There are many things that contribute to a long lasting relationship. One of the most important things is that both people see each other for who they really are. Many times couples idealize each other in their minds, and reality hits them much too late. This ideal love is far from ideal, and in fact is the foundation of a very unhealthy relationship. It happens when two people go through the phase of infatuation and never move past it. They each only see the good qualities of the other. They think that their love can overcome their differences without putting in effort. Sometimes, this relationship flaw is apparent to others, and sometimes it is very subtle. Couples have to move past the stage of infatuation and come to a realization that no one is perfect, and that this person they each fell in love with is no different. Each person must realize their own flaws to be able to accept the flaws in their mate. Two people must be able to see the flaws in each other, and not criticize but still love each other in spite of the flaws they find. Couples shouldn't necessarily search for the flaws, but they should be aware of them when they encounter them, and they should find a way to resolve the issue before it gets out of hand. No two people are alike, and no two people have the same flaws. That is why no two people love in quite the same way. It is a hard balance, because you don't want to share all of the same weaknesses as your mate, but you also don't want to have weaknesses that your mate could use to take advantage of you. But, when you start to discover the flaws in your partner, an amazing thing happens: you discover your own flaws. In the process of self discovery, a couple can improve themselves much more together than they ever could alone and as they work on improving themselves, they grow closer together.
