How was your day? - Part 5

[November]

I am starting to wonder if all those boots to the stomach actually did do internal damage. My belly sounds like an flat orchestra warming up.

Usually I sleep more around a new moon, but not this month! I really wana get out to one of the lakes this week. Hoping the salt will help rebalance me. Honestly thankful to be gaining more awareness of these migraines now, still incapacitating but not always severe. There are definite patterns, and I'm confident I will figure them out. The moon connection is kinda fun tbh. It works well with lunar gardening 😛

 

[Nix]

Well my day is only just beginning. So far I've done the get Abbs to school thing, called the school cause the bus was late, done the washing up, tidied the living room, arranged a few things for a big girlie Christmas meal out I'm planning and now I'm waiting for the solar workmen and my shopping delivery! Thats way too much to be doing before 11am!!

 

[November]

@HowiMetdaSlayer why were you getting kicked in the tummy?

Horses, men, large children with autism... It'd need a thread of its own to list them all. Really not interesting enough for that 😛 Those nurses with tummy needles wernt gentle either! Solitude suits me 😀

The usual today, gardening, walkies with wildflowers, library, meditation, vacuuming bunny hair and then cuddling bunnies, which left a fresh layer of bunny hair on the carpet...

I have vistors in the morning, so obviously Im getting little sleep tonight.

Worried about my Xander bunny too. He has had bad poos and a sore ear. He seemed happier after carrots for dinner. Dug around in the fresh litter box, making a mess after my cleaning attempt. Having a boy bunny blast.

 

[Anyanka Bunny Slayer]

I've actually been making a lot of progress with my book. Since my mind is so skittish and all over the place, it's difficult to just sit down and focus; but I'm doing it. My gift has always been writing, and all the crazy, impossible things I've experienced in my life might have a purpose. If sharing it with the public can actually help someone, that's a good thing. The overdoses, the encounters with law enforcement...and especially the involuntary psychiatric stays. If you've ever been an unwilling guest in a psych unit, you'll know what I'm talking about. With me, it was always a case of, "If she took all those pills, it must've been a suicide attempt." But no, I was just trying to get high. Waking up in a strait jacket can really ruin your day, by the way. On the positive side, we got to make some really cool art stuff. 😂 And actually, there were some fun times in there! You just had to avoid the people who were drooling on themselves and screaming at the water fountain. It's unfortunate that mental health financing was drastically cut awhile back...and most hospitals closed their smoking areas, which really sucked. Yes, I can remember the fun times; but that was ten years ago. I've managed to avoid the whole 5150 thing for quite awhile, and that's good. We'll just forget that ativan overdose in May 2016. Ooops! 😛

Anyway, as I was leaving a Ralphs parking lot earlier, my car decided it that would be simply hilarious to stall in the middle of a VERY busy street. Oh. Crap. Right when I turned onto La Brea...and the driver's side of my car was facing oncoming traffic. Of course, you have the idiots who are honking at me; I was petrified for about five seconds, because there were at least ten cars coming at me. And I'm like, "My car stalled, what do you want me to do?!" Luckily, I got it started within a couple of minutes! God, I was cursing up a storm. F**king car!! I hate driving in LA, it's just retarded. I'm really thinking about going back to using the bus and Lyft. I just don't have the temperment to deal with the traffic here. And while I don't condone people shooting at others drivers, I seriously understand it. 😈

I was just thinking...when I was 16 and 17, I was dating guys who were 32. Can you imagine how that would be viewed these days? My parents were okay with it, as long as they could meet the guy:

Dad: "So, what are you two going to do this evening?"
Me: "Well...um...going to the Cheesecake Factory or something." Yeah, so many lies. More like Motel 6 with a six pack and some weed. 😊 Hey, do any of you LA people remember the Pleasure Chest in West Hollywood? 👀

 

[November]

The world is guna look back on involuntary inpatient treatment and cringe. While other inmates were not ALL bad, the evil psychiatrists are. The experience is scarring. In my case, brain injuring. SO many people have told me to write a book too, but I figure, no one cared in real life, family deemed that I deserve it, and I'm certainly not ready to pick at those scabs yet. #freesince2015

Goodluck with it 😀 our lives are different to other peoples 😉 Other people NEED to know, perhaps it will stop them doing it, make the medics rethink mental "ill" health (hopeful, but doubtful). I feel much safer now that I can meditate to the degree I can. If it ever happens again, I'll take a vow of silence and meditate the 72 hours away. Buffy fighting skills are also handy to hone. They tried to ban inpatient smoking here too, but its been unsuccessful. And nurses smoke more than patients do!

I woke up and my migraine is back 🙁 I thought it was residule, but then the nausea started :\ I text my visitors to cancel. Head isnt too bad really, I suspected I had over done it yesterday, I just dont want it to blow out to unbearable. I got too much to do!

I don't want to skip a day bushwalking with all the wonderful wildflowers in bloom.

 

[HowiMetdaSlayer]

Had a LONG day between class & work. Also hit the gym with friend after. So kind of tired. 😳

 

[Anyanka Bunny Slayer]

The world is guna look back on involuntary inpatient treatment and cringe. While other inmates were not ALL bad, the evil psychiatrists are. The experience is scarring. In my case, brain injuring. SO many people have told me to write a book too, but I figure, no one cared in real life, family deemed that I deserve it, and I'm certainly not ready to pick at those scabs yet. #freesince2015

Goodluck with it 😀 our lives are different to other peoples 😉 Other people NEED to know, perhaps it will stop them doing it, make the medics rethink mental "ill" health (hopeful, but doubtful). I feel much safer now that I can meditate to the degree I can. If it ever happens again, I'll take a vow of silence and meditate the 72 hours away. Buffy fighting skills are also handy to hone. They tried to ban inpatient smoking here too, but its been unsuccessful. And nurses smoke more than patients do!

I woke up and my migraine is back 🙁 I thought it was residule, but then the nausea started :\ I text my visitors to cancel. Head isnt too bad really, I suspected I had over done it yesterday, I just dont want it to blow out to unbearable. I got too much to do!

I don't want to skip a day bushwalking with all the wonderful wildflowers in bloom.

I've had an "indefinite" hold put on me before...and a 30 day hold as well. Basically because I was so confrontational...I would NOT take the heavy duty meds they tried to force on everyone. I had to call Patients Rights from a payphone. I prevailed, but was subjected to an Administrative Discharge...that's where you actually get kicked out of the psych unit. 😂

Though sometimes when I'm super stressed, I kind of miss those places. You're not expected to do anything, just lay around, take pills, eat, and socialise during smoke breaks. The food was REALLY good most of the time. Oooh, those little lemon cakes with icing on them!!! And I'll admit, some of us would grab people's desserts if they were asleep and didn't come to the dining room fast enough. If you snooze, you lose. 😃

 

[November]

I never miss them, even the private ones. I still see it as chemical torture, no matter how they dress it up.

The places I was at had forced daily group, which were more tedious than any job or school. I repeated them so much that I could recite the program for about 6 of the seperate groups and anticipate what the therapists were going to say. I got kicked out to art group with the droolers for being a smart arse.

One time I was drawing with 3 colours and the art therapist decided to give me a spiel about why I chose those colours to express my emotions. I replied, "umm no you daft f***, they were the only colours in reach". Calling a therapist names gets you a mouthful of xyprexa wafers. Especially when it sets other patients off into endless fits of giggles.

The last few admissions they didnt even bother to try and put me in groups. I kept nicking art supplies so I wouldnt get so bored after lunch. You're right about the food, it was fantastic and the only place I had consistant meals since I was 14.

It was odd to me, how many nurses tried to push me into a nursing career. Certified insane, and they thought me a good match to care for others?? It was only later, when I joined mental health forums that I realised just how many nurses are mentally ill themselves. And teachers. Start to wonder if the job does it, or if the job attracts it. Strange world.

I went walkies to the shops, spent too much money on blueberries and peanut butter. Hoping to nap now. A neighbour yelled out his car window to go see him later. I think I'll wander through the bush to his place at about 4.20.

 

[Anyanka Bunny Slayer]

Hey, I managed to get ahold of a new therapist's keys...the keys that unlocked the elevator. During group, I distracted the therapist, and snatched her keys which were on a table. And I almost escaped. But my roommate snitched...I wanted to PUNCH her in the face. They quickly moved her to another room. Bitch! Just think, I HAD the keys, I almost made it! Damn. So close, yet so far. 😢

 

[nightshade]

My day is not going well, even though it's a day off, realised that I have a UTI, so lots of water needing to be drunk, lots of rushing to the loo afterwards! Also got woken up in the night with painful leg cramp, so I'm mostly at home feeling sorry for myself, although I will go into town later as I need to go to the post office.

 

[ILLYRIAN]

My day just got a hole heap better after I read the posts by Amber Bunny Slippers, I remember when I was ordered to go to a nut house, I say nut house because it'd take to long to write the Psychiatric Hospital - oops.

I really had the quack doctors worried when I said of ghosts I'd met; at that time in my life I did a lot of ghost hunting, with them being big know-it-alls said I was deluded but I had the last laugh. To help my mind I took part in a meditation class, so I took part in the class and astral projected into another room, I was able to tell the nut house worker who was in the other room, what it was decided to do about what. I was sent home two days later.

Should have told the quacks about my contact with dark witches and demons. It was great fun to tell people what they did or will do, best is when you muck up a persons mind on purpose, once when a vicar said I was taking part in the Devils work, I told him about an experience I had in a séance, when finding if the spirit had spoken the truth. How the bound bible when thrown at a person curved in the air away from her. I told the vicar it may have been that the spirit had lied or it may have been that she was a Devil Worshipper. As I asked the vicar, was it a case of ' the devil protects his own '.

Now I am looking forward to the crap the day will bring.

 

[Anyanka Bunny Slayer]

Well, I spent an hour washing and waxing the car...it looks amazing. If it rains, I'm going to scream like a banshee, I swear to God.

I'm about to make some rice, broccoli, and cheese. With butter. I really, really love that! Kind of in a good mood because tomorrow is drug refill day.. So tomorrow evening (and the next couple of days) I'll be going on a trip without leaving the house. 😀 I never go online when I'm really wasted; mostly, I listen to music and mosh by myself. It's super fun. I just have to move things around and have a clear space, so I don't trip over something and fall on my face. It's so difficult to predict what's going to happen when you're stoned. One time, I woke up and found that ALL of my white towels were purple. I don't even remember dyeing them...and I don't remember going to the store to buy dye. 😂

I post here nearly every day, as you guys know. But whenever you don't see me for a few days, you'll know that I'm playing with chemicals. Anyway, when one is massively stoned, its difficult to work stuff like a phone or laptop. You just look at it, kind of like a caveman would. Like, "Huh. What is that thing? Oooh, pretty colours!" I don't recommend that you do this. It takes years of experimenting and it's a bit risky. 😨

God, rice with butter and cheese is SO yummy. And the broccoli!! 🐵🍴

 

[November]

Have a safe weekend 🙂

My car needs a wash, its usually white but right now it is orange from roadtrippin on dirt roads.

I am finally having a seat after chopping things in the garden. Chopping things is so fun! I am currently chopping the mixture of spring grasses that have come up. Im not strong enough to use the whipper snipper, plus worried I might collect a defenceless little lizard, so I use the hedge trimmers. Town already thinks i am nuts, I have no problem doing my dancy tai chi type moves braless in the front yard, snipping grass and weeds with hedge trimmers. It is very slow going, but I am hopeful its helping build up the muscles that wasted over winter. As soon as my mind wanders, is when I start to rush, and i can get a lot done in a rush, but i pay for it later! Slow and steady for me. My progress cant be counted in productivity. Its damaging for peeps like me.

Right now i am arguing with myself over buying a chicken burger. Odds are, that I'll end up at the pub later if I dont have lunch. I was vomiting most of the night cos the migraine is hanging on (but being bed bound is worse). I do have money, but I also have chicken in my freezer and I beat myself up for being so lazy as to get takeaway when I do have food that I am capable of cooking if i just push myself. But, if I push myself, the voms might start again.

Ugh balance is a difficult thing!! I am so glad spring weather has finally started, it makes movement that much easier! (Although raining today, that misty crap that doesnt stop nor does it get into the soil!) I think I am going to get a chicken burger. Arguing with the flow of my bodies requests never ends well for me 😉

 

[Puppet]

Went to the salon today and I am sooo happy with the result. They just chopped off so much hair, I went from length down to the end of my back, to now where it's just below my ears. All that weight gone, such a relief and it looks really great. And then I came home to three packages from Wish, which included my dad's present which I wasn't sure would arrive before his birthday; it did 🙂

So a good day and tomorrow will be, too.

 

[ILLYRIAN]

My friend Amber Bunny Slippers,
I have often washed my car, watered the garden then stood outside and waited for it to rain because willing the rain can take a month. I mean you've got to get it right as the after effects can be catastrophic. Just look at most countries who have attempted changing the weather. But about your washing the car and waxing it (I didn't know car grew unwanted hairs) but you worrying the car would get wet - got a convertible have you?
My god, you eat Broccoli whereas I am the consummate vegetarian protector, I leave the veges in the ground rather the pull them from the ground (torture the poor things) and I choose not to further torture them by boiling them alive.
Is the word vegans another way of saying murderers?

Oh and by the way how is the Christmas shopping going? Annoyingly cheerful huh?

 

[AnthonyCordova]

My week has been productive. I am getting deep into some books I finally have the time to read: Life of Samuel Johnson by Boswell, Selected Essays by Samuel Johnson, some lectures by Michel Foucault, and I just got in the mail vol. 1 of Sartre's character study of Flaubert, which looks really fun and interesting.

I'm preparing for possibly going back to school, but I'm still not sure for what yet. My girlfriend wants me to go back for nursing, (which is what I am leaning towards), but I also might finish my graduate studies in philosophy/comparative literature and try and seek tenure somewhere. I have some time to decide though, since I am waiting for my student loan forgiveness to go through.

I have my costume all set for Hallowe'en and I've reserved my spot for some big parties downtown. Looking forward to celebrating!

 

[Nix]

I feel surprisingly less hungover than expected today so far and received a lovely letter form my Uncle today which was nice. Today I have a lot to do in my living room as I ned to clear everything out and clean ready for new furniture next week as my sofa and armchair have died and need to go to furniture heaven (or hell, not sure which). Probably hell as the springs have gone and are trying to kill us all...

Later afterwards I shall be cooking up a roast beef dinner along with a Supernatural episode Im thinking,

@Amber Bunny Slippers I want to write a book one day but I need my parents to all pass away first! Sounds harsh but my book would break them!

 

[HowiMetdaSlayer]

Was supposed to work an early half day, but stayed 3 hours over to cover for someone. Big sale this weekend. So store buys bunch of free food for the staff. Friend emailed me coupon code for Hungry Howie's other day. Free 3cheezy bread & sauce (normally $6) with code online order only. Think you have to order something else. So ordered $3 pepperoni rolls. Picked up after work. Paid only $3 for $9 of food. Plus it's enough for 2 meals. Budgeting like a boss! 😎

 

[ILLYRIAN]

Nix,
why would your book break your parents?
Cheerful thought for the day - only 61 more shopping days until Christmas.

 

[Nix]

Nix,
why would your book break your parents?
Cheerful thought for the day - only 61 more shopping days until Christmas.

Yey Christmas 😀

I had a seriously wild youth and I've been through a lot in my time - non of which all my parents know about!! And one of my parents is still in denial about a few things..