Wanting to be a different person

[tjkphilosopher]

Was it always in the cards or her destiny for Willow to go over the edge. How could her friends, Tara, and Giles have prevented it from happening. Did they missed an opportunity earlier.

It was obvious forcing Willow to go cold turkey was the wrong approach. Also Giles and Tara only telling Willow that its wrong to use magic all the time was wrong. Of course Willow will get defensive. Giles should have either taken her to England to understand the nature of magic or counsel her instead of preaching.

When has going completely without ever done any good. Just makes the cravings that much more intense. However Willow involvement in magic not really the same as being addicted to drugs or smoking. It is more than that.

Willow didn't want to be a wall flower or a computer geek. I relate so much to how Willow was in high school. If had the chance there much would change.

 

[Jonut]

I think ultamitely as with addiction the responsiblity lies predominately with Willow. Tara and Giles voiced concerns and offered help to Willow who was falling more and more each day. She chose not to believe she had a problem at first, and before she realised there was a problem, there isn't a lot the people around her could have done to help her.

I think tara had the right idea to begin with, she cut herself off from Willow and walked away no matter how hard it was for her for Willows own good and Willow did change, she stopped, she was doing much better when they got back together. When she lost Tara for good, she had nothing to stay off magic for, she had lost the love of her life and no amount of quitting could bring her back, but magic could help her seek revenge, so she fell off the wagon.

I guess it is the reason that consellors think that addicts should not get romantically involved with anyone during their recovery period because if they rely on people without being strong within themselves they can easily fold and revert to addiction and this is what happened to Willow, she fell because she lost everything that meant anything to her. No matter how much help Giles or the gang could have offered, she always would have reacted to that as she had not become strong enough on her own yet.

 

[tjkphilosopher]

Who she didn't want to be

That is probably true Willow and Tara shouldn't have gotten back together so soon. Instead of calling out for help after Tara was shot she calls upon osirus. Why did she think the spell that brought the slayer back would work on a mortal.

She wanted so much to get back what lost and thought had gotten her dependence on magic under control. However she still hadn't figured out how to control her emotions during a spell, or knowing the right spell for the right time.

Tara was helpful with the focus and control. Why wasn't she as helpful swaying Willow away from the dark magic.

Willow getting more and more involved with stronger magic has more to do with distanting herself from the person she didn't want to be.

 

[Kimm]

Well I'm not sure if I understand exactly what you're saying but the slayer is a mortal.

I'm not sure if I agree with the idea that Willow fell into dark magic to get away from the person she used to be. I think that power can be addictive and difficult to control....and the more power she felt she had, the more she wanted and it just spun out of control from there...I really don't think it had anything to do with her running away from her former self.

 

[Lyri]

i admit that quitting something cold turkey doesn't work for everyone...but it seemed to be working for willow up until the point where tara was killed.
when she wasn't with tara, willow had something to focus on...if she can quit magic and stay clean, tara might come back to her. this is what kept her going. i admit that this probably isn't the best motivation for quitting an addiction, but it was working for willow.
when tara was killed, there was no motivation...tara was gone and would never be coming back, whether she quit magic or not. this was probably the reason she fell off the wagon...she had nothing to focus on.

and yes, the slayer was/is mortal...but buffy was dies a supernatural death, which is why Osiris could bring her back. i think that, because tara was shot, maybe willow didn't class this is a 'natural death' and thought that osiris could help.
being shot is not a 'natural death' but it is a 'human death.' there was no supernatural activity involved. which is why osiris couldn't bring tara back.

 

[SpikedBuffy]

i admit that quitting something cold turkey doesn't work for everyone...but it seemed to be working for willow up until the point where tara was killed.
when she wasn't with tara, willow had something to focus on...if she can quit magic and stay clean, tara might come back to her. this is what kept her going. i admit that this probably isn't the best motivation for quitting an addiction, but it was working for willow.
when tara was killed, there was no motivation...tara was gone and would never be coming back, whether she quit magic or not. this was probably the reason she fell off the wagon...she had nothing to focus on.

absolutely

Willow was doing great on stopping her magic use. She was even feeling guilty when she was given the magic gift by Amy, which I consider a big step. Having the hope that one day she could kick the habit and maybe get Tara back was enough. And I think she realized that she was only getting tidbits of Tara back in her life because she had stopped using magic.

Yet, when it all came crumblind down, and Tara was gone, what inspiration did Willow have?

I don't think she used magic to get away from her 'geeky' stage in early high school. I think the magic helped her be more sure of her self, but I don't think it was an escape.

 

[Edmund Blackadder]

Was it always in the cards or her destiny for Willow to go over the edge. How could her friends, Tara, and Giles have prevented it from happening. Did they missed an opportunity earlier.

It was obvious forcing Willow to go cold turkey was the wrong approach. Also Giles and Tara only telling Willow that its wrong to use magic all the time was wrong. Of course Willow will get defensive. Giles should have either taken her to England to understand the nature of magic or counsel her instead of preaching.

When has going completely without ever done any good. Just makes the cravings that much more intense. However Willow involvement in magic not really the same as being addicted to drugs or smoking. It is more than that.

Actually the going cold Turkey was effective...no one could have forseen Taras Death...you dont think of that sort of thing...infact it was through the strength she showed that Tara came back.
Also, Willow didnt think she had a problem until after Wrecked(?), Giles had long gone. If Giles had suggested that she needed to control her power while he was there she would have just scoffed at him.......Plus its only obvious with Hindsight....at the time it seemed logical.
going cold turkey is difficult...but not impossible......many people find its the only way for them to beat an addiction.....
The very fact that the basis of the addiction was likened to being addicted to drugs totally suggest that its a magical variation of the drug...and Willows subsequient over dose at the end of the season.

Willow didn't want to be a wall flower or a computer geek. I relate so much to how Willow was in high school. If had the chance there much would change.

Willow didnt become addicted to the Magics while she was the geek, it wasn't really until Tara's mind was fiddled with that she took the plunge and went for the bigger hit. By this time she had already dropped the wall flower geek image....This wasnt about her trying to change people perception of her.

That is probably true Willow and Tara shouldn't have gotten back together so soon. Instead of calling out for help after Tara was shot she calls upon osirus. Why did she think the spell that brought the slayer back would work on a mortal.

Tara had just been shot through the heart....Osiris indicates that its a motral death...so Tara was already dead...so all the hospitals in the world would have found it near on impossible to bring her back....magic was a logical way at that moment for her as it was THE only power she wielded in that situation...and she had evidence that she could bring people back.

Tara was helpful with the focus and control. Why wasn't she as helpful swaying Willow away from the dark magic.

Eh? do you even read what you write. Fact is, by helping her stay away from ALL magic, she was helping her steer away from Dark Magic. No one could have forseen Tara's death. Willow was working at a perfectly reasonable state ESPECIALLY as Sam earlier in the season suggests that defeating a magic addiction is near on impossible and that she herself has never met someone who has done as well as Willow had done.

 

[tjkphilosopher]

Willow could be my twin

Willow making light of who she was in high school we saw when she and Tara was in the Bronze looking for Dawn on Halloween.

She wanted to be a different person back then. If I had the chance there much would have changed in high school. Who I was then is the polar opposite who am now.

Willow made first attempts to change when she took over Jenny classes. Then she came across Jenny wicca sites and spells. She was going to save herself the time and instantly change her life without fully understanding the magic she was practicing.

 

[Kimm]

Willow making light of who she was in high school we saw when she and Tara was in the Bronze looking for Dawn on Halloween.

She wanted to be a different person back then. If I had the chance there much would have changed in high school. Who I was then is the polar opposite who am now.

Willow made first attempts to change when she took over Jenny classes. Then she came across Jenny wicca sites and spells. She was going to save herself the time and instantly change her life without fully understanding the magic she was practicing.

Have we been watching the same show?

 

[tjkphilosopher]

Not to repeat history

Let me rephrase that last comment. Willow was saying to Tara if was a teen loose on Halloween the Bronze would be where go. However she quickly added well may be not me. Willow had changed so much since high school that Tara found hard to believe that Willow was a geeky wall flower.

May be if Tara had seen the early Willow would have understood better why Willow was getting more and more involved in darker more powerful spells.

I think Willow was ashamed of who she was and did not want to go back being that person. The evil Willow had referred to those days when she and Buffy faced off in the magic shop.

I can so relate. Lately I have been thinking a lot about my time in high school. There is so much that I would do differently.

 

[StuckinTraffic]

This wasnt about her trying to change people perception of her.

No, it wasn't. It was about Willow changing her self-perception. She saw herself as the geeky computer nerd wallflower and relished the power that the use of magic gave her. In her eyes, the dark magicks made her someone to be reckoned with, not the sidekick she usually was, but a force in her own right. Power corrupts.

 

[tjkphilosopher]

Know more of what getting into

Exactly my point. Willow was getting more and more involved with darker magic in order to change who she was but once she allowed those kinds of powers to affect her she became overwhelmed.

Later when they preparing for going up against the first she was holding herself back. If wasn't for Buffy giving it to the group to stop depending on her getting them out of this mess, would Willow still been able to cast the spell that gave power to all potentials. At any time could cross that line of wanting to destroy the world. Why she didn't realize the strength of the powers she was experimenting with earlier.

 

[tjkphilosopher]

Though was an interesting angle from writing perspective but as Giles pointed out to Willow in England what she has to deal with is not an addiction. It is to better understand the powers she was experimenting with. Better control of her emotions. Better focus in order to harness such powerful forces.