threads that require deep thought or lots of pages to read before the newest posts. but hey, if you haven't caught on by now, i sometimes go against what i say and post an elaborate post anyway. a more likely truth to bear in mind is that any irc or BBtv plans i had are on the back-burner now, and probably will be for a while. ......but you never know with me...........:whistle:
the way i see it, it's sort of like being a newbie again in someways. i was intimidated by the large boards when i first joined, and now it's like that again. HOWEVER, now i have advantages. i know a bunch of BBers, provided they haven't all disappeared like me too 🙂p), and i know the board rules and functions (except any that may have changed). that's nice, at least. and hey, in the grand scheme of things, i haven't been gone THAT long! others are often gone longer and don't make such a big deal about it 😛. regardless, though i may devote most of today to just reading around and catching up, I'M BAAAAAAAAAAACK! :silly:
go on. tell me how silly i am. or just welcome me back. whichever 😀. updates on ANYTHING that is BB-related that i cant find in the newsletter (people's new names for instance :silly🙂 is much appreciated 🙂.
*sigh* its a weight off my chest to have made this post and just to be back 🙂.
after seeing what she posted: holy crap! it did get huge! apologies.... :blush:
Nix
Huggles - welcome home Raidenette :)
Kemy
*huggles*
B
Blair Waldorf-Bass
*hugs*
palabravampiress
Welcome back, hun! I'm sorry you've had a rough time lately.
