divorce

Originally posted by Lorne The Host
you get coolness points for actually paying attention to Dogma instead of thinking of it as just a dumb comedy, like most people do...

Thats because i'm a big Kevin Smith fan and cant even count the amount of times i've seen that movie.
 
OK. Being a Divorcee myself, I obviously agree with it.

Started dating my ex-husband at 13. Dated all through high school. Got married when we were 25. I'm telling you, the man CHANGED. Turned into his father, and basically mine. Wasn't allowed to go out alone, wasn't allowed online alone, couldn't do ANYTHING without being yelled at, chastized, etc.

At 26, I left him. A year and a half into the marriage. Left my home, my belongings, my friends, and just got away. Got divorced, and am now married to a fantastic man who treats me like gold.

I'm just lucky that we didn't have children, although that wouldn't have changed my mind, it would have made everything VERY messy.

Oh and the ex and I were both Roman Catholic and because of this I wasn't able to get re-married in a church. But at that point, that wasn't what was important to me.

Love Kevin Smith, I have an autographed copy of Clerks on DVD. 🙂
 
Originally posted by jules
Being Roman Catholic I don't agree with divorce. When you take your wedding vows it should be forever.

My friend is Romanian and shes a Roman Catholic (I think) Her sister just got married and at her wedding ceremony, the preist sang a weird song in romanian instead of talking and the guests stood most of the time and they swiched crowns (and a virgin had to do that...it was my friend) and it was like 1 hour instead of like 20 minutes and your married.....is that it??

Well I think divorce is BAD!!!!!!!!!! I only have one brother which my mom gave birth but we have different fathers. My mom was maried and had my brother and after she divorced and married my dad I was born. My dad was married 4 times before my mom. He has 3 daughters and 4 sons with 3 different women. I have a sister who is 10 months older than me. My mom was the first white woman he married (all the others were chinese and one korean) and there marige (my moms and dads) lasted 16.5 years and still strong. My dad has a total of 8 kids....my mom 2!
LOL I dont know 4 of my half brothers or sisters. Me and my half sister who is 10 months older then me are GOOD friends and we have the same last name and people look at me and go. "Savanah Cai Peilin?....you dont look asian" LOL Shan (my half sister) Does....she kept my dads last name. Her name is Shan Cai Peilin Zhian.
LOL
 
this is a hard thing to decide. I think i do belive in it, because there are some situation where its just necessary. I think it should be avoided and only be a last resort though
 
I believe in it, I think to all children who have to see their parents fight, & that shouldn't happen, coz it remains in memory, & it's really a bad one that can disturb u ur whole life.
Even thought u were married in church, u should be able to divorce, coz after all, if God do exist, I don't think He agrees when he sees ppl fight, so, it's better to break.
 
i belive in divorce! and i belive that some people jump into marrige without knowing what it really is, and what it means.. and what it demands from the ones who are married... not that you can't get married and know this, cos you can and still get divorced LOL but yeah sure i believe
 
Originally posted by Frenchy Faith
Even thought u were married in church, u should be able to divorce

You can get divorced, you just can't get re-married in a church again. At least not a Roman Catholic one.

I feel that if all other avenues have been explored and exhausted (such as couselling) then divorce can in fact be the best thing for all involved, even children.
 
Well divorce is really something that should be avoided at all costs, especially if there are children. Nevertheless, it's better to have two happy parents apart from each other, as long as they spend as much time with their kids as possible, instead of two people hating each other and affecting the whole family dynamics.
 
Divorce is painful for all involved i think.

My parents are still married, 36 years in September. They separated for three months last year and even though i'm married with a family of my own, it felt weird. But i belong to that group whose parents are still married though shouldn't be, because they're miserable, well my mother is. My dad... well he's a whole different story... a real piece of work. I could write reams and reams on that guy on what he's done, what he continues to do and all the time he claims he's the innocent victim in everything, as i said, a piece of work. When my parents separated that time, he bugged me and my sister on the phone so often that my normally mild mannered husband told him to back the hell off or face not seeing his grandchildren again. It worked. He stayed out of my face.

My dad was a bully during my growing up fragile teen years. Told me i'd never amount to anything, that i was basically useless and as a result i have extremely poor self esteem. If it weren't for my husband, i don't know where i'd be today, cliched as it may seem. But now that i'm married with kids of my own, it's like he has amnesia about it all, concocting all these stories about our supposedly blissful childhood that never happened. He used to intimidate the hell out of me, but no more. I tell him now exactly what i think of him and i pull absolutely no punches.

When we were kids, (i have two younger siblings), he made our lives hell, i mean, a living hell and my mother did nothing to stop it. She was intimidated too, and i think she thought that we still needed an entire family, not a single parent family. She used to take his crap and that used to make me mad. If my husband treated me the same way as my dad treated us, there'd be no way i'd stick around. I know we would've coped with just our mum raising us. I look at her now, we've all moved out with lives of our own, and she's so unhappy. My dad thinks there's nothing really wrong, but it's written all over her face. Sometimes my dad complains to me that my mum works too hard, that she doesn't talk to him and i feel like telling him to talk to her, not me about it, instead i tell him, i'm just not interested anymore. I'm past caring. I literally do not care what happens to that marriage anymore, they're not happy, or at least my mum isn't happy, they won't do anything about it so i am past caring what happens to them.

Weeeelll, that was a ramble and a half wasn't it? 😉

Signing off now before i make everyone else depressed 😀
 
Yep redslayer, you're right, but what i meant is that even if you can divorce when you're married in church, church see divorce as a fault, something wrong, whereas they shouldn't.
That's what I meant, but however you're right.
 
Originally posted by Frenchy Faith
Yep redslayer, you're right, but what i meant is that even if you can divorce when you're married in church, church see divorce as a fault, something wrong, whereas they shouldn't.
That's what I meant, but however you're right.

Oh sorry I totally misunderstood! Got you now though! 🙂
 
Originally posted by spiked_by_james
Well divorce is really something that should be avoided at all costs, especially if there are children. Nevertheless, it's better to have two happy parents apart from each other, as long as they spend as much time with their kids as possible, instead of two people hating each other and affecting the whole family dynamics.

I totally agree.

Ninjalizer, my parents got divorced when I was five too...my point? There isn't one. Just thought I'd mention it. But I don't remember my parents together. And I don't mean that I don't remember that far back. I just never saw them be loving toward one another. I'm sad they aren't together but I know it was best. They faught a lot. It would have screwed me up more if I had to live with them always yelling over me. They are great friends now. Sometimes it is better for two people to seperate. I do agree that a lot of people don't take marriage seriously enough and that they use divorce as an easy out and that's incredibly sad but I also think that people change and things change and they don't always change together. Sometimes you can't fix what's broken. My mom's side of the family is full of divorce. My mom has been married 4 times, my grandma 3 times my aunt twice...I'm on number one and I hope it's the only one. I will try everything before I ever give up. For my kids and for myself.
 
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