Of my friend, I am the Queen of Akward Moments.
There was that time I barfed on my headmaster while he was doing a speech in front of the whole school.
Or that time a woman at school kept calling me "Marion! YOUR DRESS!" "WHAAAAAAT?" "YOUR DREEEEEESS!" "WHAT ABOUT IT?" "IT IS UUUUUP!" "IT IS WHAAAAAAAT?" "UUUUUUP!" "WHAAAAAT?". Then a nice girl put my dress back where it should be. Down. Because my dress had completely gone up because of my bag.
Or that time the teachers and the whole class couldn't stop laughing while I was trying to talk seriously because I was speaking extremelly fast because there was not much time left and the teachers said "Don't forget to breathe when you talk" and I answered, without thinking "Oh no it's okay, I don't need to breathe". Awkward silence. Everybody laughing. I totally epicfacepalmed myself.
Or that time I was making a presentation on Berlin's Wall and I said Merlin's Wall instead and then accidentally hit the board and started having a nervous laugh (which lasted for about 5 minutes. In front of the class).
Or that time I said to a friend's dad (the first time I met him): "How come you daughter doesn't tell you that you sniff when she tells me all the time?". The dad gave me a weird look before laughing. Then I barfed in their family car. Three times. They like me now. They call me "the sassy girl who told your dad he sniffs and who barfed three times in the car".
Or that awkward time you are a waitress and acidentally spill two glasses of orange juice on a client.
Let's not forget that awkward moment when you are at the cafeteriat in the morning, and when you get up before you go to class, the table just falls, making a huge "BOUM". With the guy you like sending you a text: "That was a discrete way to leave."
Or the time you are so tired that you just fall in a three-marches stair, because you forgot there were marches (again in front of the guy you like)
Or that awkward moment someone's cellphone rings in class and the teacher ask you "Was that you?" because you have a guilty face and you say "Oh no, it's not me, I don't have any friend so I doubt my cellphone would ring". And that then the teacher asks you three times if you're sure you don't want his number to be his friend.
Or that moment you have a question and accidentally hit your neighbours'head with a pen when you raise your hand and end up laughing like a crazy for ten minutes, and you laugh so much your eyes cry and people think you are drunk.
Or when the English teacher asks you to read but you have difficulties because you're tired so the teacher asks "Are you drunk or are you always like that?" and the class answers "Oh, she's always like that!".
There's so many more awkward moments in my life, but I'll stop there. I'd say the good thing is that I may be awkward, but at least I made people laugh...of me. Oh boy 😀.
