As a supporter of the Spuffy ship (may her banners proudly flt!) I have to say that I am happy with the way that the Bangel/Spuffy question was left unresolved at the end of the series. There was something hopeful for both ships.
Yes, Buffy DOES sometimes think about that "happily ever after" time, somewhere in the distant future, but she never actually says that she only sees it being with Angel, despite what he or anyone else might have interpreted that conversation as meaning.
And, she's not ready for Spike to not be there, but she still leaves him o die in the hellmouth. She DOESN'T love Spike, but he IS "in her heart," whatever the heck that means, but at the end, she DOES love him, and says so. It's not her fault that she hasn't been able to convince him (or is he just denying it in order to make it easier for her to leave him there to die?)
She will never love anyone as much as she lovED (Past tense. Does that mean that she doesn't love him that much anymore?) and she's angry that everyone believes that she's STILL in love with Spike (does that mean that she once actually was, and maybe still is, but is just unwilling to admit it?)
She wants to "bask" in Angel's presence, but names Spike as her Champion (Is that because she sees Spike as the more heroic of the two vampires, or becaus she wants to send her beloved Angel out of harm's way, and Spike is only a substitute for her REAL Champion?)
No one can deny the passion between Buffy and Angel in that final kiss, but no one can HELP but speculate on what happened there in the basement with Spike after that last "fade to black" scene.
And other subtle and not so subtle hints, references, and questions left unanswered.
No real closure, no real final choice. No, "I love you, but he will always be the one who I'm IN LOVE with."
As far as we knew at that time, we would never see Buffy with either vampire again, but we were all, Spuffies and Bangels alike, SURE that there would one day be a reunion for our own special pair, and everything would all work out in the end. By leaving the question unanswered, Joss left both groups hopeful, and I have no doubt whatsoever that he did that on purpose, whether to leave hope for all, or merely to torture both ships.
