The Honesty Thread

[Lemon]

This thread made me laugh because I don't have a problem saying anything.

 

[Mozzymandias]

In High School I was stupidly shy and hardly talked to anyone, I regret this now because I could have made many more friends there if I wasn't.

I don't understand my brother or sister and why they care so much about opinions of other people who they hardly know or hardly even speak to, they constantly moan about their physical appearance and what people have said about them. All I can think is if your happy with how you look why give a damn what anyone else thinks and what do you care of someone's opinion again as long as your happy.

I prefer gaming with my friends than going to actually see them and go out or something.

My real life friends can sometimes be total asshats and because of this sometimes I just can't be bothered with them and ditch plans with them to stay on the computer or game.

I think some of my friends are total pricks with their family. I don't understand why they can't say that they love their mother on the phone in the presence of a male friend or kiss her on the cheek when they leave the house like I do.

I love college so much that I may actually cry the day we leave, I love my tutors, class and the subject.

Speaking of crying I made RayOfLight and Angelus013 on the boards watch OMWF and then they wanted to watch Tabula Rasa, and I cried at the end of it in front of them, they had never seen me cry before then

 

[Joan the Vampire Slayer]

Fun idea for a thread 😉 I'm down to kill some time before I head off to rehearsal.

So, I'm sopposed to confess something(s)? Is that the idea? Hell, I always say no secrets. I'm pretty transparent, anyway.

Gandhi said there could be no cleansing, no redemption without confession.

Here I go:

Well, I spent about 9 years of my life obsessed with Hanson. I've seen them over 10 times in concert, and met them quite a few times as well.

I get irritated and impatient with people really easily. It's something I'm working on.

Dirty Dancing is my favorite movie, EVER. I watch it often. Maybe I'm a closet romantic.

Sometimes I think about leaving. Just packing my things in my car, not telling anyone, and driving far, far away where no one knows me and I can create an entirely new identity for myself.

I love romantic and victorian poetry. I read it for fun. I can feel like I can identify with a lot of it.

I have issues with chronic back pain and I also just recently have been diagnosed with depression AND chronic fatigue syndrome. Expains why I'm tired all the time.

I have always said I don't believe in prescription medication. Yet, lately, I've consitered changing my stance on that and I feel like a sell-out.

I can't lie. It's too much work.

I really can't stand Brad Pitt. I think he's mediocre in every way.

My father died when I was 5. He was an alcoholic, and his liver shut down. He was 33.

I worry about becoming an alcoholic myself - but not enough to stop drinking.

And finally....I know all the words to the High School Musical soundstrack. 😉

 

[Revolver]

This thread made me laugh because I don't have a problem saying anything.

Interesting that the two people claiming they have no problem saying anything have had the least confessional/honest things to say so far.

---------- Post added at 10:33 PM ---------- Previous post was at 09:08 PM ----------

It makes perfect sense. You're coming into the thread and laughing at others and boasting about how you're always honest and yet your posts in this thread are among the least honest. If you're going to make a bold claim that you are always honest and even look down upon others in the thread, back it up with something. Otherwise, your words mean absolutely nothing and one is left to conclude that you are, in fact, not the bold person you claim to be.

 

[Harm]

Ok, let me try one:

-I hate people who start drama for no reason unless it's me.

 

[Revolver]

Good thing 95% of the time it is you, then.

 

[Harm]

Of course! I love to start things. But don't be rude to me for no reason, because I can also end things. 😀

 

[DayVBayB]

- I'm a very bad procrastinator
- Arguments are (?)fun(?)

 

[BuffyElevated]

When I was in junior high, I got in fights so often that I spent almost every single Saturday in detention. I would just get pissed off and hit people, even boys-and I never lost a single fight... To this day, even though I haven't fought anyone from my hometown since 8th grade, girls in this town are scared to mess with me. (I don't feel that I'm that bad! LOL)

When I first got married, my husband worked in a different state and was gone a lot. I ended up having a long distance affair with my best guy friend, who lives in Australia, and almost ran off to be with him. Now I'm glad I worked it all out with my husband!

I am a binge eater. It's something I've hidden from everyone since I was 11 years old. I have tried to stop myself, but have been unsuccessful. 🙁

 

[disturbedvanity]

I took (snorted) a LOT of oxycontin the other day.

I have had a lot more sexual partners than I admit to.

I am shallow when it comes to a lot of things.

I would rather sit at home on my laptop than go out and socialize.

I would rather hang out with my parents' friends than my own. They're AWESOME!! lol

 

[Airam]

Okay... I'll start with the easy stuff and work my way to the serious things....

I have an extreme irrational fear of lizards. When I lived in Florida they would randomly show up in my room and I was convinced they were out to get me.

My first concert ever was Menudo, the Puerto Rican boy band Ricky Martin was once a part of... in my defense I lived in Puerto Rico at the time and I was 7.

I like to sing along to Kelly Clarkson's "Since You've Been Gone" at the top of my lungs, and also select Christina Aguilera stuff, "Fighter" in particular.

I have a serious T.V. addiction. You think you have me beat, you don't, trust me.

I watch and enjoy the hell out of Dancing with the Stars. I got into it because Joey Lawrence was on in the 3rd season. I have been in love with Joey Lawrence since I was 9 years old and Blossom was airing, at which time I wrote him a fan letter telling him so. 15 years later I was attending the Dancing with the Stars Tour cause he was a part of it and while there I bought a Joey Lawrence coffee mug that I drink coffee out of every morning.

I've still never seen Firefly cause I still don't believe I'll like it, despite everyone telling me I SO will.

I know I'm still not over my first love, its been like 5 years since we broke up, I still compare everyone to him, eventhough (for the split seconds I allow myself to admit it) he was a total jerk to me... but I still see him as my soulmate.

I pulled a total Felicity for said first love and moved to Georgia to be with him, sometimes I think its the worst mistake I ever made and I constantly wonder what my life would be life if I'd stayed in Tampa.

If I could I would live my life out forever in the 7th and 8th grade. I know its equal parts regret and nostalgia but I so want to go back and re-live it and change stuff.... My bestfriend killed himself in the 8th grade, it'll be 14 years on Friday. I hate myself for not seeing it coming and if I couldn't do anything to change it the second time around, at least I'd be stuck forever in a time where he wasn't dead.

My father died when I was 11 years old. At the time I lived in Tampa, he still lived in Puerto Rico. The cause of his death was never really explained to me and I wasn't flown out to the funeral, I was in school the next day. I KNOW I've never dealt with it, still have never been to his grave and at this point I'm so ashamed that I don't even know how my own father died that I'm afraid to ask.

I do know he was severly manic-depressive and addicted to both drugs and alcohol. I fear everyday that its my destiny too.

In college, during a Halloween party my roommate and I threw at our apartment, I woke up in my room on my bed half naked with a friend of a friend on top of me. I freaked out and threw him out because I had no idea how I came to be in that situation. I remember being really drunk and going in my room and shutting the door and goin to sleep, alone. The guy would never own up to what happened and I ended up having to go get the morning after pill cause I couldn't be sure if I'd been date raped or not.

*phew* Now you guys know me as well as most. Nice and theraputic thread COtA.

 

[November]

So reading this thread has kind made me felt a bit less like a total nutcase so now I feel like sharing some little tid bits bout me, maybe someone will feel better after reading it too.

I spend so much time online, I think I am closer to some people on here than people in my 'real life'. I wonder how I come across online as I can hide things well in speech but not in typing. I appriciate you guys in chat and on msn more than you know.

Even though I'm well aware my liver is starting to fail, I still had beer for breakfast and have barely had a day off drinking for over a month now. I drink even more than I let on and alot of the time I forget what I have done with my days or who I have talked to. Im worried that I wont be able to stop in time for when I need to go back to RDA and possibly put the safety of my students at risk. I've been on the E's about 3 times a week for the last month or so aswell, even just to go to the servo for smokes.

I was diagnosed with Bi Polar 2 when I was 18 and have been a self harmer since I was 12. My scars are starting to fade and Im so happy about that, but at the same time I want to make more. I hate stitches so I rarely get them if I can help it (Fixamol is the best stuff EVER). I still hide it very well and not even my family knows the extent of it.

I have been admitted to psych wards over 10 times, mostly in private clinics but twice in a locked ward on constant sucide watch (and no, it is not as glamourous as girl interupted or any of those other movies). My longest admittion was just over 3 months, and my shortest was 72 hours ( I nicked off as soon as they opened the security doors). My sucide attempts are embarassing and laughable. On more than one occasion I have woken up in the ED and seen dad in next bed across (he has severe heart problems) with us both hooked up to machines and drips. We have a running joke about whos heartrate was the highest. He won with 400 beats a minute before it konked out and they had to zap him.

I think Buffy has stopped me from doing more damage. I cant explain it, but it has always been an escape for me to sit down and watch it. Im distracted yet I dont have to think too hard because I know what is going to happen. I dont think I will ever get sick of it.

I hate kids and never want them, nor do I think I will ever get married. Although I am curious about what it is like to be properly pregnant. I dont think I am Bi, but I have probably kissed more girls than guys, but only gone further a few times with chics. I dont ever see myself in a long term relationship with either sex so I duno what that means. Friends with benefits is the best thing ever. I hate being commited to things.

Oh and I am a fan of Twilight, I do see the crap bits about it, and do laugh at everyone pulling the piss, most of the time I agree with the haters of it but the epic love stuff wins me over. I just wish she actually wrote some juicy action! (sw)

I betcha I will regret writing all this later but Im drunk and in a rambling mood (whats new ay).

 

[Tueuse de Vampires]

I think I'm on of the biggest hypocrites in the world. I have all these nice principals and everything, but I never stick to any of those myself.

Very often I feel like a spoiled brat who never had any real problems in life. I know this should make me happy, problem free life, but in a way it makes me feel like I need to create the drama myself.

 

[Edmund Blackadder]

Of course! I love to start things. But don't be rude to me for no reason, because I can also end things. 😀

How?

I have no doubt you amuse people, but I would be interested to know how you "can also end things".


------------------------------------------------------

My turn:

I hate it when people that misunderstand my friendliness as attraction.

I can't accept other peoples help at all.

I am pig-headed sometimes but only when I believe I am right - if I am wrong, I will acknowledge that!

I dislike people who make claims about themselves like "I don't take crap from anyone" or "If you start something I will end it" because most of the time they are just posturing, and they aren't very good at it.

I generally DO always end it, not because I am correct or what, but because I am too stubborn to not have the final word - I've lost friends because of that.

 

[Bluebird]

- I find this thread hilarious

People opening up about their problems, telling us about their past - may it be sexual abuse or attempted suicides - and generally being very honest, is hilarious?

I'm not starting any 'drama' here (before, you know, you have to 'end it' 😛) just wondering what your answer is.

Oh and don't use your standard 'I love to start things' line, that's boring. Try being honest. And also, you're not bothering me in the slightest. I'm not angry or anything, I'm just curious about what you said.

---------- Post added at 12:12 PM ---------- Previous post was at 11:53 AM ----------

BillyIdolWannaB agrees: I found it hilarious but i do like peoples misery🙂 im like lilah.

Ok, so then really? Sexual abuse and attempted suicides are funny? These are real people, you know. Not characters from a tv show.

 

[Nix]

Well I don't know where to start. I think everyone here is very brave opening up about all sorts of things.

Me, well, where to start?

When I was 4 I was bitten by a dog between my eyes and so now i'm not so keen on big dogs.

When I was 13 I suffered my first depression.

I have been diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder and PTSD.

I'm on medication for my Bipolar and will be for the rest of my life (unless I get pregnant again).

I lived in Ibiza for 6 months.

I was raped at 21.

I was told at 29 I would probably not be able to have kids. I had a baby girl when I was 34.

I have had many a bad boyfriend and a stalker.

I have pannic attacks and anxiety attacks.

I love Tv too much.

I love Angel more than I love Buffy.

I have watched Buffy since it first aired on UK tv.

Tv helps me escape reality.

I am over weight and need to loose some serious fat.

I am online way too much.

I love my online mates as much as my real mates.

I see my online mates as real people with real emotions.

I love chocolate too much.

I feel uncomfortable writting some of this but I feel I need to as so many others have been honest and brave.

 

[Bluebird]

To be completely honest, I hate people. I wasn't surprised when a couple of people had been laughing at this thread (yeah, cos rape and suicide is hilarious...) cos I have no faith in people as a whole. I find them greedy, selfish and nasty and overall it's kinda depressing. And I'm including myself in that too.

 

[Perny]

I can't cook. Well I try, but I will most likely burn stuff(myself included) or destroy something in the kitchen. I need bullet proof instructions how to cook a normal meal. But when it comes to desserts, I can whip up the most delishious things.

When I am feeling sorry I usually listen to J-pop.

My cousin, who was my best friend ever, got pregnant last year, and I haven't spoken to her since. She disgust me extremely after she run off, and got a boyfriend without telling me. We were best friends, but she couldn't tell me why she suddenly weren't around anymore. Then she got pregnant, and she just...For God's sake, she's 3 month's older than me! She was 17 when she got preggo. You think you know people...

I once reported my neighbor to the police because she hits her kids. I was tired of hearing the 4 year old screaming "Mommy don't hit me, it hurts." No one should hit their kids. IT'S NOT OK!

 

[BuffyElevated]

People who get genuine pleasure out of other peoples' misery make me so sick I could spit in their face.

This thread has been WONDERFUL therapy, and I feel a lot closer to you guys. 🙂

I also feel very close to the friends I make online. It may sound stupid to some, 'cause I know some people are pathological liars and may never really be themselves, but I care too much about people. I will even sometimes bring up stuff that my online friends have said to me in normal conversation, and other people look at me like I'm nuts.

I probably am nuts but I don't care. I am a generally happy person and I don't care if people think I'm a psycho. 🙂

Out of all my ex boyfriends, 3 of them have come out of the closet since we broke up. Sometimes I wonder if there's something wrong with me that I made them be that way, and other times I just tell myself that they just decided if they couldn't have me, no other woman was good enough so they went gay. LMAO

I am a very spiritual person, but I can't bring myself to step foot in a church because of numerous things that have happened to me over the years with church people.

I cuss way too much. I have seriously tried to stop, but I can't do it. Sometimes I feel like I have Tourette's 'cause I say them without even thinking about it.

One of my ex boyfriends, who was also one of my best guy friends, killed himself in December and I still think I could have stopped him. I think about and dream about him more than I think is normal.

 

[ItMustBeBunnies]

Wow, Im amazed at this thread and the confessions that some people have made, I admire and respect all of you who have said something so personal about yourself.

I wanted to confess some stuff aswell, I actually thought about what I was going to say all damn day, but I think I have chickened out again. Only 2 people on this board know my massivest deep dark secret that has screwed me up royally, and a couple of others know about the other crap that is happening right now, but most of the time, even irl, getting info out of me is like pulling teeth. I think its mostly because I really do think that nobody actually gives a crap, they dont actually care about what I have to say or anything, they are just waiting for their turn to speak, I hope Im wrong on that one, but thats really how it feels sometimes. The people in my life who know about "that thing that happened" were very supportive and all when I first told them, but now, if I try and mention it, because I feel like if I dont sometimes I really will go insane, they get all....fidgity. So I have learnt to keep my mouth shut. Ive gotten very VERY good at repression and pretending certain things never happened, I havent decided if thats a good thing or not.