HA! I love all of y'all's, they made me laugh. But my absolute FAVORITE pick up line ever, is only funny because it failed. It failed spectacularly.
My b/f plays for his college's rugby club. The Men's Rugby Club (not that there's a women's rugby club, grumble grumble) is FAMOUS or perhaps infamous for their parties. (I'd never seen three guys do beer bongs off the side of a porch before I went to a Rugby party!) So on one of my visits down here, we went to a Rugby party. It was tons of fun, until I started feeling a little light-headed (boy, those guys love their cigars) and Jim was in the middle of a poker game. So I went outside onto the porch, just to cool down a little and get some air. And this guy (very hot, btw, but stupidly drunk) kind of staggers over and goes "Hey, don't I know you?" I'm like "I don't think so" and he goes "No, yeah I do. You're Touchdown's girlfriend!" (Touchdown is my b/f's nickname. Has nothing to do with football. Don't ask!) I'm like, "Well, yeah." And he starts laughing and goes "Girl, you need to ditch Touchdown. I'll tell you what, let me get you a drink, and then we can go upstairs" I just looked at him like "What are you nuts?" At that point he leans over the railing of the porch and vomits. I hear a girl scream "Holy f*** those are my new Jimmy Choos!" I started laughing my butt off. First off, never wear nice shoes to a rugby party. Secondly, don't stand directly by the porch at any party. You never know what's gonna come over that railing!
I also enjoy "If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put 'I' next to 'U'." Just dumb.