Why the Xander hate?

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Anyways, as hilarious as he is, he just always kinda bugs me. He said the wrong things, at the wrong time. In the midst of terror and fright, he would just make a stupid joke. I understand that people have different reactions to different situations, but I mean it just isn't right. "The world is ending? Well can it at least wait until I finish this last cookie?". I mean, I know even Buffy herself joked but when it came down to it, she buckled up and fought.

I actually love that about him. 😀 Much funnier than hiding behind Buffy or screaming and running away. Xander does buckle up and fight, and occasionally he gets the best of the enemy and occasionally he gets slapped away like a fly. He's brave and I love that about him.
 
His flippancy in the face of peril is indeed why I love him. Partially because I do the exact same thing in similar situations. It's a way of coping and trying to lighten the mood and maybe make others feel at ease.
 
O
Ollehh
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He said the wrong things, at the wrong time. In the midst of terror and fright, he would just make a stupid joke. I understand that people have different reactions to different situations, but I mean it just isn't right.

You do realize that pretty much all characters made that type of jokes? Like Buffy in Becoming:

Willow: This means I can't help you study for tomorrow's final.

Buffy: Ah, I'll wing it. Of course, if we go to Hell by then, I won't have to take 'em. Or maybe I'll be taking them forever.
 
I actually love that about him. 😀 Much funnier than hiding behind Buffy or screaming and running away. Xander does buckle up and fight, and occasionally he gets the best of the enemy and occasionally he gets slapped away like a fly. He's brave and I love that about him.

Agreed, I always felt that Xander was rather admirably willing to buckle up and fight, often beyond his own capabilities. He bravely did the best he could and I more or less see more and more of this whenever I re-watch the seasons and love him all the more for it.
 
BuffyElevated
BuffyElevated
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paks
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You do realize that pretty much all characters made that type of jokes? Like Buffy in Becoming:

Willow: This means I can't help you study for tomorrow's final.

Buffy: Ah, I'll wing it. Of course, if we go to Hell by then, I won't have to take 'em. Or maybe I'll be taking them forever.

If you read trough my post all the way through, you'll see me admitting to the fact that everyone else did it as well. He was just excessive about and it became annoying. Not only that, but I find him very hypocritical. He's always giving Buffy all this lip about her being with Angel, and then starts to date Anya. You would think that we would have a bit more of an open mind after that when she started being with Spike, but as we could all see, that was a no go. To me, he thought of himself as someone that can do no wrong. That his word was law.

Anyways, I'm done here. I hate Xander, but love him in s8. That's my answer and I'm stickin. To it.
 
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zobothehobo
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To me, he thought of himself as someone that can do no wrong. That his word was law.

Xander thought his word was law? He was always overruled by Buffy, Giles or Willow whenever he disagreed with them about something important, yet he continued to follow their lead nevertheless. And I don't see that supposed confidence, either. The guy is always plagued by doubts and insecurities. He leaves Anya because he doesn't trust himself. He can't hold a job for long in S4 because he lacks confidence. He thinks he is stupid. In The Zeppo he thinks he is useless to the gang, despite already having saved Buffy more times than the rest of the group put together. I think Xander is very much prone to underestimating himself, actually.
 
Taake
Taake
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sosa lola
I agree.
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TheFirstSlayer
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BuffyElevated
BuffyElevated
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How could anyone hate Xander? He's so cute! I mean sure he said some mean things...he messed up a couple times..but that is not good enough reason to HATE him. Everyone else on the show made mistakes along with him...though I can't recall him making any HUGE mistakes such as: Getting addicted to magic and nearly ending the world ( BTW Xander actually stopped that ), Lying to her friends ALL THE TIME and keeping secrets like it's her job ( Buffy..Heaven, Angel, Spike). I'm not trying to hate on Buffy or Willow..I'm just pointing out their mistakes, so Xander's won't seem that bad 🙂 I love all the characters..and I am especially sympathetic with them considering their sucky life
 
I actually love that about him. 😀 Much funnier than hiding behind Buffy or screaming and running away. Xander does buckle up and fight, and occasionally he gets the best of the enemy and occasionally he gets slapped away like a fly. He's brave and I love that about him.
I loved that about him to he brought the funny when was needed but he was also caring.
I think he is very brave I would not want to take on Dark Willow oh no I would not. Wait to go Xander for that one, the fact that he went up against her in the first place then was willing to die if that isn't brave what is?
 
You do realize that pretty much all characters made that type of jokes? Like Buffy in Becoming:

Willow: This means I can't help you study for tomorrow's final.

Buffy: Ah, I'll wing it. Of course, if we go to Hell by then, I won't have to take 'em. Or maybe I'll be taking them forever.

There's a big difference between laughing at yourself like Buffy was, or making light of a bad situation and between laughing at, and being nasty to, other people. Just saying.
 
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zobothehobo
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There's a big difference between laughing at yourself like Buffy was, or making light of a bad situation and between laughing at, and being nasty to, other people. Just saying.

To be honest I think all characters tend to be nasty to each other. Not just Xander. Spike, Anya, and Cordelia are the prime examples standing beside Xander.

Buffy, too, tends to be nasty when she's scared or angry.
 
To me, Xander comes off the worst in early Season 3. He's by far Buffy's worst critic in both "Dead Man's Party" and "Revelations" and never even begins to try to consider her point of view.

Oh, and he thinks he's "Perspective Guy"...

BUFFY
As if I could have gone to you, Xander.
You made your feelings about me and
Angel pretty clear-

XANDER
Look - I'm sorry your honey was a
demon, but most girls don't hop a
Greyhound over boy trouble!

Perspective fail. He just completely demeaned Buffy, trivialized her very serious problems, simplified Angel and displaced all the guilt over The Lie to Buffy. What annoys me is that, much like The Lie, many of Xander's comments in this period are never properly dealt with. They're just swept under the rug until the next Scooby blow-up.

Xander, bless his heart, makes up for all this in the magnificent "The Zeppo".
 
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zobothehobo
I HATE how he thinks he's "perspective guy."
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prophecygrrl
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InsaneMystic
absolutely agreed about DMP... an ep that makes me want to take Joyce and beat up Xander with her as a club, and then the other way around! :fuming:
I think he makes up for it in Amends when he admits he wasn't really her bestest friend when it came to Angel but he'd help her save him.
 
There's a big difference between laughing at yourself like Buffy was, or making light of a bad situation and between laughing at, and being nasty to, other people. Just saying.

Okay but this has nothing to do with what I said, so I am bit puzzled why you quoted me. Just saying.

To me, Xander comes off the worst in early Season 3. He's by far Buffy's worst critic in both "Dead Man's Party" and "Revelations" and never even begins to try to consider her point of view.

Of course, Cordelia agreed with Xander in both cases (and called Buffy a freak in DMP) and Giles scolded Buffy way more harshly than Xander did in Revelations but why bother mention those inconvenient facts. It's always Xander's fault for daring to suggest that Buffy might not be infallible.
 
Of course, Cordelia agreed with Xander in both cases (and called Buffy a freak in DMP) and Giles scolded Buffy way more harshly than Xander did in Revelations but why bother mention those inconvenient facts. It's always Xander's fault for daring to suggest that Buffy might not be infallible.

I might be remembering wrong here because I hate watching DMP because it pisses me off so much... but didn't Cordelia actually try to stand up for Buffy and give Buffy's perspective. I mean, yeah, she called her a freak... but she was like "you've got to consider where Buffy's coming from." And then Buffy shot her down and that was one of the few times that episode I was like "Buffy, shut up and sit down. Let the woman talk!"
 
Well, I think Cordelia was obviously sarcastic. If she wasn't, her saying that it's natural for Buffy the freak to pick another freak for a boyfriend and that Angel's killing spree was pretty much Buffy's fault is a very odd way of supporting her.
 
Well, I think Cordelia was obviously sarcastic. If she wasn't, her saying that it's natural for Buffy the freak to pick another freak for a boyfriend and that Angel's killing spree was pretty much Buffy's fault is a very odd way of supporting her.

Taken from the transcript on Buffyworld.com

Xander: Look. I'm sorry that your honey was a demon, but most girls
don't hop a Greyhound over boy troubles.

Cordelia doesn't think this is fair, and intercedes.

Cordelia: Time out, Xander. Put yourself in Buffy's shoes for just a
minute. Okay? I'm Buffy, freak of nature, right? Naturally I pick a
freak for a boyfriend, and then he turns into Mr. Killing Spree, which
is pretty much my fault--

Buffy: (interrupts) Cordy! Get outta my shoes!

Cordelia: I'm just trying to help, Buffy.

I'm 99% sure Cordelia was going somewhere with that... Yes, she called Buffy a freak. Yes, she said Angelus was Buffy's fault. But where we were with Cordy's character here, she couldn't say something 100% nice. From who Cordelia was back in season 3, I'm pretty darn sure she was trying to help... and I'm 99% sure if Buffy had just let her keep going, she would have said something good. I mean she opened her mouth because she thought Xander crossed a line and was being too harsh. Which means she would say that.
 
I might be remembering wrong here because I hate watching DMP because it pisses me off so much... but didn't Cordelia actually try to stand up for Buffy and give Buffy's perspective. I mean, yeah, she called her a freak... but she was like "you've got to consider where Buffy's coming from." And then Buffy shot her down and that was one of the few times that episode I was like "Buffy, shut up and sit down. Let the woman talk!"


BUFFY
As if I could have gone to you, Xander.
You made your feelings about me and
Angel pretty clear-
XANDER
Look - I'm sorry your honey was a
demon, but most girls don't hop a
Greyhound over boy trouble!
CORDELIA
Time out, Xand. I mean, put yourself
in Buffy's shoes for a minute. I'm
Buffy - freak of nature - right? Naturally,
I pick a freak for a boyfriend...
Then he's Mister Killing Spree, which
is pretty much my fault, and --
BUFFY
(interrupting)
Cordy. Get out of my shoes.
CORDELIA
I'm just trying to help. If you haven't
noticed, Buffy, people aren't exactly
lining up to give you props-

Same..I wish Buffy would have let Cordy talk..but still Cordy may have been trying to be nice and stand up for her but she was doing a rlly bad job at that.
 
I'm 99% sure Cordelia was going somewhere with that... Yes, she called Buffy a freak. Yes, she said Angelus was Buffy's fault. But where we were with Cordy's character here, she couldn't say something 100% nice. From who Cordelia was back in season 3, I'm pretty darn sure she was trying to help... and I'm 99% sure if Buffy had just let her keep going, she would have said something good. I mean she opened her mouth because she thought Xander crossed a line and was being too harsh. Which means she would say that.

Kind of a double standard, don't you think? Maybe Xander was going to say something nicer too, had the zombies not attacked. When Cordelia or Anya or Spike insult Buffy that's somehow considered hilarious but if Xander (or Riley for that matter) dares tell anything that's not 100% supportive he is a misogynist asshole. yes, I know, hyperbole, but it's a rather common attitude in fandom, IMO.
 
I'm 99% sure Cordelia was going somewhere with that... Yes, she called Buffy a freak. Yes, she said Angelus was Buffy's fault. But where we were with Cordy's character here, she couldn't say something 100% nice. From who Cordelia was back in season 3, I'm pretty darn sure she was trying to help... and I'm 99% sure if Buffy had just let her keep going, she would have said something good. I mean she opened her mouth because she thought Xander crossed a line and was being too harsh. Which means she would say that.

No offense, but you clearly lack any understanding whatsoever of these characters. Cordy enjoys being bitchy and mean, heck, she calls Buffy a sick freak to her face only a few episodes later and it's Xander that has to pull them apart. Xander may go off on Buffy, but he does it because he cares that she's trying to run away again, or because he cares that she's sheltering Angel and endangering them all. And no, I'm not excusing Xander's behavior, but I don't see how anyone in their right mind can say Cordelia was a better friend to Buffy than Xander was.
 
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zobothehobo
I'm sorry, but I took great offense to this.
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