Willow's Sexuality

i also agree that what she had with oz was a real love its obvious how they felt about each other but it is possible for someone of a different sexuality to fall for someone outside there gender while there young, it may even feel like true love but if you look at the way willow felt and acted for oz and they way she responded and became herself with tara which love do u think was more powerfull for willow? also whats your opinon on bisexuality airam? do you believe it exists or do you think everyone just loves one gender and thats it
 
i also agree that what she had with oz was a real love its obvious how they felt about each other but it is possible for someone of a different sexuality to fall for someone outside there gender while there young, it may even feel like true love but if you look at the way willow felt and acted for oz and they way she responded and became herself with tara which love do u think was more powerfull for willow? also whats your opinon on bisexuality airam? do you believe it exists or do you think everyone just loves one gender and thats it

Right, but I don't think it just felt like true love to Willow in hindsight, I think it WAS true love with Oz. I think it was true love with Tara too. No one ever loves two people the same way, its different but it doesn't make it any easier to pinpoint which she neccesarily loved more, I'm not in Willow's head I have no way to tell. But I have to disagree that Willow "became herself" with Tara because if thats so you're saying she wasn't herself before Tara... I personally like early Willow a bit more than later Willow (but thats a whole other topic) regardless though people change, life experience molds you, but it doesn't make the person she was while she was with Oz any less genuine does it?

I believe bisexuality does exists, thats kind of the case I'm making for Willow. I believe that there are people out there that are able to just completely see beyond gender and fall in love on a person by person basis. I think it goes deeper than, "Oh I think boys and girls are hot." Thats what i think happened to Willow, she just fell in love, in both cases, she allowed herself to feel without being too concerned about whether that person had a penis or a vagina. I think that in these cases the emotrional connection comes first and the sexual attraction naturally forms from there.
 
All I have to say about this topic is that

I love Oz, I LOVE Tara and I love Kennedy

I don't really care who end up being with Willow (even tho I would have prefered it to be Tara, but I guess that wont happen)

And do I think Willow loved them all? My answer is yes, I guess she just loved them diffenrently.

I do think that she might be bisexual but prefers girls, just like some other people might prefers guys.

anyway, I'm happy with her relation with Kennedy right now and even tho they are so diffenrent, I still think that they love each other and that is whats impostant

-Blaze-
 
I think Willow's love for the characters beside her in Buffy is an illustration on how everyone loves, or should love. Willow, as others before me have said, has a huge capacity to love, and the fact that she is with both Oz and Tara and Kennedy at one point or another shows that she is so open to love. I think everyone is open to love. My eldest brother is gay, and me myself have questioned my own sexual orientation, but the way Willow went through her life and her love is the way I feel all humans are and I didn't realize that until I read some posts above. Call it an epiphany. But maybe no one is "labeled" with gay, straight, or bi. Maybe people just find their soulmate in someone of the same sex. I've defiantly found people who I love, and who I am in love with and they are both men and women. Willow gives me hope. 🙂
 
L
luckystar
great post
Airam
Airam
:)
Professor Walsh
Professor Walsh
Lovely said.
I don't see how Willow identifying herself as gay lessens her relationship/love with Oz. Some people discover their sexuality early in life, others take much longer. Lots of gay men and women have had relationships with members of the opposite sex prior to their self-discovery. Being gay means you're SEXUALLY attracted to the same sex...love, however, is an emotion that can transcend sexual orientation. Is Willow really "bisexual"? I don't think so. After her relationship with Tara, she never expresses an interest in a man again. I do hold issue with the line "gay now!" as that implies homosexuality is something you "acquire" over time based on environment or circumstance, when really, I have no doubt it's biological in basis and homosexuals are homosexuals from the moment they're born.

Willow's discovery wasn't handled in a way I felt to be completely accurate but I do believe she is a completely gay woman...but that doesn't mean she didn't love Oz.
 
i think it would have intressting if oz had came back after tara's death weather the badness that was willow and kennedy would have happened or if willow would have gone bak to oz for real love reasons rather than a fall back through loosing tara.
 
I wonder...I think Willow falls in love with the person not the Gender...I think that spills over to sexual attraction as well.

In season 4 Willow, Tera, Anya, and Xander go to find Giles at a coffee house. They catch him singing The Who's "behind Blue Eyes" Willow goes all google eyed and says "Now I remember why I had such a crush on him in high school." In season 5 she really seems to get a lusty little celebrity fixiation on Dracula, to the point tera playfully calls her on it.

Me, I'm not so sure Willows not bi-sexual and if the right love comes around she might not care what package it's in. She seems open to attractions from both genders.
 
Airam
Airam
yep to every word :)
I think of Willow as gay.

If she was attracted to men why would she say she was gay over and over? Why would she want RJ to be a woman?

I don't know why some people say 'I hope she gets back with Oz', when she says that she's gay.
 
R
Relic
When confronted with vamp willow and her gay vibe, Willow also denied she could be gay..more or less. We are a work in progress, sure maybe she knows she gays, just like she knew she wasn't. :)
I wonder...I think Willow falls in love with the person not the Gender...I think that spills over to sexual attraction as well.

In season 4 Willow, Tera, Anya, and Xander go to find Giles at a coffee house. They catch him singing The Who's "behind Blue Eyes" Willow goes all google eyed and says "Now I remember why I had such a crush on him in high school." In season 5 she really seems to get a lusty little celebrity fixiation on Dracula, to the point tera playfully calls her on it.

Me, I'm not so sure Willows not bi-sexual and if the right love comes around she might not care what package it's in. She seems open to attractions from both genders.
I dunno...that sort of thing just doesn't happen...

I had "crushes" on girls before identifying myself as gay...sometimes I ogle really attractive women...there's just no SEXUAL subtext. It seems to me that lots of people wanna deny Willow is a lesbian simply because they think it completely invalidates the entire Willow/Oz ship...and it doesn't. Lots of people are bisexual but have a CLEAR preference. And how many people do you know in the real world who fall in love with the person, not the gender? Come on now...is Willow the beginning of a new species?
 
I didnt like how they seemed to decide that after Tara, Willow had to be gay. They treated it like she was straight, straight, straight(likeing Xander and Oz) and then when she and Tara got together there was no going back. I personally thought of Willow and Oz as two people who fell in love and fit together well, until he left. And then Willow and Tara fell in love, because of who they were as PEOPLE, not as two women. Willow is not necessarily gay or straight, she simply falls in love with people, regardless of gender. That said, I LOVE everything Whedon, and I think that for just about everything they all did an amazing job. For the most part, they dealt with willow's sexuality in a mature way, better than most tv shows, because it wasnt headlined, it was just there. I just wish they hadnt treated it like she had to be one thing or another.
 
Airam
Airam
[No message]
IRT to Purp's

Actually I know afew people who fall in love with the person not the gender, when it comes to getting their yaya's they must be very creative...or maybe it just doesn't matter much, I dunno. (I've heard their attraction to the person as a whole trumps visuals, and that personality characteristic matter much more in defining what they find attractive)

I women I know, a cousin of mine, has had afew lasting relationships with both men and women in back and forth manners...she likes each flavor equally or near equally, so it comes down to what personality is the most compatible for her. In her eyes a very attractive and receptive woman might be passed over if she could find a man with a personality she likes more; or vice versa. If she does have a preference for one gender over the other, she will break it when compatibility issues of personality attraction introduce themselves. She just does not feel that off switch to a gender determined romance that you feel for women as a homosexual or that i feel for men as a heterosexual.

As far as you saying that kind of thing just doesn't happen, your exactly right....for you. I realize your gay, but your experiences and preference does not speak for everyone in a community that has had sexual relations with both genders.

Is Willow the beginning of a new species? Come now, straight prejudice use to say the same thing about homosexuality. just because you've seen your light doesn't give you any authority to speak on behalf of everyone else. I needn't tell you to have an open mind do I?
 
It really annoyed me that they liked to say that Willow was a lesbian while she was bi-sexual. She was in love with Xander, she was in love with Oz just as much as she was in love with Tara.

I would really like for them to pair Willow up with a guy again just to show people that she is bi-sexual and not lesbian.
 
IRT to Purp's

Actually I know afew people who fall in love with the person not the gender, when it comes to getting their yaya's they must be very creative...or maybe it just doesn't matter much, I dunno. (I've heard their attraction to the person as a whole trumps visuals, and that personality characteristic matter much more in defining what they find attractive)

I women I know, a cousin of mine, has had afew lasting relationships with both men and women in back and forth manners...she likes each flavor equally or near equally, so it comes down to what personality is the most compatible for her. In her eyes a very attractive and receptive woman might be passed over if she could find a man with a personality she likes more; or vice versa. If she does have a preference for one gender over the other, she will break it when compatibility issues of personality attraction introduce themselves. She just does not feel that off switch to a gender determined romance that you feel for women as a homosexual or that i feel for men as a heterosexual.

As far as you saying that kind of thing just doesn't happen, your exactly right....for you. I realize your gay, but your experiences and preference does not speak for everyone in a community that has had sexual relations with both genders.

Is Willow the beginning of a new species? Come now, straight prejudice use to say the same thing about homosexuality. just because you've seen your light doesn't give you any authority to speak on behalf of everyone else. I needn't tell you to have an open mind do I?
I'm not speaking of just my own experience, but the experience of those around me. I'm certainly all for being open-minded, I just find the notion of gender being COMPLETELY irrelevent a little hard to swallow.
 
R
Relic
and thus you are not a bisexual :)
It really annoyed me that they liked to say that Willow was a lesbian while she was bi-sexual. She was in love with Xander, she was in love with Oz just as much as she was in love with Tara.

I would really like for them to pair Willow up with a guy again just to show people that she is bi-sexual and not lesbian.

Well she claims to be gay, so I don't think she is attracted to men.

I suppose in technical terms she could be identified as 'bisexual', but she hasn't been attracted to guys for years.
 
E
Edmund Blackadder
So what was all that arguing?
Willow being gay was never an issue for me. But how it was portrayed on the show kinda bugged me.
It would have been so much better if Willow was already looking at girls earlier on, but it was a season turn, which is too fast of a change.

Okay, lemme explain it this way. My mom is the kind of person that thinks homosexuality is wrong/sinful/etc. So when I got her to watch Buffy, Willow's sexuality obviously hit a nerve.

And for me too. Basically what my mom saw was a girl who was just left by her boyfriend, is extremely lonely, meets a nice girl, finds comfort in her, falls for her, and then BOOM! Gay now. And that's even how Willow puts it in a couple of episodes. "Uhh... Gay now!"

And that supported my mom's belief that homosexuality is a choice, when it really isn't. And a lot of people interpreted Willow's coming out that way too, which is kinda upsetting.
 
Airam
Airam
I agree, the change in her was way too abrubt and unexplained which is one of the reasons I think it makes sense that she's one that falls in love more with the person than the anatomy.
Well she claims to be gay, so I don't think she is attracted to men.

I suppose in technical terms she could be identified as 'bisexual', but she hasn't been attracted to guys for years.

Well ofcourse she claims to be gay because the writers wrote her to say that...And she has only been attracted to 4 people during the entire duration of this show. Xander/Oz/Tara/Kennedy. Willow has/should never be about the sex of the person. Because clearly the girl wasnt lesbian despite what Joss and co. want to believe.
 
Well ofcourse she claims to be gay because the writers wrote her to say that...And she has only been attracted to 4 people during the entire duration of this show. Xander/Oz/Tara/Kennedy. Willow has/should never be about the sex of the person. Because clearly the girl wasnt lesbian despite what Joss and co. want to believe.

It's up to the writers I'm afraid.

They made her gay. She was no longer into men. Sorry.
 
L
luckystar
agreed ;)
Willow is a Gay woman. She tells us this so it is true.

I have argued why she could be techincally labelled as bisexual in another thread but ultimately what she says goes.

If you do need more proof, then Him is the perfect piece. If she could entertain thoughts of 'riding stick' again then there would have been no reason to convert RJ to a woman HOWEVER she has grown accostumed to the lady bits.

I do have one thing to say though...

I suppose in technical terms she could be identified as 'bisexual',

What the hell were you arguing about last night AFTER you posted this when you clearly agree with how she could TECHNICALLY be labelled bisexual?
 
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