Abbeycat
Werewolf
I'm not able to drive my car because of the icy snow all over the driver's side and the back side of my car. So I have to rely on my dad to take me to work. Stupid icy snow!!
This forum was supposed to be an escape and I admit that now but having someone from my life come on here and read into things in the wrong way and then blame me for wanting a break from it all? How dare I. How dare I want to take such a great existence and turn my back on it for a forum? I am the most confident person I know and never doubt myself. Tonight I feel like I am the most selfish twat on the planet. I think back to when I was 15 and I was homeless, I have no right to complain about being so busy and having no free time. I have a roof over my head. Loads of friends and a girl who loves me. How dare I want to escape from all of this on the Internet?
I'm the most unappreciative and selfish person I know. I should be happy with what I have.
I was happy at one point today. I'm sure of it. Now I just want to get this day behind me. Feeling worthless even though I know I'm not. Feeling like I can't say anything right when the fact of the matter is that I can say loads of good things. Just not always. 😉 But mostly I feel like I deserve to feel like this. Go me...
New day tomorrow (soon midnight) and then I better feel better.
I'm bipolar, and for me it mostly manifests in giant bursts of enthusiasm whether I'm experiencing mania or depression. I've been able to control having random outbursts (for the most part) for three years now without the help of any medication since it's considered a "mild" case. But lately it feels like it's harder to control. I have a lot of boundless enthusiasm when I'm happy, and I seriously almost destroyed my pillows because I got upset a couple days ago. I don't know why this is going on, and I'm worried I might need medication. I hate it, and we can't afford it. I am at a loss what to do.