Warning...a little morbid...

[4.O.cious Miss]

Okay, this has been bugging me all day long...so I just have to get it out. I was working in the OR today. For those not hip to hospital lingo, that's Operating Rooms. They had an 80 year old woman come in for surgery. It was not suppoused to be a life threatning surgery. Pretty routine for most OR docs...but she died today from complications. I don't even know her name, just her case number...isn't that bad? The thing is...she didn't want to come in for the surgery to begin with...she gave the pit nurses hell today because she didn't want to be there. She kept saying she knew she was going to die. I guess her mother, grandmother, and daughter had all died on an operating table....This has haunted me all day.
So my question to you is....if you were in that situation, what would you do? If there was a surgery that you know you needed to have in order to prevent further serious health complications, but your family's surgery history is tarnished. Do you do it? Or chance suffering the consequences?

 

[Jill_Valentine]

I'd go for the surgery. Dying's dying, and I'm not terribly fearful of the prospect, but life without quality isn't living. Roll the dice.


Easy to say that from where I'm standing though, I suppose. The sickest I've ever been was a turn of pneumonia when I was younger, but I just can't imagine wanting to live no matter what.

 

[teentitan]

Hey any surgery at 80 is potentially health threatning! I really don't think her family history of death on the table can apply here, she was 80! Her worry could have been a case of seniors dimensia which you probably know makes them equivalent to a dog with a bone.
If the surgery was important enough she could not back out then what choice is there really? Slow agonizing death or possibly dieing while being anesthetized? Sorta a no brainer to me.
I have a disease which is slowly taking me down. All the side effects from the drugs has caused me to have about 12 surgeries over the last 5 years. I needed two or I would have slowly gone blind from the infection. I needed another one or I would have become impotent! When it comes to quality of life I have always taken the surgery it's worth the risk cause I am getting sick of living with pain everyday.
I can understand this bugging you but hey she was 80 and that is a full life. If she was in her 20's then yeah it would suck. Remember that old saying "Shit happens and when your numbers up, it's up."

 

[Schillaci]

Okay, this has been bugging me all day long...so I just have to get it out. I was working in the OR today. For those not hip to hospital lingo, that's Operating Rooms. They had an 80 year old woman come in for surgery. It was not suppoused to be a life threatning surgery. Pretty routine for most OR docs...but she died today from complications. I don't even know her name, just her case number...isn't that bad? The thing is...she didn't want to come in for the surgery to begin with...she gave the pit nurses hell today because she didn't want to be there. She kept saying she knew she was going to die. I guess her mother, grandmother, and daughter had all died on an operating table....This has haunted me all day.
So my question to you is....if you were in that situation, what would you do? If there was a surgery that you know you needed to have in order to prevent further serious health complications, but your family's surgery history is tarnished. Do you do it? Or chance suffering the consequences?

I am not superstitious. I would have the operation done. Your question strikes me as strange in the context of your experience. It seems like its an afterthought, really you just want someone to give your experience meaning. For there to be some purpose to her death that would lead to some cathartic understanding of it beyond the very simple 'shit happens'.

Hey any surgery at 80 is potentially health threatning! I really don't think her family history of death on the table can apply here, she was 80! Her worry could have been a case of seniors dimensia which you probably know makes them equivalent to a dog with a bone.
If the surgery was important enough she could not back out then what choice is there really? Slow agonizing death or possibly dieing while being anesthetized? Sorta a no brainer to me.
I have a disease which is slowly taking me down. All the side effects from the drugs has caused me to have about 12 surgeries over the last 5 years. I needed two or I would have slowly gone blind from the infection. I needed another one or I would have become impotent! When it comes to quality of life I have always taken the surgery it's worth the risk cause I am getting sick of living with pain everyday.
I can understand this bugging you but hey she was 80 and that is a full life. If she was in her 20's then yeah it would suck. Remember that old saying "Shit happens and when your numbers up, it's up."

I intended to make a joke about masturbation. Then I thought, you know what, that's just wrong, he has a disease that's slowly killing him and you're gonna joke about it? THEN, I realised, if you can't laugh when you're slowly dying from an incurable disease then when can you laugh??

Honestly, I have complete faith that they will find the cure to what ever your disease is...about 200 years from now. Until then I'll be on the sidelines cheering. Go teeny, go teeny, go teeny...:cheering:

 

[4.O.cious Miss]

I am not superstitious. I would have the operation done. It seems like its an afterthought, really you just want someone to give your experience meaning.

I could say I'm not superstitious, but I would be lying. I guess I am more so than some, and not quite as much as others. As far as seeking meaning? Not so much. Every death has meaning. I was a tad emotional when I original posted this. My appologies. But mostly I was just trying to get everyones views on the subject. Age, quality of life, fear of death, superstition...etc.....😉

 

[Willow Rosenberg]

I honestly don't know.....heck, I was supposed to go for tests in the summer....still haven't been, so I kinda figure I'd probably look for an excuse to put surgery off.

Not the best way to go about things, but sometimes it's all way too scary. I've never been one to confront things, really wish I was.

teentitan - Your words have affected me more than I can say, in a good way, so thank you for those. There's loads more I'd like to say, but I'm not quite sure how to without sounding, well, you know.... so I'm going to go with a simple *hug*. 😉

 

[Faldor]

I gotta say, It wasn't your decision to put her on the table. so stop treating yourself as if it was.

What's done is done and it wasnt your call.

 

[Randy Giles]

Having an operation or treatment isn't always worth it. For example, if I had serious cancer that was going to kill me, and I could have radiation therapy, which would just give me a little extra time, I wouldn't do it. I've had family members in that situation and I see what it does to them...it's just not worth it. My great aunt, before she died, said she wished she hadn't done it. I would just spend what time I had left with the people I loved, and not risk either dying from an operation or getting even sicker from the treatment.

 

[killerdwarf]

The thing is...she didn't want to come in for the surgery to begin with...she gave the pit nurses hell today because she didn't want to be there. She kept saying she knew she was going to die. I guess her mother, grandmother, and daughter had all died on an operating table....This has haunted me all day.
So my question to you is....if you were in that situation, what would you do? If there was a surgery that you know you needed to have in order to prevent further serious health complications, but your family's surgery history is tarnished. Do you do it? Or chance suffering the consequences?

I read a book by a fellow named Gavin De Becker called "The Gift of Fear". In it, he says that people who say stuff like that aren't being superstitious, they are actually engaging in a high-stakes analysis of the situation. It's hard to explain, but he talks about a woman who was having her son go into surgery for some minor thing. She had a "bad feeling" about the surgery, because she had talked to the doctor beforehand and had become uneasy because of his words and his demeanor. Her son felt it too, since he was crying not to go...he died on the table. De Becker postulates that her "feeling" was a result of subconscious analysis of the situation. NSM, maybe this woman knew she was not well, and hadn't told anyone...maybe she knew that she too had the same predisposition for dying under anaesthetic as her relatives had...in any case, you had no reason to stop the surgery, and I suspect you couldn't have anyway...surgeons tend to be very stubborn, and don't play well with others...SHE, on the other hand, could have stopped it if she wanted to...she had all the info, she chose not to act on her fears for whatever reason, and it cost her (sorry).

BTW, De Becker is no fraud. He's the head of a security firm that protects many famous people, including numerous Presidents...

As for the question at hand...it would really depend on the severity of the surgery and the degree of "tarnish" in the medical history. If I had as many relatives as that lady die on the table, I'd be a lot quicker to get as many tests as needed and then some before I agreed to go on the table. And at 80, the severity is high regardless of the proceedure...I would have said no in her case.

Here's De Becker's website: https://www.gavindebecker.com/index.cfm

 

[Edmund Blackadder]

My simple belief in life is you will die when it is your time.
You can't fight death, it's the only true constant - it will happen.
So along the path of life, should you need any surgery go for it, the possibility that it will imporve your health surely is better than a what if?