Update Staff Decision

I can't even read through this stuff anymore. It's all either painful, or makes you angry and you get swept up in the nastiness of it all even if you don't intend to. So I have a maybe ridiculous request? Could I be temp-banned for a couple weeks? I know the temp ban can be done, and I feel like I'm only going to say something I'll regret (either through miswording something or just getting angered by something or someone in all of this craziness). I don't want to go so far as to say I want my account deleted, because there are tons of people here I'd miss but at this point I just want to stay out of this and I don't think I have the self-discipline to do so on my own. Perhaps in a couple of weeks, the shouting, the disagreements, and general unpleasantness that a lot of us fallen prey to will have subsided but until then....

love you all.
 
Mr. Pointy
Mr. Pointy
Just pretend you're on vacation for a couple of weeks :)
D
DrusillaRox
I will die without your usertitle (sw)
S
Selig
I'm with you on this one. Shame others can't be so mature!
E
Edmund Blackadder
Just read my posts only - in fact my favourite ever post on BB is in this very thread!
Buffy Summers
Buffy Summers
As long as there's not a riot about it later, sure ;)
Allright, I've got to step in on this one.

I had a minor discussion with BEG last night in the IRC, in which I was irritated about the outcome of things. Not just on YC's behalf - I think there are issues here that tie in to YC's banning and issues that need to be discussed with the staff and the members to find a good route the works for everyone, because I feel like it's become pretty apparent at this point that sweeping gestures on the part of the staff just anger people and cause more drama. Not that they should, but it happens.

We didn't make a "sweeping gesture". If we had made a sweeping gesture, I'd say approximately 10 more people would not be members of this board anymore.

Part of my irritation in the IRC last night was with the fact that while I think, for the most part, I maintained a calm and level head and tried to make my point in a calm manner, we had someone like Athena bitching and berating everyone for just not agreeing with her. After the fact, I sat back and looked at some of the things she said and realized I was baited into an argument that I should've had the good sense to stay out of, which is my bad entirely. And not only that, but she gets pats on the back for 'protecting her friend'

I don't see anywhere where the staff gave her any "pats on the back".

Someone like Athena is rude and obnoxious and no one on the staff did a thing about shutting her up while that mess was going on.

Actually, when I came back to the board and saw what had been posted, I contacted Athena and asked her to stop posting.

Buffy's friends get to do it, so why can't I?

On the other side of the coin there - everyone who wants to badmouth me acts like it's their right...

Mostly, I'm irritated because I felt like I was doing a good thing by airing these issues and putting them up for discussion but no one wanted to listen, and on top of that, no one cared.

I read through the entire thread, and I posted clarification about yellowcrayon's banning which is what I thought you were looking for?

I feel like the whole mindset of the board at this point is, "Shut up, don't cause problems, just side with Buffy and everything will be FINE." And while everyone has their own individual reasons for thinking so, and while a lot of those reasons have merit, I didn't think it was part of the plan here to sit down and shut up when I felt like there was something wrong with not only the way the board was being run, but the way the membership was acting on top of it. We all have issues here, not just the staff, and if I come off like I'm singling them out I don't mean to. But if I'm wrong in thinking that I shouldn't just sit down, shut up and deal with it then please let me know.

Is the issue you're having just that you disagree with yellowcrayon being banned? It's one thing to disagree, and quite another to continuously makes posts filled with hyperbole about how awful I am with no real substance (I'm not speaking of your posts here). No one has told you to shut up. The fact that this thread is even still open speaks to that fact. There are ways to disagree and ask questions that don't involve threats and harassment. But I will say: if you disagree about how the board is run, then you are free to leave.

It's a point of pride for me not to have left that thread when I did yesterday because I was being told to by some troll who's, as I look back on it now, sole purpose was to be rude and start shit with people.

Which was exactly Seraphim's purpose in being here. At least with Athena, for once the truth got to be posted.

Not because of simple pride, but because I believe strongly in the issues I was trying to raise and I wanted at least some kind of recognition as to the fact that they're being discussed or thought over.

Again, I made a post answering your concerns. I certainly didn't make the post for Seraphim, Mes.

And I didn't want to leave the board because of it, but I'm at the point now where I feel like these issues aren't going to get resolved in any way and there are still going to be problems here because of it, no matter whatever sweeping gesture on part of the staff comes next.

Again with the sweeping gesture. But we're of the same mind: I don't want to leave the board either but I'm at the point where I feel like these issues aren't going to get resolved.

This place either alternately pisses me off or depresses me everytime I come here now, and that in and of itself saddens me.

Me too.

It wasn't too long ago that I was happy to be here, happy to be in the IRC and posting and goofing off and having fun.

Me too.

... I don't think this place is going to get any better going in the direction we're going.

Me either.

People can hate me. And people can sit around in little groups and call me names and make everything I do into some evil plan. But I don't have to allow them to use my site while they do it.
 
S
Selig
You have my full support. I'm sorry if I did not make that clear!
I
InsaneMystic
agreement karma with a "see below" attached :)
Something to remind us of why we are here!

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyxljOhiN3E&feature=PlayList&p=64D4AFB9B265D717&index=0&playnext=1"]YouTube - OMWF - Overture / Going Through the Motions[/ame]
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zq0ucPNX_L8&feature=PlayList&p=64D4AFB9B265D717&index=1&playnext=2&playnext_from=PL"]YouTube - OMWF - I've Got a Theory / Bunnies / If We're Together[/ame]
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXAzNj4KVIQ&feature=PlayList&p=64D4AFB9B265D717&index=2&playnext=3&playnext_from=PL"]YouTube - OMWF - Under Your Spell[/ame]
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5-gKLKdCxk0&feature=PlayList&p=64D4AFB9B265D717&index=3&playnext=4&playnext_from=PL"]YouTube - OMWF - I'll Never Tell[/ame]
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xfGoXXbbrDw&feature=PlayList&p=64D4AFB9B265D717&index=4&playnext=5&playnext_from=PL"]YouTube - OMWF - Rest in Peace[/ame]
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lizBDiYe6bA&feature=PlayList&p=64D4AFB9B265D717&index=5&playnext=6&playnext_from=PL"]YouTube - OMWF - What You Feel[/ame]
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3C3pSQqLq1g&feature=PlayList&p=64D4AFB9B265D717&index=6&playnext=7&playnext_from=PL"]YouTube - OMWF - Standing[/ame]
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WhpB4t4wtQI&feature=PlayList&p=64D4AFB9B265D717&index=7&playnext=8&playnext_from=PL"]YouTube - OMWF - Under Your Spell / Standing à¢â‚¬" reprise[/ame]
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HUnlMW9eEmc&feature=PlayList&p=64D4AFB9B265D717&index=8"]YouTube - OMWF - Walk Through the Fire[/ame]
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mdDU8dWwUUY&feature=PlayList&p=64D4AFB9B265D717&index=9&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL"]YouTube - OMWF - Something to Sing About[/ame]
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jpt2-s91oCU&feature=PlayList&p=64D4AFB9B265D717&index=10&playnext=2&playnext_from=PL"]YouTube - OMWF - What You Feel à¢â‚¬" reprise[/ame]
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MfoZLwhp--M&feature=PlayList&p=64D4AFB9B265D717&index=11&playnext=3&playnext_from=PL"]YouTube - OMWF - Where Do We Go from Here?[/ame]
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YFLGiY736to&feature=PlayList&p=64D4AFB9B265D717&index=12&playnext=4&playnext_from=PL"]YouTube - OMWF - Coda[/ame]

And for a bit of extra fun

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zo5LAqjEU_w&NR=1"]YouTube - Amber Benson and Anthony Stewart Head singing[/ame]

---------- Post added at 12:30 AM ---------- Previous post was Yesterday at 11:33 PM ----------

Just spoke to Atticus and he told me to say this:

atticus said:
"I agree with everything Edmund 'Alister' Blackadder has said, he's a king amongst men"
 
Bluebird
Bluebird
[No message]
Tueuse de Vampires
Tueuse de Vampires
I was thinking the exact same thing!
Something i feel i need to say, i know we all love the buffyboards and there is a real sense of community here and thats great. BUT some people really need to just cool off and i guess just try and ignore it. I mean its the internet, all you need to do is switch off the pc and just live you real life for a bit. You'll feel good and when you come back, everything is already better.

Also theres trolling and arguing on any forum, some people need to stop being so dramatic and just deal with it.
 
C
crabby patty
[No message]
Ok, here's my two cents. When I got here last night the thread was closed, but I want to have my say since everyone else has gotten theirs....
I love this board. When I first came here I literally wouldn't stop talking about the board and its members and what an awesome place it was to my family and friends who like Buffy. But over the last few months it's not been much fun. I do not hate Buffy. I don't always agree with the decisions she makes on this board, but it's her board and I respect that. Anyone can come to this board and see that the staff works really hard on making it an awesome place for Buffy/Angel/Whedon-in-general fans, and I have to say it's the best forum I've ever been a member of. The organization of it all, and the variety of topics to choose from make it my favorite place to post. Well, it USED to make it that way. Recently all the drama on this board has made it so I've all but stopped posting anywhere except Art Class and Vahla Ha'Nesh; those are the only two places I feel relaxed and that I feel I can have fun in.
I am really really good friends with most of the folks who were banned. Out of all of them, there are 2 that I absolutely have no idea why anyone would see them as a troublemaker, and then there are 3 that I totally understand and won't contest. I have been called 2-faced because I try to stay on good terms with the staff but also maintain my friendships with these people, and if that makes me 2-faced then I guess I am. I'm not going to give up friendships, and I don't want that to cause problems between me and the staff, but if it does I will leave. I hope it doesn't come to that, because I've invested so much time in posting here that it would be a complete waste, but I will leave if it's going to continue like this.
The point of it is that this is Buffy's board and she has a right to ban anyone she sees fit. She is, as countless others have pointed out, the woman who pays the bills to keep this place up and running, so if she wants to she can ban everyone and not give a reason for it. However, it's just common courtesy to let someone know what they've done wrong if you choose to take that route. I understand she doesn't want to air it all publically, and really she shouldn't; it's no one's business but the staff's and the people who were banned.
If you don't agree with someone being banned or not, then that is fine. But don't come on this board and bash the mods because guess what? You might not know all the facts. But something else that really irks me? The staff on this site often uses stuff that happens outside of this board to condone actions against members, and that is WRONG. If it goes on outside this board, then it shouldn't be brought to attention here. Something that is said on Facebook or MySpace or an IRC channel other than [HASHTAG]#buffyboards[/HASHTAG] or even the phone should NOT be used against a member here. The otherside of that coin is that it's crappy to use venues such as these to do nothing but flame the staff or members here. And talking about stabbing someone over something that goes on in an online community is just extreme and uncalled for. Seriously... We all have lives, people. Let's not make the situation on these boards our whole life, ok?
I was among the banned back in May. At the time, I was hurt and pissed off and I mouthed off about the staff. But the reason I was mad was that I wasn't given a reason; I just tried to log on one day and couldn't. I later found out, after finally talking to Buffy through PMs, that it was over my "extreme" behavior in some threads about Twilight. Which is one reason I don't discuss that subject here anymore.
Another thing I want to address is that I was deeply upset by the fact that what was being said by Athena yesterday and her behavior was horrible and I didn't see any of these mods trying to stop her. I understand she wanted to defend her friend, just like Seraphim wanted to defend his wife, but it got out of hand and I didn't think it should have been allowed to continue. But again, this is Buffy's board, not mine. So she can run it any way she wants to. But I will say this... A LOT of people are talking about leaving this board. Not just the people who are close friends with the folks who were banned, either. Do we really want to run off the members because of all this?
I want to see if there is any possible way we can try to overcome this as a group. Without fighting, without name-calling or hateful attitudes. Let's be adults, please. If we have problems with someone with something that was said outside the board, that should be handled outside the board. This site should not be used to keep this drama going; it should be used exactly what it was intended for: to discuss the things we have in common and make us come together, not the things that tear us apart.
I don't think I said that as well as I wanted to, but anyway... This is how I feel.
 
November
November
Totally Agree
Dayum. I receive birthday greetings (thanks for that), and come looking for the Buffy Boards, and get this?

I've seen so many forums implode, and disgruntled posters form new boards, while moderators circle the wagons and put their fingers in their ears. Everyone's a little wrong sometimes, and reading emotions accurately is the hardest thing about message boards. At the end of the day, though, you make the rules, and you apply them to everyone equally, openly.

Meantime, who gets the award for their eerily lifelike portrayal of 'Chris Crocker on steroids'..?

The disputes about moderation aside, the boards are looking quite vibrant. When Season 7 of 'Buffy' ended, and 'Angel' not long after, I wasn't bereft. There was still 'Stargate SG-1', which had it's own special flavour, and then 'A Town Called Eureka'. We're heading into a lean time for Sci-Fi/fantasy' TV, with many cancellations, but it's cool that these boards are still a success. Now, if we can keep in mind why that is...
 
BuffyElevated
BuffyElevated
[No message]
L
Lou
Happy birthday!
/me comes back in to hug Flannen.

I can't speak for everyone, but I don't see any reason for backlash. You, obviously, saw something you found upsetting or concerning to you, and you have every right to your opinion and what you choose to do about it. And it doesn't appear that anyone either feels that you should have ignored something that you felt was wrong, or if they do, they are smart enough to not say so.

I have little issue with the intentions behind what everyone has done on any side. Buffy is right to try and protect her staff and members. Flannen (and/or all others) have a right to bring things to attention that they think is questionable, iffy, or outright wrong. Seraphim has a right to try to defend his wife when he thinks there is a wrong. Athena has a right to defend her friend from an injustice she sees. Other people have defended their friends from what they saw as an injustice. I firmly believe, that YellowCrayon thought she was helping quash the drama and keep the other thread about Lyri and Kean leaving as just that. And, I don't think Lyri and Kean leaving was an attempt to drive the boards to more impending drama and fighting, leading to the eventual demise of the boards they love. So, all around, people have good intentions in one way or another.


The problem is, that as humans, we judge others by their actions, and hope others judge us by our intentions.


What we seem to have on all sides, is people reacting to reactions. Someone does something, someone else gets mad, their friends hear about it, they get mad, they react, their reaction upsets other people, they get mad, their friends get mad, they react. And at this rate, we'll have a world of angry people and no members anyplace.

At the moment we have a thread 3 miles long filled with bullying, hateful comments about how we got rid of the bullies to make it a better place....terrifying newbies, and scaring the heck out of members who aren't here as often, and ruffling the feathers of almost every member in some way or another.

Granted, I can't do much of anything about anything other than apparently watch the people I care about hurt each others feelings back and forth and wave as others flee in the situation all together. (I fear the quietest people on both sides are the ones hurting the most.)
But, I can do ONE thing. Perhaps it will get me banned, and I will say that is okay and I understand, but my statement will still stand, regardless. I will step up as head of this aforementioned "clique", as I doubt it comes to much surprise to anyone. I'm not fond of it being referred to as such, as it seems to ME to be just a group of people who like each other, love the boards and move like mad to see the sorting tome and welcome newbies. But, I can believe that at some point, someone has felt "on the outside looking in" or daunted by a group of people who seem to know each other so well when they don't.
I can state that, Flannen, you are always welcome to come and chat. You may not want to rush and speak to everyone, and I understand that. But, I will make it my personal mission to see that you aren't thrown under the bus for doing what you thought was right or receive any backlash for publicly stating how you felt. And if you feel bullied, please let me know. The same with anyone else who feels the same way Flannen does. I'm all for people not agreeing with everyone all the time and people having opinions that don't mesh with everyone's.

But, I would really like for all the anger to end. We've all said or done things we're not proud of later or looked back and said, "Well, I still think I did the right thing, but maybe I could have handled it better." (with the possible exception of EB who has never done anything wrong) so, perhaps, we should just all look at who we're upset with and say, "Well, maybe I think they could have handled this better, but there's no point in trying to remedy that by doing something I could have handled better."

Just my random rambling thoughts again. It happens. But, I do miss my boards.
 
E
Edmund Blackadder
Fair enough - just came across as 'well EB never does anything wrong' when we ALL know I can be a jackass sometimes!
Washburne
Washburne
Some good points.
Bluebird
Bluebird
[No message]
(with the possible exception of EB who has never done anything wrong) .

I don't know what that means but in the middle of that spiel it comes across as rather bitchy and can I just say 'ouch'.

In this whole thread, I think I have been one of the few that has kept my comments even and fair, not choosing a side while not holding back what I believe and even injecting humour into a very tense conversation.

If it wasn't meant as a sarcastic or negative comment, forgive me but read in the context it comes across as a little bit 'grrr' - which shocks me considering a couple of hours ago you wanted to hug me!
 
L
Lou
Aw! It wasn't meant to be bitchy. I'm sorry.
VisionGuy
VisionGuy
HA! That's witty. ;p
Thank you for your post HisMrs.

I would like to address one thing you said, to give my reasoning as it pertains to this case.

The staff on this site often uses stuff that happens outside of this board to condone actions against members, and that is WRONG. If it goes on outside this board, then it shouldn't be brought to attention here. Something that is said on Facebook or MySpace or an IRC channel other than #buffyboards or even the phone should NOT be used against a member here.

I am going to object to the use of the word "often" - as this is the only time we have used something that happened off the board as cause for punishment (other than stealing from the board).

The comments made recently on Facebook were not the first ones, and not even the first ones by those involved. I too took the stance that "It didn't happen on the board, so I can't punish them for it." And you know what? You're right, it shouldn't matter what people say off the site. It shouldn't affect us at all. And it hasn't affected us for years and years.

But when it gets to a point where it is affecting the board itself, and causing staff members to leave - when it's causing a rift in the community - then enough is enough.

Now I know people on this board that HAAAATE me. But they still are able to post on this board without it being a problem and without causing a war. Because guess what? You and I don't generally ever have to interact as long as you follow the board rules. And even then. For 99.9999% of the times people have broken board rules, what happens? A mod pm's the member, telling them they've broken a rule, and asking them not to do it again. End of story. There's no punishment. They don't even need to reply most of the time. And if they do, all the mod is looking for is, "Sorry, it won't happen again." But time and time again, the mod gets back an incredulous response full of threats and name calling. And all because we moved your thread or edited out the word "cocksucker" from your post, or deleted where you said you were currently high on drugs! And suddenly, the staff are evil monsters who deserve to be vilified at every opportunity. We're "Stalin" or "Nazis" and this is the "Gulag".

From my perspective, at the point where the boards have become downright unpleasant, I have to ask myself, Why should I let people enjoy the board and participate in the activities the mods work hard on, if they are going to then go onto Facebook (or an open chat room) and call me a "c*nt"? Or call Lindsey an asshole or make graphic comments about Lyri?

No, you don't have to like us. And yes, you can talk to your friends about it. BUT when it comes to this on the board don't expect us to just turn a blind eye anymore.

AND I'd just like to say, for the record, that it's not like the staff goes around reading people's Facebook pages to see if there's anything juicy in them. I don't even have time to read my own Facebook. The comments the staff have seen time and time again came from Buffy Boards' own Facebook page. So if people didn't want the staff to see those comments, they shouldn't make them where they will be posted for them all to see. Especially when it happens to be part of the mods' job to look after the Board Facebook page, and thus they have to go on there and look at it.

And let us not forget, that this incident on Facebook was one incident, not the only incident that led to Kean and Lyri leaving or members being banned. It was just the straw that broke the camels back. Initially, these members were not banned for the comments, only infracted. But because of the public outcry asking for the people responsible for Lyri and Kean's exit to be banned, we felt that we needed to begin a review process. And it was only the prevalence of other incidents on the board itself that led us to decide that those members needed to be banned.
 
E
Edmund Blackadder
People write that Lindsey is an asshole - he's from scotland isn't he, surely it should be arsehole! I swear to god I am teasing - and fully expect this rep to be deleted:)
C
charmingslayer
People actually call Lindsey an "asshole" wow he's never even done anything remotley wrong.
U
untouched
[No message]
Bluebird
Bluebird
[No message]
I have thought long and hard, and discussed with friends on and off the Board, about whether or not to go ahead and do what I'm about to do.

I have just read through this entire thread to make sure that I post on this having read through what everyone has to say. My main issue with some of the posts in this thread were things like this:



This is honestly what I found to be the most infuriating type of comment on here. It is a real discredit to the members who have felt mistreated by YC, or for those who have questioned her behaviour. These sorts of comments must make those members feel absolutely awful, but no consideration has been given to them. If they have genuinely felt this way, how do you think they feel now? Questioning themselves, worrying that maybe they misread the situation or they were wrong and they've lead to someone being banned? And maybe it's not surprising that comments like this have been made when those members haven't felt comfortable stepping forward in this thread, and hell, who can blame them?

Well here you are: I am one member who had issues with YC's behaviour. As I said, I have debated at great length whether to do this, taking the backlash I might receive into consideration, but I've decided that it's about time someone stepped up, supported the staff and made it clear they didn't just ban the 'ones they don't like' and showed that not everyone thinks this banning was unjustified. You wanted the anonymity to be lifted and I'm doing just that. I don't think I am the only member who did say something about it, I don't think highly enough of myself to think that my concerns alone would result in the banning of another member.

I used to spend time in the IRC channel that has caused some concern. A few nights ago, I left very quietly and will not be going back any time soon. I found myself getting increasingly angry at what was being said and the outright refusal by some people to even try and understand this situation from the staff's point of view. Every post made by the staff was instantly read in the most negative way possible, to the point that without unleashing the hell-beast within me, I could no longer read, so I left.

I felt, that because the other side of the coin was being argued with constantly, with some absolutely ludicrous excuses, what was going on in that channel, on behalf of some of the members, including YC, was to encourage the members to boycott the staff. My feelings at the time, which I did express, and still uphold, is why don't you just leave? If you are that unhappy, delete your account, because there was just no point. The members as a whole, or individually are NOT bigger than the Boards themselves, no matter what some people may think; and this was the impression I was getting. Which, quite frankly, infuriated me. I was fed up with the hypocrisy of the whole thing, people complaining about drama and then going ahead and creating more, and now after reading through this thread and all the crap and questions that is been thrown at the staff, just because some people want to know who might have addressed the staff and they, rightly, have maintained anonymity, I going to try and give a bit of perspective.

Please don't misunderstand me, and think that I am referring to everyone in that channel. Those of you that know me, know that I do my utmost not to be misunderstood and I would hate for this to be the case now. And I'd also like to add that I was friendly with YC, and I didn't particularly want to feel the way I did, but I did and I addressed it in the way I felt necessary for the good of the Board because I love this place and I want it to be as fun and friendly as it can.

I'm sorry if I have shocked/upset anyone with this post, but I don't think I could have continued to see the staff being attacked for their decision, when there was something I could do to help clarify.

I appreciate your bravery. I know that must have been difficult.

Thank you for your post HisMrs.

I would like to address one thing you said, to give my reasoning as it pertains to this case.



I am going to object to the use of the word "often" - as this is the only time we have used something that happened off the board as cause for punishment (other than stealing from the board).

The comments made recently on Facebook were not the first ones, and not even the first ones by those involved. I too took the stance that "It didn't happen on the board, so I can't punish them for it." And you know what? You're right, it shouldn't matter what people say off the site. It shouldn't affect us at all. And it hasn't affected us for years and years.

But when it gets to a point where it is affecting the board itself, and causing staff members to leave - when it's causing a rift in the community - then enough is enough.

Now I know people on this board that HAAAATE me. But they still are able to post on this board without it being a problem and without causing a war. Because guess what? You and I don't generally ever have to interact as long as you follow the board rules. And even then. For 99.9999% of the times people have broken board rules, what happens? A mod pm's the member, telling them they've broken a rule, and asking them not to do it again. End of story. There's no punishment. They don't even need to reply most of the time. And if they do, all the mod is looking for is, "Sorry, it won't happen again." But time and time again, the mod gets back an incredulous response full of threats and name calling. And all because we moved your thread or edited out the word "cocksucker" from your post, or deleted where you said you were currently high on drugs! And suddenly, the staff are evil monsters who deserve to be vilified at every opportunity. We're "Stalin" or "Nazis" and this is the "Gulag".

From my perspective, at the point where the boards have become downright unpleasant, I have to ask myself, Why should I let people enjoy the board and participate in the activities the mods work hard on, if they are going to then go onto Facebook (or an open chat room) and call me a "c*nt"? Or call Lindsey an asshole or make graphic comments about Lyri?

No, you don't have to like us. And yes, you can talk to your friends about it. BUT when it comes to this on the board don't expect us to just turn a blind eye anymore.

AND I'd just like to say, for the record, that it's not like the staff goes around reading people's Facebook pages to see if there's anything juicy in them. I don't even have time to read my own Facebook. The comments the staff have seen time and time again came from Buffy Boards' own Facebook page. So if people didn't want the staff to see those comments, they shouldn't make them where they will be posted for them all to see. Especially when it happens to be part of the mods' job to look after the Board Facebook page, and thus they have to go on there and look at it.

And let us not forget, that this incident on Facebook was one incident, not the only incident that led to Kean and Lyri leaving or members being banned. It was just the straw that broke the camels back. Initially, these members were not banned for the comments, only infracted. But because of the public outcry asking for the people responsible for Lyri and Kean's exit to be banned, we felt that we needed to begin a review process. And it was only the prevalence of other incidents on the board itself that led us to decide that those members needed to be banned.

I COMPLETELY agree. I was gonna comment on that but you said it better than I could have. (sw)

And I for one don't appreciate it when members here who I thought I was in good terms with, go around calling me names behind my back. That is very immature. If you have something to say about me, I would expect it to be said to my face.
 
E
Edmund Blackadder
To be fair, retarded chimpanzees could write it better than you could! Also I am just letting you know, I will always call you names to your face [avatar]
I don't know if this is off topic or not because I have no idea what it is, but what is IRC?
 
However, it's just common courtesy to let someone know what they've done wrong if you choose to take that route. I understand she doesn't want to air it all publically, and really she shouldn't; it's no one's business but the staff's and the people who were banned.

There's a difference between knowing what you've done and knowing who has said these things. Seraphim was pushing heavily on the second issue. And YC was told what she did wrong but it wasn't detailed enough to give them satisfaction about it. Which I can understand. Which one of us wouldn't want to know more? It's a slippery slope for sure. On one hand you (as mod/admin) need to protect the members that stepped forward and on the other hand you have the accused wanting answers. And you need to make a decision because no matter what you do someone won't get their wish. And personally I'm on the side of protecting members. Yes that could of course mean that a bunch of people could conspiracy together and send in loads of complaints about certain members in hope to get them banned. But do anyone think that was the case here? And I doubt the admins/mods just go "Ok, we now have some complaints about a certain member lets ban them just for fun without looking into it." It may not look like it to you, but if you think they do things out of fun we have a big trust issue on our hands. Not liking all the decisions being made is one thing. Thinking they're done just for the fun of it or without thinking about it first is something comlpetely different.

But back to the "I want to know what I did" problem. Is the reason given to you too vague? It's easy to say that "member A think this, member B feels this way by what you did/said and so on". Still sounds like anonymity right? But these things are easier to backtrack if you want to than you think. I'm not saying that all people are that "evil" that they would do that or that they or their friends would take what ever action because of it. But for some reason people wanted to stay anynomous and I understand that. Speaking up against friends or a big influential group isn't easy if anyone think that. Which is why I think what Flannen did was very brave. And lets not kid ourselves. Being a mod or being on the mods side (it felt like just saying one small thing to even suggest that the mods could be doing something right could make some people go through the roof) in the last couple of months haven't really helped with peoples relationships. So that people can be afraid to lose that is understandable. Don't you think? I'm not saying that one side or the other is totally to blame. It's the situation. I know a few people that don't want to speak up about what they really think because of fear of losing friends. Sadly that's just how it's been.

a group of people who like each other, love the boards and move like mad to see the sorting tome and welcome newbies.
I could have sworn that you're talking about VH. 😉
 
Actually, when I came back to the board and saw what had been posted, I contacted Athena and asked her to stop posting.
That, in itself, shows that anyone who thinks you suck as a mod has no idea what they're talking about. :cheering:

Last comment I make on this topic:
I guess you remember I was among those who sharply criticized the TimeOut, even hough I wasn't among the tempbanned (and I still think about it the same way as I did back then). However, had the TO been handled more like this here was, you'd never have had heard a single word of criticism from me. In other words: Well done. 🙂
 
I should have made clear my support for Buffy Summers in this matter, but my reluctance to get involved in internecine warfare took hold.

I was, and am I hope, friends with at least two of those banned and also consider myself an online friend of Buffy Summers of some years standing.

Buffy Summers was correct to ban those that she saw as harmful to the well-being of this site.

She has owned and run this place for over 7 years now and run it bloody well, or it would never have lasted this long. I think the major problem is how well it has been run. People consider this their community and get upset when things don't go their way. It is not ours!

Ultimately we don't own these boards, Buffy Summers does, and she spends her time and her money doing so. Anyone who has ever privately spoken to Buffy Summers has had nothing but praise for her. I have spoken to her many times over the years and she has never been anything but kind and supportive.

I'm sorry that it's taken me this long to give her my unequivocal support.
 
C
captain peroxide
RIGHT THERE WITH YOU BRO
F
Fusions2
Well said, I like your style of thinking on this situation.
Mazikeen
Mazikeen
[No message]
I'm sorry to post again now that the thread has almost died. But yellowcrayon asked me to post something for her. This isn't me taking a stand one way or another. It's up to each and everyone to decide how to take it. I got asked, got the permission by the staff to post it. That's all. So here it is. Nothing's been edited. You can always ask yc yourself if you doubt that.

yellowcrayon said:
I want to apologize to whomever has complained about me. I have never intended to abuse, hurt, offend, or bully anyone. If I have said or done anything that has been taken in that way, I am truly and deeply sorry.

I'm not asking anyone to tell me who you are. I don't care. I just want to somehow make things right with you, and all I ask is that you, even if you don't accept it, at least acknowledge my apology. If there is anything I can do to make things right with anyone, I would love to know so I can do it.

All I want is for people to be happy. It hurts loads that there are folks unhappy, and I want to fix it, as best I can.

As for Flannen, I am not angry with you. I am sorry that you misunderstood my actions and my motivation. It was never my intent to "boycott the mods." I apologize for my lack of clarity, and for anything I might have done to make you feel unwelcome.
 
BuffyElevated
BuffyElevated
I'm glad you were allowed to post this... Now it feels like at least YC got her final word, you know?
I have to agree with everything Edmund Blackadder said! The man is a genius, enough said.

And honestly people I would just like to say it's done. It doesn't matter what side of the fence you sit on because ultimately if you're not one of the mods then it's not your decision to make.
 
good god that was a long read and after reading through most of it ( i don't have the ability nor the patience to read it all) i think Buffy did what she had to do. I can remember when I first joined and this was one of if not THE best place on the internet to talk about my favorite show and first love Buffy. What happened to that? I understand different opinions when it comes to the show and what not but I mean seriously can't it be a place where people of a similar background meet to discuss something that makes us all happy? I don't think there is one person on this board that can honestly say they hate buffy or any of the charecters/actors that have played in Buffy. I think you need to check the drama at the sign in box. When you come here come to talk about Buffy/Angel/Firefly whatever but leave your personal crap outside.

Buffy and all the mods I thank you for doing an amazing job making my experience on the BB one of my favorite things to do. It has let me know that I am not alone in this world knowing that there are other Whedon Freaks out there like me even though their not remotely close to where I live, they are only a mouse click away. Keep up the good job staff.

Appreciation and much love

Spuffy is true love.
 
I don't want to diminish the seriousness of whatever exactly this situation is, that lead to a whole bunch of bans, I'm just saying, sucks to have missed the whole thing. A good bit of drama is entertaining, granted, internet drama tends to lean on the lame side of the spectrum.

I've only read/skimmed the first three pages, if I read the whole topic will I be informed on what the whole situation is?(if not, some kind soul hit me up with a (pm)synopsis of the whole shebang)
 
S
Silum
to be fair, the fist page is all you need. The rest isn't remotely worth reading ;)
E
Edmund Blackadder
Don't listen to Silum - some of my posts are classics!
H
Harley
Welcome back - sometimes I think you've died
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