Do women date men that are less attractive than them?

Carrie Hopewell

Carrie Hopewell

Little girl lost in the woods
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I know it's silly, but has anyone noticed how women date men that aren't as attractive as they are? Eliza Dushku is engaged to someone older and very average looking. Female celebrities often date very average looking men, while average looking men date more beautiful women. And this isn't about money or anything. We're talking about people who date for love. It happens in real life too.

Is there like a scientific explanation? Does this have to do with our beauty standards? Good looking men need to fit a tight criteria in order to be considered good looking (they have to be muscular, tall, have a sharp bone structure) but women can be considered attractive for many reasons (skinny or curvy, cute or gorgeous, tall or short). Or maybe women have more limited options...
 
Yes, they do, because once you've dated a few "hot guys" you realize it's not about looks but about with whom you're comfortable and genuinely want to spend time/get along with 😉 (Not saying men can't come to those conclusions as well)

As for a scientific explanation, I'll just make an assumption that it is chemical rather than visual. That you're just naturally drawn (primary element) to some people, and that they become visually attractive to you (secondary element), and a certain percentage of those people you will be very compatible with (but not all).
 
Don't know what you mean.... 😛

Seems to happen quite a lot in the Celebrity world......not so sure about us common folk. I can't say I know of many examples in the people I mix with......
 
I'm sure someone will have had a go at a scientific study but I'd be surprised if there was any clear reason. Off the top of my head I would suggest that they prioritise other qualities in a partner above looks and that everyone's version of attractive is different.
 
Last Watcher said:
Seems to happen quite a lot in the Celebrity world......not so sure about us common folk. I can't say I know of many examples in the people I mix with......
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Does that mean you don't know a lot of attractive women, or that you know a lot of attractive men? 😀 😛
 
Taake said:
Does that mean you don't know a lot of attractive women, or that you know a lot of attractive men? 😀 😛
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😱 I claim the 5th on that one....just in case anyone I know is reading this........ 😉

But in my experience, out of most of the folk I know, the good looking Women seem to be with the better looking guys.....
The not so blessed in the looks department seem to pair up on shared interests or just because they got to know each other through working together.....
 
Women (me) don't date men 😛

But I just have a question. If hot women date the less attractive guys, who dates the hot guys?
 
I have heard many women--none that I'm particularly close to, mind you--say they won't date a guy "prettier" (or even more concerned with his looks) than her.

OTOH, good looks gives many guys a pass they otherwise wouldn't (and women, too). And lots of women are into Justin Beiber (including some much older than him).

If you want to explore why looks aren't as important, however...it's a bit too early for me, but maybe you'd prefer a very brief answer to my droning on...generally speaking, women are valued for their beauty (this includes women as well, btw), while men have many more areas which make them desirable so they have more options. If you don't know what I mean (or if it's just too early for me to make sense yet) then I'll explain this in more detail later.
 
I think it's because most woman have different standards that make men attractive to them. For example, I happen to find John Oliver sexy AF, even though he's not conventionally good looking. Brains and humor are very attractive , it's no surprise to see average looking comedians dating hot women. Yes, of course there are a lot of shallow women who will only date "gorgeous " men, but by and large and I think women have more diverse standards than men do. A lot of men will date a perfect ten even she's a terrible human because of the sexual appeal and admiration he gets from other men. Not all men, so I hope the
Men here aren't offended!' 🙂 also, like some one said above, it also comes down to beauty in the eye of the beholder.
 
I am incredibly vain. I like beauty. Sadly, I usually cannot pick freely on the top shelf. Being with someone out of your own league will lead to insecurity, low self-esteem and sleepless night, though.

Sarah and Alyson both went for attractive men. No way Alexis is good enough for Alyson, but who is?

There are some examples of famous men with women that aren't considered that attractive. John&Yoko and Sid&Nancy spring to mind. I don't wanna name any more, because I don't like being mean 😛 I love you, Yoko! Your Hands is the best song on Milk and Honey.

If I were to venture a guess. Eliza has probably dated many hot guys. Getting a hot guy is probably easy for her. You tend to want the things that are harder to get. New guy likely has some special quality that Eliza has never had before.
Blaze said:
But I just have a question. If hot women date the less attractive guys, who dates the hot guys?
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This is the question to ask. When people say things like, men cheat more than women do, how do they add the numbers up?
GraceK said:
I happen to find John Oliver sexy AF
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I am not going to ask... 😵
 
HowiMetdaSlayer
HowiMetdaSlayer
never thought that Alexis was all that attractive myself
Carrie Hopewell said:
Attractive women? There are lots of us. But I see your point. I didn't mean hot women though. I meant all women.
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In this case are you saying that all women are more attractive than guys (I agree 😛)? Because in order for a hot guy to find a date, the women still needs to be hotter than him 😉 (I'm joking by the way, don't take my posts too seriously).
 
I don't see it. Around me I see couples of (what I consider) the same physical standard together. Once you throw money and fame into the mix things get skewed. The rich and famous are not a representatvie sample 🙂
 
As support for the OP's position, you can always cite Ric Ocasek (lead singer of The Cars) and Paulina Pozrikova or Billy Joel and Christie Brinkley. There are quite a few rock stars who date models. The main attraction for the models would be the money.
 
Just a short addition to this, which explains everything:

[youtube]
 
HowiMetdaSlayer
HowiMetdaSlayer
wondered how long it would take before someone linked Barney's Hot/Crazy scale ;)
Ethan Reigns said:
As support for the OP's position, you can always cite Ric Ocasek (lead singer of The Cars) and Paulina Pozrikova or Billy Joel and Christie Brinkley. There are quite a few rock stars who date models. The main attraction for the models would be the money.
 
Just a short addition to this, which explains everything:

[youtube]
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Gotta love that mysoginistic transphobic view of things.
 
I didn't think Eliza's fiance was unattractive?! 😕

I think human attraction is very interesting. I mean I'm recently quoted as saying I find funny, posh men attractive based on the number of comedians I find attractive because of their sense of humour, but I probably would never have chatted them up in a bar (I don't do chat-ups - men come to Athena directly 😉)
Taake said:
Yes, they do, because once you've dated a few "hot guys" you realize it's not about looks but about with whom you're comfortable and genuinely want to spend time/get along with 😉 (Not saying men can't come to those conclusions as well)

As for a scientific explanation, I'll just make an assumption that it is chemical rather than visual. That you're just naturally drawn (primary element) to some people, and that they become visually attractive to you (secondary element), and a certain percentage of those people you will be very compatible with (but not all).
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I definitely agree with "once you've dated a hot guy you realise hotness isn't all that". I dated such a hot guy back in my early 20s, he was smokin' hot (and he knew it!) so he was inevitably a bit of a player and he soon dumped me when someone prettier came along. I was heartbroken but I saw him on FB recently and he's actually not all that in the looks department anymore. 😉

I guess if you compare it to most of the animal kingdom, the men parade round and show off their looks/skills to attract the females. It's not all that different for humans I guess. Plus generally women are better looking than guys. I mean compare a naked female body to a naked man's body - women are just better looking and more aesthetically pleasing 😉
 
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