Update (How Do I Deal With This 2)

*tries not to bang head on desk and scream really loud*

I'm going to tie her to a chair somewhere, I swear to god. After everything that happened on Friday, she sees him in the hallway and they make up. If they got back together, she wont give a statement to anyone, so we'll back where we were a week ago. URGH! *sigh*
 
Hey Hero,

I think you've done all that you can for now. It's like the saying, "you can take a horse to water, but you can't make it drink". If she won't accept the problem, there's nothing you can do about it. It's frustrating as hell, but that's it. She knows you're there but if she continues to associate with this individual, then she's going to learn the hard way, if she ever learns at all.
 
I agree. There is only so much you can do for a person that is in denial. At least she knows that she has someone who will be there for her when she finally makes the right choice. I'm sorry you have to be all stuck in the middle of this, hun. 🙁
 
I hear your pain, mon frere...just remember, YOU need to chill, and not get yourself in trouble...either with the cops or at school. Unless you are DIRECTLY protcting her from harm when he's hurting her, keep your hands off the sleazeball. If she won't prosecute him, she probably won't bail you out either, so if you do go at the guy, do it with witnesses, and make sure he' s actually a threat at that moment you intervene. I really hope she doesn't end up like my ex...but I won't hold my breath. Keenangelus and Jacklyn are right...you can't save someone who doesn't wnat to be saved...take care, buddy!
 
I hear what you're saying, but it's like Faith and Angel. Angel kept trying to help Faith even when she was killing people. She's my sister, I can't just give up on her.

Today I told her I wasn't helping her anymore because whenever we take 10 steps forward, the next day she takes 5 steps down. Then she started to cry, probably because I'm the only one that can help her, which forced me into this speech about how much i love her (as a sister) and all that nice stuff and then ended it with "but I'm not going to sit back and watch you destroy yourself anymore". Then she got really angry and said some things I can't post here, lol, but then later she came back and said she wanted to file a restraining order. *sigh* we'll see how long she actually wants to do that.
 
I hope she goes through with it. It seems that she was only doing that because you provoked her. Keep at her... maybe she'll just carry on.

My sister is with this guy who she has a child to, and another on the way. She keeps saying that she wants to leave him cos she doesn't love him any more. They were gonna get married but she told him she didn't love him. About half a year ago she left him and she was doing fine. Then he started worming her way back into her life. She got back with him, and now she pregnant again. Everytime I go to see her she gets that little bit of courage and decides she's gonna leave him again. But because i live in a different country from her, i can only see her for a couple of weeks at a time. As soon as i leave, she loses her nerve. She's not in the sitch as your sis, but it's kinda the same.

What I'm trying to say is that, if you keep at her to do something about that restraining order, she might actually have the courage to do it!
 
I hope your sister leaves her boyfriend if she's unhappy with him. Not that I want her to feel bad or anything. It's just that relationships like that are bad. not that she's bad for being in the relationship...uh...yeah...im gunna stop now lol

I think I got somewhere with her. I know I got somewhere with the whole gym. It got all quiet in the gym when we started yelling because everyone started to listen. She gave me permission to yell at him if he starts trying anything with her, so that's good because if she doesn't stand up for herself, I can do it for her. She told her boyfriend that I was getting involved, and he didn't do anything at all. The last five minutes of class he started saying stuff that got her upset, like he wanted to go have sex and something else I didn't hear him say, but she told him she wasn't getting into it again with him. So, maybe I am the reason for her standing up for herself. I hope he doesn't knock me off or something, he was staring at me all during class lol.
 
Yeah, I think you did get there if she's giving you the permition to stick up for her. It shows that she needs you and that deep down she wants to get this over with. She's gonna need all the help she can get. They say that "wolves hunt in packs"... well she needs a group of people behind her so that she's got someone to fall back on. It's gonna be difficult for her but she'll find her strength in numbers! Know what I mean?
 
Well, can I be the leader of the pack? or does she? It's going to be a two wolf pack because no one in our grade is mature enough to deal with the subject yet. everyone else thinks it's funny and likes to watch them go at each other. luckily, she won't see him at all this week because we have testing. the only way she'll see him is if she goes somewhere with him on her own.
 
You just have to try and make sure she doesn't do that. Is she scared of him? cos if she is then I don't think you'll have a problem with her going off on her own with him! Cos that's when he'll have the chance to worm his way back in... or force himself on her... whichever suits him best. Just be her bodyguard... as much as you can.
 
Yeah, she's really afraid of him. That's the problem and that's why she keeps giving into whatever he tells her. Although he didn't do anything yesterday because he knew that I was there, and I'm sure Stephanie would sock him if he did anything. So maybe your wolf metaphor was right.
 
Well, maybe it was... it sounds like you are sticking by her as much as possible. Just keep at it. Something is bound to go right! But the rest of your grade must be really immature if they can just sit back and enjoy the show! Can I ask how old you guys are?
 
We're freshmen. I'm 16-years-old (and so is my sister) because we both started school late. Everyone else in our grade is in the 14-15 range. And yeah, 60% of our grade has the maturity of a fish.
 
It's now day three since she stopped everything with him. I'm very proud of her. I'm not to sure if she wants to do a restraining order anymore, but she seems to be pushing him away enough. She told me that he's being sexually active with some other girl, so I don't understand why he'd still obsess over her. Anyway, yesterday before school I went to her locker and we started talking. She said that hated Dwane, but she still loved Anthony. I asked her what she meant and she said "Anthony is the guy I feel in love with, and Dwane is the guy he is now. I'm not in love with Dwane, I'm in love with Anthony, so I don't want Dwane around me anymore" I hope you guys get what she means by that, LoL. She also told me that it was his birthday and that she didn't waste her money buying everything. Instead, she proceeded to take a bag of cookies (which she baked herself) and gave them to me and hugged me and said "thank you" before walking away. 🙂 Maybe everything will brighten up very soon.
 
Wow... that's really sweet. I get what she means! He's not the same guy she fell in love with right? I'm glad she didn't get anything for his birthday... and it's good that she got you something instead. She's showing her appreciation for you being around to help. That means she wants to be helped... I'm so glad... it seems to have brightened up already! 🙂 Good for you!
 
Things are looking up! That's good, because this little situation has been a small twinge in the back of my mind since last week...I do have a life, but when things get quiet those twinges will be a bit more noticeable...I think your sis realizes who really cares in this picture, and it's not psycho-boy. I'm gonna alter a popular saying around here to say, "Life is too short to date psychos." I hope she adopts this as a motto...and adds "...and cheaters" to the list. Ya done good, H!
 
elmo - that's what she meant. I ate all the cookies though. There's none left now 🙁

killerdwarf - the situation has been bothering you? LoL. Well, atleast you can rest easy now, as can I...and her ob course.
 
Hero said:
killerdwarf - the situation has been bothering you?
Click to expand...

Not bothering me so much as making me uneasy...too many people cave in to freakazoids like your sis's stalker, and either let them get away with it or get themselves into trouble...I was concerned that you would do something to psycho-boy and get into trouble...as if being 16 isn't trouble enough! I'm relieved that the situation is resolving itself...maybe now the learning not to do it again can start for her...this kinda stuff gives guys a bad rap...and 99% of us don't deserve it!
 
Hero,

I'm really glad to hear that the situation is starting to look brighter. And that she has you beside her, watching her back. Support is what she needs right now. I get the Dwane, Anthony thing, it makes sense to me. But she'll be so much happier keeping well away from him whether he's being Dwane or Anthony. He needs some serious help.

Hope everything keeps improving for you both. 🙂
 
Keenangelus - she's stay away from him much more now. she doesn't call him, she doesn't walk with him in school, they don't walk home together anymore. She gave me this weird analogy that "Anthony was an egg and one day someone stepped on him and spit on him and be became Dwane" Atleast she's joking about it. Although it's a serious matter, sometimes laughter can help.

killerdwarf - you think im violent 🙁!!! LoL. No, I understand what you mean. Well, the top half of your post I understand. What do you mean by "and 99% of us dont deserve it"? What's that in reference too? The bad rap?
 
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