Post Stupid/Corny/Funny Jokes

whats the diffrence between a biscuit and an elephant?

have you ever tried dipping an elephant in a cuppa?





why is the sea wet?

cause the seaweed!





two sausages in a saucepan -

one said - its hot in here
t'other said - WOW! A talking sausage







KNOCK KNOCK
who's there?
THE LITTLE GIRL WHO CANT REACH THE DOORBELL

----
courtesy of my sister
 
I
inthedoorway
funny! but, does wet mean high where you're from? I dont get that one...
L
Lemon
Seaweed. HA!!
Here's the least horrible Helen Keller joke I know. 🙂

Did you see the huge pink doll house Helen Keller had in her backyard?
Shame, neither did she.
 
F
Fake Shemp
i badly smiled and goshed myself for doing so, shame on us
B
bloodflower
iu didnt know who she was so i had to google her to get it, i feel really stupid :D
Oooh, jokes!



Three men walked into a bar. You would have thought one of them would have seen it.




2 Fish were in a tank. One of them says to the other "I don't know how to drive this!"




3 Little old ladies were sitting on a park bench, enjoying the sunshine. Suddenly a man in a trenchcoat appears in front of them and exposes himself.
Mildred had a stroke.
Nellie had a stroke.
Rose, who was slightly more feeble, couldn't reach that far.


😛


Thank you, thank you....I'll let myself out!
 
I
inthedoorway
Gold Jerry, Gold! seriously tho, A plus plus on all 3
Friendly Lurker
Friendly Lurker
*Applauds*
R
Rayne
NICE!!!
Why do lions always eat raw meat?
Because they don't know how to cook.

What is an Eskimo cow called ?
An eskimoo.

What is a forum?
A twoum + a twoum.

How do you make a lemon drop?
Hold it and let it go.


(sw)
 
L
Lemon
The lemon one made me laugh really hard.
This one is really lame!

Q. What does a ghost call it's parents?


a. Mum and dad.


Q.Why doesn't Swedes play hide and seek?


a. Nobody wants to find a Swede
 
Bluebird
Bluebird
I laughed at the Swede one!
L
Lemon
Hahah :D
The man to his friend:
Last night I lost control over my car.
Good God, what happened?
My wife got a license.

Q. What do you call a Boomerang that won't return?

A. A stick.
 
One year, a husband decided to buy his mother-in-law a Cemetery plot
as a Christmas gift. The next year, he didn't buy her a gift.. When she
asked him why, he replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I
bought you last year!"
And that's how the fight started...
 
Let me pull out a lame one...

What do you call cheese that is not yours?

Nacho Cheese 😀
 
R
Rayne
I love that commercial!
A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not
happy with what she sees and says to her husband, 'I feel horrible; I
look old, fat and ugly.. I really need you to pay me a compliment.
'The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.'
 
J
Jersh
LMAO.
How many Merrickans does it take to change a lightbulb?

Five, one to hold the light bulb and the other four to turn the ladder round and round



How many Drogynites does it take to change a lightbulb?

Drogynites answer - "What's a lightbulb?"



How many.... ..people from Raiden does it take to change a lightbulb?

Don't know for sure, they're still counting.
 
J
Jersh
I'm still waiting on my placement.
C
Clem Rocks
How many VH'er's does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they all just sit there and bitch about it being broken.
My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were
in bed. I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have sex?'
'No,' she answered.
I then said, 'Is that your final answer?'
She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying 'Yes.'
So I said, 'Then I'd like to phone a friend.'
 
L
Lemon
HAHA. That's funny!
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