Family

[definition of insane]

I realised after a couple of emails going back and forth between my dad and I that even 16,000km away, he's still got that ability to make me cringe by trying to word some sort of life lesson that I don't understand or him taking something I've said in the wrong context.

Don't get me wrong, most of the time I get along famously with my dad. Oddly enough it's getting better either the older I get, or the further I move away. I love him to death, but I think I've reached the conclusion there's always going to be something that we get on each other's nerves about. For me, it's the philisophical life talks....I appreciate that what he's trying to tell me, but it never fails to make me prickly...like I get the feeling he thinks I can't work it out on my own.

So I guess I'm curious and having one of those moments...what do you love about your family members? What drives you completely mental about them? Do you think you'll ever just always get along and get over it and the like or is it all just a part of the family experience?

 

[Blondie Bear]

I think it's part of the family thing. I haven't spoken to my father since I moved (7 years ago)--or, not really. He tracked me down on Facebook and Myspace (so weird), so there's been notes and stuff, but not actual talking. He's a chauvinistic, misogynistic, self-centered ass and NOT someone I would hang out with even if he WASN'T my father. I actually get along much better with my father-in-law. My mom and I used to have screaming fights, but now that I've moved, we get along much better. I don't talk to her a whole lot, either, but I don't actively avoid her like I do my dad. My sister and I didn't get along until I was about 19, and now we get along famously, talk at least once a week, and miss each other like crazy. And my brother is just like my dad, and I haven't talked to him in years, either.

So, yeah, I think it's just a family thing.

 

[Relic]

My parents and I both get along great...here is the kicker, they only live a short distance away and I see them regularly! I'm sure they have complaints about me, but when it comes to them...... my main gripe with my Dad would be he has likely forgotten more about mechanical stuff than I will ever know. The man is brilliant; and me, not so much. He doesn't talk down to me, but he doesn't explain things either. I guess I am just suppose to know them.

When I ask him what he's talking about on a project I get either a confusing explanation or he plays the "I'm deaf and can not hear" you card. My Mom worries about me all the time, which I am learning is just something parents do and probably don't outgrow. She also favors my Son somewhat over my Daughter (he's like my freaking clone) She knows she does this and tries to compensate for it and that makes it even more obvious. (Thankfully my daughter is 'Grandpa's girl' so the favortism is equally spread.)

I can't complain at all really. My parents are both loving, kind, people who have gone out of their way to help me make something of myself and are always willing to help out. I just wish my dad and I had more things in common besides just our love for oneanother. (he likes nascar, I like Buffy. He likes baseball, I hate it. He likes the Chicago Bears I love the detroit lions....see, even on some of the things we do enjoy like football, it's still different.)

I'm lucky my gripes are all minor.

My Wife and I, as far as I know, don't have any issues that upset us too much, just trivial BS like me always forgetting to put clothes in the dryer (and ruining clothes, or at the very least making her dresses have to be rewashed) and her pilling unrinsed dishes up in the sink on the side that has no disposal, so I get to fish food out of the drain. (yuck)

We both conceed that we are definately worth the trouble 🙂 . We're lucky that way.

My kids....well there my kids. I have no complaints there.

My sister...I wish I saw her more often.

 

[Washburne]

Ah, family. Nowdays I get along fine with my parents and I love my sisters. Has it always been that way? Noooooooo.

My sisters are 9 years apart and I´m the middle child (3 years younger than the oldest sister). So I was the annoying babybrother that always wanted to follow my sister around. Luckily for her, her friends had sibling my age so quite often I ended up with them instead. I´m sure not enough if you ask my sister about it though. And if it wasn´t enough to get a babysister (guess who became the "forgotten" one as a middlechild?) she was also handicapped. Not that I was jealous of her for that or anything. But it meant she needed even more attention. So I got more forgotten. She followed me everythere as long as I was in the house or garden. Be able to read a book? Well, if I read it to her maybe. I was never alone!!! I guess that´s partly why I mostly don´t mind the quiet time nowdays.


My bigsister fought most of her teenage years with our parents with bad results so I ended up keeping all my emotions and aggressions inside. Yep, that was a real bad choice. But I´m getting better (to just use the word better considering my age is depressing) at finding ways to get my aggression out now. But to this day I hate to fight" or arguee too loudly. Yes I´m a wimp.


The biggest family "problem" is the lack of being able to show (the good kind of) emotions. Doubt that any children in in our family the last century has actually heard the phrase "I love you" growing up. We do try to show it, not that we´re the best at it. If our family ever had a family motto it must have been "Emotions = bad". Somehow my sisters seem to be better at it than any familymember I´ve ever known. And that makes me happy. Me? I´m still worthless at it in real life.


My parents do try to help in any way they can. And after the moving away from home our relationship has grown better for every year. So I´m not complaining too much, even though my mother still to this day can make me feel like a 3-year old that has done something terrible wrong. And my sisters? Doubt I could love them more (but am I able to tell them?) even though I´m much closer to the older one.


Now why can´t I ever keep things short? And did I have a point with all this?

 

[InsaneMystic]

I moved out 7 1/2 years ago, and declared the family ties broken half a year later (on the-woman-who-bore-me's birthday - talk about unusual presents ::change:: ). Since that time, I'm on "phonecalls and cards for birthdays, Christmas and when someone dies" terms with my former clan, but we get along on this very limited contact level (kind of loose-aquaintance-ish) MUCH better than ever before. I guess you get an idea how not-good it was earlier (and truth be told, you're probably underestimating it still - around 16 it was literally hell).

But I'm impressed how much they respect my choice to break the family ties - e.g., on the birthday/Xmas cards, since 2001 it never says "mum" anymore, she signs with her name. I can't help but give her kudos for that.

 

[Aethra]

I'm moving in 22 days, and I can't describe to you how much I cannot WAIT to get out. I do love my family. My parents have always been wonderful to me. We've of course had our screaming matches, but I know I have it pretty good here. But really. It's time for me to go.

My extended family is spread out all over the country, with concentrations in certain areas. The closest relatives I have are my sisters; one is 45 minutes away by car, and the other is three hours. If I want to see my grandparents, it's a six hour ride, which I'm doing next weekend, and it'll just be me and my mom, in a car, for six hours straight. And then two days later again, to come home. That's always... not fun. But I love getting to see my family, because I can only afford to go down maybe three times a year these days, because I work so much.

There's also always been an issue with my paents. They're old. Like, pushing 60. So they're rather old-fashioned about a lot of things. If my mom and I are joking around and I say "god mom, you're so stupid!" she gets OFFENDED. "What a horrible thing to say to your mother!" and she gets all hurt. Whereas I call my friends much worse stuff and it turns into an insult fiesta. Plus, I have sisters who are little less than twice my age, so they never lived with me. So they never really got to experience my mom. Well, they lived with us for like, a summer.

So my mom's ALREADY missing me, and I still have three weeks here. She's telling me I have to call her EVERY DAY, and I'm like... no. I'll be far to busy for that. Does YOUR mom call you every day? No! *sigh* My dad is rather indifferent so far. I mean, they hardly see me now anyways. I'm working, out with friends, or in my room. So he'll miss me, but he wont' be all weepy about it like mom is.
And what's WORSE, my mom is going to be LOOPY when I'm moving into the dorm. Like, up in vikadinland. Uncle's gonna yank a tooth or something the night before. 🙁

 

[palabravampiress]

Umm... my family is awesome. We get along very well -- and I'm talking about both my family of origin and my in-laws. My hubby and I have a great time whenever we go back for a visit or whenever someone comes to visit us. Of course, there are some tendencies or situations that I find annoying. That's just part of the family experience. Overall, though, I think my family life is about as happy as possible. I honestly wish we all lived in the same town again so that I could see them more often.

 

[white avenger]

When I was little, my dad was a truck driver, so he was gone a lot, and there was just my mother and me. We would go to the movies, mostly westerns, because even then I loved horses, or just about anything that had horses or dogs in them, and of course the romances that she loved, things that starred people like Victor Mature, Robert Taylor, Alan Ladd, Clark Gable...all of the giants of the day.

When my dad was home, he would take me out into the country with the old .22 rifle that I still have, and we would shoot tin cans, or the pine cones off of trees. He taught me how to make wooden whistles, sharpen knives, crack a bull whip, and tie about a dozen different knots and when each one was appropriate.

 

[Buffanator]

Everybody's got their family freaks, I always say. 😉

I get along with my dad & my dad's family way better than I do with my mom or her family. I've always been very close to Daddy's family - aunts, cousins, etc, while I mostly never cared for Mom's family.

My parents are divorced, & both are in their 70's now. While Mom complains incessantly about everything, especially her health, Daddy takes the "oh well, get'n old's a bitch" attitude. Mom has a bad habit of "talking without tact" & she comes across as a know-it-all fussy-ass, but she's really just concerned. She reads A LOT, & therefore thinks she DOES know it all, LOL. She doesn't get out much, and therefore tends to talk you to death when you do talk to her. 🙄 AND of course she has that "you never come to see me" guilt-trippy stuff. Bleh.

Daddy on the other hand, is quite sociable, but very forgetful, & will tell me the same thing over & over & over. He also is getting bad about leaving on the lights, or the stove, or the front door open, etc. Scary stuff.

I love my parents, but I can't take being around either of them for long periods of time. I usually see them about twice a year, as there is a 5 hour difference between us. And one of my uncles always said: "The farther apart you live from your family, the better along you'll get with them." 😉

Of course now that they're getting on up in years, it's more difficult... the older a parent gets, the more, it seems, they become like a child. :sigh: And it's hard seeing them that way.

 

[Bluebird]

I still live with my parents and my little sister, who's 21, but it doesn't feel like I live with 'parents' if you get what I mean. My mum and dad were 20 years old when they had me so the average age in my house is around 32, hehe. Growing up in my house there was no strict rules, my mum and dad were old-scool punks with mohicans and everything.:biggrin: Sometimes it feels like they're the kids of the family and I have to tell them off for listening to music too late at night or having parties.:lmao: It's like living in a student house with people coming and going at all times of the day and night. But I wouldn't have it any other way.🙂

Now as people, I definately get along with my dad a lot more. I live with him so I see him everyday and it's like living with a good friend. We have a million things in common and also have the same sense of humour - he's so immature! He's the person I go to when I have a serious problem or I just want to have a dumb chat. He's gives the best advice. He's the person I look up to the most. He's the coolest person I know. He's fills me with such ambition and confidence and I love him so much I wouldn't know what to do without him. In January this year he had a heart attack, he's good now, but that was the worst feeling ever. I would be so lost without him. Now, I'm just trying to get him to stop smoking. grr! It's difficult! LOL

Aaanyways, that's that.

 

[InLoveWithBuffy]

My family....I hate that word, but anyway. My family is me, other me, my sister, my another sister, my dad, my aunt and my mom.

Me: I'm antisocial girl who is gay. She hates almost every human on world, because humans are patchetic. She is delusional and mentally sick, but other than that, she can be caring and loyal too. She loves music, and girls and TK.


Other me: She's social, evil, ruthless bitch. She want's to end whole world just because it would be fun. She isn't 100% gay and she thinks things with different way than i do........ TK knows very well, what kind of person she is.

My sister: My whole world, she has always been my best friend, she has always took care of me so i won't kill myself. She's so cute and caring, looks just like me, only 10years older.


My other sister: I'm not in speaking terms with her, she doesn't accept my gayness and some other things, haven't talked with her in 4years, i don't know where she is nowdays

My Aunt: Cool woman with awesome sense of humor. One of few people who keep me as adult, luckily

My 'dad': I hate this dude, i really do. If i could, i would rip his head off, shame that i can't


My mom: Person who always cared about me, even after her death, she still talks to me. Person who helped me always when i were in bad mood or in trouble. Best mom ever, just like joyce

 

[Blondie Bear]

^ I was going to karmify you, but karmified you last.

You made me get all teary! *sniffle* I hate that your life is like that.

 

[SC7 Fan]

I love my mum, I hate my dad. When my dad first moved out all I wanted was him to come back and live with us, now he's back all I want is him to move out again.

My little sister is a complete brat. My little brother is a brat but not as much as my sister.

My aunt; where to start? I love my aunt! She is probably the best person in the world. She likes Buffy and Angel, She buys me really cool clothes and has bought most of my Buffy stuff. She basically spoils me.

My Nan and Grandad spoil me too although my nan keeps nagging at me and it really annoys me.

 

[Tueuse de Vampires]

I always got on pretty well with both my parents. Of course there was the usual teenage ´drama stuff, butother than that...also I always got along great wiht my brother.
Now that I've moved out it's not looking too good though. We harldy ever speak (mainly because I don't visit (it's just so much fun around here!) and can't call witht eh phone here (it only receives calls, can't call yourslef) and they always just remind me of studying and what I have to do. Well, Saturday I'm gonna go to Germany for a week, so let's see how that goes.

 

[LorneyTunes]

Well my mum died 4 years ago my family was shattered , but we all go through it together which was great for me because am the only girl in the house kinda sucked big time x

My Mum even though shes not here I still talk to her and talk about her everyday, I miss her x

My brothers I love all three of them all so different but they all have big hearts.

My nephews for being cute and into star wars , dr who and Batman x

My Niece because she is her own person now its scarey but
great x

My Dad for getting my through the bad times and the good times x

My Auntie Mary because shes my second mum kinda x

Bluebird who is what I consider my Family I have known her for half of my life, I don't know what I would do without her x

Things that annoy me about them

They are always late for everything I hate that!!

My Dad goes through my stuff in my room, he wakes me up when I tell him not too, he shouts down the phone even when hes not outside. He starts to argue with me when hes been drinking I think thats when he misses my mum x



My brothers for always tickeling me when i was younger I hate being tickeled, for not cleaning the dishes, for scratching all my dvds . Also taking pictures of me when am crying why do they do this ? Putting things up high on shelfs that I cannot reach grr argh !

My sister's in law for causing our family pain when we are
greiving x

Bluebird for always being late but without that she wouldn't be her , and we are both very stubborn which can be funny and frustrating lol x

 

[Blackloliita]

Family... You don't choose them yourself, a 😛?
Ok they aren't that worse though, I have got a lot of support in things that I do.

My mum: mmmh... she's funny person. But I think she's in her midlifecrisis (is that possible with women?). She wants to lose weight all time (while she has actually nice figure for women of her age, 44) and she bought a pull that I also have. The thing she'll always do, and that's really annoying to me, is being overcared. I need to be home before the dark and all that. Oh and than you also have the privacypart. She just walks in the bathroom while I'm in it. I mean no wonder I start to scream to her than. But than I get those things as "You hit on my heart", "You come out of me" (this one I really hate), "You have normal body", ... I first thought this was weird that she just comes into bathroom. But I also hear my friends complaining about stuff like that, so no worries, though I still DON'T like it.

My dad: one really great thing about him, he respects my privacy, though he also says sometimes things like (to my mother) "if she has boyfriend, she won't come to tell us". But the bathroomthing is totally no problem with him, happily. But I don't like his sense of humor, and sometimes I really get annoyed of it.

My brother: ok, I sometimes say he's annoying and all that, but I mean I have too, he's my brother. But actually he's very kind and sweet and all that. But it also comes 'cause he's bit others than other children, he goes to special school, though he has normal outside, but he just has problems with social contact & learning things. My mum still has problems with a bit that they didn't accept him in "normal" school. I don't really have problems with this fact. Though it's sometimes hard, when other children tease him (in bad way) I don't know what I need to do, I mean I want to defend my little brother of course, but on the other side it's weird how he acts sometimes but it's too hard to explain that to children of my brother his age, they wouldn't understand he has these kind of problems.

There's one thing yet I don't really like about them, that's the fact they are sometimes old in comparing with my classmates' parents, my mum = 44 & my dad = 54...

But even after all, I need to convince I would miss them if I'd lose them.
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Edit:
[br][/br]
Oh and than I didn't speak about the musicthing yet. My mum has this idea of me that I'm abnormal 'cause I don't listen to the music where most children of my age listen to (and where she listens to). And when I put it on it's immediatley that it's baaad music and all that, sometimes just to tease, but sometimes also serious.

 

[Mesektet Ra]

My mom is pretty much the coolest mom in the whole world. She's one of my best friends. I can talk about anything with her - and I'm not just saying that. My mother and I have a very, very different relationship than most mothers and daughters. Think of the most disgusting, of personal, thing that you'd never want to talk about with with your mother - my mom and I have extended discussions about it. Seriously.

The downside to this scenario is the fact that sometimes I feel like our roles are reversed - instead of my mom putting me to bed because I've had too much to drink, it's me picking her up from the bar and making sure she gets to sleep so she can go to work in the morning. Some nights I'll stay awake just to make sure she gets up for work on time. Right now is a perfect example - she's washing the carpets, but only because I told her to, because I was sick of seeing spots all over the carpet.

I don't want to give you the impression that my mom is irresponsible or flighty or whatever - she's in her fifties. She works two jobs to keep us fed and clothed and roof over our heads. But still...sometimes I feel like I'm the parent and she's the child.

My dad passed away three years ago. I'd like to be nice and say it was complications due to alcoholism, but in reality it was pretty much an accidental suicide, if that makes any sense. My dad and I didn't really get along all that well, even when he was sober. When he drank it was on and off, but he was always pious and negative about everything I did. Nothing was ever really that good enough. I miss my dad like hell, and I still love him with all my heart. But I have a tendency to be more realistic about matters.

My sister...well, she's a mess all over the place. Her and I...well, we're very, very different people. Not to blow smoke up my ass or anything, but my sister is an idiot and I have a tendency to...I dunno, READ. She doesn't exactly make well-informed decisions and she really doesn't give a crap about anybody she could be hurting in the process. She treats my mother like dirt. She tries to call me and talk to me and be all BFF, but she knows where I stand with her. We don't exactly...get along.

My brother and my sister-in-law are both good people. Matt helps take care of the house and stuff and Caitlin's one of my best friends. She's around when no one else is. Matt's adopted, and I feel like Matt and Caitlin are both more my real family than my real sister.

That's...pretty much it, I guess. Other than the occasional blow-up fight between everyone living here, everything is pretty boring.

 

[Lou]

We have an amusing family.....
Mom and Dad live right down the street. We all go over there every Thursday night for dinner and TV watching. We've done it ever since Survivor started 8 years ago. It's fun.

I adore my Dad. My Mom is pretty cool too, although she has some personal issues where she thinks we hate her sometimes and she's quite forgetful, so it makes for amusing conversations sometimes.

I love my little brother. He's a hoot. Sarcastic and rude, but still very sweet and defensive when he's supposed to be. We get along very nicely.

My sister is the biggest problem but mostly because I worry about her. She seems very insecure and makes some oddball decisions. And she seems to have a weird attachment to me and my life. It's almost like a weird love/hate thing. Part of the time she seems dying to be a major part of my life and will move heaven and earth to be with me and then other times, I get the feeling that she'd secretly like it if everything fell apart.
But, I don't think she's really aware of all of this. I think she could use some in depth therapy. And her daughter is ending up a lot like her, which is scary.
Since they've moved back into town, things have been more strained. I try very hard to just keep things civil at times and then at others, I really wish we could be closer, but doing that always seems to devolve into a mess.

I'm VERY close with my aunt in California (Dad's sister) we're like best friends. I want her to move here, but she's kind of scared of my sister too.
My family and I are MUCH closer since we had the kids though. It was nice to not have to talk to people and recount my whole life to them. At least my family understands my quirks!

 

[Schillaci]

Think of the most disgusting, of personal, thing that you'd never want to talk about with with your mother - my mom and I have extended discussions about it. Seriously.

Having sexual relations with a family member. 'Saying to your mother, ever thought about going gay.. for me?'
HA! bet you never talk about that little miss meandmymumtalkabouteverything. Reply to that with 'actually, we discussed that back in 2006' then you pack your bags little missy, you've just bagged a fiance!

I have two brothers, two sisters, a mother who I sometimes joke is dead by saying 'god rest her soul' and then explain that its a request and a father who I spent most of my childhood at loggerheads with. My dad is quite old fashioned, and has some real strange 'quirks' which I somehow now have.

Pretty much if you take everything everybody has posted so far, from the 'I love my god-fearing saintly family, they are my world' to the ' I hate them all, the sadistic alcoholic junkies', kick it around a bit, add some sauce, you'll pretty much have the description of my relationship with my family.

I gave my parents a hard time growing up, and they weren't easy on me either. I do regret some of the things I put them through. I did have a big chip on my shoulder about some of the things they did, and how that affected me, but I came to realise I can't just focus on the mistakes they made, I've also got to appreciate that lots of the good virtues I have, came from them.

What I'm about to say doesn't mean that I think my parents were bad parents. Compared to what a lot of my friends had as parents, I was damn lucky. I don't think my parents were particularly good parents, at parenting, but they are good people, and that more than makes up for mistakes they may have made.


This is turning into another one of those infamous Schillaci posts, intending to be 20 words long, its turning into a short story.

I've been meaning to tell a story about my sister that happened recently, now would be the ideal post as its about family but I don't want to turn this into another marathon.

Maybe another day if this topic gets more replies. Or maybe I'll start a new topic, 'family stories' lol. actually I wouldn't know which ones to tell.

God! fingers, stop typing..

..

I see you! Get away from that keyboard at once!

 

[JenniferAlice]

My family consists of my parents and my big sister and my best friend Sharlene. I live with my parent and my older sister (bluebird). We all are a bit mental so it can be a struggle at times, but I think they're all great anyway, CHEEESE. My best friend is like part of the family, but she doesn't live in Glasgow anymore, still talk to her all the time though. My parents were never strict while I was growing up, I was mad when I was young and they took it pretty well. They were punks in the 70s when they were growing up so they are very broad-minded, I think they're beautiful, honestly, the most beautiful couple in the world. They've always got my back, I've had a bit of a hard time lately, I split with my boyfriend of 5 years and went mental , overdosed etc, and they've helped me alot. My big sister doesn't say much, but I know she's always there for me, and if anyone ever gave her a hard time, I'd smash they're teeth in without even thinking about it. All families are psychotic, everyones got a family, they'll always be there for you, whether you like it or not.