And your last sentence there is incredibly sexist. You just innately contradict your previous point. You don't want guys to generalize women's motivations for going out and yet in doing so make an offensive generalization of your own. You don't see the hypocrisy there? I mean, by your own definition of when it is and isn't appropriate for a guy to tell a girl she's being sensitive, who then are you to tell me what "most" of my gender does or does not think about women? It's okay for you make sweeping indictments of men? Why is that? What makes you different than what you're rallying against?
There are women who dress very provocatively with the sole purpose of attracting attention from men. There's not a thing in the world wrong with that, I don't give a damn how people spend their time, but it would be very unfair of me to label all women that way. There's no getting around it. If you something like "most men objectify women", that IS sexist.
Look. You're missing my point. I did not say "most men", and I would not say that (I said "men tend to", and I was talking about men as a group and our society's construction of gender and sexuality). I did not say that most men objectify women, and I don't think that it is wrong per se to see someone as a sexual object. (I never talked about sexual objectification actually.)
I was talking about men as a privileged group, and how our (sexist/patriarchal) society makes men (not "most men" but men as a group) believe that women's sexuality exists for men. Actually, our society creates women's sexuality to be "for men" – this is not something that only men are doing. This has nothing to do with "most men", I am not talking about statistics. I am talking about norms having to do with gender and sexuality.
I also definitely did not say that there it's wrong for women to dress sexy to attract men! I would never say that.
Alright, about telling girls that they are sensitive: This is a tool that people belonging to majority groups have used against minorities for a long time. In Sweden we have these problems right now:
Non-white people point out something racist, and white people say "that isn't racist, it was just a joke, you're being way too sensitive, why do you get angry about this, blah blah".
Straight cis-people say to lgbtq people "come on, you have the right to get married and adopt kids and now we even stopped forced sterilization of transsexuals, why are you still complaining about equal rights?".
Men say "this and that woman made her way to the top (of politics/some business), so obviously women can do it too, sexism doesn't exist!"
To make things very clear – I am not saying that any of you on the boards are saying or would ever say these things. But these are examples of how the "you're over-sensitive"/"you over-react"/"you're exaggerating" argument works.
I am not saying that women can't ever be sensitive, or "too" sensitive. I said what I did because OFAWB said "maybe I'm being too sensitive...", and someone said she was.
Edit: And. I'm not saying women can't be sexist and I'm not saying it's impossible to be sexist "against men" (I'm not sure how you put that but you understand what I mean right?). But be careful how you're using the "you're a sexist" argument. Often when an under-privileged group points inequalities the privileged group makes it look as if they're asking for special treatment. I did not say that "all men are sexists", and I would never say that. It's really problematic and common that men "feel accused" and try to defend themselves (usually by attacking) when women point out something sexist. Just like white people do when non-whites point out something racist.
