Whiskey soaked rambling

[Shayla]

I'm not really sure if this fits in here, so uhm,if it doesn't just move it where it belongs ok?! thx
Truth be told I don't really know why I'm writing this, I guess I just have to get a few things of my chest so I can 'breath' again.

It all started out with me wondering about Life itself. Which is never a good thing, cause once I start to question it I usually dont stop for a long time.
So I was watching BtVS, don't ask which episode, I can't remember, but it was the one were Spike (?) tells Buffy that ev'ry Slayer has a Death Wish.
And me being myself I kinda started to think about that too. I mean don't we all sometimes have a 'death wish'?

Okay, I know,...don't look at me like that, I'm just wondering?! Nothing to worry about!!


And seeing what live throws at me, ev'ry now and then I catch myself thinking Why do I even bother? and the reason are lessning each time.

Now ye all might wonder why. And honestly I do too! I mean, yeah, my life's been crappy so far. I lost my two best friends, my parents official don't give a damn about what happens to my sister or me, my mom isnt even capable of raising a child, my sis is turning into a rebel worse than I ever was, and I was really bad ass...
Okay, maybe not the best reasons. but the list is ALOT longer. I just can't be bother to write them all down. Or to even think about them.
So ok, ye might think that I'm a bit 'wacky' or 'out of it' or whatever,.. nope, I'm not! just good old me thinking WAY too much.

*glares at almost empty whiskey bottle* ...and yes I am drunk, first time in...uhm 4 years I think!



So Whats the point in living?Good question, huh? And I don't know,.. honestly. And I don't really care either. I've seen alot of things in my live, and I would rather forget about many of them. But seeing as those things I
experienced have turned me into that person that I am now, I'm not so sure if just forgetting would be a solution.

okay, and now that I'm actually starting to sobber up a lil' bit, I'm just gona shut up.

 

[Professor Walsh]

Oh bummer. I wrote a long answer, then I ruined it by using the same page to google to get this quote right:

Life's not a song
Life isn't bliss
Life is just this
It's living
You'll get along
The pain that you feel
You only can heal
By living

You know, if you've been honest about your age, I'd say you've got ten very good years coming on. You'll get control over your own life, year by year, and while grown up-life sometimes looks boring there is a lot of contentment to be had from being in control of your own life.

Oh, and Shayla: Drink watered-down orange juice today. It won't cure the hangover, but it'll help your body rehydrate. And you'll need that. Was it a good whiskey? (Is whiskey good? I prefer whisky myself.)

 

[white avenger]

**You know, if you've been honest about your age, I'd say you've got ten very good years coming on. You'll get control over your own life, year by year, and while grown up-life sometimes looks boring there is a lot of contentment to be had from being in control of your own life.**

I'll see your ten and raise you twenty more, and, though I've had a few bad DAYS along the way, I've had some damn good ones too, so I guess the scales tip over on the "good" side pretty well. But, no, I'm not going to ramble on about 61 years of war and peace, feast and famine, happiness and heartbreak. I'm just gonna say that, through the grace of God and the love of family and more than a few good friends, I've managed to get this far, and I fully intend to keep hanging around for quite a few years to come.

I'm not going to quote Tennyson's "Ulysses" here (because I couldn't ), but you should really read it sometime. Basically, it's the old warrior, faced with only the twilight years that he has left, saying, "To hell with it. Life's too good to just quit." so he gathers up all of his old friends, loads up his ship, and heads out in search of new adventure, planning to "sail beyond the sunset" for as long as he can. I disagree with Spike's song about life. Life isn't just "living," life is an adventure, and a wonderful journey. you just have to get past the bad places and cherish and look forward to all the good ones.


***Oh, and Shayla: Drink watered-down orange juice today. It won't cure the hangover, but it'll help your body rehydrate. And you'll need that. Was it a good whiskey? (Is whiskey good? I prefer whisky myself.)***

And if you get really sick, eat plenty of crackers or popcorn to keep your stomach full.

 

[Professor Walsh]

I disagree with Spike's song about life. Life isn't just "living," life is an adventure, and a wonderful journey. you just have to get past the bad places and cherish and look forward to all the good ones.

Perhaps I went from much too long to a little too short. The post I accidentally deleted had slipped into a me-mode that was sufficiently self centered to give season 1-Cordelia a run for her money. That was certainly not what I intended, so I didn't rewrite it, but I should have taken time to write something else. What I meant, is that I actually have grown to cherish the small things. Being woken up by a hungry four year old, having a job I enjoy, getting a chocolate and a card in the mail from a friend, seeing the sun shine on the yard of snow outside the window "¦ These are details worth enjoying. That doesn't take away from enjoying the adventures, I've also been on funky adventures to exotic places, but I have learned that there are pleasures to be had from both everyday and adventures. When I was younger I often let melancholy, regrets and dreams of great adventures overshadow my current situation. (Therefrom stems my penchant for broody lovers (in fiction!) and tragic love.)

Btw, don't believe for a second that I think I've seen it all because I've reached the ripe old age of thirty-something. It's just that I think life from teenager until now has become constantly better. That doesn't mean that I haven't seen a share of pain, I certainly have, but in general I think it's WAY better to be 31 than to be 13. But I can hardly speak of what it's like to be sixty. I just know that I look forward to the next decades, too, and hope I live to see quite a few more.

 

[white avenger]

Being woken up by a hungry four year old, having a job I enjoy, getting a chocolate and a card in the mail from a friend, seeing the sun shine on the yard of snow outside the window … These are details worth enjoying. That doesn’t take away from enjoying the adventures, I’ve also been on funky adventures to exotic places, but I have learned that there are pleasures to be had from both everyday and adventures. When I was younger I often let melancholy, regrets and dreams of great adventures overshadow my current situation. (Therefrom stems my penchant for broody lovers (in fiction!) and tragic love.)

Btw, don’t believe for a second that I think I’ve seen it all because I’ve reached the ripe old age of thirty-something. It’s just that I think life from teenager until now has become constantly better. That doesn’t mean that I haven’t seen a share of pain, I certainly have, but in general I think it’s WAY better to be 31 than to be 13. But I can hardly speak of what it’s like to be sixty. I just know that I look forward to the next decades, too, and hope I live to see quite a few more.

My friend, being awakened by a hungry baby and enjoying seeing a beautiful landscape are some of the greatest adventures in life. You don't have to explore the Amazon or white water raft down the Grand Canyon. There's adventure in everything that we do every day. You just have to look for it.

(As far as being 60 is concerned, I'll tell you what it's like. It's just like being 30, except your joints hurt more.)

Please don't think that I was in any way trying to belittle anything that you said, or put myself up as some kind of authority on the meaning of life and the universe, because I most certainly am not. I was just trying to say that, even if Shayla doesn't believe it right now, life can and does get better. I think that we pretty well agree on that.

 

[JenniferAlice]

Shayla, it's cool man. Sometimes you feel like you're stuck in a rut, everything is crap, you don't know why you bother, but we're all here, even if we didn't ask to be, we just need to deal with it. And it sucks even more if your life feels out of control, if you feel trapped and stuck in your own life, but it will get better, and the drinking won't help..it temporarily makes you feel better, but it doesn't last. Clear your head, think about the good things in life. 99.9% is shit, but there's always that 0.01%..you've just got to look for it.

 

[Shayla]

omg, I can't believe I really posted this,...I woke up a few minutes ago, and somewhere in the back of my mind I had this memory of posting something in here.
:drunk: and I really hoped that I didn't, argh, no such luck.

aw, don't worry about the hangover, I don't get those :biggrin: hm,...okay,...*blushes*

 

[definition of insane]

/me hugs Shay anyway

I think we all have times like that. Where we're drunk and depressed and think about the downsides more than the upsides of life. But hopefully it all passes and the sun shines bright and all that other cliched stuff we tell ourselves so that we keep working at it, but it helps you know?

It also helps to talk to people when you really need to...even if it's for a pep up 🙂

 

[Relic]

There comes a time in your life when it starts to actually become what you make of it...your heading toward that time. You'll make bad decisions and good ones and receive the rewards of both...either by a life lesson or success at something. The most important one I learned when I felt similar to you was there can be a lot of willingness to being a victim, there is a lot of giving up in it and it absolves you of some responsibility. When questioning 'why even try' you loose that all important Yoda, do or do not...and you quit making the willfull effort to succeed and stop seeing failure as a lesson to help you succeedd the next go round..

The important thing is you strive not to be the person you are made as by your life experiences, but instead get a definition of how you want to see yourself and then put yourself into situations that reflect that goal; let your character define your life experiences as well as how you deal with them. Don't be a product of your surroundings, or give them power to change your spirit- unless thats what you want to be.

I see your concern for your sister, that makes you a good person in my book. I heard tell of a good person with a little sister with the odds stacked against them once before, that person even had a title put onto them from birth- talk about being defined by your experiences. She decided to define her own condition though (and though it was of some debate on this board not long ago) she decided to live for her sister, not much unlike your doing now.

Sorry, didn't mean to go down the 'Buffy teaches lessons on how to live' road, but though you might question the big 'why'..... in a manner reflected by your original post I imagine you have at least a partial answer.

Live your life and put up with all the negative crap so you can enjoy the happy moments. Some times have more of them then others, but the older you get and the longer you survive...(as long as your learning) you increase the odds of stacking those good experiences in your favor as long as your heads focused on not giving up.

I've felt very likely almost the same as you at a time in my life, please believe me when I say there is a potential for change for the better, part of that depends on fighting the good fight to win, not tie. and seeing failure and hurt as a lesson not a condition.

Good luck, now get out there and kick what needs kicked 🙂

 

[Shayla]

After reading my first post again I just realised that it would've made alot more sence IF I had actually writen all that I was thinking and not just every other sentence,...crap....lol

 

[palabravampiress]

Ah... why even bother? Why are we here? What's the meaning of life?

Unfortunately, no human being has satisfactorily hit upon one single answer that sort of sums all of this up. If it makes you feel better, though, most of us do wonder about these things -- especially while we're under the influence. I would even argue the possibility that most of humanity's greatest artistic achievements come from the basic desire to justify our existence.

Alternatively, the answer could be "42."

 

[InsaneMystic]

Alternatively, the answer could be "42."

My dearest palabra. 42 is the answer to The Last Question, not to "what is the meaning of life?"

(But of course you knew that and were just in too much of a hurry to write it out in detail for us unenlightened rabble. Don't shatter my illusions about you as Giles-woman! 🙂 )

 

[bigmoneygrip]

This has nothing to do with the thread, except for the fact that it did have the word "whiskey" in the title.

My two favorite whiskeys (although they would most correctly be called 'bourbon') lately are Knob Creek and Booker's. Very smooth. Worth the price.

 

[Revolver]

Now someone is actually rambling about whiskey!

 

[Professor Walsh]

This has nothing to do with the thread, except for the fact that it did have the word "whiskey" in the title.

My two favorite whiskeys (although they would most correctly be called 'bourbon') lately are Knob Creek and Booker's. Very smooth. Worth the price.

Hm. Perhaps I need to keep an eye ope for those, then. I have yet to try a bourbon I found worth the expense. Now whisky (that would be "scotch" for some of you across the big lump of water), on the other hand ... Have you tried Islay malts? :coolman:

 

[bigmoneygrip]

Hm. Perhaps I need to keep an eye ope for those, then. I have yet to try a bourbon I found worth the expense. Now whisky (that would be "scotch" for some of you across the big lump of water), on the other hand ... Have you tried Islay malts? :coolman:

A good single malt whiskey is also a thing of beauty - I'll have to look here for the Islay malts. Thanks for the tip.