Who had the worst childhood?

[sosa lola]

So that kind of "emotional abuse" is abnormal? Gee we are a bunch of arseholes in Oz. Xanders life was freaking amazing, when compared with abuse that comes from other places than words.

Never underestimate the effect of neglect and a bad word said to a child constantly from the people who are supposed to love and support them. Especially when that child gets bullied in school. So, both home and school are a constant nightmare. Never underestimate the fear of watching your parents fight, throw things at each other, and putting you in the middle. If Xander's life was amazing, then why would he avoid spending time with his folks on special occasions like Christmas and Thanks Giving? If his life was amazing then why did he want to visit Willow's mother but not his parents? Why did he call them scary?

Now Xander mentions that his father tried to sell him once. Clearly that accounts for abuse. Clearly his father attempted that when he was drunk.

Xanders parents cant be blamed for his shitty choices as much as they can be blamed for his good ones.

I didn't blame them for his bad choices. I said the way he was raised shows in how he handles his life. But his mistakes are his responsibility.

 

[GwenRaiden]

I always thought Xander saying his dad tried to sell him to Armenians was a joke. Xander is a self-deprecating guy. His dad probably joked about it and that's where he got it from. Not that it was an appropriate joke to make about your child but I don't think he actually set up a meeting to sell him to Armenians and then, like, Xander managed to escape or something.

 

[Skanky Vamp]

Now Xander mentions that his father tried to sell him once. Clearly that accounts for abuse. Clearly his father attempted that when he was drunk.

My mother said she tried to sell me but no one wanted to pay for me. Then she complained she could not even give me away. She later said I was adopted and not really their kid. Then she said she saw 666 on my head. Then she said my real mother must have been a monkey. She always threatened that when I was at school they would pack up and move and I would come back to an empty house.

I wouldn't call that abuse. It's how some normal families talk to one another. Or at least how they used to before people got so politically correct and easily butthurt.

 

[sosa lola]

I always thought Xander saying his dad tried to sell him to Armenians was a joke. Xander is a self-deprecating guy. His dad probably joked about it and that's where he got it from. Not that it was an appropriate joke to make about your child but I don't think he actually set up a meeting to sell him to Armenians and then, like, Xander managed to escape or something.

You're probably right but I choose to believe its true because it's more interesting and can be explained by his father being too drunk when it happened. It's like that one line Spike said about Spangel which doesn't necessarily mean they did have sex but it's more interesting to believe they did.

 

[Buffy Summers]

I always thought Xander saying his dad tried to sell him to Armenians was a joke. Xander is a self-deprecating guy.

Exactly. You can't take every sentence said in the show literally.

 

[sosa lola]

Exactly. You can't take every sentence said in the show literally.

IMO, this is fiction. Every line is put there for a reason. Other than the Cheese Man who Joss did say it meant nothing, everything else is up to interpretation. Especially in a show that doesn't seem to care much about addressing the home lives of its characters - other than Buffy. Every mention of the other characters' parents should be taken as a clue to how this character's home is like. That's how I feel.

If we keep dismissing everything, then it's just the same old thing. And it gets dull fast. New discoveries, new interpretations are what keeps this show interesting especially for old fans like me.

Especially from the main joker of the show.

Xander is more the Sad Clown who hides pain behind jokes. Something we see in the hospital scene when he jokes around despite the trauma that just happened to him. Something Anya accuses him of. Those comments said by him shouldn't be tossed aside as a lie just because he jokes a lot.

Why are comments said by other characters more valid than what Xander says? Buffy's "Just grab another drink" to Joyce in Becoming implies that Joyce drinks a lot, yet we have never seen her with any alcohol before. And it seems everybody is taking Buffy's comment as the ultimate truth.

At least Xander's father is a raging alcoholic and stuff like attempting to sell his son or beating him can happen when someone is drunk out of his mind.

 

[Sternbeeere]

Every mention of the other characters' parents should be taken as a clue to how this character's home is like. That's how I feel.

Same here, hence my speculation about Ben and Glory. Like if Ben calls Glory sister, than he sees her as that and if Glory says he is family to her, than he is. If Glory is rich and Ben is able to study medicine, their money must stem from somewhere and so on.

Regarding Xanders sentence: Regardless whether or not this sentence was meant to be true or a joke, what is real, that his parents were arguing all the time and his dad was an alcoholic, it is stated in season 10 comics. Additionally he has anger issues, due to which he has to visit a therapist. He also explains them with experiences from his childhood. I think both is enough to get a glimpse how Xanders childhood was.

 

[GwenRaiden]

Why are comments said by other characters more valid than what Xander says? Buffy's "Just grab another drink" to Joyce in Becoming implies that Joyce drinks a lot, yet we have never seen her with any alcohol before. And it seems everybody is taking Buffy's comment as the ultimate truth.

At least Xander's father is a raging alcoholic and stuff like attempting to sell his son or beating him can happen when someone is drunk out of his mind.

Those comments said by him shouldn't be tossed aside as a lie just because he jokes a lot.

I guess my interpretation of that is down to the context. Buffy is saying that to anger Joyce or to provoke her. Whereas Xander saying his dad tried to sell him to some Armenians wasn't as serious a situation or scene - he said it as a joke to one of his friends.

I do however believe Xander does joke to mask his pain, or to deal with tough situations as a coping mechanism. Just not in this instance. My opinion is it's more likely he is repeating a drunken joke by his dad.

 

[Buffy Summers]

If we keep dismissing everything, then it's just the same old thing. And it gets dull fast. New discoveries, new interpretations are what keeps this show interesting especially for old fans like me.

Speculation is fine. But it's just as valid for me to say that I think you read too much into things that are said. Headcanon is fine but that doesn't mean we saw it on the show.

Buffy's "Just grab another drink" to Joyce in Becoming implies that Joyce drinks a lot, yet we have never seen her with any alcohol before. And it seems everybody is taking Buffy's comment as the ultimate truth.

I don't. I have never seen Joyce as an alcoholic.